hello my gorgeous lovely people, make sure u comment. u guys make me insanely happy with your commentary
tw - slight mention of rape, abuse and self harm
Chiara's POV
I'm in a car. Ms Berry is driving me in a car to go to the airport. Once I get to that airport, I'll somehow end up on a plane. Then somehow that plane will be in the air (I genuinely don't understand how planes fly but don't tell anyone). Then somehow that plane will land in New York, and I'll be off living with my new family. Because Mum and John are dead.
Mum is dead. Like her heart isn't beating anymore. I'm not going to have to worry about putting her to bed tomorrow night. I'm not going to have to clean her up after she passes out and wets herself in the middle of the kitchen.
And John... Well, I'd rather not talk about the things I'll no longer have to experience now that he's very much dead. I'm not sad that he's dead if I'm being completely honest.
It's dead silent in the car, Ms Berry and I talked a tiny bit. It was mainly about school and my friends, and a bit about her life as well. She could obviously tell I was tired and didn't want to talk, so she let me go off into my own world. I was just happy she didn't ask about my home life.
When we finally arrive at the airport, I can't help but notice Ms Berry makes a wrong turn. From memory, we have to keep driving to the main building, but Ms Berry has started driving us elsewhere.
Shit, am I getting kidnapped? Maybe this is someone else pretending to be Ms Berry. What if it's one of Mum and John's friends?
"Chiara sweetheart, don't stress, I'm not kidnapping you. Your father has just arranged for you to get to New York on a private jet." Ms Berry says softly, probably realising my rising panic. But shit, a private jet! What the fuck is going on? Holy shit. My new family must be rich. Like really rich.
It's honestly such a blur, next thing I know Ms Berry is hugging me whilst they load my singular bag of stuff onto the plane. I think she's telling me to call her if she needs anything, but I honestly don't know. Somehow her card ends up in my hand.
And then suddenly, I'm sitting in this fancy-ass modern jet thing, it looks like something Kim Kardashian would fly around the world in. Wait maybe it is, maybe Kim Kardashian has sat in this exact seat before.
The flight attendant is standing right in front of running me through safety details, whilst also assuring me that I won't need to use them. But I'm not really paying attention to her.
I'm waiting for her to tell me that this is all a joke, then to run out of the plane whilst I'm left in here as it goes up in flames. But now she's gone, telling me that she'll be in the front section of the plane if I need anything. Maybe it'll blow up in a few seconds?
And then I'm floating in a big metal machine, thousands of meters above Sydney Harbour. It looks really pretty up here, but I'm more concerned about the fact that I'm sitting in a fancy private jet. I'm too scared to even touch anything because I know for a fact that I'll probably break it. I'm not sure why the flight attendant left me here alone, I'm probably some sort of risk.
But being up in the air is extremely boring, and we've only been in the air for like ten minutes, but I'm not kidding when I say it feels like 4 hours. I'm not too sure how I'm going to cope for like twenty hours of this.
Plus my phone is dead and I'm too scared to ask for a charger. And the five books I own are in the luggage part under where I'm sitting. So, I decide to make a list of mental promises to myself about my new life;
1. Don't tell anyone about what Mum and John did.
2. Don't let anyone in, keep the walls you've worked so hard to build up.
3. Only let people in enough to keep them satisfied, so they don't feel like you're blocking them out.
4. No serious romantic relationship, everyone sucks.
5. Get out of there as soon as you can.
It honestly makes me cringe whilst thinking of them, but I have no idea what I'm supposed to do right now. I mean, they're probably not the worst rules to attempt to live by, and I don't really know why I made them.
I stick my hand into the carry-on tote bag I brought on with me and start digging around until I find my sleeping tablets. Since I have nothing better to do, I might as well catch up on the sleep I've lost in the past 8 years.
I quickly toss back two of them, and write a note asking the flight attendant not to wake me up until we land. I don't know how long this flight is really going to be, and I don't know if two tablets will even keep me out for that long. But I guess we're about to find out.
⁕⁕⁕⁕⁕
They did keep me asleep, surprisingly. And I don't wake up until the flight attendant slowly starts shaking me awake.
"Miss Bernardi, we've landed and one of your brothers is here to pick you up." The flight attendant says softly, a large smile adorning her face. She should be happy, she got paid to sit around considering all I did was sleep. She basically got paid to do nothing. Lucky.
And it takes me a second to properly process what she just said. She called me Miss Bernardi. It sounds weird, Ms Berry didn't end up telling me my new last name. And I can't figure out why it sounds so familiar.
I quickly start to gather my things from around me. I take a quick peek out of the window to see it was now nighttime. I think I just time travelled, it was still nighttime when we left Australia. What day even is it?
Wait, she said there was someone down there waiting for me. For me. Me lousing around up here just taking my time means I'm keeping someone waiting. And that's not really a first impression I'm willing to have on one of my new brothers. Ew, even just thinking that feels insanely weird. Brothers, gross.
I do a quick once-over of my little area, making sure I haven't left anything behind. There's nothing here, which hopefully means all of my stuff is safely locked up in my tote bag. I take a quick breath, maybe I could make a quick dash out of here? I was a mid-court player in netball, my dodging skills could come to good use when running away from people.
But as I end up at the top of the plane stairs, I quickly realise that the running away idea would be completely impossible. The 6'4 man giant standing at the car in front of me would be able to chase my twiggy legs down in a heartbeat. And the closer I get to him, the more I thank myself for not running away.
This guy is tall, easily 6'4 like I said earlier, much taller than my little 5'2. He obviously works out a lot, filling out the extremely expensive suit easily. And his face is, well, meh. It's familiar, but it's still meh. He's got the same blue eyes as me, which is insanely creepy, and his blonde hair is sitting neatly on his head. But something tells me his hair doesn't look like that normally.
And even though he's fully clothed (thankfully), something tells me he's got tattoos. And I can tell that because the hand that's currently holding my suitcase, is seemingly covered in them. I don't know shit about cars, but something tells me the shiny black one behind him is expensive.
I think my family is rich, and that absolutely terrifies me. The soft smile on this guy's face calms me down somewhat, but I honestly think I could piss myself right now.
"Hey Chiara, I'm your older brother Giacomo. It's so nice to see you again." The guy I now know as Giacomo says warmly as I make my way over to him. I come to a stop a few feet in front of him, and I can tell he wants to hug me. But if he even tries that, I will not hesitate to throat-punch him. I just don't think I'm mentally prepared for that yet.
Instead of verbally responding, I just nod and make this entire situation ten times more awkward than it already is. His expression falters for a second, his warm aura being replaced by a nervous one. But he quickly recovers and opens the passenger side door for me.
"Let's get you home shall we." He says, and I give him a small smile back and quickly slide into the passenger seat. This feels weird, back ho- I mean in Australia, this side was the driver's seat. But here it's the passenger street, this is seriously going to fuck with my head.
Seconds later, Giacomo slides into the driver's seat beside me and turns the car on and quickly starts driving out of the airport. He does all this without even sparing me a glance, and I don't think he does it on purpose. And I honestly don't really care.
Instead of focusing on him, I turn my attention outside the window, looking at the city skyline as we drive past it. It's gorgeous, I've always loved New York City. And I've always dreamt of living here. But I never imagined it actually happening one day, it was always just a dream.
"All the buildings are so so pretty." The words slip from my mouth without me even realising it. I tense up subconsciously, unsure if I'm even allowed to be talking right now. My mind immediately goes into overdrive, thinking of all the shit that could happen now. But a deep chuckle from beside me makes those thoughts pause.
"Well bambina, our family owns a fair amount of them. I'm sure one of us could take you up in them one day." He says, taking his gaze off the road and softly looking at me for a second. I slowly nod, finding more confidence to keep the conversation going.
(little/younger girl)
"Italian?" I softly ask. Mum, well early days Mum, was always very vocal about how we were Italian, and how it was very important to her. It's why she enrolled me in Italian classes at the ripe age of 5. I was fluent in it by the time I was 12.
"Yep, we are very much Italian. And all of us are pretty much fluent in it. If anything Carlo, Bruno, Enzo and Rocco still have a little more to learn. But we speak it a lot at home." He explains.
I think he's expecting me to know who Carlo, Bruno, Enzo and Rocco are. But I have no clue what he's on about.
"Carlo, Bruno, Enzo and Rocco are the youngest four. It goes Agostino, who's Tino for short, then me, Rocco, Bruno and Enzo are twins, and Carlo." He explains. Okay, makes a little more sense but I still don't understand what he's going on about. But I nod like I do.
That's a lot of names. And a lot of men. And a lot of testosterone to be living with. What if they're all like John? I really don't think I'm going to be able to survive that. I barely survived just being with John, I couldn't imagine it multiplied by six.
Giacomo continues, clearly not put off but my silence, "You nervous?" He probably figured that out from the way I'm basically trying to disappear into this car seat, the way I've barely talked, and I probably look terrified as well. Because I am. I'm mentally shitting myself.
"A little." I mumble out, I honestly don't think Giacomo even hears what I say. But when I look at him, he's already looking at me with a weird look on his face. It's almost as if he finds whatever I'm saying amusing.
"I wouldn't say there's anything to be nervous about. The boys are already very excited to see you, and based on the grades I saw Dad looking at, you have nothing to worry about." He says softly, turning his gaze back onto the road.
"Yeah, I know. But like, 6?!" I exclaim, my voice sounding a little squeaky at the end. Just having 6 siblings would be a lot, but 6 brothers make it even worse. Giacomo clearly still finds me amusing, laughing at my exclamation.
"I know, it can be a lot. But they're not usually too bad, it can just get a bit noisy around the house." He explains, then turns to look at me again, "Look, if you're that nervous I can sneak you straight to your room when we get home. Then you don't have to face them until the morning."
"Yes please." Another night to overthink everything that could go wrong sounds perfect right now. A smile makes its way onto Giacomo's face.
"No problem."
⁕⁕⁕⁕⁕
My family is rolling in money. Not even rolling, they're fucking swimming in it.
That's what I figured out last night. It was fairly obvious from the moment Giacomo picked me up in the shiny rich car, but it was confirmed when he had to punch in a code to open the gates to the house. But it's not a house, it's a whole ass mansion.
And then Giacomo snuck me through the house, past the really nice kitchen with real marble countertops, and up the rich-looking stairs. Like, who has stairs that just look rich?
And my brand new room is the size of my lounge room back in Australia, it's fucking massive. I could do a full-on dance routine up here, that is if I could dance. And it is a tad plain at the moment, but Giacomo said that they'd take me shopping to make it look nicer.
But I honestly don't think it needs anything. It's got nice hardwood floorboards, that are on the lighter side. A plain white bed frame with an insanely comfortable mattress that's covered in a white quilt and white sheets. And a small little wooden desk with a black desk chair in the corner of the room. I honestly don't know what else I could need.
And that doesn't even include the ginormous closet. It's gigantic, all of my clothes barely took up three drawers and two coat hangers. There's no way that I'm ever going to fill it all out.
Then there's also the ensuite that I somehow have, and it's the same size as my old bedroom back home. The bathroom is the same size as my old bedroom. And it's a really nice bathroom as well, it honestly looks straight out of Pinterest.
And that's all I was able to snoop around in after Giacomo snuck me into my room, and I eventually took a sleeping tablet and crashed into my extremely comfortable bed. I didn't even know they made mattresses this comfortable.
I'm still laying in said extremely comfortable bed, I woke up a while ago but I've just been lying here. I haven't even rolled over to look at the time, I'm just hoping someone comes and gets me for breakfast. I don't even know if I'm allowed to leave my room.
And clearly, someone can hear my thoughts, because two seconds later there's a soft knock at my door. I should probably respond to that, but I do the opposite and shut my eyes. Maybe this will be less awkward if I just pretend to be asleep.
"Is she awake?" I hear someone ask from the doorway. And it's not a familiar voice, but it sounds young, which means it's probably one of my trillion brothers.
"Keep your voice down Carlo, and go wait in the dining room. We'll be down there in a second," A voice I recognise as Giacomo says, and I connect the other voice to the name Gi said. Carlo. Probably a brother, I have no clue which one but he's definitely one of them.
"But-." Carlo begins but is quickly cut off again by Giacomo.
"Downstairs Carlo. She's not going anywhere, I promise." Gi says, but this time with a much softer tone. I feel like there's more to the story than just that, but I'm busy pretending to be asleep. I manage to hold in the flinch when the light turns on, hiding flinches is actually a good skill of mine.
"Chiara, bambina. It's time to wake up." I hear from beside me, and this time I'm not able to hide the flinch. This dude didn't make a single sound when walking into my room, I thought he was still standing at my door with Carlo or whatever his name was.
(little/younger girl)
I manage to make the flinch look somewhat normal, do some weird tossy-turny thing in my bed and bring my sleeve-covered arms up over my face. I slowly let my eyes open on their own accord and adjust to the bright lighting of my room. Gi's standing at the end of my bed, his blue eyes looking at me.
"Breakfast is ready if you're ready to pop down and meet everyone." He says softly, breaking his gaze away from me. He walks up to one of the windows in my room and pulls them open, letting even more painful light into the room. What if I was a vampire? He would've just killed me.
"Mhm," I mumble, stretching my muscles out. I know I look so hideous right now, and I'm trying not to let the embarrassment show. Wait, that means everyone else will see me looking hideous.
"Can I just have 5 minutes?" I grumble, causing a small smile to spread across his face.
"Yeah, of course. Not too long, I really don't want your breakfast going cold." He says, turning around and heading towards my door, "I'll wait out here for you, okay?" He adds. And when I nod, he disappears out into the hallway.
And when he disappears, I quickly bounce up and out of bed, and into my fancy pancy new ensuite. It sounds really weird to say that. Me and ensuite in the same sentence? I didn't think that would happen until I married a rich AFL player.
I started rummaging through my bathroom drawers in a search for a hairbrush, and once I found it I attempted to tame the birds-nest sitting on my head. I'm in dire need of a haircut, but my favourite lady is back in Australia. And she's extremely expensive. And I don't trust myself enough to do it on my own.
Swiftly grabbing the concealer from where I'd shoved it in my drawers, I covered up the dark circles sitting under my eyes. I was starting to look alive, which is a really good start. They're my brothers and should get used to seeing me like this. No one looks good in the mornings.
Keeping in mind what Gi said about having a cold breakfast, I made my way back out through my room and into the hallway, where I found Gi leaning against the wall whilst on his phone. He clearly heard me open my door, as he looked up from his phone and gave me a big smile.
"You ready to go?" He asks.
"Yes." No. I'm not ready. I honestly don't think I'll ever be ready. But, by the looks of it, I don't really have a choice but to be ready. All I can do is pray that they're nothing like John, or Mum for that matter.
I quickly follow after Gi, following him to what I think will be the dining room. I also try to memorise the turns he's making and the hallways he's walking down. But there's so much going on in my brain right now, I don't think I'll be able to remember it.
And eventually, we stop right in the doorway of the dining room. The dining room with the dining table in it. The dining table that a mixture of 6 men and teenage boys sitting around. All of whom are who I presume to be my new family.
At the head of the table sat an older man, not elderly, just older than me. I think he'd be around Mum and John's age. He has the same blue eyes as me, greyer hair that was neatly styled, and a shorter beard sitting around the bottom of his face. I presume that he's my sperm donor. Or I guess he's my dad now.
To the right of my Dad, there was a guy who looked to be in his early to mid-twenties. He's got the same wavy brown hair as me, it's just styled much shorter and neater. He also seems to have the same blue eyes on me, but those blue eyes weren't looking at me. They were heavily concentrated on the phone in front of him. His sharp jawline was covered in brown scruff, and from what I could see there was a dusting of freckles over his nose.
With a quick glance around the room, I figure that they've also got the same blue eyes as me. Which is insanely creepy and weird.
Next to the brunette is a blonde, who looks to be in his late teens. I honestly don't really know, I'm terrible with ages. But this guy has noticed my entrance and is glaring holes into my face, which is quite lovely. He had dirty blonde hair, much like Gi, but his is a tiny bit longer and much messier.
Before I even had the chance to finish analysing the 3 other boys in the room, Gi cleared his throat from beside me. And within milliseconds, 6 pair of creepily blue eyes that look way too much like mine, were looking at me. And I was praying that I could melt into a puddle.
The older man sitting at the end was the first to do anything, giving me a warm smile and saying, "Chiara my love, why don't you take a seat?" I simply nod in response, sliding into a seat next to the brunette I didn't have an opportunity to analyse.
But now I'm sitting next to him, and he's looking at me with some weird shocked but happy expression on his face. To be fair, I don't know, but I took the opportunity to figure out where on the brother scale he could be.
He honestly looks around my age and looks like the male version of me. He's got same wavy hair, and his is even messy like mine is. His eyes are the same. His face is covered in freckles like mine usually is when I'm not malnourished. Same nose. Same eyebrow shape. But he's got a nicer jawline than me, and it makes me mad.
But then the young brunette realises that I was staring at him, and a gentle flush rose to his cheeks as he quickly focuses his attention back on the plate in front of him. So I decide that now would be the best opportunity to sus out the other two that I missed.
And this task was surprisingly easy, as they were identical twins. They were both blonde, the same nose, the same eyes, same eyebrows. The same everything, it was kind of creepy. The only noticeable differences I found were the styles of hair.
The one on the right's hair was very messy and long, but it looked like he'd been in front of a mirror all morning trying to make it look messy. Then the one on the left had a buzzcut, and it looked like it'd been bleached. Buzzcut also had an eyebrow slit and nose piercing.
"Chiara, Tesoro, can I just say how lovely it is to have you back home with us all. If you didn't figure it out already, I'm your biological dad, Damiano, and the other idiots at the table are your brothers." The older guy, well, my 'dad' starts, but was cut off by a scoff coming from the grumpy blonde across me.
(sweetheart)
"Anyways, whilst I'm sure we all have questions, I'm starving and would really like to eat. So let's do that, shall we? The idiots can introduce themselves whilst we're at it." He says cheerily, shooting the older brunette a look when he finished.
Said older brunette sits up a little straighter in his chair and turns to look at him. A weird look of guilt and sadness washes over his face, but it was gone within seconds and suddenly he was speaking, "I'm Agostino, Tino for short, I'm your oldest brother. I'm 23 and usually at work, you probably won't see me much."
Before I even had a moment to register what Agostino had said or figure out what food all these maids were putting on the table, another voice speaks up, "I'm Gi, well Giacomo but you already know me. I'm 22 years old, making me the second oldest and I'm about to start my first year of surgical residency."
However, I do have time to respond, which I did by simply nodding my head. I also turn my attention to the spread of food that was now sitting in front of me. Different foods like french toast, pancakes, bacon, eggs, literally any breakfast food you could think of. And there's a lot of it.
I remove my gaze from the unnecessary amount of food sitting in front of me, just to find everyone at the table glaring expectantly at the grumpy blonde. He's just staring at the food, and sends a quick glare to Tino.
"Oh vaffanculo, I'll speak. I'm Rocco, 18, leave me the fuck alone." The grump who I now knew was Rocco says. It's also disappointing, I was really looking forward to having tea parties with him.
(fuck off)
"I'm Enzo, 17." It took me like 30 seconds to figure out who even said that, but I think the words came from blonde buzzcut's mouth. I guess not everyone in this family is a big talker?
The other blonde twin simply rolls his eyes at the short statement, before adding "I'm Bruno, and unfortunately I shared a womb with this brontolone, which also makes me 17." with a big, warm smile on his face. Okay, this is good. Maybe not everyone in the house hates me.
(grump)
Then I turn to look at the last one who hadn't talked, the one who looked creepily similar to me and had a better jawline. Not that I'd ever admit that to him, because from experience, boys don't need their egos inflated anymore.
The brunette clears his throat awkwardly and says, "Uh I'm Carlo, I'm 16 and I guess I like ice hockey." the boy says in a whisper. 16? Like in the same age as me? Oh shit. That explains why we look so similar, we're twins. Now I definitely can't tell him he has a better jawline than me,
"16?" I ask hesitantly, not really believing the thoughts running through my mind. Surely I didn't actually have a twin, surely Mum would've told me if I did. Because it's just simply wrong if she didn't.
"Yes Chiara, he's your twin brother."
A/N
hi, sorry it took me so long to get this out. but here u go, hope u enjoyed.
what did you think of it? be brutally honest
lots of love,
tilly xo