The papers trembled in your hands as you begin to involuntarily shake, the shock rushing through your body as your soon to be Ex-husband stood tall and composed in front of you.
You set the divorce papers down, holding onto the edge of the table to prevent your body from falling to the floor. Unable to look at him out of horror, Even if you had tried to look up at him, you wouldn't have been able to see him through the tears in your eyes.
"Where did this come from..."
Your breath became shaky, the bold words reading "divorce papers" wasn't even what stuck out to you the most, it was the pre written signature of your husband. He had already signed each and every blank line he was meant to before even letting you know he intended to divorce you. This wasn't something he wanted to workout, this was something he wanted over and done with.
"Will-"
Finally looking up at him, begging him to hold you like he used to when you cried like this. His form stood still and cold, You reached out towards him but he only pushed the papers towards you again, insisting you take them and read them.
Read them you did.
The papers told you all about how the divorce was going to work, how it had to be descreat and hidden from the public eye. It was to be announced as a mutual breakup and one that, while pained you both you had equally decided it was for the better.
"Is this real.."
"Yes."
You shook your head, it didn't make any sense. Last night you were laying in eachothers arms, whispering sweet nothings to eachother and laughing softly until you fell asleep. Just last week you were strolling the castle grounds together, teetering on asking about the possibility of children in your lives to fill the palace with more laughter than your own. No less than a month ago you were sitting next to him and his mother at the Royal ball, greeting his friends and family as you had done for years prior as his wife, forever his plus one.
"It's just a precautionary measure, In the end it will work out for the best."
His voice didn't sound as warm as it used to, it made you recoil into yourself. This wasn't your husband. You wiped your tears and as you spoke, your voice sounded weak and broken compared to his.
"This is cruel."
"Perhaps.."
Sliding the paperwork across the table and back towards him in disregard, this was not happening right now and if he stood by his vows it was never going to happen.
"No. It's cruelty like no other"
Your legs felt unstable, but you pushed yourself off the table. Taking a moment as a rush of blood flowed to your head and made the room spin for a second, deep breaths. Deep breaths.
You gave yourself a minute to compose yourself, not wanting to snap at him or break down in front of him. Both equal signs of weakness in this moment, anger and sadness.
"My whole life has been devoted to you, I've given up sleep, family and friends all so I can keep you happy"
This time when you step towards him he didn't step away, his eyes still focused on you as you stopped a few steps away from him.
"We we're happy, don't you dare lie to me and say we weren't"
Seeking the charity of his kindness. You needed him to step towards you, to engulf you in his arms, to hold you as close as possible and promise to never let go again. Instead he stood still, barely even taking in your emotion. So you pushed further, asking a question you were sure he would answer with kindness. A question that you were sure you knew the answer to.
"Was it truly all in vain? All those years of loving you?"
"Yes. Perhaps it was."
You stepped back. That was not the answer you had known to be true. He was lying.
"You don't mean that."
You waited, expecting him to give you some rational explanation as to what he truly meant. Because even if he didn't love you now (god forbid he didn't), he had loved you before.
Stepping back towards him and pointing an accusing finger into his chest you practically screamed at him.
"You don't fucking mean that"
The only emotion he showed to that was the slight flinch at the unexpected loudness in your voice, you were breaking in front of him and all he could react to was your loudness...
"You loved me I know you did"
You looked up at him, close enough that you could hug him yourself. But you were sure if he rejected you anymore than he had your heart would fall out of your chest and he would step on it as you watched.
He smelt the same, sage and lemongrass. The smell you would wake up to in the morning and fall asleep to each night, a scent that would normally bring you comfort. Now it just burnt your nostrils as you tried to fill your lungs with new air.
"No"
The room fell silent, if he was listening closely he would have been able to hear the sound of glass shatter inside your chest where he smashed your heart.
"No?"
He looked down at you, initiating eye contact for the first time since handing you the papers. Speaking slowly and clearly, as if he knew your mind was running so fast you couldn't process anything. He sounded almost gentle as he said it, trying to be cautious and kind.
"No I didn't love you"
You can't be kind while telling someone you don't love them. The beating in your chest rose into your throat. The air sucked out of your lungs as you felt the bile in your stomach rise, you were going to be sick. Stumbling back to found yourself leaning against the table, shaking your head.
"You did.."
Tears in you eyes threatening to spill over and flood the room. Breathing sharply to force air into your lungs again.
"No I-"
Snapping your gaze up to him, cutting him off as you screamed at him.
"You did, you fucking did."
Taking a deep breath, He looked down at you sadly. He was memorising what you looked like, He knew he didn't need to memorise it because he already knew everything there was about you. It was more of a last look before he crushed your heart and ruined the only person he ever wanted to spend his life with.
"How could I? How could I possibly love someone like yourself?"
He may as well have slapped you in the face, You looked away from him. Staring straight ahead, watching the memories of you and him be deleted right in front of you. Blocking them out from your memory, rewriting them with the plot of betrayal and deceitfulness.
"Wow"
A newfound anger flooded through you and clouded over all the love that you still had for him, as well as blocking any good judgement out.
"Fuck you"
He did look concerned, pained even. Whether he knew his words would have an effect on you and everything you ever saw about him or not, You didn't care and you refused to care. He stepped forward to take the papers off the table.
"You can take your time before you decide to sig-"
Before He had even finished his sentence. You had grabbed the papers out from in front of him and had signed every single spot you had two in the divorce papers before shoving the papers back into his hands. Refusing to look at him as he watched you leave the room, Leaving him behind.
Clutching the papers in hand. He waited for the door to close before falling to the ground, screaming into his own hands. You were to never know the truth, How he was so desperately in love with you that he refused have you put it harm's risk with a war boiling between his kingdom and another from the south. He knew you would stand by his side, fight with him and sacrifice anything that you could. He knew the other kingdom would do whatever It took to win, What if they took you? What if they killed you? There were so many he could imagine losing you, imagine something going wrong, All because you were his wife. He was not going to let that happen, The war wasn't preventable but saving you was.
Even if it meant the love of his life hated him for the rest of his days.
A/N
LORD KNOWS WILBUR DOESN'T SMELL LIKE SAGE AND LEMONGRASS, I just thought it was a funny reference.
Requested by @LiliaMBond mention a user