Anderson
I was in the middle of this investors meeting with Julian, Julez and their team but I wasn't here.
My mind kept replaying my latest actions and I can't honestly say I'm proud of myself.
Mi a hurt Shan and ultimately, hurt myself.
Mi know Shan and how her mind works in most situations and I know I couldn't expect her to get my point of view. But mi just never feel like explain myself on an issue that I myself can't explain fully.
Char
That has been the topic of our constant arguments for the past two weeks and Shanique has some way convinced herself that there is more to what meets the eye
Granted, there is but it's not what she thinks.
Typically, I can hold my cool with Shanique but the way things have played out has made it difficult for me.
Shanique nah give me nuh pussy.
We haven't had sex since the night before she left for Jamaica almost two months ago. Every fucking night Mi affi a back my fist and at this point me a lose it.
My temper is way shorter, even for me. Mi cya focus at work and mi miserable as fuck at home.
Now, the one person that has been providing some light is an issue.
Char.
That has been the centre of our disagreement.
I understand where she is coming from though. She doesn't understand what's happening and I haven't been open about what it is.
I don't know if I fully understand what it is. This is totally out of character for me. However, this new development is something that I'm not ready to let go of.
"Anderson here is a genius at marketing and has been in the consultant seat for many of my projects. I was absolutely happy when he started his own thing a few years ago and was even happier when told me about this recent expansion.
Guys, I'm telling you he's the real deal. He doesn't say much but that mind... never stops working ." Julian sells me to his team of sharks.
I didn't give a fuck but they have the big bucks and that's my goal at the end of the day.
I have expensive taste and I'll need funding for that.
"I saw what you did with Bier. I thought they would be pushed out of the market in a couple years but they had a major turn around. I'm impressed." A pot-bellied dude says, referencing to my German client.
I nodded at him to let him know I'm following.
"How did you even do that?" He asked, looking at me expectantly.
I weighed my mind if I actually even wanted to respond but I saw Julian giving me puppy dog eyes from across the table and I conceded
A little.
"Research and common sense." I tell him.
He looked disappointed.
Oh well.
Looking around I saw a bunch of confused faces so I decided to throw them a bone.
"I changed the target demographic. They were marketing to who they thought were their customers and not their actual customers. I Change the messaging to fit your actual target group, and you have a domino effect."
They all burst into intense discussion around desired target vs actual target, frequently picking my brain on issues they see in their company's but I simply spoon fed them bits of information until they started asking for my card so we could discuss more.
Mission accomplished.
If I secured at least two of these guys, Cryptic London will be moving in the green.
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"Hey stranger! I haven't seen you in over a week. You good?" Char's voice comes over the speaker.
I smiled while I eased back in my home office.
"Hey, busy week. Plus I gave you homework. Did you do it?" I said and she chuckled.
"Yes! I did your homework. You could have simply told me to go do my own research if you didn't want to give me a solution to my problem." She teased.
"You wouldn't have received the message in that moment. I needed you to see the importance of doing the grunt work for yourself." I say to her and she laughed.
"Yes Anderson. I appreciate that you don't just tell me what to do. It's actually helping me with my discussion with the board." She beams
I laughed out loud.
"What are those old farts saying now?" I ask getting comfortable in my chair.
"Ugh! The usual, double, triple guessing my decisions. Every aspect of this rollout I have to be explaining and explaining. Now you know why I wanted to be involved, they don't trust me." She rants and I listened.
"Like, you gave me a dying business and I'm trying to do something with it and ugh!" She screamed.
"Stop calling it that. If you keep referring to it as that then that that's what it will be." I warned her and she grew silent.
"How has the leads been coming along?" I asked just to change the subject.
"So, that's kind of what I wanted to talk to you about. I signed two new models this week." She whispered and I paused.
"Congratulations." I tell her feeling proud.
"It's because of you. You've been such a mentor in this short time that I've known you. I'm happy I found the courage to speak to you that night. You were so intimidating." She says and I could tell she was pouting.
She pouts a lot.
"That didn't stop you though"
"I'm used to being around intimidating people." Was her come back.
I didn't have a response for that so I just sat back listening to her breathe.
We do this a lot. Just sit in silence once the conversation dies down.
———————————-
Sweat dripped down my face as pumped at a steady pace. I was growing tired because I've been going at it for a good hour and a half now.
It's been a while since I've been in a position like this. I didn't want to stop so I kept pumping harder.
It's months now Mi nuh touch dem place here.
Another half an hour and I grew too tired to continue, I had to stop. My body was drenched with sweat and my knees were weak.
Setting the bar back on the machine, I rose up from the bench and looked around the deserted gym. A mi alone deh here.
Checking the time, I see that's it's minutes to 2 am. Time fi mi come go home. I have a meeting tomorrow at 9 and I can't be late.
I debated whether I could shower here or wait until I get home but I don't think I'll be able to keep my eyes open then.
Taking up my duffle I made my way to the gym showers. Need fi wash off the day off a me.
I pulled up to the house around 2:30 and I just sat in the car.
I think I fell asleep because the next think I know is a bright light waking me up. I was still parked out front and the sun was rising.
Looking at my watch I realize it's 7 in the fucking morning.
Fuck!
I gathered my things and bolted out of the car and ran through the front door. Running upstairs I threw my gym bag on the bedroom floor and ran into the shower.
I needed to leave within the hour or traffic is going to cause me to be late for my meeting.
I took the quickest shower in history and ran out to find something decent to wear. Picking up my laptop bag with the documents that I worked on for the meeting, I walked back to the closet for my coat.
I sped walk downstairs and headed for the door when I spotted Shan sitting on the couch. She was dressed in her work attire while scrolling on her phone.
I guess she sensed my presence because she looked up. I stood at the door looking at her with a case of anxiety running through my body.
"You were planning to leave without me?" Shan asked and I felt like shit.
At my silence she stood, took up her bag and walked out the door, not saying anything else.
Mi just a fuck up suh man.
The ride to the office was silent and intense. Shan was on her phone for the entire ride and I was growing nervous as each minute passed by.
I was racking my brain around what the fuck to say to break the ice but I drew blanks.
Things just awkward.
"I like her." I say and almost slapped myself on my mouth.
Why the fuck would you start with that idiot?
Shan didn't react to my statement but I know she was listening.
Looking at the traffic ahead a racked my brain around what else to say. Mi nuh suppose to a find it so hard fi talk to her but I am.
"Not like a girl but more like a friend. That's how I see her. Nothing more." I explained but Shan still not looking my way.
"I felt a connection with her the first time we met. Like it wasn't instant like towrh you but more of a slow burn. I feel protective of her. Like in an older brother kind of way." I tried to explain myself better but Shan face screwed up.
I stopped talking.
Shan went throughout the day giving me the silent treatment. She was quiet throughout our meeting this morning and throughout the remainder of the day.
I ordered us lunch but she didn't eat it.
Shan nuh refuse food.
I watched her smile and talk to the workers as if nothing was going on but to me, silence.
I was fucking stressed out.
At the end of the day she came into the office and packed up her stuff before going to sit on the futon. I was still working at my desk, so I wasn't quite ready.
My phone pinged with an email from Julian that made me smile.
Fr. Julian 🥊: Everything is set. Get there by 7 and tell them your name.
To Julian 🥊: Thanks bro. I owe you 1.
I checked the time. 5:30pm.
I had another thirty minutes before we needed to leave and I had some paperwork to get through.
The office was silent for a little while but soon Shan opened up her favourite app - Tik Tok and that filled the silence.
I blocked out the noise and zoned into my work. When I checked the time again it was minutes after six so I closed down the system and started getting ready.
"Leaving in 2 minutes." I announce so Shan can get ready.
She got up and went to the bathroom and I took up both of our bags and stood by the door waiting for her. When she emerged from the bathroom i opened the door and let her walk ahead of me.
I don't know why I'm torturing myself with this view but Shan sexy nuh fuck, mi cya help myself.
Imputing the name of the restaurant into the GPS, I quickly drive out of the parking lot.
Shan was still deep in her Tik Tok and I was grateful that she wasn't paying attention. Mi nuh waah she see the pre.
The drive was a good 45 minutes due to London traffic. Pulling into the restaurants space I drove up to the valet. Shan looked out of the window at the building before she looked across the car to me.
"You deserve a date night, don't you agree?" I asked her and she nodded.
I smiled before getting out of the car.
I opened Shan's door before throwing the keys to the valet.
Shan gripped my hand as we walk up the restaurant's steps. She still hasn't spoken but having her close to me is enough.
"Hi, I'm Angel and I'll be your server tonight. Can I start you off with a drink?" The blonde waitress spoke and I looked to Shan.
She looked at the menu before asking for a bottle of wine and I smirked.
My wife a sample enuh.
The lady came back with the wine and poured it into our glasses. Shan took a sip and nodded her approval.
I watched her in admiration. She's beautiful.
"Are you guys ready to order now?"
After mi not even look pon di menu yet.
I took up the menu and started to browse my options.
"Can we have the shrimp platter to start?" I heard my wife's voice say.
Shan she ago know weh she want when it come to food enuh. Then again, she didn't eat at all today so I know she's probably hungry.
I kept searching the menu for what I want to eat. Spotting the leg of lamb meal I smiled. Me love lamb bad. I'll order that.
When the girl came back with the appetizer I was ready to make my dinner order.
She took our order and left us alone to eat in silence.
"I'm sorry." I say after some time.
I've handled this entire situation badly and as Shan's husband I've failed her. It shouldn't have gotten to this point.
Shan stopped chewing and looked up at me.
We held eye contact for some time. I was on edge by the silence towards me and I was about to scream out of frustration.
"Cut her off." Shan demanded and everything stopped.
"The friendship and business dealings. Cut all ties with her and then I'll accept the apology." She says before she goes back to her food.
"Shan, you realize we are in the middle of a campaign right?" I asked and she chuckled.
"I don't care."
Wah she mean by she don't care?
"Shanique be serious right now." I say and she gave me a sharp look.
"Is there a problem?" She asked sarcastically.
I chuckled at her pettiness. She knows how important this rebranding campaign is for Char. She is being spiteful.
Plus, dropping her in the middle of an execution will not only affect Char but the business as well.
She is very well connected and if I do this, it could kill cryptic's chances of making it in London.
Shan a be emotional.
She is not thinking about this carefully.
"I can't do that and you know that." I tell her and she chuckled.
"So you're choosing her?" Shan says and I looked at her confused.
She nodded while mumbling to herself.
Right back to square fucking one.
We got home after a pretty awkward dinner and I was ready to call it a night.
Shan walked ahead of me upstairs and I followed her undressing from my now uncomfortable suit.
I need a shower and a nap.