Giselle "G" Rowe
Saturday, October 29 | 11:42 a.m.
Crystal Lake Condominiums
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The faint aroma of cologne and fresh paint greets my nose before I've even fully opened my eyes. I'm laying on a plush mattress while the sun shines obnoxiously through my eyelids and the the sheet that I've placed over my head. A quick stretch of my legs and my arms reveal that I am alone in bed.
I pull the covers down slightly and take in my surroundings. The black and white decor, the empty but tidy room, and the shirt that I'm wearing is a quick reminder of where I am. Suddenly, everything from last night comes flooding back into my mind.
The apple martinis. The tears that I kept at bay. Niko. Dexter's surprisingly good performance. June sucking my titties.
My stomach flutters at the last thought.
Where is he now?
"June?" I call, a little raspiness to my throat, as I completely slide off the bed and enter the living room. The giant shirt falls just above my knees.
No response. I guess I'm here alone.
I head back into the bedroom to grab my phone before deciding to go brush my teeth in the master bathroom. Luckily, there are brand new toothbrushes below the sink. I hit the power button and the screen lights up, showcasing multiple missed calls and texts from my parents. Without a second thought, I call my mom back, wetting the toothbrush under the strong stream of water.
"Girl, I was just gettin' ready to file a missing person's report. Where the hell you at?"
"A friend's house, ma. My bad, I fell asleep before I could text you. I'm coming back today though."
She hums and I can just imagine her rolling her eyes on the other line. "Next time, don't have your parents worried to death. Say something before you even leave the house."
"I swear they gone be the death of us." My dad chimes in exasperatedly from the background and I shake my head. "Both of 'em!"
"Okay, love y'all. Bye."
My mom fusses a little bit more before hanging up the phone and I sigh, scrubbing my teeth and washing my face. Deciding that that isn't enough, I hop in the shower, opening a new bar of Dove original soap.
The best scent.
As I rinse my body, flashbacks of last night hit me over and over again, stirring up the lustful emotions that I always try to keep hidden. The same question echos in my mind as well.
Why did he stop?
I'm no fool. It was clear as day that June's body language shifted almost instantly. Even though I could still feel him growing beneath me, he became more gentle and ultimately, put an end to what we had started without even uttering a word about it. I think the craziest part of it all though, is that is only makes me want him more.
Men aren't totally desperate for it excite me.
A rarity.
I dry off, throwing on just the large t-shirt again and heading back into the living room.
"Aight, cool. Just call me back when you know sumthin." June is standing in the kitchen now with a brown paper bag in his hand, phone pressed to his ear and his back to me since he's just shut the front door. Dressed simply in a sweatsuit, one gold chain, and his durag under his hoodie, his face looks well rested and moisturized.
June's furrowed brows soften when we lock eyes and I can't help but to feel shy as his eyes sweep over my exposed thighs. A few moments later he ends the call and locks the door.
"Shit, I ain't think you was gone get up before noon the way you was sleepin'. Yeen een go to bed that late either." He chuckles, pulling out two large wrapped sandwiches from the bag and setting them on the counter. "I got you a sausage and cheese biscuit from the place down the street."
"Thank you." I reply, rolling my eyes playfully at his earlier remark. "I had to sleep off my emotional exhaustion and what not."
"Heard you." He nods, unwrapping his sandwich and taking a generous bite. I follow suit, pleasantly surprised at how moist and buttery the biscuit is. "Damn."
"Shit fye, ain't it?" He smirks, and I nod. We spend the next fifteen minutes or so making idle conversation as we finish eating. June is the first one to ball up his empty wrapper, sliding his front across my backside to get to the trashcan.
"Damn, you ate the whole thing."
"And?" I crane my neck to the side, unscrewing the top off of the plastic water bottle and bringing it to my lips. He slips his arms around my waist and plants a kiss on the side of my head.
"I like that shit."
"Liar." I laugh, attempting to shrug him off me, but he doesn't budge. "You just tryna be funny."
My whole life, my mama has chastised me for devouring food 'like a man would," but I've never cared. I am who am and if I'm hungry, then the whole world gone know it. Oh hell, oh well.
"Whatchu mean? I love when women shove a whole sandwich in they mouth." He chuckles, patting my butt and I gasp, hyper aware that I'm not wearing any panties.
"What women?" I raise an eyebrow, watching his grin grow wider as he grabs a paper towel and a bottle of Lysol.
"I meant, only you, Giselle. I like everything that you do." He sprays the cleaning product twice before wiping down the counter.
"Nice save." I hum, closing my now half empty bottle.
"Man, whatever. You bein' a baby." He rolls his eyes dramatically, walking behind me again to throw away the now yellow paper towel and I secretly admire his natural eyelashes.
"I'm the one that should be callin' you that." I turn on my heel and head into the living room.
"What? No response?" I tease, stealing another glance at him over my shoulder. He just exhales through his nose and strokes his chin hair, silently admitting defeat.
We spend the next few hours bouncing between genuine conversation and flirtatious joking, before deciding to head out for some hot apple cider. My favorite café usually stops selling it after October, so I've been stopping by to get a large cup every chance I get.
I've managed to style yesterday's look into something awkward, but still kind of cool in my opinion. By tying up the oversized shirt that June's letting me keep into a knot while sliding the tubed dress down into a form-fitting skirt and throwing my oversized jacket on top, I don't look much different than the unique fashionistas that I admire constantly, walking up and down the busy street. The finishing touches are just some gold hoops, clear lipgloss outlined with brown lip liner, and my straightened hair into a loose bun on top of my head.
The elevator dings as it opens, revealing a smiling Ethan. He looks so much different than when I saw him last and it's not just because of the casual clothing and messy hair. His energy is light, his voice is cheery as he greets us, and most notably, there's a beautiful woman beside him.
With olive toned skin, dark hair, a slim figure, and full lips that are painted red, it's clear that she is of Hispanic heritage. One of her hands is comfortably resting on Ethan's bicep and the pink stains on his face tell me everything that I need to know.
"Wassup, Ethan and Jessica." June nods back at them before we swap places and she politely waves with her free hand.
Oh, so he got his girl back.
I wait until the doors are almost closed to shoot June a knowing smile and he shakes his head, matching my energy.
"You know what? Good for him." I purse my lips together, stifling a giggle. "Her too."
"What was that shit you said the other day?" He presses the button to the ground floor and leans against the reflective metal wall. "Pussy make the world go around."
"Love." I sigh. "I said love, sweetheart."
**********
Tuesday, November 5 | 2:01 p.m.
The Rowe Residence
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"Look, my nigga this dedication, this is anti-hesitation. This a a real nigga celebration."
The late, Nipsey Hussle's voice blasts through my speakers as I collect all of the cut fabric and miscellaneous sewing debris off of my desk. My bed is stripped naked as my sheets spin in the washing machine and I've sprinkled just a little carpet freshener down.
Cleaning up is the equivalent to getting my life together, so of course I'm feeling pretty good. My car is set to get out of the shop soon, I've completed two more orders, and even though it's only day three of me getting back to my workouts schedule, I feel unstoppable.
Can't nobody can tell me shit.
My shifts at Heated Prime are starting to fill the hole that my car repairs costed me so that adds another thing to my imaginary list of 'things to smile amount.' I'm counting my blessings, that's for sure. I can't help but to give June some credit as well. Having somebody to listen to me really was the first step in getting my mind right.
They say that a shoulder to cry on is a di —
The washing machine beeps obnoxiously and I head to the laundry room to transfer my bedding into the dryer quickly, not wanting to lose my momentum.
"Dedication, hard work plus patience. The sum of all my sacrifice I'm done waitin'. I'm done waitin', told you that I wasn't playing. Now you hear what I been sayin'. Dedication."
After that hard ass week, I've got a new fire under my ass to go after everything that I constantly daydream about. My determination is there, I just gotta stay focused. I'm holding off for just a few months to start back applying to apartments as I wait for things to line up just a bit more.
A new text message notification comes through my phone, dimming the music slightly and unfortunately, it's not from anybody that I expect... or want to hear from. Semaj has sent a lengthy paragraph, pouring his heart out to me and asking for another chance. I've ignored him for weeks now, but clearly that doesn't matter enough for him to stop trying.
I almost find it endearing, really.
Almost.
I exit out of my messages and lock my phone, choosing to go get the vacuum cleaner to pick up the lint and powdered carpet freshener. The aroma in my room becomes even more delightful and my sense of accomplishment grows.
Maybe I'll respond to Semaj later. Right now though, I got shit to do — none of which involves rekindling old flames with zero passion.
Focus, Giselle. Just focus.