Authors Note: Okay, here I am with a Code Lyoko fanfiction starring William Dunbar in his sexy glory. This story is one I've been working on for a long time, I originally posted this on fanfiction around 2012 or so. I've been working hard on this story as well as a few others! Hope you like it! This has been posted on Fanfiction, Archives of Our Own, and Wattpad.
Disclaimer: I do not own Code Lyoko at all. I am not affiliated with the it in any way. All rights belong to Thomas Romain, Tania Palumbo, and Moonscoop. I don't intend of making any sort of profit on this. I merely write this for fun. The only thing I do own is my OCs but that's it. Thank you for understanding.
TW: This story is rated T and it will stay that way, so the biggest warnings that I could give is that there will be some language, violence, and sexual content but all of it is mild. Basically it's a story surrounding a bunch of teenagers, there's nothing too worthy to note for any trigger warnings for this story that I can think of.
As of 7/15/22: This cover was made using picrew, so I didn't draw it, you can find it here: https://picrew.me/image_maker/1744829
________________________________________________________________________________
Chapter 1: Cold
________________________________________________________________________________
The rain are the tears I can't cry...
Wandering in the quiet solitude while the other students of Kadic Academy slept, William Dunbar found himself wandering aimlessly during the dead of night, finding the atmosphere fit his current somber mood. A storm raged on this particular winter's night, the clouds a black void, the rain pelted him like needles, and the frigid gale pierced him like a dagger. He was getting soaked, the cold howling at him to get back inside, but he didn't care. The rain continued its torrential downpour, streaming down his face giving him the illusion of him crying. He felt tears sting his eyes, threatening to fall, but made an attempt to suppress them by ducking his head down, tightly gripping his shirt, and clenching his teeth. Nevertheless, he walked on before finally settling to sit down on a bench, deep in his anhedonia.
Lately everything seemed to be a blur, as if he was running on autopilot. Only just a couple weeks ago, when he first returned to Earth, everything was hazy, initially so unaware of how much time had passed. He soon found out he was taken prisoner and possessed by XANA, trapped on Lyoko for several months. Reality hit him like a ton of bricks, it had been agonizing. Just like that, precious life moments he could've spent with them were sucked away.
He recounted everything, from his first time going to Lyoko for the first time with Aelita on a mission to protect the core of Lyoko and got separated from Aelita as monsters attacked him. Then a strange jellyfish called the Scyphozoa appeared and he became possessed by XANA. Under the influence of XANA, he attempted to kill his friends' countless times. In order to avoid suspicion, Jeremie had to make a clone of him, but said clone ended up being entirely unlike him and lacked any sort of common sense. His classmates either thought he was playing up acting a fool or questioned his sanity altogether. Worse yet, his parents even began worrying about him and he came back just in time to reassure them that he was alright. Every night, nightmares of the times he was possessed by XANA haunted his mind, sometimes he'd even jolt awake crying. Worse yet, the rest of the gang began to push him away. To them, he was just a thorn in their sides that they couldn't pull out, nothing more than an annoyance.
Ulrich always gave him scornful looks and would openly criticize him to the others, reminding him of how much he screwed up. Sometimes he'd overhear Ulrich talking shit about him and there were times they'd get into arguments, there were times they'd get into arguments, just short of beating each other to a pulp. Especially in regards to their affections for Yumi, Ulrich had always been quite possessive over her, getting jealous quite easily. He had thought Ulrich was a decent guy, but in the end, it seemed he hated him anyway.
Odd treated everything like a big joke. Just like Ulrich, he wasn't shy about expressing his disappointment and made occasional jokes at William's expense. Yet, Odd barely ever took anything in life seriously. He'd rather just laugh away his problems.
Jeremie was different, while he wasn't outwardly rude, he seemed to hold the older boy at arm's length. His reluctance made some sense though, Jeremie was never the confrontational type, so drama to him was like a pestilence.
Aelita seemed to be the most sympathetic, but seemed under pressure to keep quiet by her friends. Like Jeremie, she was conflict avoidant, though at times he could hear her trying to tell them it wasn't right to treat them the way they do.
But of course, it was the rejection by Yumi that hurt the most of all. He loved her dearly, he thought she was the love of his life, but she left him in the dust. He couldn't recall a time in his life where he felt so betrayed, to be tossed out like trash.
I'd never hurt any of them intentionally... But it was my fault to begin with...
He knew he was to blame; his overzealous and overconfidence is what screwed him over, so desperate to prove that he was cool. Never did he expect that things would take such a bad turn. It hurt him more than he could say, but he could never admit that to anyone. Especially not to them.
Suddenly a female voice spoke, snapping him out of his thoughts, "Excuse me, William, but what are doing out in this?" The voice was soft, nearly inaudible, the rain nearly drowning it out, but he heard it clear as day.
He turned to see a girl who seemed to blend in seamlessly into the night sitting on the bench with him. In that moment, everything about her seemed so otherworldly to him, from her ghost white skin, long ebony hair, sapphire eyes, and her gentle aura. He recognized this girl, she was Kandadara, a fellow classmate in his grade.
To him and everyone else at Kadic, she was a girl shrouded in mystery, just like her younger sister Sayaia. Neither of them had very many friends, if any, as he typically only saw them hanging out with each other. Initially he didn't think much of her, his first impression of her was she appeared to be a shy, solitary, and secretive person, a type that kept herself guarded. People often called regarded her as an outcast, even saying she's dark, and yet despite that, she seemed to be a good person and he never got any malicious intent from her.
But why was she here?
William's eyes met hers, observing her closely, trying to read what she thinking. Her gaze was rather intense, as if she was searching him too, stripping him down to his soul. He couldn't stand it; she was seeing him at his most vulnerable, it irritated him. He questioned her, a sharp edge in his tone, "I could ask you the same thing. What are you doing out here?"
A few tense seconds of silence passed by as she looked away, uncomfortable. Silence wasn't something she typically minded, often finding herself craving it, but this situation was different. The way he stared her down, expecting an answer, intimidated her. He didn't seem to be too fond of her presence right now, though lately, he tended to be standoffish towards everyone. Trying in vain to formulate a response in her head, she found herself at a loss for words.
But what could she say? Her honest reasoning was she saw him walking in this weather and grew concerned about him, so she followed him to check on him. But she couldn't admit that, he'd certainly think of her as a stalker and maybe even snap at her, considering his current agitated state.
She replied, both expression and tone disquieted, "I suppose you could..." She shifted slightly, fidgeting with her wet clothes, before continuing, "Are you alright...?"
With just one simple glance, she suddenly felt like a fool to ask such a thing. The answer was already obvious, of course he wasn't. The boy who stood before her now wasn't the same one she used to know; she could barely recognize him anymore.
When she first met him, he came off as a charismatic rebel type, yet he was still kind. Even when other students ignored her or even outright bullied her, he never paid any heed to that and was still friendly to her. Underneath that bad boy exterior, she saw a caring person. As the months went by, she began to develop feelings for him. And yet, she didn't dare tell him her feelings, for she knew they were unrequited.
She knew full well he loved Yumi, another one-sided affection, as Yumi's heart is set on Ulrich and the feeling was mutual. In fact, everyone in the school knew that Ulrich and Yumi liked each other, but they themselves couldn't see that. It was a classic case of will-they or won't-they get together.
At first, Yumi seemed to enjoy his company and like she liked him back, much to Kandadara's chagrin. Every time she saw them together, she felt a mixture of sadness and a bitter jealousy. In the end, despite always insisting that they are just friends, the one Yumi chose was Ulrich and pushed William away.
Yumi and her hang of friends often disappeared, something many such as Jim, Sissi, and even William suspicious. For a short time, it seemed as if William befriended them, but it wasn't to last. Almost as soon as that happened, he suddenly disappeared without a single trace, which at the time, scared her, fearing something bad happened to him. She later heard that he just went on an overseas trip and then got the flu. But even so, she found that strange. Why didn't he tell anyone?
But when he came back, he had changed. He acted like he lost all semblance of common sense, taking everything literally and not understanding figures of speech, like a class clown. Everyone thought he either lost his mind or was joking around, even she wasn't sure if it was some gag or if he reached temporary insanity.
After that whole oddball phase, a few weeks ago he seemed to make another drastic change, this time for the worst. He became more depressive, he deliberately isolated himself from everyone. He also became more aged and world weary, as if the life was sucked out of him. He had dark circles under his eyes, shadowed with fatigue, as if he was having nightmares. His skin had turned pale and ashen, as if he was ill. He also looked thinner and frailer, as if he wasn't eating. This wasn't the William she knew, not anymore.
He glared at her with icy eyes, this was the first time he used such a gaze on her. Though lately, this seemed to become the default for him. He finally asked, tone bitter, "Why do you care?"
She hesitated. She knew he wanted to be left alone, but something told her he needed someone to be there for him. Her heart wouldn't let her live it down if she left now. There was a difference between want and need. She spoke softly, voice almost a whisper, "I just wanted to help you...You seem so down lately...So I..." She trailed off.
He snapped at her, raising his voice, "It's none of your damn business!"
"B-But I..." She squeaked out, as if on instinct trying to reach for him.
He cut her off, nearly shouting at her, as if releasing all the anger he tried to suppress, "Just leave me alone!" He lunged at her and grabbed her shoulders roughly, pinning her down on the bench, the force causing her head to slam against the wood.
In the same instant, the weather only got worse. Lightning flashed in the sky and thunder roared, mirroring the intensity of their emotions. As if the sky itself was crying for them.
"W-William...that hurts..." At first, she struggled in vain to get free, but his grip was too strong. "L-Let go..."
He looked down at her, as if he was dominating over her. She was paralyzed in fear and she couldn't stop herself from trembling. They were so close, it would be easy to kiss, however any thoughts of romancing or seducing were the furthest thing on their minds.
Despite all of this, she still didn't place any blame on him. He was suffering, she wanted to help him, somehow. If she could so anything to help him, that would be more than enough. She wanted to see him smile again.
He was surprised at his own actions, such an outburst, especially directed at an innocent girl, it wasn't like him at all. He was horrified of the 'him' he had become, as if XANA's presence was still inside of him, he didn't even recognize himself now.
He questioned her, voice strained, "Why do you care so much?"
She met his gaze and replied, both gaze and tone tender, "Because...I know you're a good guy..." She believed that wholeheartedly, even if he didn't.
For a moment, his face softened a little, heart clinging onto that glimmer of hope. He desperately wanted to believe her words, but it seemed all too hopeless. He never felt so conflicted, part of him wanted to let her in, but another wanted to push her away. The idea of getting close to anyone again, he was genuinely afraid of that.
He couldn't help but wonder why she was even bothering with him. Did she like him? Such an explanation would make sense, she always seemed to watch him from the sidelines. Or did she just pity him? Regardless of her reasoning, it didn't matter.
His own inner voice reminded him of that somber fact. Even if you like me, I don't see why you do...I don't deserve it... I'm a monster...
He released her, turning away from her. He murmured, "You're too late, I'm not anymore." His expression was one of anguish, voice full of self-loathing. "The William you once knew died long ago, Kandadara. You can't do anything for me now..." He finally released his grip on her and got off her, still in disbelief he even did such a thing.
His words were harsh, a mental knife that sliced into her soul. He seemed to truly believe those words, as if he were irredeemable, a dead seriousness. Unsure of what else to say, the only thing she could think of was an apology. Her voice was just as melancholic, "I'm sorry I..."
He couldn't bring himself to look at her, shame washing over him. All he could do was weakly say, as if pleading with her, "Please just go, okay...?"
Such a fragile tone he used, a desperation and fear, it took her aback. But she complied with his request and left to go back into her room. Tears streamed down her face, indistinguishable from the rain. He was suffering, but she couldn't do anything to help him.
What should I do...? She wondered forlornly, looking up at the stormy night sky.
William just stood in that winter's raging storm; guilt began overwhelming him. He inwardly cursed himself as he silently walked back to his dorm room. He knew he did her wrong, he treated her just as terrible as his former friends did towards him. He was an insufferable asshole.
"I'm sorry, Kandadara..." He said softly into the open, knowing she couldn't hear him. He knew what the right thing to do was to apologize. In fact, he owed it to her, but right now, he couldn't bring himself to do it.
Right now, he just hurt too damn much.
________________________________________________________________________________
Kandadara ran until she reached her room. When she got there, she slammed the door shut, threw herself on the bed, and sobbing. His words replayed on repeat like a broken tape recorder, looping endlessly.
"You're too late, I'm not anymore. The William you once knew died long ago, Kandadara. You can't do anything for me now..."
She desperately didn't want to believe those words were true, praying everything was a nightmare. Would she wake up soon with everything just fine with William being his old self? Such a reverie, but this was the cruel reality. She knew deep down he had forever changed, for some strange reason. So many thoughts spun about in her head, she wondered if he would ever be alright again.
What happened to you that caused such a drastic change? Why is it you've been acting so strange the past several months? Will you ever be able to return?
Somehow, her intuition was telling her something that she couldn't deny.
Why is it I get the feeling that Yumi and her friends behind all of this somehow? What did Yumi do to break his heart? Why are they ignoring him like he's worthless? What could he have done that was so horrible?
A heavy-hearted realization struck her, could William be right? Could it be that I can't help him...? But then, there's only one person who can...
There was only one person who can mend his broken heart.
She cried out softly, as if to herself, "William, I'm so sorry..."
"Eh...? Sister, what's wrong...?" Kandadara heard a faint, yet lethargic voice. She rose up to see Sayaia, sitting up in her bed and rubbing her eyes, seeming drowsy.
Sayaia was Kandadara's younger sister by about a year. They shared many of the same physical traits, such as their skin color, hair color, and overall body type. The only real difference was that Sayaia's eyes were an amethyst shade and preferred wearing her hair in twin-tails in contrast to Kandadara simply letting her hair flow.
Kandadara heaved a sigh, imagining herself releasing her stress. She looked at her with a melancholy and finally spoke ever so softly, "I'm sorry I woke you up, I guess I just haven't had the best night..."
Sayaia wasn't entirely lucid, but she had an inclination as to why. She asked, cautious, "It's William, right...?"
Kandadara remain silent, but gave a subtle nod.
"I'm sorry..."
Kandadara felt more than a little bit guilty for waking up Sayaia. Above all else, she didn't want to think about that anymore, at least for the night, it was better to just change the subject, "It's late, let's get to bed." She lied back down on her bed, figuring it she would have more clarity in the morning, she was exhausted. "Good night, Sayaia..."
"Okay...Good night..." Sayaia said softly, laying back down in her bed as well. Within a few minutes, she was fast asleep.
After that, Kandadara went to take her usual late-night shower they both did, put her own pajamas on, and fell into a dreamless sleep of her own.
________________________________________________________________________________
Author's Note: So what do you think of my story? Let me know your thoughts and favorite it if you liked it!
-Luminous Luminita
Edit 10/2/22: I'm currently doing a rewrite and revision of this story, as I'm now unsatisfied with the current state of it. While the overall plot and scenes are more or less fine, I felt I really overdid it with the angst factor to where it feels like "wangst" to me, especially in the first chapter. I've rewritten this chapter to where I'm satisfied with it, sometimes less can be more with this sort of thing. I've read some of the reviews throughout platforms, I'm really touched, I want to continue and do this justice to all who've read thisa. I promise I will try my best to deliver!