"Non non! No no!" Marinette covered her ears with her hands for the fifth time that afternoon. "Tu te trompes! You're wrong! I do not have a crush on Damian Wayne!"
Seven hours had passed since Damian drove Marinette to her apartment on his motorcycle, and Tikki was INSISTENT that Marinette had a crush on the green-eyed boy.
"It's so obvious that you're in love with him!" The little red kwami shouted as she attempted to push Marinette's hands away from her ears. "WHY ARE YOU IN DENIAL? THIS IS GOTHAM, NOT EGYPT!"
"BLAH! BLAH! BLAH! I can't hear you because I'm so busy thinking of things that have nothing to do with having a crush on my new friend! HE'S JUST A FRIEND!"
Tikki suddenly flew in front of Marinette with the most serious expression that an adorable kwami was capable of making. "Then you leave me no choice."
"Huh—"
Tikki zoomed across the apartment room and dove into Marinette's pink purse.
The other kwamis— Kaalki, Trixx, Mullo, Wayzz, Stompp, Roarr, Ziggy, Xuppu, Barkk, Orikko, and Daizzi— floated near the miracle box that Marinette had placed on the table in the center of the room. They watched the entertaining drama unfold between their guardian and the ladybug kwami. Trixx and Mullo even started betting snacks on who would win the argument... but that stopped as soon as Marinette glared at them. The guardian's glare could be very scary.
After rummaging around for a few seconds, Tikki reappeared and flew out of the pink purse. She held Marinette's phone between her tiny red hands. A devious smirk stretched across her face.
The other kwamis hid behind the miracle box.
Somehow... Tikki's smirk was scarier than the guardian's glare.
"Marinette~" Tikki waved the phone. "Do you remember how you and Damian exchanged phone numbers this morning? And you promised to send Damian a text. His number is right here in this phone. I'll send the text for you."
"Tikki, what are you—"
"Hmmmm what should I write?" Tikki turned on the phone and swiped the screen. "Hi Damian Wayne, this is Marinette Dupain-Cheng and I'm in love with you. Or maybe I should make it more poetic? Afterall, this is a declaration of love."
"No!" Marinette jumped on a chair in an attempt to grab the phone. "You wouldn't dare!"
"Oh yes I would dare!" Tikki flew higher into the corner of the ceiling that was out of Marinette's reach. "I refuse to sit back and watch this turn into an Adrien 2.0 situation!"
"Damian is not an Adrien Agreste 2.0!" Marinette's feet slipped off the seat of the chair. Her leg bumped against a small desk that was covered with sewing supplies, spools of thread, and folded fabric. She managed to catch her sewing machine before it slid off the edge of the table.
The kwamis behind the miracle box clapped their hands and cheered for Marinette's lucky last-second catch.
Tikki glared at them.
The room went silent as the kwamis cowered silently behind the box.
"Tikki, this is ridiculous," said Marinette. "You don't need to text Damian something so embarrassing. He's just a friend."
"Is he?" Tikki's eyes widened. "IS HE REALLY JUST A FRIEND, MARINETTE DENIAL-CHENG?!"
"Y-yes." Marinette said, but her eyes couldn't meet Tikki's gaze. She stared down at the sewing machine.
"You're the one who's ridiculous! You're lying to yourself!"
Marinette fidgeted with a spool of green thread— the same color as Damian's eyes. Was Tikki right? Was she lying to herself?
Marinette sighed. She sank into a chair, the same chair that she had slipped off just moments ago, and imagined that Damian was here in her apartment room.
She imagined him standing in his Gotham Academy uniform. He was so tall. If imaginary Damian lifted his arm, he could easily touch the apartment ceiling. If imaginary Damian rolled up the sleeves of his school uniform, his arms would have the same tan skin that covered his hands. If imaginary Damian reached his tan hands towards her—
Marinette accidentally dropped the spool of green thread when she remembered how Damian had held her hand in the school hallway that morning.
Shivers spread across her skin.
The good kind of shivers.
Imaginary Damian stepped across the apartment room. He grabbed her hands, interlocking their fingers. Marinette wondered what had made his hands so calloused—
Marinette's breath hitched as imaginary Damian lifted one of her hands. His smirking lips pressed against her knuckles. The kiss was so gentle that she didn't feel it.
Of course she didn't feel it.
This was imaginary Damian.
What would a kiss from the real Damian feel like?
"Mon Dieu!" Marinette felt her face burning with a blush. "Oh my god, Tikki, you're right! I have a crush on Damian Wayne!"
"Finally! You stopped denying it!" Tikki happily twirled in the air. "Now you can tell Damian that you have feelings for him, and then you'll start dating, and when you two get married you can finally have the three kids and a hamster that you've always dreamed about—"
"Tikki! Pouvez-vous attendre une minute, s'il vous plaît? Can you wait a minute, please?"
Tikki froze in the air.
"I can't tell Damian that I have a crush on him." Marinette buried her burning face in her hand.
"You're joking..."
"Non! I'm very serious right now. I have to prioritize my identity as Ladybug over my love life. Don't you remember how Damian called his older brother and the police when I went missing at school? What will he do when I have to respond to an akuma attack in the middle of a date? Also, I've only known him for like two days! Isn't it a little soon to confess feelings?"
Tikki didn't respond. The other kwamis dared not speak. Silence filled the apartment room.
Marinette kept her head down and ran her hands through her dark hair.
She couldn't risk a romantic relationship.
Saving Paris was her priority. Defeating Hawkmoth was her priority. Keeping her superhero identity a secret was her priority.
Marinette finally looked up... just in time to see Tikki type something on her phone and press send. The ladybug kwami giggled. "Hehe, oops—"
"NOOOOOOOO!" Marinette shrieked. "TIKKI WHAT DID YOU WRITE?!"
"I dunno," said Tikki. "You'll have to read it for yourself."
"Hey! What's going on out here?" Plagg's green eyes peeked out of the miracle box.
"Hi Plagg!" Tikki waved the phone. "It's been forever since you've left the box. I'm helping Marinette confess her feelings to Damian Wayne."
"Who?" The black kwami slowly flew from the box.
"One of Marinette's classmates at Gotham Academy. You'll like him. He has green eyes, dark hair, and enough money to buy the world's most expensive cheese. Oh! You should come to school with us tomorrow and see him yourself! Afterall, he is Marinette's future husband."
"I AM NOT GETTING MARRIED TO DAMIAN! I HAVE TO DEFEAT HAWKMOTH!"
"Sooooo... you'll have the wedding after Hawkmoth's defeat?" Tikki asked.
Plagg crossed his little black arms. "If this guy is really as rich as Sugarcube says he is, then make him order a wedding cake filled with the stinkiest and creamiest Camembert cheese that money can buy."
"Eww no," said Tikki. "Wedding cakes are supposed to be sweet and sugary!"
"Hey! But Camembert is white!"
Marinette shook her head. "There's not going to be a wedding cake, because there's NOT GOING TO BE A WEDDING ANYTIME SOON!"
"You never know~" Tikki waved the phone.
This situation had escalated too far.
Marinette reached out her hand and used her miraculous side-effect guardian powers to open a swirling neon blue mini-portal. She snatched the phone from Tikki. The portal closed after she pulled back her hand and flicked her wrist.
"I can't believe you did something like this..." Marinette hesitantly looked down at the screen. The text message had two words.
Hi Damian!
Wait. What?
"That's it?" Marinette blinked her eyes and checked again. "You only said hi?"
"Marinette, it would be better if YOU told Damian how you feel about him." Tikki smiled. "I'm giving you until the end of the week to do it yourself."
"But I can't just—"
"If you still haven't told Damian how you feel about him by the end of the week, then I'll use my powers of creation to make a giant banner in the sky that says Marinette Denial-Cheng is in love with Damian Wayne."
"But that would be a disaster! Everyone would figure out that the Ladybug miraculous is in Gotham!"
"Then you better start thinking about how you'll confess to Damian by Friday."
"I thought you said that I have until the end of the week?"
"I meant the end of the school week."
Plagg burst out into a fit of laughter. "Sugarcube isn't so sweet today—"
A sudden knock sounded on Marinette's apartment door.
Marinette and the kwamis froze.
"Marigold? This is Ivy and Harley. Is everything alright? We heard shouting coming from your apartment. Are there other people in there with you?"
[Ch 15 - 1,513 words]
Thanks for reading! This chapter really was Tikki's moment to shine as the ultimate aggressive shipper...
*Tikki in the background burning Adrienette, Lukanette, and Marichat fanart in a bonfire*
Tikki: "Daminette must reign supreme."
*Damian standing behind Tikki and happily nodding his head in approval*