Xander's POV:
"Are you satisfied now?"
The man who had been underground for weeks looked up at me. His skin was filthy and his once fine hair was ruffled like wild grass. He was beyond recognition. He was no longer the man he was before.
"I know nothing of what you speak," he croaked, avoiding my eyes.
"You know exactly what I am speaking of," I spat, glaring at him with judgment.
One day had already passed since I arrived at this castle. It had been exactly a week since I left. A week since I saw her and tried all I could in my power to protect her.
And what happened at the end?
"Let me ask you a question, Lord Esther," I whispered, swirling the silver goblet in my right hand.
The man looked up, surprised that I addressed him by the title I stripped him of. The man had been turned into another, a different being as if the lack of alcohol had, at last, kicked some sense into his head.
"You will get nothing out of me---"
"What do you gain by serving him?"
He looked at me as if he saw a spirit. My heart was burning with a fury that I was unable to water down. But my eyes showed otherwise.
"What did you want that he offered that I can not?" I questioned, staring at the disheveled man. "Why did you value dishonoring your King and butter up to another?"
I expected his lack of words. What else did he have to say? What could he tell a man he betrayed when being confronted? I sighed deeply, looking at the one window of the room. The rays of the sun were bright, contrary to the present predicament.
"Do you love your son, Darwin?" I asked him, my sights still on the window.
A long pause and then, "Do you wish to punish him for what I did?"
It was a snarl. I turned my gaze at him coolly and leaned back on the chair. The room was lightless, all except that one window. But I could still make out the frown on the old man's face.
"I will never punish a son for his father's blunders," I said calmly.
It was hard to imagine how I was this collected when I was crumbling part from within. The man sniffed and glanced at the glass of wine which he left untouched ever since the beginning of our conversation.
"Is it poisoned?" he asked, glancing at me suspiciously.
"No," I replied and my hands reached into my pockets. "Unless you wish for it to be,"
I pulled out a small blue vial containing a teaspoon of liquid and threw it on his lap. He shuddered as he even did not dare to touch it.
"I will grant you a painless death," I told him, crossing my legs. "In exchange, I want you to hear me out,"
The man glanced at me, puzzlement painted all over his face. He kept his guard as he carefully took the vial and stared at it. Out of nowhere, he chuckled.
"I will not be grateful, boy," he said, as he pulled out the wax seal and poured the contents into his wine without hesitation.
"My child is dead,"
He froze as he was just about to touch his glass. I stared at his rigid fingers, inches away from the death he wanted.
"What?"
"The King you chose over me had used the most complicated scheme. First, he had people trick a sixteen-year-old girl to meddle with food. Then, he had one of his men dress as one of mine and forced my wife to go through brutal pain, leading to miscarriage,"
His eyes fell on mine. For a fraction of a second, I thought I saw fear and guilt in his gaze. Just for a moment. I sighed, aching as I remembered yesterday.
The constant sobbing of Karra, the hurried and chaotic explanations from three people, who each blamed themselves for what took place.
I did not dare to enter the room at that time. But my emotions overwhelmed me and I darted into her chambers. I hoped that this was all but real.
When I saw her bloodless face, I knew. I knew this was the reality, as real as it could ever be. That pain...I never could have explained it.
The child I never got to know and never will.
"To kill the King and his heir was what he wanted, was it not?" I breathed, gripping the goblet tight as ever.
"He does not share all his agendas with me," The former Duke explained. His next words took me off guard. "Is the Queen well?"
"She has not woken up yet,"
There was nothing wrong in discussing issues with a man who would be dead before the sun descended.
"How...How is my son?"
I studied the eagerness on his face and wondered. Was he any different than the previous Duke who was a traitor? If he was, then why was he one in the first place?
"Wilford is all but fine," I told him, shifting in my seat. When he opened his mouth to speak, I cut him off. "How can he be fine when his father had shamed his entire family and Kingdom?"
He averted his gaze, back to the poisoned wine. I fell back silent, trying to navigate through the internal storm in my head.
"Is this what you expect from a King, Lord Esther? The murder of unborn children?" I asked him, not in a kind way.
He flinched as soon as the words fell on his ears. But I wanted to taunt him more. I wanted to let go of my anger toward someone. Someone who deserved to receive it.
"You have a granddaughter, do you not? Do you think he would even hesitate for a moment if the situation put her life at risk?-"
"I do not want to hear it!"
"You have no authority anymore," I reminded him sternly. "Do you know why I am here? Why I gave you that poison?"
He looked at me with doubtful eyes. Until a few days ago, I was as calm as a river. A river is calm if it remains undisturbed. And ever since I heard of what happened to my wife, of what happened to my innocent child, I threatened to flood anyone and anything who stood near the bank.
"If you think Elest Simion would even put a toe into this castle, you are everything but right," I told him, my voice filled with contempt and confidence. "I just want to let you be aware of the fact that he would never reach here to save you from your doom,"
The bulky man looked at me, his eyes glittering. I had no interest in being a calm river anymore. I leaned forward, looking at him with a gaze so intent, that it could cut through stone.
"Do you know why I assured you a painless death?" I asked, in a softer tone. "I could have you tortured in the worse way imaginable. I can have you ravaged by my wolf. So, why did I not proceed with those ideas?"
We stared at each other in strained silence. I knew he was deep in thought about what I asked him. But I went on.
"I do not even carry a sword with me now," I revealed quietly. "Even if you say something impulsively, I have no means to kill you to soothe my anger,"
His dull eyes looked at me, still questioning. Maybe he was too tired to take a guess. I sighed and stared down at him, as hard as I could.
"Because I want you to redeem yourself,"
This time, I knew he was shocked beyond anything. It was crystal clear in his eyes for anyone to see.
"Drink that wine and die without remorse. You will be forgotten. Even your son would not mention your name to his children," I told him, in a voice that came out with difficulty.
"Or you can take this chance which is your last to redeem your morals, Darwin. If you do, I shall never forget the help you delivered to me,"
And now was the waiting game. I decided to come up with this plan, hoping to make some improvements in my situation. And if he still had a clear conscience, he will choose the right option.
Minutes went by. The man had been staring at the glass of wine, wordless. At last, I sighed, not attempting to hide my disappointment.
"Even at this point, I thought you were better than this," I told him, refusing to look at him.
I stood up on my feet, unbothered by his lack of words. With one final look at him, I raised my goblet for a moment before I emptied the cup.
It was sweet but it felt bitter in my mouth.
"Go ahead," I told him calmly.
I turned on my heels and walked toward the door of the dingy room. My head felt lightheaded and clouded by everything that was happening. My limitless patience had finally run out. I placed my hand on the door handle and opened it, prepared to leave the dingy room.
"Sealore!"
I halted in my steps and froze on the spot like a statue. I thought of it as a figment of my imagination. Yet when I turned around to face him, I knew it was not.
His eyes were more determined than I saw them before. And I knew that he was honest.
"He plans to have Sealore by his side. It will increase his numbers and chances of being King," he continued this time in a louder voice.
"Sealore had been defeated by my grandfather, his father when they attacked Anthreal," I let out, my voice low. "They have agreed to a pact that ensured their compliance. We still trade with them to this day. They could not have a better bargain with him,"
His eyes agreed and he licked his lips slowly. "It is because of those exact reasons that kept the King of Sealore from listening to him. Surely, as they have been defeated by Anthreal once, they would not dare to have the taste of shame twice,"
I exhaled, letting all this information sink in. To have an idea of what that terrible man had been hatching was one thing. But to hear it from the one who I least expected it from was another.
I gave him a calm look, eying him with judgment. He, making the right choice in the end, stared at the poisoned wine bitterly before reaching for it.
"Wilford!" I called the man, standing behind a wall at the turning of the hallway.
Darwin Esther stopped whatever he was doing and looked at me. I spared him a glance, letting out a hint of my gratitude with it.
I looked away to see Wilford Esther, walking towards me in a suspenseful manner. When he neared the door of the prison room, he hesitated to move further.
"You may see him," I told him, as I promised.
____________________________________
Catherine's POV:
It was a lonely place.
This place stretched out for miles and miles and seemed endless as the sky. I looked in all directions and only saw white all around me. What was this place?
"Who are you?"
I shuddered at the voice and turned around my heels. To my surprise, it was a small boy. His hair was as dark as mine and his small eyes glimmered in curiosity.
My heart melted as a smile played across my lips. I moved a hesitant step forward and peered at him closely.
"Little one?..." I called, kneeling.
The boy did not react to my words. He simply stared at me, unmoving.
"Who are you?" he asked again.
"I..." I trailed off. "I am your mother,"
This had to be him. He looked just like me. That small round face and plumpy cheeks were lovely to watch. It was strange for him and me to exist in the same space. And then, something started feeling wrong.
"Mother?" he questioned, tilting his head. "But that is not possible,"
My smile dropped as he said that. How could he speak coherent words? He is not even born. Yet, it hurt me when he said them.
"Why is it not possible, little one?"
"I can never have the chance to call you mother,"
Those words began echoing throughout the space and my head burst out in pain. I gasped and stumbled in my stance, closing my ears. When I looked in front of me, the little boy was walking away from me.
"No!" I shouted, reaching out for him. "Do not go..."
He never turned back.
.................................................................
My eyes jerked open suddenly and the plain wood color was displayed in front of my eyes. My breathing was ragged and droplets of cold sweat were all over my head and body. I looked around and noticed the familiar setting of my chambers.
What happened?
"Karaa..." my voice came out feeble and unsure.
No red-haired girl was rushing toward me. I pressed my palm onto the mattress and pushed myself to sit. By doing so, my body ached as if a thousand hammers have slammed on me. I made a disgruntled voice and found out my throat was as dry as a desert. Every breath I took was sharp and painful and all I wanted was to get out of this miserable feeling.
"Karra!" I yelled, as loudly as I could.
The door burst open and she appeared. I watched her sprint toward the bed as if her life depended on it.
"Your Grace..." she gasped breathlessly.
I saw how pale her face was. Her eyes were a little red and swollen, showing that she shed tears just a few moments ago. I shifted myself forward and she held my arm for support.
"You have to rest!" she cried, as sharp as a needle.
"Water..."
She quickly grabbed a small glass of water on the night table and helped me drink. It felt a little better after the refreshment. Yet, this pain all over never ceased.
Karra was wordless as she kept the empty glass back on the table. It was very unusual for her. I gazed away and let myself fall back onto the pillow.
"How do you feel now?" She finally asked.
"Very pained," I replied as I took a sharp breath. "What happened?..."
She did not respond, compelling me to have a look at her. Her face showed depression and all of a sudden, everything broke out in my head.
That man! His taunting...
Xander!
I quickly summoned my small strength to sit, ignoring the consequences of my actions. Karra made a worried noise and held my arm again.
"Where is he?..." I asked, already out of air. "Where is he?..."
"The King had returned yesterday, Your Grace," Karra looked up at me, her eyes gathering moisture. "I beg you...please do not struggle to move,"
The severity of her tone did not go unnoticed in my mind. But the fact that I was unconscious for a day made me trepidated. Karra sighed and helped me relax to a more comfortable position.
"I shall fetch the towels," she bowed quietly and walked away from sight.
I frowned and closed my eyes, recalling all the events I could. Something was not right. Feeling light-headed, I moved back and did not put much of my mind on it.
Out of habit, I placed my hand on my belly.
No kick.
That was strange.
I pressed my hand a little hard against my abdomen and found out that it was not as big as it was before. I creased my eyebrows and waited for a kick. My child never fails to do so.
Just then, Karra returned to the room and I looked at her. She held the soft white fabric which looked a little dampened in her hands.
"Karra," I called her softly. "I and the little one are hungry..."
Her eyes widened as she stared at me with utter shock. She looked at me as I pressed both of my palms against my belly and still expected a kick. The look on her face finally slapped me back to reality. No.
"What is the matter?..." I asked, letting out a nervous smile. "You are scaring me now,"
She looked away, refusing to look at me. It was as if the sight had pained her. I looked at myself and realized that my nightgown was more loosely wrapped around my body. Fear crawled under my skin like snakes as I looked at her again.
"What happened?" I asked her, this time as seriously as I could. "Tell me."
She forced herself to look at me and I found two tears crawling down her cheeks. Her expression was pure misery and it passed onto me.
"What happened!?" I shouted, even more afraid.
"I..." she choked. "I am sorry, Your Grace..."
I paused, studying the look on her face and her tone. My head turned toward my receded belly and that strange dream flashed across my mind.
"What happened?..."
It was not a question. It was a plea. My voice showed defeat but I still could not believe it. I would not believe it unless I hear it from someone.
"T-That man...h-he spoke all those cruel words to overwhelm you..."
"And then?" I looked up, my eyes are as wide with anticipation.
She paused before breaking down. Her voice was choked and I could not make much of it. But all I did were the words that shattered my heart.
"Y-You were already bleeding profusely and you...you..." she wept.
My voice gave up on me completely as I looked at her. The air in the room became too hard to breathe in.
"My child?..."
She shook her head slowly as she blinked a few more tears. Soon, my hands slipped away from my abdomen and rested on my lap quietly. Everything in my world fell dark and it was only the dark I saw.
"Leave me..." I told her, not meeting her eyes.
When I sensed no movement from her, all my emotions burst out without warning.
"Leave me! I do not want to see anyone! Leave!"
My body began to quaver vigorously but as I placed my hands on the mattress, trying to understand the complexity and cruelty of this occurrence.
My sweet innocent child.
When I heard the subtle sound of a door closing, my head turned slowly, only to find an empty room. As if my legs had a mind of their own, they forced me to get onto my feet. Every move I made caused intense pain searing through my body.
I walked toward the partition, behind which was the dressing table. When I made my way to the mirror, I almost jumped in fear.
The woman who stared back at me was not me. She had a white face and looked as if the blood was all gone from the effort she made while waking up.
Her eyes were swollen and there were dark patches under them, making her bleaker. Her dark hair was a beautiful mess that ought to have been combed to look like something close to civilized.
I moved forward and placed a shivering hand on the mirror. It was cold to the touch which made me shudder. The longer I stared at my reflection, the more I believed that we were truly the same person.
My eyes dropped down to my abdomen and I turned sideways, as I had done many times before. The big nightgown obstructed the view I wanted to see, causing me to pinch the sides of the fabric and wrap it against my body.
It was swollen. And it was not as large as it was supposed to be. My face fell into dismay as I let out a scared noise. I lost my balance due to shock and held onto the small chair for support.
Cry. Cry. CRY!
I ought to cry, like a miserable creature. But no tears came out of my eyes. I would go mad if I did not cry. I was going mad. I hoped my eyes were warming up and forced my mind to display the times when I still was with child.
My eyes were ice.
And no tears formed from them.
My sweet baby...
____________________________________
Author's NOTE:
😭