TW!: another long chapter😂
Love Always Wins... Right?
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It was lunch now and I made my way to Alex's class. I asked someone where he was right now, that's how I was able to find him. I found him walking out of the classroom with his blue bag hung over one shoulder. He looked amazing. I even saw a few girls simp over him to which he shyly smiled at.
He caught me in the corner of his eye and immideatly made his way to me, a look of excitement on his face.
"Quite the girls you got simping over you." I joked while he laughed in reply.
"Yeah uhm... I guess I get the attention not alot of people do." He nervously chuckled.
It got quiet between the two of us. Awkward quiet.
I took a deep breath in and exhaled again as I opened my mouth to speak.
"Look... I'm sorry for being rude to you before and ignoring you and what more." I apologized sincerely.
"All good." He shrugged asif it wasn't a problem at all.
"I just need to know something.." I hesitantly trailed off, asking him for permission to continue.
"Go ahead. The stage is yours." He joked, making me giggle a little. He stared at me in awe. I could see it.
I stopped as soon as I noticed and cleared my throat.
"Do you perhaps... like me?" I carefully questioned. It made me nervous to know the answer.
He sighed and looked at the floor. The hall around us was empty now.
"I-...I do." He admitted with a small nod before looking back up at me with a shy smile.
I frowned at his reply. Now came the part where you break their heart, something I was not good at.
"Do you, maybe, feel the same?" He asked as his voice got higher by every word.
I opened my mouth but closed it again. I tried to find the words that would let him down gently.
"I'm sorry." Was all I could come up with as I shook my head. I saw the dissapoint in his eyes. He felt hurt. I didn't even mean to let that happen. I hoped for this to go differently.
"I don't know how to make it up to you, you found my bracelet and here I am, rejecting you in return." I spoke my mind truthfully.
"You can... Come with me on a date?" He hesitantly asked.
"Alex, I-"
"A friend one." He quickly chirped in with a stoic face.
"Please?" He softly muttered out.
I thought long and hard about it. Should I? It's the least I can do to make it up to him.
"Fine." I sighed. He immideatly smiled in victory.
"Thanks!" With that, he kissed my cheek and happily walked away.
I frowned at his retreating figure and wiped the spot he kissed me with my hand. He didn't get the hint, did he?
I went to the cafeteria and sat at the empty table again. I finally mustered up enough courage to eat the food my brother packed in for me. Of course I was sad as I did. It just somehow reminded me of that smirk Nolan always had on when he knew he scored a point.
I sighed as I chewed on my food, eating in thought.
Would he have still been here if we didn't go to that stupid date? Is he okay now? What if I forget him? Should I go visit? But what if I break?
Every thought, every question stayed a mystery.
But it can't just end like this...
Love always wins.
Right?
I sigh miserably. My hope was slowly leaving me by every passing day. I could feel it. But somehow, today was a little different. I had a moment of hope as I stared at the photo of me and Nolan.
He would come back, right?
"Yo, Iris." A voice echoed my ears.
I looked up and saw a smirking Denis next to a stoic Louis.
"Hey guys. What's up?" I chuckled lightly.
They both sat down infront of me and soon Amber joined the party too as soon as she noticed.
"Are we finally sitting together again?" Amber excitedly asked, eating her tray of food.
"Uhm... I never said we shouldn't?" I frowned in confusion.
"Yeah but you ditched our table so we kind of assumed... you wanted to be alone." Denis shrugged with a pout.
"I didn't really mind. I just... I don't know. I just sat here for some reason." I shrugged.
Then it hit me, this was the table where me, Amber and Adeline would sit and Nolan came to tease me. It saddened me at the memory but I kept a stoic face and slowly ate my food.
"Stop." Louis finally spoke, his voice stern and dominant.
I looked up at him in confusion, eyeing the others before looking back at him.
"Me?" I asked, confused.
"Yes. You." He replied obliviously.
"Why?" I tilted my head slightly to the side.
"You keep dealing with everything on your own. You haven't spoken to anyone after what happened. We all know you loved him, Iris. So stop dealing with it on your own. You can't bottle everything up, it doesn't work like that." Louis sternly spat out the facts but it only made me angry for some odd reason.
"I don't have anything to deal with. I'm doing just fine, thank you." I retorted a little furiously.
"Just fine? Really? Anyone can see you're not doing 'fine'! Everyone of us are mourning, Iris! We aren't that stupid to believe you out of all people aren't. You keep this up and the next thing you know, you end up committing suicide! We already lost one... We can't loose you too." He sighed sadly at the end. I knew what he said was true.
There were days I felt so depressed that I wished I could just die. In fact, I truly was already killing myself. Not only by keeping everything to myself but harming myself.
"You speak as if there is no hope...Why have you all just given up? Don't you have hope? He was your best friend for years. Out of all people, you're the one who should have the most hope!" I asked in disbelief as tears formed in my eyes.
Amber and Denis just stared at us in utter pain and sympathy.
"This is reality, Iris! This isn't some fairytale where the prince kisses the princess and she just magically wakes up from her forever sleep! In our case, it's Nolan. Wake up! Let go of him..." He retorts back harshly but ends his statement softly as his eyes also softens.
"I am awake! And maybe, just maybe, holding on is the only way for me to cope! It kills me everyday to wake up and know he is not there to spill his silly jokes and tease me like he always did! So maybe I am doing just fine!" I whisper yell sothat no one around us can hear.
"I admit... I'm sad. I'm heartbroken. But thinking about him just makes me feel a little better than I was a second before." I continued softly, tears started rolling down my face.
Louis stared at me, gobsmacked. He didn't know what to do.
"But thank you for worrying. I'll be off now." I shrugged, wiping my tears as I grab everything and start to walk away.
This wasn't fair. Nothing about it was fair.
They were his friends. Best friends. They knew him longer than I did. But it seemed as though I was the only one who knew how strong he was. He would come back, right? He always does.