I've calmed down now.
......No, I'm pretending to be calm.
I have to pretend to be calm or else my vocabulary will crumble..
That's no wonder, because......I'm currently going shopping with my step brother, Kazei Riku at a certain shopping mall. That alone makes me whirled up.
Originally, I shouldn't have fallen in love with him, but now I'm obsessed with him.
It should have been that way.
Before he cut his hair, I hated him because of his bad appearance and gloomy personality, but he was actually my step brother who saved me when I got entangled with a bunch of bad guys.
I learned this truth when my classmates came to visit my house. It all started when one of my classmates, Miuchi san, cut his hair.
When that dull guy got his haircut, his face was gradually revealed. And when Miuchi san finished cutting his hair, I learned that he was the one who had saved me.
I was surprised at this fact.
My attitude since I met him was not a good one. In fact, it wouldn't be an exaggeration to say that I was the worst thing that could have happened to him.
That's how much I hated him.
But he helped me out of trouble.
I'm sure there's no one who doesn't regret hating and mistreating the person they liked.
I was so sorry for what I had done to him.
The day I learned this fact, I couldn't sleep for a night with regret and self-loathing.
The next day, still feeling sleepy and regretful, I went to school and found that the world had changed.
The girls in the class, who until yesterday had been indifferent to his appearance, were excited at the sight of him with a haircut.
With his haircut and his glasses off, he was a so-called good-looking guy, and all of his classmates rushed to his side.
Even though he just cut his hair...
I have a vague feeling of annoyance through my chest, but I am not qualified to say anything about it. I was one of the people who was excited about the guy who cut his hair.
During lunch break, I was feeling uncomfortable due to a lack of sleep, and I began to feel even worse when I heard some of my female classmates shouting when they saw him and Genpaku kun, the most handsome guy in the class, standing shoulder to shoulder.
I get up from my seat to get out of the classroom to get away from that unpleasant atmosphere.......but suddenly it gets dark in front of me. I was dizzy from lack of sleep.
"Sora ! !"
In the midst of losing my consciousness, that guy's voice echoes in my head. That voice made me feel at ease... and I lost consciousness.
In my dream, I saw the back of someone I had missed.
It was the back of my real brother, Riku, who's no longer with me.
Riku, my twin brother, was strong and kind, whom I admire. I can feel the warmth of my brother, who is long gone, touching my skin.......
I wonder if it is my imagination. .....
When I woke up from my dream, I was on a bed in the infirmary.
At first I didn't know what had happened and looked around, but then I heard a voice say, [...... Sora, are you awake?].
He was there beside me.
I was startled by the voice and pulled the blanket over me and said [Why are you here ! !].
It's a bad habit I've developed over the past few months.
When I see that guy, I tend to curse at him.
At my words, he said [Sorry....]..
I heard that I fainted in the classroom and collapsed, so he carried me to the infirmary.
When I heard that, my face started to heat up.
That's no wonder. The fact that he carried me to the infirmary means that he touched my body.
And it was easy to imagine that he was carrying me like a princess, which made me even more embarrassed.
However, the fact that he kept apologizing to me, saying [I'm sorry......] was a little off-putting, and at that point I said [Are you stupid?].
Those words apply to me too.
It was me who made him do that. When I think of that, I feel ashamed.
I don't know what to make of him, the person I hated and the person I loved have combined and now I don't know what he is.
So, I wanted to be alone as soon as possible, and I tried to kick him out of the infirmary.
But as he was leaving the infirmary, there was one thing I wanted to.....confirm.
"Hey, why are you being so nice to me?"
When I asked, he thought for a while and said,
"Well, we're family....right?"
Then he quickly left the infirmary.
I was shocked to hear that.
To him, I was nothing but family.
It was natural.
Even if we had been strangers before, we're now step siblings with the same parents. No matter how coldly I may have treated them, I felt glad that he saw me as family.
But there are no more feelings than that, that's just the way it is. That fact is frustrating, but I can't change it.
Since he has changed, I have to change too, or the worst impression he had of me will never change.
From that day on, I decided to be nice to him.
However, my pride was not so low that I could be nice to him immediately.
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