She drove the car in the night time. The road was free and near ECR,it doesn't need any explanation. The dim street lights,the silence around,mullai turned on the music system - her favourite Raja sir songs.
Kathir was a bit uncomfortable and sensing that mullai asked"enna da??"
"Illa... hesitantly...romba dhagama iruku..."he told slowly.
"Cha avalodhana... adha open Pannu water bottle irukum..."she told pointing to the front drawer.
Opening it he took the bottle,drank it and while replacing it back he saw some eclair chocolates. Her all time favourite chocolate or snack. With a smile he asked"innum chinna papa maari oru ruba eclair chocolate craze pogala unnaku..."and she looked at him from corner of her eyes.
He continued"unkita oru difference yum illa...adhey siripu...kurumbu thanam...unnaku pudichu Raja sir songs... ellam appadiya Iruku..."
"Dei naa yen maara poren...??"she asked and continued"neeyum appadi dhan Iruka...enna ippo innum smart ah iruka... avalodhan"
His face fall hearing it and he looked away. Mullai saw that and asked"enna achu kathir??"
"Naa orey maari irukara person illa mullai..."he sounded low. Knowing he is sad which mullai didn't like she changed the topic "Situation paathu ellarum change avanga kathir...seri yen driving eppadi iruku"
Kathir turned to her and said"edho paravala...yenna ennoda uyirku dhan guarantee illa..."and she with one hand on steering and used the other to pinch him.
"Eii...valikudhu di..."he whinced and she said"valikathum...eppo achum enna appreciate pannirikiya da nee??" Only those hidden letters and poems he wrote for her know how much she is valued in his life.
Turning her face she drove the car smoothly and in between they talked. They talked about everything their likes, their careers, their choices and what not.
Kathir told how he got the opportunity to pickup bike racing and mullai shared her experience on how she turned as an event manager.
They shared about their difficult times , who helped them ,how much they struggled,their memories, appreciation everything. But neither of them talked about their past. The past that changed their lives.
Mullai really wanted to speak about it but she kept quiet because it's after a long time they both are meeting up and she doesn't want to make it awkward nor disturbed for him. Kathir on the other hand couldn't believe he is with her that moment and all he wants is to cherish it. He didn't want to spoil it by thinking or speaking his bitter times.
After half an hour,kathir asked "mulla late agiduchu... naa kelambaren nee safe ah poidiviya???" And she replied " no problem da..." and they exchanged their phone numbers.Mullai dropped him at the hotel he is staying and she left the place.
Kathir went to his room. Washed his face,loosened his tie and sat on the bed. He met her nearly after 6 years. She was in front of him for almost 3 hours. They talked,they shared everything and she was with him. What more he could ask for??? All these years he felt he wasn't lucky enough for anything but this one meeting even if it was sudden and less he felt so happy.
Her care free attitude,her way of adjusting her hair,her angry cute face and her happy loud laughter he wanted the time to pause for him to feel that again. Slowly his college memories was coming back to him.
The first time he saw, their first meet-up,their first friendships moments,their random talks,their movie review discussion,their first fight.
It is all still fresh in his mind. The time he realised he had feelings for her,the efforts he use to take to propose to her. The time his eyes would admire her, all was coming back to him and slowly tears was forming in his eyes. The day when he was about to open his heart and when it broke down. The difficult painful days he faced after that and the fact he wasn't able to go back to college after that.
Nothing has changed between the way they talk or interact now but what if she is still committed??? What if she is preferring someone else in her life??? He wanted to ask her badly if she is still single but if the reply is no it would hurt him more. After all, he saw one worst moment in front of his eyes and he didn't want to feel that again. This pain of just being with her and not knowing about anything is better for him. He still loves her and these years he was living in her memories. Many a times he tried to contact back his college friends but nothing worked out.
He used to trace about her to know where she is but then knowing about it he would even try making an effort to meet her but then cancel at the last moment. The fear was killing him out.
Yen mulla... ippadi panra...unna pakanum unkita pesanam oru pakkam aana adhey semaiyam unkita sonna nee eppadi eduthupa nu oru bayam....nee vera yaar achum kadhalikara sonna ennala thanga mudiyadhu mulla...inda vaali oru azhagana sugamana vaaali....he cried and that time the door bell rang.
Thinking it to be room service,he asked the person to come in . He wiped his tears and got up and boom.......
It was mullai standing in front of him.
With trembling voice he asked"mulla..nee??"
"Wallet ah car la vittutu vandutha kathir adhan return panlam nu vandhen.. reception la room number keten avanga dhan sonnanga"she showed the wallet to him.
"Thanks"he smiled weakly and tried to move aside when mullai held his hand "kathir?????"
He looked at her and she said"azhudiya da???"
He kept quiet and she asked again"sollu da...."
"Illa.."he lied.
She was getting angry"poi solladha...20 minutes munnadi dhan unna pathen...yen ippo unnoda kan ivalo sevandhu iruku???"
"Onnum illa.. mulla" he told but she didn't leave"kathir please ippadi solladha...i know something is bothering you but adhuku thaniya feel pannadha da...share Pannu...you know right i won't judge you..."
But he remained silent again and she lost her patience. Leaving his hand she stood in front of him "yen da ippadi panra???enna dhan unnoda life la achu nu ippadi azhara... "
"Adhan onnum illa solren la,nee kelambu mulla"he turned but she pulled him back.
"Pogamaten nee sollu appo dhan poven... life full ah secrets vechukithu enna Panna pora???yenda share panna matra??if it's your personal i wouldn't come inside but illana sollu kathir...aanikum appadi dhan enna nu sollama nee college vitu poita...evalo vaati nanga unna contact panna try pannom theriyuma...nanga ellam unnaku important ah therla"
He maintained silence and she spoke again"yengala paathi nee yosika kuda maatiya???aniku nee poita aana nee enga eppadi Iruka theriyama evalo kastam engaluku...seri appo dhan appadi na ippovum nee ippadi Iruka...marupadiyum nee yengala vittutu polam nu irukiya???"
"Answer Pannu kathir"she demanded.
He looked at her and could her eyes reflecting pain, sadness and fear so he decided to open up"aaniku situation appadi agidhuchu mullai...."
He sat on the bed and slowly opened his broken feelings"oru morning hostel room la irukum bodhu veetla irundu call... eppovum pola attend pannen..appo amma azhudhanga..ennanu puriyama irundhen...veetuku vaa seekram ah sonnanga...odaney poiten...anga...."
He controlled himself and said"appa ku heart attack sonnanga....aprom appa....his voice broke...sethutarunu sonnanga ". Hearing that mullai sat beside him and took hold of his hands.
"Appa dhan ellamey ennaku...avaru ponnadhum... business loss achu...anna anni foreign poitanga ... neraiya loan irunduchu...kanna vera 12 th padichuthuridhan...veedu kudumbam kapathanum naa vellaiku poga arambichen...naa oru naal pola naa enga veetla ellarum patini ah irupom avalo kastam... Aprom ellam naa rendu varusham kula seri pannen appo amma enna vittu poitanga mulla...."he cried.
"Aprom yennoda passion ah chase pannen...romba naal kaprom chance kedaichapo ennoda appa amma kaga naa win pannanum work pannen... paithiyam ah hardwork pannen aprom dhan ivalo dhuram Vara mudichu...". They both remained silent. Mullai broke the ice "i am so sorry kathir..."she said holding his hand tightly "nee ivalo face pannanu ennaku theriyadhu...."
"I tried mulla to contact you people but mudila....seri namma friends ellarum eppadi irukanga???"he asked to divert their minds.
"All good kathir... ellarum settle agithanga..."she replied politely.
He wanted to know badly whether she is still in relationship with Karthik but he didn't have the courage to ask. That time mulla gave in a statement "except one person..."
He was puzzled "enna sorla??"
"Ellarum nalla irukanga kathir except one person"she said
"Yaaru??"he asked
"Karthik..."she told slowly.
"Yen?"he didn't understand.
"Because he is no more...."she told sadly while kathir was shocked"what???? Eppadi mulla???"
"Accident...nee oruku pona la... next month Avan college varum bodhu...."she didn't tell further and he understood it.
"Kadaisi varaikum avana pakkama poiten i am not even a good friend.."kathir felt guilt ridden.
"Kathir don't feel bad...it's actually understandable... please..."she patted on his back.
"Illa mulla...i am a loser....fit for nothing...enga appa amma irukum bodhu naa avangaloda time spend pannala... idho Karthik ennoda best friend avan poitan kuda ennaku therla...unga ellarum naa hurt dhan panren..."he felt dejected "nee avana love panna...unnaku evalo kastama irukum... i didn't be with you at that time I am sorry"
"Illa kathir we were just good friends.."she said. He didn't get the point.
"He proposed me...Naanum accept pannen because same batch...good friend...but within a week I was able to figure out we can only be friends nu...so we both understood each other and moved on... just two weeks dhan adhu love ah kuda ennaku therla... but he was a good guy...my best friend and still I miss him..."her voice broke.
After a brief silence, kathir said"you always deserve a good guy...unna yaruku dhan pudikadhu..."
With a small smile she spoke "Arpom kuda Silla per propose pannanga...but i couldn't find the real one kathir... edho anda spark adhu i couldn't feel at all with anyone till date"... And looking at him she said in a flow "i wish someone like you loved me...i would have been the most happiest."
Kathir without thinking just said "but i too loved you......."and mullai couldn't believe what she heard.
"Enna solra kathir??"she questioned.
Kathir after knowing everything now didn't want to lose the chance nor her....all these times the pain was with him and he never opened it up but now whatever it is he wanted to tell atleast the guilt that he had before can erase.
"I have always been in love with you mulla.... college first year lerndhu...unkuda naa spend panna time ellamey is so magical for me...unmela paithiyam ah irundhen...unga kita vandu sollanum irundhen but aaniku dhan Karthik unkita propose pannan and......i felt might be you both were made for each other nu...."he told finally.
Hearing it Mullai got up , went near the big glass window and stood there silently.
TBC