Why now? was the first thought that throbbed in the front of Bernie's head. Four years was an oddly extensive period of time to continue with such bullshit when Holden had so much more income from the flats he owned around here. Of course he could've quit his job earlier, what a joke! No words came to Bernie's mind, instead it was like there was a thick fog hanging over her head and she could've cried right there and then, given the opportunity. "Well, wishing you a prosperous wage packet, Holden. Good day." Before he could even take another breath, she was through her front door with him safely on the other side.
Except not so safely, as he had the key to her flat, being the landlord, so he could come in at any time he wished. Perhaps she'd call a locksmith to change the locks without him being any the wiser. But how would she manage that when he was at home all the time, just next door? She wouldn't, was the simple but less desirable answer.
One week into Queen's stay at Ridge Farm and Bernie had shockingly had quite a peaceful week, with no interference from Holden whatsoever. She'd be relieved if his lack of stalkerish activity wasn't so suspicious. Brian had called a couple of times and told Bernie everything in so much detail that it was like she was there. On the second day, apparently it rained and John chucked a cup full of cold water at Roger after he came inside from having a smoke, proudly bone dry. On the fourth day, the weather cleared and everybody went out to play tennis. Veronica tripped over her own feet, but was luckily caught by Freddie, who then darted inside. Eureka Moment or something like that, Brian had called it. Yesterday, whilst Bernie was shitting herself over both Holden and Flo's news, the rest of Queen and their respective partners were having fun by the poolside.
Basically, to Bernie, it sounded like more of a holiday than a work-related stay away. According to Freddie, who interrupted the phone calls here and there, Brian had been a right pain in the arse by starting lots of bickers. Shortly after, loud profanities called down the line and then it went completely dead. Bernie just smiled to herself at the thought of what the boys were getting up to before resuming her day. Hearing about the thrill of Ridge Farm really melted her stress away as she was teleported to a land of love, laughter and creativity, so many miles out of her reach.
Flo had been working more night shifts than usual, and Bernie had no reason not to suspect that her sister wasn't secretly staying round June's on those nights spent doing "overtime." Again, Bernie just smiled to herself and went about her day. In two weeks' time, she'd be embarking on a task that she had to get right. Had to. Her theory exam. Which meant that a lot of time both at college and home were spent revising everything she could possibly need to know. Generally, she was rather bright and did well in exams, but that didn't stop her from stressing about it.
By the second Saturday, she'd go as far as to say she was content: news of Ridge Farm was positive on the whole, Flo's life was moving forward and Holden hadn't given Bernie any notice whatsoever, which she was quickly becoming used to. However, by the third Monday, it seemed that Bernie's positivity had hit its peak.
Thursday was her theory exam and on Tuesday, a major barrier intercepted her path to success. She'd been let home early to study and was sitting at her cramped table, surrounded by workbooks and notes when there was a soft knock at the door. Flo had the daytime off, but was out with a few friends, including June. Reluctantly, Bernie got up and went to answer, expecting the only person it could possibly have been. Holden.
"Hello, Princess. I was wondering if I could borrow some milk?"
"No, but the shop down the road will lend you some in exchange for a shilling." Bernie replied cockily, her fear of Holden waning slightly at his lack of domineering persistence.
"Clever. Anyways, I'm not here for milk." He sniffed loudly, unattractively. "I'm here to assess the damage to your broken bathroom sink. I want to see how broken it really is before wasting my time with a plumber. The charges will be too much for you to pay in one go." He shoved his way into the flat and barged through to the living room. On the way, he raised his eyebrows and rolled his eyes at the mess on the kitchen table that wasn't usually there.
"The bathroom is that way." she pointed to the white door on the other side of the room, hopefulness in her voice that Holden was finally doing something about the tragic state this flat was in. Why her and Flo accepted to live here in the first place was utterly beyond Bernie. Perhaps it was the cheap rent and convenient location that lured both of them in.
"I know. Fuck up." In one move, he had a firm hold of Bernie's elbow, pinching the skin a little too tight. Then he brought his head down and attempted to kiss Bernie with a force that she was shocked by. In the nick of time, she moved her face out of the way and his rough lips only caught her cheek. Beings as his grip on her was only in one place, she took advantage of his weak position and went to caress his shoulders, as if she was enjoying this.
A grin spread across his face and his mouth went to try to attack her lips again, but Bernie put her head forward and dug her knee sharply into his crotch, whilst simultaneously head butting him equally as hard in the nose. Reeling back, she was in stitches of laughter as Holden wasn't sure what to nurse first, his painful sensitive area or bleeding nose. "That'll learn ya," she said gleefully, whole body shaking with masked anxiety as she booted him out the door, locking it and putting on the catch. Even with a key, there was no chance of him getting in now unless he broke the door down, which Bernie didn't think he was in any fit position to do at that present moment.
All revision forgotten, she went and laid down on her bed, cradling her knees to her chest, controlling her breathing which now came out ragged and irregular from worry. What the hell would've happened if he'd have had more of a stable grip on her? Especially with nobody around and his powerful position in the building. And of course there was no evidence to press charges, unless she counted the red marks on her arm from where his fingers dug in, which would fade in a little while anyway.
That evening, when Flo came through the door armed with shopping bags, Bernie didn't utter a single word about her day; instead she let her sister endlessly natter on about how spectacular her day had been. But Bernie was too exhausted from earlier's adrenaline rush to pay full attention to Flo's ramblings.
31/12/22 - happy new year!!