I come back to school the next week and everything is fine. I don't really speak to the boys much, since Heeseung still refuses to talk to me. I'm civil with the rest of them but because of him we still have to keep our distance from each other.
Heeseung basically ignores me like the plague; he walks in the opposite direction when he sees me, he doesn't turn up to home room anymore, even when he does see me he brushes it off and acts as if nobody is there. I still can't really understand why he's got such a big problem with me, when he's the one that's is wrong in this situation.
Since I've been back, things have felt a bit off. People have been looking at me very weirdly this whole week. I hear whispers and laughter and I can tell it's all targeted at me, but what have I done? I've been off school for a whole, there's not anything I possible could have done for people to act like this.
I try my best to ignore it as I head into the cafeteria, but it just feels wrong. The second I step in all eyes are on me before people quickly go back to doing what they're doing, but I can feel them catching glances at me every now and then. I cant even grab my food in peace without some acting like they're walking on egg shells around me.
I sit down with Sunbi, talking and laughing like we always do when I feel that weird energy once again. I can feel people's eyes on me. When I try to make eye contact with the people staring, they turn around and whisper to those around them.
In the corner of my eye, I see Hana looking around as everyone whispers with the largest smile on her face. I don't even know much about this girl except that she used to be really obsessed with Heeseung at some point according to Sunbi, but I don't really understand what that has to do with me.
Ever since I started at this school she's been giving me off energy; dirty looks in the hallway, whispering to people as I walk past and so on. Frankly, she's irrelevant to me hence why I've never really mentioned her to anybody. It has to be jealousy, what she's jealous of I don't really know and I could care less.
"I heard from Hana that Jiyeon has been talking about you!" The second I overhear that from across the table I freeze. There's no way I heard that correctly, I've not spoken bad on anybody in this school. I stick to myself and mind my business so how am I hearing this. I hate when people lie about me, it gets under my skin.
Instantly after I unfreeze, I turn towards Sunbi and fold my arms.
"I know you heard it too. Explain." I stare at her blankly as she tries not to make eye contact with me. I just roll my eyes and continue waiting for an answer.
"You see, it's not that important. I think we should just drop it." So Sunbi is trying to divert the subject now. That's not gonna work with me, I'm gonna find out what's going on right now.
"You're trying to hide something? If you just tell me I can settle everything now calmly. But if you don't tell me, let's see what will happen if I go up to Hana and ask myself!"
Immediately, she starts to wave her hands around as if to tell me to stop. I nod slightly and rest my arms on the table as I wait for her to tell me everything, she takes in a very deep sigh before she says anything
"Hana has been spreading a lot of rumours about you. She's been everyone that the Wild Ones has been passing you around, saying that you're easy a-"
I put my hand up to her face, telling her to pause for a moment. What in the absolute foolery is this girl talking about?!, I wave my hand, signalling her to resume. And this is what shocks me more.
"Apparently she saw you and Heeseung in the library, said that you were trying to seduce him. He rejected you and that's why you're not talking to him anymore. And to the some girls she's saying that you said they're beneath you." Sunbi let's out a sign as she finishes, quickly resorting to playing with her food to avoid saying more.
Anger consumes me in a matter of seconds
How is she going to do that to me?! When I don't know this girl from anywhere and she most definitely doesn't know me. So this is what I get just cause I'm one of the few people the boys hang out with?!
Hana has got the nerve to spread massive lies about me but say nothing to my face! This is unbelievable.
"Thank you for telling me this. Now if you'll excuse me, I've got some issues to address. Don't worry, everything will be calm!" I give Sunbi a bright smile as I dust myself off and press my hands against the table.
Slowly, I rise up from my seat.
I've tried to be calm and I've kept my composure with her numerous times, it looks like Hana really wants to have problems with me. I've let her act the way she has been because what she was saying didn't really affect me, but this is too far. The level of disrespect this girl has shown me, she needs to be put in her place, she can't do all of this to me and think she's gonna get away with it.
As I walk towards her table, people start to stare at me because they know who I'm going towards. I don't look at anybody except her, I've locked on my target, the tension in the room thickens as I get closer.
She doesn't realise that I'm coming for her until her friends see me and stop talking. I stand right behind her, hands clasped together in-front of me, eyes piercing into the back of her head.
"Hana. I know you have issues with me. I know you don't like me for some stupid reason. But can't we just calmly talk it out like normal people?" I'm still trying to be nice in this situation, I'm just trying to do a her a favour and stop her from getting humiliated.
" I'd rather not..." That is all she says, she doesn't even turn around to look me in my eyes. I'm just trying to be nice and sort this out civilly so what's her problem now? She's already getting me angry.
"Get the fuck up and look at me stupid bitch!" The rage inside me took over as I slam my hand on her table, my brain doesn't even have time to process my words and actions.
The cafeteria quickly is removed off all types of sound; plates being washed, trays dragging along the table, cutlery clashing together, people talking and laughing. All gone.
Hana only turns around to say she doesn't want to. I literally thought it was a joke, until she turns back around to try and continue talking to her friends again. I'm not going to fight her yet, but I'm just gonna grab her attention. I head over to the other side of the cafeteria where the food is, grab a tray from the server, and I bring it back to her table and slam it down right next to her.
Jolting in surprise, she finally decides to do as I say and gets up. Just looking at her face disgusts me, how can one person be so rude and disrespectful?
"And who do you think you are?! Why are you trying to act like I owe you anything , please just fuck off Jiyeon!" Just hearing the way she speaks in an argument tells me everything.
She's one of those girls who never want to fight but want to keep talking. Always searching for drama but will do anything to stop it getting physical. That's what makes me go into psycho mode.
"Don't tell me to "fuck off"! Hana, you're only acting like this because we have an audience. You're such an entertainer, you don't do anything for yourself. To make yourself relevant in this place you have spread the biggest lies. Come on now, trying to say I tried to have sex with Heeseung!"
I'm guessing this is a new rumour that she's started cause I hear a lot of gasps when I say it. I hear people whisper and giggle. I hear Sunoo and Jungwon ask him if it's true, he quickly says no.
Now I want to get angry, I want her to pop off. If I make it seem like she can rant all she wants, she gonna mess up somewhere and says something completely stupid, and that's when I will get her.
" It's not a lie when it's the truth. All of the boys have passed you around, do you not have shame?" She laughs obnoxiously loud as she continues hitting every last nerve in my body.
" You don't know anything." I take a step closer to her, closing the distance between us until we're face to face. My body is tense, it's burning with the desire to hit her.
Not yet.
" How about your aunt? I wonder how she feels having to look after the mess of a girl that was left by her parents, how would she feel if she heard this too! If I was her I would've left you t-"
Anger rushes though my body instantly, and I punch her square in the jaw! She really has the nerve to talk about my family like she knows everything?
As my fist connects with her face, she stumbles and almost falls over. The entire room falls into a chaotic frenzy, everyone's yelling and jumping on tables and seats to get a good view. She tried to swing at me but she still hasn't regained her balance and misses, this seems to fuel her anger.
Before she has the chance to swing again, I let my elbow connect with her nose. I hear it crack a little much gives me a lot of satisfaction. What comes next is a rapid fire of my fists connecting with skin. I would say our fists, but none of her hits are connecting.
People start getting wild and begin barging into us, moving us closer together. Hana finally gets her chance and she grabs a massive chunk of my hair and starts viciously bashing my scalp.
I start going ballistic.
I find space to punch her in the face and she stumbles back again. This opens up an area so I punch her in her stomach which makes her release her tight grip on my hair. I run up to her, pick her up and throw her onto the ground.
I get on top of her and start slamming her head into the ground and punch her. Won't there be a lot of blood? Well I really hope there is! But do I care? I bet you're wondering why, but the reason is simple. If someone touches my hair, I'm going to go crazy and I'm not going to stop.
I don't care about people feelings and the pain they're feeling when I fight. After a minute, I feel many pairs of strong hands trying to pull me off her, probably because they've seen blood. They finally pull me off, but not before I kick her in the stomach one more time.
I'm dragged to the opposite side of the cafeteria, and I realise that it's Jake that pulled me off her.
"Jiyeon. Chill the fuck out! She's not worth your time." His words just go in one ear and out the other. Why should I listen to him? I have no reason to take in anything that he's saying to me.
I pretend like I understand to make him calm down, so that he can let me go cause I'm not finished.
People must really think I'm the dangerous one cause I look over Jake's shoulders and I see no one restraining Hana. She just has people helping her up off the floor, she's not even that injured they're just over exaggerating it. Before I can get more annoyed, Jake grabs me by the hand and tries to lead me out of the cafeteria
The way the cafeteria is laid out is that the exit is in the middle of the room, but a little more to the side Hana is on. So we have to walk and then turn left, walk forwards and the door is there.
I comply and we reach the middle of the room, Jake starts to turn left, and she starts to charge at me like a crazy person.
Obviously I'm going to defend myself and I start fighting her again. I must have been winning cause I feel another pair of hands trying to punch me. Not even shocked, I was waiting for one of her little friends to jump in.
Sunbi wasn't going to let that happen, so she ends up involving herself in the fight to stop the other girl from hitting me. It's not long before the cafeteria is in a chaotic frenzy of people fighting. Boys start fighting because they're were accidentally shoved, girls who are on my side get involved and the same for Hana.
I ignore all of it when I see that I've gotten Hana into the floor. I quickly go ontop of her and start punching her, and punching her, and punching her. Not giving her even a second to breathe as I keep going, I want to stop but my body won't let me, all I see is red.
As I keep hitting her my vision starts getting warped, scenes flashing before my eyes to me punching Hana to me punching somebody else. The anger and rage is all the same but a different face, the other girl looks familiar but I can't place a finger on it. The girls face gets bloodier and bloodier, and I see the same on Hana's face. What is going on and why can't I stop?!
"What the fuck Jiyeon!" I'm suddenly grabbed by a large pair of hangs and dragged of of the cafeteria. Everything is a blur I can hardly see.
I'm dragged until I'm on the opposite side of the school, the emptiest part, when I'm flung into a wall so hard that I'm winded.
Once I finally regain my breath and sight, I look up to see a very furious looking Heesung in front of me. Of course, the man of the hour finally decides to involve himself. I feel the anger boil inside me again; anger from how he's been acting, anger from the fact this entire fight is partly his fault.
He tried to check on me to see if I'm okay and I just shrug him off, looking for my school bagZ
"I'm fine leave me alone." I push him away from me as I grab my bag from his side, turning around to head outside.
Before I can get any further he grabs me by my waist and pulls my into him, my back pressed against his chest. He leans down to the side of my ear, his rough and musky sent consuming me.
"Why are you pushing me away?" His voice is shocking sincere yet surprising filled with anger as he hold me tighter against him.
It only makes me that much more angrier. I'm not the one that needs to apologise to him, he's the one that has been keeping his distance from me. This whole issue between us could've been solved a long time ago but her chose to not settle things, that's not on me. He's been perfectly fine with me not being around him, so why does he care now?!
I grab my hands around his arms and rip the off me, spinning around and slapping him in the face. I didn't even mean to, all of my pent up frustration towards him just took over. And that doesn't stop me as I continue pushing and shoving him as I yell.
"You're the one that's been pushing me away!Why the fuck do you care?" Heeseung doesn't try to fight back, he stares at me angry but defeated as I keep attacking him.
Then suddenly, he grabs me by the arm.
"Why wouldn't I care Jiyeon?! Can't you see that all I do is is care about you?!" His face is filled with frustration and care, but I refuse to believe it's genuine. None of this makes sense, I keep trying to wrap me head around it but I'm getting nothing.
So is he trying to tell me that by ignoring me, that he's caring about me, I must be delusional. Nothing he does shows me that he cares about me, if anything it just shows me that he really hates my guts.
He tries to get me to sit down in an empty classroom but I refuse to move. He isn't allowed to tell me what to do or make me do anything, he has no authority in my life to do that.
"So arguing with me, ignoring me, acting like a child is your version of caring?" I laugh as I glare at him. He can't be serious.
Everything that he's said doesn't make any sort of sense, you care but you ignore me. How does he expect me to understand him when he keeps saying things that don't match up with his actions?!
He quickly grabs me by my face roughly as he towers over me, his eyes glistening with a will to restrain.
"Because I want you! I want you so bad and it hurts because I know I shouldn't, and yet every time I try to let you go I keep coming back!" He quickly goes silent after he finishes yelling at me, letting go of me and running his hands roughly through his hair.
I just stare at him in shock. What did he just say? He wants me? Why does he need to stay away from me? My mind in swirling with too many thoughts it's too much to handle.
I try to open my mouth but nothing comes out. We stare at each other, breathing heavily as the space around us feels like it's getting tighter and tighter.
Before I can even register anything, he shakes his head and turns around, leaving me stood in the hallway lost and confused.