EVERYTHING AND NOTHING
"How are you feeling about the trial?" I asked the Professor Aude. Since I returned I found that I'd been spending a lot more time in her company than before. The woman had delayed her flight back to England, where she resided, in order to stay for the trial and be there to support us. Every step of the way I sought her counsel and she readily gave it.
"I don't know," she said honestly. "If it were up to the judge I would've told you the chances, especially after that outburst from Mr. Caffrey, would've been in our favor, but juries always so hard to put down. There really isn't a way to weigh which way the jury is going to decide anything. The second reason why more attorneys would rather settle if they can or have the court decide the matter."
"What's the first?" I asked filled with humor.
"Time," she laughed. "You age quicker during trial than anything else." I smiled and sipped the tea she had made me as my eyes gazed around her office. Unfortunately, Aude wasn't a tenured professor, despite how much Harvard wanted her to be. She had decided to only teach for this year before resuming work at her practice back in England. "You know Miss Wright, your dedication and skill during this case had been very... inspiring," she said. "I was wondering, as I have't taken anyone on as yet, if you'd consider a summer internship with me."
I looked up at her, my mouth slightly open. "Really?"
"Don't look so surprised," she said with an air of nonchalance. "We'd be leaving the day after tomorrow, so tell your parents if needed. Nothing for them to worry about, airfare and accommodations will all be provided."
An internship with Aude had actually never been in my plan, but it was something worth disrupt that plan for. Anything was better than going back to Greatwood and having to be around Danielle and Walter right now. As the days waned, I found that I didn't hate them so much, but I wasn't ready to face them and thought a couple months away in a different country and then some more months away at college before having to actually see them come Christmas or preferably my graduation next was would be enough time for bleeding wounds to be licked and heal. Though, my rising excitement was suddenly eclipsed by the tearful brunette sitting in Kappa and I suddenly exhaled hating, more than anything, the words that were going to come out of my mouth. "I'm sorry, but I can't accept," I said to both of our surprised. "And it's not that I don't want to because I do. This opportunity would be amazing for me."
"Which is why I don't understand why you're turning it down," she said before looking at me closer. "Unless this decision has something to do with a certain prince."
"Louis?"
Professor Aude sighed speaking more to herself than me. "Maybe you have less determination in you than I thought."
"This has nothing to do with Louis," I quickly refuted. Louis had nothing to do with my decision. "I just think you should offer the internship to Ana. After everything that's happened—whether the verdict is positive or negative—she's going to need something to take her mind off of what's happened to her."
Professor Aude sat back in her chair and studied me. "You know she wouldn't have done the same for you."
I nodded and shrugged. "Ana and I might have the same passion, but we're not cut from the same cloth. Thank you again professor for the offer... besides there's always next year." Setting the tea on her desk, I stood and made my exit when I heard her voice behind me again.
"Miss Wright," I turned back to the woman and saw and deepening exhaustion write itself across her face. "A word of advice until our next encounter. You'll find as you move through life that people aren't always like the cases we study in class. Not everyone is as clean cut and calculated as I suspect you need things to be. There are, in fact, a lot of grey areas in life and I find that if you try to force those situations into tidier shapes... well, they become more difficult to navigate than if you had just taken them as they came to you."
Allowing the woman's many shaped words to sink into my skin, I nodded my head to signal I understood before walking out of her office. The night sky was inky and the stale air was met with brilliant stars. The campus was barren, the black post lamps lighting my way back to Kappa House when I saw a familiar figure walking across. "Inez?" I called out as she turned to face me. I smiled and quickened my pace to meet her. "Hey, I was just headed back to Kappa House."
"Oh were you?" She said with a shifty smile, eyes glancing every which way before landing on me again.
"Are you alright?"
"Of course," I could tell she tried to say these word with as much enthusiasm, but it fell flat.
"Well, hey, we can walk back together if you want?"
Inez looked around as a car passed by her and she shook her head. "No, I'm waiting on Soren to come pick me up," she said. "I kind of owe him an explanation for everything that's been happening so..."
"Then, I'll stay until he gets here, you shouldn't wait alone."
"I'll be fine," she laughed me off. "He's caught remember. They have police surrounding him twenty-four-seven. I'll be fine waiting out for a few minute." I nodded, still unsure until Inez widened her smile and ushered me into the car waiting. "I'll see you at the hearing tomorrow."
As Inez closed the door a sinking feeling appeared in my stomach that told me I shouldn't stayed with her, but my driver was already taking off down the street and Inez's form shrunk from the back window of the car. Turning around, I exhaled and pushed off my anxieties.
When we pulled up to Kappa House I saw the police cruiser sitting outside and the two detectives got out as soon as I did and made their way to the front door along with me. "Miss Wright, do you have a moment?" One of them asked and I exhaled.
"I've told you everything I knew," I said unlocking the door and pushing it open. "The trial is tomorrow, your job is finished." Walking inside I tried to close the door behind me, but it was partitioned by his foot.
"Just a few minutes," he said as I opened it. "We just have a couple more questions for you about the case. If there's somewhere we can speak more privately."
I exhaled and opened the door for him to walk inside. Leading him to a more obscure room in the back of the house away from prying ears. I sat down on the table and he occupied the seat beside me. Noticing how much more at ease I felt on my own turf.
Then Detective Arnold slide a photo agains the table and my mouth went dry. In the photo, the man's appearance was younger than the last time I laid eyes on him nine years ago. Around twenty-five ro thirty years old. He had no crows feet and his face seemed sharper. His eyes could cut glass and for a moment I thought he would jump from the photo teeth beared and hands reaching for my neck. "No, I don't know anything about him," I lied because sitting here right now I could hear his voice, cold against my skin and raising the hairs. That pungent scent of roses filed my nostrils and in my throat his name ached to be said—
"Conrad Michaels is an international criminal wanted in twenty different countries for the sex trafficking of women," he said. "We have on good authority that it was him who Berkshire was working for a that you were fostered by him and his late-wife's care nine years ago." We were just wondering if he had somehow tried to make contact with you throughout the years, anything that would help us find him."
My mind was a frenzied of memories I had tried so hard to silence and now they were appearing fully formed. The large house at the end of the cul-de-sac the endless backyard Jane and I would take to. The large oak tree and bedtime stories. The hushed arguments. The blood coughed out of lips. The cold and basement filled with chained up women that were never seen again. All of it slammed into my mind until my jaw locked tightened, teeth near shattered and I pushed myself out of the seat. "I don't know anything," I repeated flinching as Detective Arnold reached for my arm. "I don't know anything."
"Okay," he said standing and picking up all the photographs. "Okay, well thank you for you time. If you do perhaps remember anything then you know where to find me."
He began to descend from the room when I found my voice again. "But... if I did—if I did know something, I would tell you to stop looking for him because if you're right about Christian working with him. Once he learns of his arrest he's gonna come looking for you."
Detective Arnold nodded his head before leaving me to my thoughts and I that I found myself falling to my knees.
We all stood while the jury and judge walk inside heart hammering inside my chest I was reminded of the indecisiveness that Professor Aude told me about. Every single one of the Kappa sisters were linking hands together, we had taken time out of our night to send up a small prayer, but this was another level of anxiety. There was no rule or reason to public opinion. While we had managed to gather the outside world to us, there were still those who opposed and hated us for speaking out. Now, the fate of many rested in the hands of these twelve people.
"You can be seated, thank you very much," the judge said for the final time today. "Thank you very much Ladies and gentlemen of the jury. I'm informed that you have a verdict, is that correct."
"Yes, we have."
"Is it unanimous?"
"Yes, it is."
"Has it been signed by your foreperson?"
"Yes, it has."
"Would you please give it to the bailiff."
The paper was transferred from the jury to the bailiff to the judge who looked down at it and sighed. Removing his glasses and looking up at the court in front of him. "This is jury's verdict in case 18b461-1 Balakrishna versus Berkshire count of battery and assault we the jury find the defendant guilty and on the count of attempted murder we the jury find the defendant guilty."
It was like a weight had been lifted in the air and suddenly we could breathe. The hollers and cheers swam through the court on our side. Though, in the midst of our celebration, I turned to see a stoic looking Christian Berkshire who sat without showing a single shred of emotion. Our part was over, in the coming day he would be given in sentence and whisked off to jail and yet, I found peace in that. The nightmare was over.
Still, the man's hard glare and cheeky smirk followed me all throughout the night and into Kappa's celebration of his sentencing of guilt. Drinks were passed around and everybody was whooping and hollering. The curfew was lifted.
"How come you're not joining the rest of your sisters inside," I looked up to Elliot as he sat beside me outside on the Kappa House porch.
I shrugged my shoulders. "Party's aren't really my thing," I said. "Besides I'll be celebrating tomorrow when I don't have to be escorted everywhere I go."
Elliot laughed before his smiled diminished and we turned to look at each other. "I heard about you and Louis."
I sighed. "Yeah, well somethings just aren't meant to be, no matter how much you want them."
"You know only a crazy person would give up the chance to be a real life princess."
I rolled my eyes, turning my head to look at Elliot. "There are more important roles to take on than Princess of a country."
The corner of Elliot's lips curled upwards and I felt my breathing quicken as his head leaned slowly closer to mine. The sudden ease came to my muscles and took away all the tension from the days prior, it was his super power, I decided. To set me at ease and it was also something I desperately needed now more than ever.
Though, the clearing of someone's throat suddenly broke us apart and I looked up to see Detective Arnold looking up at me. "Miss Wright, do you mind if I have a moment with you?" He said with a tense voice as he looked between Elliot and I.
"Sure," I sighed as Elliot and I got to our feet.
"Hi, I'm Elliot Ström," Elliot said taking the detective's hand.
"Detective Arnold Washington," Arnold said as the two guys shook hand and glared at one another.
I looked at the both of them, wondering what the hell was going on before I cleared my throat breaking them apart. "You needed something from me?" I reminded the detective as he took one last look at Elliot. "Detective."
"I'll just leave you two alone to talk," Elliot said before turning to me. "I'll see you inside?" I nodded as Elliot disappeared inside the storm of loud music and drunk students.
"Boyfriend?"
"What?"
Detective Arnold pointed his chin towards where Elliot had just disappeared to. "You two just don't seem like you'd match well. The Ström's aren't very accommodating if you know what I mean."
"What did you come here for Detective," I said. "I thought we were done with these meetings."
"We are I just thought I'd tell you that..." he took a moment to find his words. "Christian Berkshire is missing."
My breath caught itself in my throat. "What do you mean missing? I thought you all were guarding him."
"We are... or were," he breathed. "He escaped from his home. We don't know how, but we have every man out here looking for him so hopefully we can find him before the media catches wind of this. I just came to tell Miss Balakrishna and Miss Bernard."
"Inez isn't here," I said, "But I think it would be better if I told Ana."
"Alright," he said before taking a step back. "Hey, I'm sorry about all of this. We will find him. I promise you."
"Thank you."
My heart couldn't beat anymore. The thought of Christian running loose had taken everything from me. And when I made my way inside, the party still in full swing I looked to Ana surrounded by her friends and decided to wait until morning to tell her. It would be unfair to take her joy and justice away so soon into the celebration of her victory and happiness.
I waited until the sun rose on the next day before I knocked on her door. When her voice sank through the cracks telling me to come in. I did so seeing how everything had been packed. Ana putting her things away and she looked up with a smile. "Just the girl I was hoping to see," she said as I approached her.
"Ana I have to tell you something."
"Me first," she said her voice shaking just a bit. "These past weeks have been hard and in my absence you lead Kappa in a way that nobody knew and asked for. Which is why I'm making you the president next year."
"What?" I asked slightly shocked as Ana took her pin from her dresser and handed it to me. "Don't you have to be a member to become president."
Ana shrugged. "I doubt anyone's going to contest you after everything you've done for me... for us," she said. "And if they do they'll have to get through me."
I took the pin, the pin my mother once wore years ago and felt the cool metal in my hand. "Ana I have to talk—"
"And, I don't know if you've heard but I got the internship with Professor Aude," she interrupted me as she zipped up her suit case. "We're leaving today, which I know is soon, but only an idiot would turn down this opportunity." She said with pleading eyes.
"Ana..."
"Harriet." Ana sighed. There's was an edge in her voice, one which long ago I would've misconstrued for anger, but now saw as just her exhaustion taking precedence. "The past few weeks have been hard, but I'm leaving. I'm going to a place where nobody knows me, and where there will be no American media. So please whatever you're about to say, just don't."
I swallowed as she walked over to her balcony.
Moments later I joined and her name fell from my lips one last time because despite everything, I knew for a fact that ignorance was not bliss. "You don't have to say it," Ana said wistfully. "I already know."
But I did, because knowing something and hearing something were two different things and if I didn't then it wouldn't be real. If I didn't say it then the risk Ana brought to herself was tenfold. "He escaped."
Ana's fingers tightened around the balcony bannister and her eyes squeezed shut. "How?"
This time I didn't say anything, not because of the reality, but because I didn't know and those three words in the face of fear seemed to do more damage than the actual truth. So, I didn't say them and instead I stood next to the girl as she stands on the balcony of her kingdom and for the first time I was comfortable in the silence.
THE END