Emperor 1:
Naofumi: "Yikes! A huge spider!"
Naofumi yelled out and it looks like he is about to cry again.
Typical crybaby.
Issei: "Oh man, gross!"
Issei, my childhood friend, added.
Come on man! I get it, but don't say that out loud.
It makes you look lame, if you're lame, I will seem lame for hanging out with you!
"Grab the broom, I'm gonna crush it!"
I, Kengo Natsume, decided to take charge of the situation, which will surely make me seem cool, heroic and manly.
Since even Wakaba has stopped reading her book to look at what's going on, this is an especially important moment for me to catch her attention.
???: "Wait a minute, boys!"
Someone else shouted.
What?
Oka, our homeroom teacher, rushed over to step between me and the spider.
Oka: "Even this little insect has a soul. It would be cruel to kill it, y'know?"
She added.
"Oh, come on!"
I complained, it's just a spider!
Oka: "Listen to me, okay? A spider is a good bug, y'know? They eat the other bad bugs. Besides, look at how cute they are."
Oka explained.
"Cute? Yeah, right."
I complained, but I don't actually have a good comeback against the actual argument earlier and lower the broom in my hand.
Oka: "None of you better kill the poor thing either, okay?"
Oka added, addressing everyone else in the classroom.
"Yeah, yeah. Isn't that nice?"
I responded sarcastically.
My chance to be the hero has been ruined and Oka is making me seem like the villain here.
And all in front of Wakaba too.
Ugh...
Oka: "Live your life to the fullest too. Okay, little spider?"
Oka addressed the spider.
Seriously? It's just a spider, it's not like it has human emotions!
Spider 4:
???: "Yikes! A huge spider!"
Someone shouted.
Since the situation seems to be so dire, I should be free to break character and look around.
Yep, that's a spider alright.
And the boy who shouted earlier is Crybaby, who is about to cry again.
Not very manly, but I still almost envy his ability to shamelessly express his emotions.
He still gets made fun of, but it doesn't stop him from having friends.
Friends...I want those too, but too much effort and courage needed so nah.
No wait, I actually have friends now somehow.
But do we really count as friends?
Do they see me as a friend? Or just someone they have to put up with?
Sidekick: "Oh man, gross!"
Sidekick added, whose sidekick you ask? Showoff's, that's whose.
It would be one thing if a girl said that, or if you had acted surprised but remained silent.
But with that kind of lameass comment coming from a guy, I suppose that's why he is the sidekick and not the MC.
Not that I would consider Showoff an MC, more like the saturday cartoon villain.
With about as much depth to his character as one.
Showoff: "Grab the broom, I'm gonna crush it!"
Showoff declared, no doubt trying to show off how 'heroic' he is to the class again.
And then brag about to everyone till the cows come home like the annoying idiot he is.
More importantly, F, little spider.
May you find happiness in heaven, or spider heaven if that's a thing.
...Hold up, hang on a minute, something ain't right.
What if this spider is carrying babies?
Then if Showoff crushes it, a swarm of baby spiders will be set loose in the classroom!
And what if they crawl onto me?!
Now that's actually gross and scary! Nai wa!
Okay, this is actually bad, what do I do?!
Inner Critic: Speak up, duh.
As if I would ever do that and break character!
Miss Oka: "Wait a minute, boys!"
Miss Oka spoke up, stepping in between Showoff and the little spider.
Miss Oka: "Even this little insect has a soul. It would be cruel to kill it, you know?"
She added.
Um actually, spiders aren't insects, they are aranaids.
Inner Critic: Shut up, nerd! No one asks for your opinion, Hiiro!
As usual, Miss Oka is kind, far kinder than she is given credit for.
And she just prevented a possible disaster too.
So thank you, Miss Oka.
Showoff: "Oh, come on!"
Showoff tried to protest.
Miss Oka: "Listen to me, okay? A spider is a good bug, you know? They eat the other bad bugs. Besides, look at how cute they are."
Miss Oka explained.
Yeah, most spiders are generally pretty harmless unless provoked.
And eating harmful bugs is a plus.
Showoff: "Cute? Yeah, right."
Really hate to say it, but I have to reluctantly agree with Showoff there.
I don't really find spiders gross, but I certainly won't call them cute either.
The way they skitter about can be pretty creepy at times too.
Jumping spiders can be cute sometimes though, for what it's worth.
But wow, agreeing with Showoff feels so cringe, I wanna hang myself.
Miss Oka: "None of you better kill the poor thing either, okay?"
Miss Oka added, addressing everyone else in the classroom.
Don't worry, I won't, cause I don't want a swarm of baby spiders attacking me.
Showoff: "Yeah, yeah. Isn't that nice?"
Showoff responded sarcastically.
Is he dumb? Well, of course he is.
He is always asking me for help with his homework.
At least Sidekick, Gung-ho and Moonie are there to reel him in when needed.
But Moonie and Gung-ho ain't here right now.
And I don't think the possibility of the spider carrying babies crosses Sidekick's mind either.
Come on my guy! You're supposed to be the lame but level-headed nerd stopping the loud and obnoxious idiot from causing trouble!
Miss Oka: "Live your life to the fullest too. Okay, little spider?"
Miss Oka addressed the little spider.
Seriously, how nice can you be?
Compared to her, everyone else is just pathetically selfish.
Especially me, who would rather do nothing all the time, what a waste of a person.
Inner Critic: You should just save everyone the trouble by offing yourself, Hiiro.