Disclaimer: Buffy the Vampire Slayer and all its characters belong to Joss Whedon. I just like to borrow them sometimes :D
It was an important night. The trainee slayers were supposed to have finished the decorations by midnight. Frustratingly enough, it was five minutes to midnight now and the banner was still not ready. Not to mention that Dawn was still labouring over the cake.
Willow, who had finished cooking hours ago, was yelling out instructions, while Xander and Giles were trying to fix up the party lights.
"Hurry up, will you?"
Xander took a deep breath and turned around to look down at Giles. With a raised eyebrow he spoke, "Well G- man, how about you stop whining and start helping, huh?"
Giles flushed and coughed out a reply... "I would if this bloody spondylitis had allowed me to tilt my head up, or to move it at all for that matter."
"Aww... poor Rupert," Spike came walking down the hall, sipping his hot cocoa. "Can't handle your age mate?"
"Spike, quit bothering Giles?" Dawn chided.
"If you say so niblet." Spike said good-naturedly.
"Quit calling my wife that!" Xander yelled from on top of the ladder.
"Why, afraid I will take a nibble out of her?"
Dawn looked disturbed, while Xander launched himself at Spike, forgetting that he was a few feet off the floor and wrapped up with wiring.
"What on earth is going on here?"
The entire gang turned to look at Faith, who was standing at the door holding a stake, and a pissed off expression on her face.
Xander, who had landed on top of Spike, tried to get up; only to trip on the lights scattered on the floor, and fell on Spike again.
An unsavoury cockney curse was heard as Spike and Xander started a tumble on the floor.
"Separate" Willow screamed.
A strong force pushed Spike and Xander onto opposite sides of the huge entrance hall.
"Aren't you guys getting a bit too old for this?" Willow asked.
Faith muttered something about old dogs and new tricks, to which Dawn silently agreed.
"He started it." Xander defended himself.
Giles sighed heavily and gave his head an inward shake. After all these years one would think that these kids would grow up. Surely the thirties is an acceptable age for that?
"Now wait a bloody minute!" Spike protested. "All I did was call Dawn nibblet." He pointed out. "Something I have been doing since before you both decided to get all mushy."
"Alright guys" Faith interjected before the two could start again. "How about we stop arguing over this bullshit and concentrate on what we are supposed to do."
"Right", Xander nodded. "Buff's birthday... decorations before midnight."
"That's what I don't understand." Susan, a recent slayer put up the last of the streamers and frowned. "Why do we have to be ready before midnight?"
"Because that's when her birthday begins dumbass." Kennedy retorted.
"I know that" Susan scoffed. "What I mean is... Buffy is never home on the night before her birthday. Every year Buffy is categorically unavailable on this night. But we still prepare for it from the night before, even though we know that she won't be back before daybreak."
"Not to mention the fact that after a decade of the same surprise, this has become a bit redundant." Kennedy thought out loud.
"Its tradition" Xander explained. "We have been celebrating Buffy's birthday parties ever since we have known her.
"And if we don't plan a surprise then she wouldn't let us do anything, so..." Dawn shrugged.
"Then why disappear for the entire night if she knows that we have a surprise party planned." Susan asked.
"Probably because she wants to keep the troubles at bay." Xander sighed.
"Cliff notes version." Dawn sighed. "Until recently, ever since her seventeenth birthday, disaster has struck on this day each year on this night."
"Disaster might be an understatement." Xander mumbled.
"Any ways," Willow spoke up. "I guess Buffy stays away on this night so that trouble can't find her."
"Then why throw the party." Kennedy wondered.
"Because sweetie, the world would be a terrible place to live in if Buffy hadn't been born." Willow smiled. "And we never want to forget that."
"I still would like to know what she does on this night every year." Susan said.
Buffy was leaning against a tombstone as she looked up to the sky. It was a clear night and Buffy felt like she could see each and every star in the universe. Smiling to herself she placed her stake beside her on her blue blanket and made herself comfortable. She liked Ireland. It was nice. She liked the old buildings, the green fields, and the blue sky, which often hid behind thick fluffy clouds. She did not think she would, but she did. Most of all she loved the sense of completion she got here.
Yes, coming here and making Galway the slayer headquarters was definitely a wise decision. Even her friends agreed. Giles liked it as it was close to his motherland. Willow claimed it got her closer to mature and strengthened her magic. Dawn and Xander seemed happy in the stone cottage they had decided to settle in, inside the castle grounds. Faith and Spike who were in charge of the watcher's council in London, could always come for a quick visits and the slayer trainees loved the empty space for practice. All in all every one was happy. Buffy was too, most of the days anyways.
Pulling out her cell phone Buffy checked the time.
12: 04 AM
He should have been here by now. Buffy frowned as she sat up and scanned the cemetery. Angel was never late, especially on this night. Biting her lip, she slumped back down, and decided to wait some more.
Bored soon, Buffy crawled over to the picnic basket and started to lay out the goodies.
Pulling out a jar of peanut butter and a few chocolate bars, she looked around sneakily before deciding to have a small taste. Savouring the goodness of chocolate covered in peanut butter and the memories she associated with it, she dreamily took out some sandwiches. Lastly she took out a handy icebox and took out a bucket of cookie dough fudge mint chip ice cream from it.
"Perfect" Buffy whispered before she hit her forehead. "Forgot the most important thing."
She put her hand inside the icebox once again and carefully took out a bottle filled with a red liquid.
"Fresh from the butcher's"
Buffy rubbed her hands in excitement.
As she waited for the already late Angel, Buffy remembered her nineteenth birthday. She had come back after the debacle with Ethan which had ended with her stabbing Giles.
Bidding Riley goodnight she had gone to bed; feeling restless as usual she had decided to go for a stroll to cool off. Some how, along the way, she had found herself standing in front of the Crawford's mansion.
Walking up to the gates, which were slightly open, she slipped past them.
As she stepped closer she felt a familiar tingle down her spine.
Closing her eyes she sighed. It couldn't be.
"Buffy"
Buffy jerked around towards the voice.
"Angel"
He was standing there next to the dried up fountain looking his usual immaculate self. Buffy soaked him up like a dried up flower getting its first drop of rain, her fingers itching to reach out to him, and to never let go.
"I didn't expect to see you here." Angel said, a bit off kilter.
Now composed, Buffy folded her arms on her chest. "I could say the same thing of you."
"I..." Angel fumbled.
"You what" Buffy asked, letting out all the pent up frustration and anger she had been accumulating since there last meeting. "Thought you could just come here and spy on me again. See how poor little Buffy is doing without her big bad vampire."
"What no?" Angel said, taken aback. "It's your birthday and I..."
"Thought you could ruin it all over again." Buffy raised a brow.
"You know what, I am sorry, this was obviously a mistake." Angel flung out his hands and turned to leave.
Not done yet, Buffy ran to him and clasped his shirt to pull him to a stop.
"You are right, you shouldn't have come here." She said harshly. "After all I should move on to greener pastures, right? You know move on to someone who can give me picnics in daylight. But Angel, I can't do that if you keep showing up. I am here trying to forget like you wanted and..."
"Like I wanted" Angel turned around and asked in a clipped voice. "If I remember correctly, it was you who had said that we should try and forget each other."
"Because its what you wanted." Buffy pushed at him. "You are the one who wanted me to forget you, to forget everything thing we had could have had. You are the one who gave it all up to be a hero once again, and so I am trying and I..."
Firm but gentle hands gripped her shoulders. Buffy looked up to Angel with a gasp as he brought her closer.
"What are you talking about?" Angel asked in a hoarse voice.
"What" Buffy asked, feeling confused, as her mind was still focused on the fact that one more step and his lips would touch hers.
"When you said... I gave up everything and tried to make you forget." Angel repeated.
Buffy bit her lip and looked into his eyes. She knew she shouldn't and she would probably go to hell for this, but she needed him to know.
"I promised you I would never forget."
Angel sucked in a breath.
"How..." Angel choked. "The powers said..."
"Angel" Buffy said softly. "Since when have I followed the rules?"
Angel's heart clenched. "I am so sorry... I"
"Shhh... Don't be" Buffy placed a finger on his lips. "It was the best day of my life. I am glad I will be able to treasure it for the rest of my life."
"I did what I thought was the best." Angel mumbled helplessly.
"I know." Buffy gave a watery smile.
Angel looked down at the ground not sure what else there was to say.
"Angel."
"You are seeing someone." Angel let out suddenly.
"Huh" Buffy frowned. "Oh, umm... yeah I... how do you know."
"I can smell him on you."
Buffy wrinkled her nose at that. "Yes well... I"
"Is he good to you?" He asked.
Buffy gave him a strange look. "Uh huh"
"Good" Angel nodded. "That's good."
"It's what you wanted Angel" Buffy reminded him sadly.
"I know" Angel accepted. "I still do. You deserve to be happy Buffy."
"I was happy with you."
Angel smiled. "It wasn't meant to be. I would have taken away your light, sucked you in the darkness."
"Maybe that's where I belong." Buffy insisted.
"Don't ever say that." Angel said sharply.
"He isn't you Angel." Buffy whispered. "He will never be you. No one ever will."
"Hey" Angel shushed her as he raised his palm to trace her face. "You don't know that."
"Yes I do."
Angel pulled her to him and crushed her to his chest. Buffy finally let it go and broke down into sobs. "I love you Angel, so much, and its so hard, God why is it so hard."
Angel cradled her head on top of his dead heart and buried his nose into her hair. "Shh its okay, it's going to be okay, I promise."
That night, Buffy finally understood that no matter what, she would never truly forget him. And Angel realized that a selfish part of him didn't want her to. They both also knew that it didn't mean that they should be together. They couldn't be together... no matter what. So they walked away and stayed away. They built their own lives and fought their own battles. But each year, on night before her birthday they met. For one night they forgot who they were and the duties they had and became just Buffy and Angel, two people in love.
12: 25 AM.
Okay! Something was definitely wrong. Getting worried she frowned as she tried to decide what to do. Angel would be all right wouldn't he? After all he was the scourge of Europe. Surely he could take care of himself.
Buffy nodded confidently but grimaced again as her stomach clenched in worry.
"This is no good." Buffy mumbled. Letting out a sigh she dialed a number she never had to dial before.
The phone rang for a few seconds before the automated message announced that the number was busy. Tapping her foot impatiently, she muttered an unmentionable word. The cell phone beeped
One unseen message - Angel
Opening her inbox, she read the message
"Sorry can't make it. Something came up"
Two sentences which broke her heart all over again.
He was not coming. After all these years, he was not coming. But then again, all good things must come to an end. Last year itself, Angel had been distant, as he talked about how hopeless it was, and, about how they should stop.
"You need to let me go."
"As soon as you let me go." She had replied flippantly.
Angel had given her a frugal smile, as he pressed his lips to her forehead.
"Maybe he is letting me go."
With a swift movement of her arm, she pulled away the checkered blanket, letting her midnight picnic scatter on the ground.
Spike and Faith were arguing on the best way to decapitate a Morghul demon, when one of the trainees came running in.
"She is here... she is here."
"Who?" Dawn asked.
"Buffy" The young girls said breathlessly.
"Now" Willow sounded confused, and with good reason. Buffy shouldn't have come home this early.
"Crap, Wills is the cake ready to go?"
"Huh" Willow, came out her thoughts. "Um... cake, yeah, its good to go."
"Okay guys, positions." Xander yelled, as he stood beside the door.
The entire group went to their positions and Giles switched off the lights.
As she walked in quietly through the door, her heart heavy, her mind swirling with questions; Buffy was suddenly bombarded with balloons and confetti.
"Happy birthday" The mottled group of heroes, ex villains and heroes to-be's flooded towards Buffy as they engulfed her in hugs, kisses and cheers of wishes.
"HAPPY THIRTIETH!!!" Dawn screamed and hopped up to Buffy.
Buffy laughed despite herself, Dawn's infectious excitement seeping through her.
"Thanks you guys" she said sincerely as she tried to get hold of the enormous stuff toy Spike had pushed on her. "Really, this is great."
"Yeah well, Willow was gonna do some cool Witchy bouncing lights and flowers thing, but you showed up early." Xander shrugged.
"Yeah, what happened?" Kennedy asked. "Normally you are not back until Dawn on your birthdays. No pun intended."
Buffy went silent for a moment, while Willow, discretely poked at Kennedy.
"I guess I thought that it was time to let go of the old." Buffy nodded and then smiled. "Yes that is it. My new motto... out with the old and in with the new."
"You sure about that" Willow frowned.
"Of course she is." Dawn squealed, as she clapped her hands together with glee. "Out with the old and in with the new. You know what that means!!!"
"I do" Buffy asked amused.
"Birthday shopping!!!"
"Faith shuddered as she remembered the last time Dawn forced her to go shopping with her. Oh well, she shrugged. Better Buffy that me.
"I think I should take it one step at a..."
No no no, you are not backing out."
"Buffy looked doubtful."
"Oh come on slayer." Spike urged her on. Too scared to take on a little shopping."
"Spike, there is nothing little about shopping with Dawn." Faith reminded him.
"I guess that's true." Spike agreed. "Remember the time where they had to kick us out of that shoe store for knocking down the entire stall."
"I was trying to reach the diamante pumps. They were kept too high." Dawn mumbled and tucked her head into Xander's shoulder.
Buffy finally cut the cake in the shape of a vampires face with the stake shaped knife, and Willow cooked up a little magical recantation of all their achievements till date.
Stuffed full of cake, champagne and all other goodies, Buffy finally stumbled into her room at around five in the morning. Putting all her gifts down next to the door she hopped on to her bed and settled in with Mr. Gordo.
Buffy was halfway to slumber land when a familiar sensation washed over her. Blinking her eyes open, she sat up on her bed.
"Angel" Buffy whispered looking around.
No answer.
Buffy focused again, trying to hone her senses like Giles had asked her to, a long time ago.
Something was wrong. It felt like Angel, yes it most certainly did, but it was different, somehow the feeling was not quite the same.
She grabbed her stake and quietly stood up.
"Angel, is it you?" Buffy tried again.
Suddenly she felt a pair of hands grab at her waist. Buffy gasped as she was pulled back into contact with a familiar body.
"Its really you." She said in wonder.
"Hmm... How is it you always know when I'm near?" Angel asked from behind her.
Buffy kept silent, still not believing he was here, not after she had given up hope.
"Sorry, I kept you waiting." He apologized in a sincere voice, as he tugged her even closer. He was late, and he had truly left her hanging; but with good reason.
"I thought you had finally grown tired of us." Buffy finally said in a small voice.
"Never" Angel brought his face down to her shoulder to shift Buffy's hair from her back with his nose, and gently placed a kiss on her exposed nape.
"I will always be with you Buffy. Forever... that's the whole point."
Buffy sniffed and tried to turn around but was stopped.
"Don't move" Angel said to her ear before kissing it softly. He trailed his lip down the said ear and over the earlobe, which he bit gently.
Buffy shivered.
"Close your eyes." He whispered.
Buffy stilled for a moment.
"Trust me." Angel asked as his thumbs ran slight circles over her belly.
Buffy nodded and closed her eyes.
"What am I..."
"Shh... No talking." Angel said. "Just feel."
Buffy gave a rueful pout, but did as he asked. After all it was no hardship. She could stay the way they were forever, losing herself to her senses. She could feel Angel's scent surrounding her. His big body wrapped up around her, as if protecting her from the world and its woes.
He was soft and hard at the same time, his hands now making its way up her waist from underneath her shirt.
She leaned back further as Angel's warm hand caressed her. Placing her head on Angel's chest she tilted it to rub her cheek against his soft silk shirt. Feeling content she stilled on top of his beating heart.
Buffy opened her eyes with a start.
"A...Angel" She said weakly.
Angel gently turned Buffy's now stiff body so that she was facing him.
"Look at me"
Buffy shook her head vigorously. This was a dream, it had to be and if she looked up, maybe the dream would break, and she didn't want it to break.
"Buffy" Angel commanded.
Buffy slowly tilted her head and met his eyes. Her own filled with both hope and dread.
Angel watched her and then silently took her hand and placed it over his heart.
"H...how?" Buffy asked through her tears, which where now falling freely.
"Shanshu"
"No" Buffy insisted, "You signed it away."
"Guess the powers finally gave us a break." Angel gave a weak smile. "That's why I am late." He explained. "I needed to know what happened."
"Is it, you won't give it away this time?" Buffy asked as she clenched Angel's shirt.
"No, I promise."
Buffy's lower lip wobbled.
"I'm scared Angel."
"I know... I am too." Angel confessed.
Buffy took her hand away and looked at the floor.
"Do you think, maybe we should you know... wait?" She said while chewing on her bottom lip. "Cuz you know, the last time we didn't and..."
Buffy was stopped as Angel swooped down and crashed his lips on hers.
"No waiting... ever again" He groaned as he bit her bottom lip.
Buffy gasped and Angel took advantage, slipping his tongue in between her soft lips. Buffy moaned, forgetting all her worries and concerns. She pulled up her hands and weaved them into his thick hair. Cleaving herself into him, she silently vowed never to let him go again.
This time Buffy would not choose the world over him. This time she would not let others drag him away from her, this time she would not let him sacrifice their love because he feels like she deserves better. From now on Buffy would choose him, even if the world went to hell.
Angel roved his hands over her front and tugged at the shirt to rip it open. Palming one supple breast he gave a gentle squeeze before letting it go.
Buffy moaned out a protest and tried to put his hand back on herself, but stopped when she noticed he was trying to get rid of his own shirt.
Helping him pull the sleeves down his shoulders, she peppered Angel's skin with kisses, starting from his belly button. Reaching his brown nipple, she gave it a small lick before biting down on it.
Angel growled.
Buffy giggled as the sound sounded different, now that he was human.
"Think I am funny do you?" Angel tried to sound terse. "I will show you wench!" He placed one hand behind her knee and pulled her up into his arms.
Picking up a stunned Buffy, he carried her to the bed and threw her on it without ceremony.
Buffy looked up at Angel with eyes brimming with happiness and desire. Unbuckling his pants, Angel slid down on top of Buffy. Balancing himself on his arms, careful not to crush her, Angel covered Buffy's lithe body with his own.
Hours later Buffy woke up to Angel trailing kisses up her stomach. Reaching her face, he hovered over her.
"It's morning," Angel said in a light voice.
"You are still here." Buffy said softly.
"I will always be here."
Angel kissed her forehead and rolled back on the bed. Pulling Buffy up to him, he tucked her head under his chin.
Buffy sighed in contentment.
"Your friends are up and running." Angel informed her.
"Mmm... hmm" Buffy nodded. "They will be in for one hell of a surprise."
Angel laughed. "That reminds me." He said.
"What?"
"Happy birthday."
As Buffy closed her eyes again, she smiled.