This was a hell of a ride. And you made it. Thank you, dear reader, for reading my story. I hope you stick around to here a little more of what I have to say.
I started writing this story back in 2018. Five years later, a few minutes after midnight on January 10, 2023, three days after what would be Margo Sandoval's first birthday (yes, I'm disappointed I didn't finish it ON her actual birthday), I have successfully completed the first draft. That's right. The first draft. Writing Cognitive Deviance was, without a doubt, my most exhaustive project yet, and not just because of the dark subject matter. Looking back, I realized that this story matured with me. I started writing it in my sophomore year of high school, and I completed it only half a year away from graduating college. The story definitely changed here and there but nowhere near the amount of directions my life has gone in since I started writing it.
You definitely don't need to read on further considering it's all just fun facts from here on out, but I just wanted to thank you again for reading my story! Even though this is just the first draft, I am very proud of the way the story, the characters, and the twists came out. Which reminds me: if you do plan on rereading the story to catch all the foreshadowing and other cool things you missed on the first read, please DO NOT spoil the story in the comments. There are still lots of first-time readers. However, feel free to call out plot holes or inconsistencies because once again this is only the first draft.
If you're done for now, then have an amazing day! If you'd like to keep reading, then go right on ahead!
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I thought it'd be fun to acknowledge a few big changes made as the story went on. Here's the most noteworthy ones:
1. For starters, the novel was originally titled Psycho Slums, and the titular location was going to play a far larger role in the story, a far more different one at that. Rather than consisting of neighborhoods filled with crime and mistreated mentally ill citizens, the Psycho Slums were actually Psychwatch-operated insane asylums the size of city districts, filled with the most violent and unstable individuals imaginable! But the idea fell away after the title was switched to Cognitive Deviance to avoid confusion with the cyberpunk anime Psycho-Pass, which many readers have (oftentimes very rudely) compared this story to.
2. The story was going to be far lighter in tone, and on top of that, Margo and Jack were gonna have a relationship more akin to Judy Hopps and Nick Wilde in Zootopia, at each others' throats at first before blossoming into an unlikely friendship with hints at something more. However, as I continued developing Margo and Jack's individual character arcs over time, I realized that a romance or even close friendship between them was not only unnecessary, but nonsensical and even had slightly harmful implications. Wattpad (and fiction in general) already have enough stories that promote the false idea that romance can cure people of their inhumanity. Jack would tear Margo apart (and literally spent the last chapters threatening to do so), and he'd do the same to all of you. I only say that because I care about you guys. He does not. So stop crying about the Epilogue, please.
3. The Multi Man, Whitey, and Crimson were always meant to be the villains, but the Multi Man's ultimate plan was vastly different than how it came out. Originally, not only was he explicitly stated to have dissociative identity disorder, but Whitey would have it as well! They were still serial killers, but they received all those personalities by transferring the consciousness of their victims into their own heads via PACER before mutilating the bodies beyond recognition. This was heavily modified because 1) DID is already one of the most misrepresented and stigmatized mental illnesses in the media, which motivated me to focus on having the vastly more sympathetic and heroic Carl as the one with DID rather than the two bloodthirsty villains, and 2) even in this story's world, having so many characters with DID seemed hard to believe. Same goes for the casual mind transference technology; although, this aspect was still reworked into the concept of cognitive deviation and helped raise the stakes during the final confrontation between Margo and the Multi Man.
4. Furthermore, it would eventually be revealed that two of the personalities the Multi Man had trapped in his head were none other than Cyrus Lynch and Tetsuo Fujioka, the founders of Psychwatch, and the Multi Man would turn out to be a Frankenstein-esque creature made of an assortment of body parts of past victims. The Frankenstein idea is...just something induced in the PACER, and the fates of Lynch and Fujioka are far more ambiguous.
5. Going back to the lighter tone, almost no main characters were planned to be killed off. Not even the main villains. The Multi Man, Whitey, and Crimson would've just been incarcerated for life. I eventually came to the conclusion that the stakes had to be raised higher, as the story's world didn't seem brutal enough to need Psychwatch. Hence, plenty of deaths all across the moral spectrum.
6. Psychwatch and Commissioner Mason were supposed to be unambiguously good. Mason was supposed to be a benevolent, well-respected authority figure who treats her officers with kindness and respect, and Psychwatch wouldn't have been the controversial agency it eventually became. However, readers instantly distrusted both of them just by the end of the first chapter, quickly referring to both of them as creepy and invasive. This worked in the story's favor, as Psychwatch ended up better representing both society's mistreatment and alienation of the mentally ill as well as law enforcement's improper, oftentimes hostile interactions with mentally ill individuals.
7. Yes, the Multi Man would've been Margo's missing father. I changed that because that would've been the most predictable thing ever.
8. The Rabbit Hole would've been more like an underground brothel rather than the depraved circle of Hell it ended up being depicted as, and (while high on Wonderland Mist) Jack would've seduced and had sex with a woman who'd turn out to be the founder of the Rabbit Hole. Somehow, the place would've remained not only intact, but also in business, and Margo would've discovered she was schizophrenic another way.
9. Royce, Andrade, and Slater were added last minute to the story. I had no notes for their backstories or character arcs the way the other characters had until halfway into the story when they became incredibly significant.
10. The ending would've gone on far longer, with a lot more happening between the siege on the Multi Man's hideout and his death. Specifically, he would've been arrested, forced through a pointless interrogation, put on trial, and eventually escape into the Psycho Slums before getting gunned down by Margo, Carl, and Jack. This felt like it would've dragged on too long and was instead shortened down to what you read in the final two chapters.
11. Overall, here are some things that were guaranteed to happen once I decided to take on a darker, grittier tone and present Psychwatch as far more morally ambiguous:
- Margo having schizophrenia.
- Ellie being a hallucination.
- Margo having a missing father who turned out to be abusive.
- The infiltration of the Rabbit Hole.
- The Multi Man breaking into Psychwatch, killing Holden to raise the stakes, and kidnapping Margo.
- A final showdown against the Multi Man that concludes in Margo defeating the Multi Man herself (although, Carl was originally planned to die rescuing her; this was changed following the love and positive reception he received from readers, not to mention the fresh idea of giving a character with DID a break for once).
- Jack's death by Mason's hands (although, she was originally going to get away with it, back when she was planned on being a more heroic character).
And one more fun fact: I plan on creating a screenplay based on this story! I think I'm leaning towards a miniseries adaptation to really allow the world to come to life and allow each character to complete a compelling arc rather than a simple feature film. So be on the lookout for the next ten years or so! And don't let Netflix cancel it a week after it comes out...or whoever puts it out.
And now that the facts are done, here are some questions for you guys!
1. Favorite character?
2. Least favorite character?
3. Favorite moment in the story?
4. Most shocking moment in the story?
5. Are there any changes mentioned above that you wish were incorporated into the story you read? Any you're glad didn't make it in?
6. Any suggestions for the next draft apart from the ones that were mentioned above?
7. Any questions you have for the author?
8. And finally, your overall opinion of the story?
Once more, from the bottom of my heart, thank you so much for taking the time to read this story. You guys inspire me, and you give me reasons to love reading and writing. I hope you all have an awesome day!
And stick around for more cool things from me in the future! Once again, have an awesome day!