ONE YEAR LATER
Grief is a funny thing.
It makes you wild, stupid, angry, and impulsive. Yet, in the moment, all I felt was nothing. Not even as I watched the pleasure fill this random guy's eyes I met at the club last night as we grind on one another from the restroom of the club to my apartment, hands all over each other, lips all over any part of skin. The night is barely rememberable and I don't know if it's because nothing excites me anymore or if I was just too drunk and high to remember.
The days all seem to fade into one anyway, the only change being my outfit and whatever guy finds himself in my bed the morning after. Today's victim is not necessarily my type but when are they ever? Blemish-free russet-brown skin and a fade are the first things to greet me when I open my eyes. The guy is still asleep, a lanky arm hanging off the side of the bed as he snores obnoxiously into the pillow, mouth wide open and saliva dripping from his lips.
I grimace at the scene before rolling over so I won't have to stare at the random guy in my bed. I reached for my phone on the bedside table, disregarding all the missed calls and text messages from people, and checked the time to see it was nearing 3 pm. I try not to glance at the date on the calendar but my eyes can't help but follow it.
Today makes a year since the incident or as the order likes to call it The Amaranthus Massacre. A year is crazy. It seems way shorter in my head. I can close my eyes and still see the blood, practically smell the metallic taste, and hear flesh tearing in my ears like I'm still there at the scene of the crime. I wish I could back to that day. I wouldn't go back to try to stop it or anything because I know I couldn't have and I more than likely would've ended up like everyone else, but that probably would've been a better option for me. Every day is like reliving a never-ending nightmare.
After all the interrogations, meeting with Madam Dahlia, and then another questioning with The Order, I was finally free to go back to what I was used to. The order did nothing more than ask the same questions that everyone else asked and I eventually got tired of repeating myself so many times.
Who do you think did this?
Where is your father?
Where were you that night?
It solved nothing because the case is still open, but the trail is cold. It always has been and probably always will be because they can't even find my father or at least his body in the wreckage. I don't know what to make of it, and I try not to think about it too long because then I enter a dark hole that I've fought so hard to get out of. That's why I hate whenever it gets too quiet and I'm left alone with my thoughts because my mind starts wondering and asking questions that just don't need to be asked.
One thing I have learned through all of this: life goes on.
It sounds less harsh in my head than whenever I say it aloud but it's true life goes on whether you want it to or not — dead or not, times clock doesn't stop ticking for anyone. The first week was the hardest. Having to stay down in New Orleans for a week to have a funeral ceremony for 30+ people isn't exactly the easiest thing in the world. Watching what's left of my culture, my family, and my coven go up in flames and burn down to ashes is something that'll stick with me forever. If I empty my mind and push thoughts of loss and anger away, sometimes I can still smell the flames. The scent of the Amaranthus coven is a peculiar mix of the flower we're named after and dried leaves, the combination is like perfume to me, especially after all these years I've spent in a city filled with exhaust and smog.
I left Louisiana immediately after the funeral ceremony and collected a few things from the house like some of my father's textbooks and belongings because apparently knowledge has no price according to members of the order and a few family photos he had lying around his office. I got Rina's ring too. I haven't taken it off since I left a year ago because it's nice and it's the only thing I have left that feels close enough to my siblings. I remember her saying it's supposed to provide good health but I've caught a runny nose like three times since I came back so I don't know what that's about. Nonetheless, the ring is a nice accessory to have with its marquise-cut clear quartz bounded by silver.
The sudden knock at my front door distracts me from my inner thoughts and I don't know whether to be thankful or annoyed that someone is at my apartment this early in the afternoon. The guy beside me on the bed exhaled a low groan as he tousled around in the bed, shoving his head under the pillow at the knocking on the door that only seemed to grow louder by the second. I throw the bed sheets off of me with a huff of air exhaling my nostrils. I scan my bedroom floor for the nearest pair of underwear and put them on.
The knocking continued.
"God dammit, I'm coming!" I yell at whoever is behind the door.
If it's my fucking landlord I'm gonna punch him in the face. He's been on my ass lately about rent these last couple of months. Since that shit happened a year ago and with my father out of the picture and still nowhere to be found, money has been a little tight for me as of late. I'm pretty sure I've used up most of my father's fund he had stashed away for emergencies which I'm pretty sure is money he was given from The Order. I've never had a job before and to be quite honest the thought of working was never really something that interested me so if the landlord is here to get on my ass about that I'm knocking him upside the head.
There's another knock and then another.
I gritted my teeth. "Chill the fuck out!" My voice grew louder as I swung open the front door of my apartment however I was not met with the lanky pale-faced landlord I was used to seeing. The person behind the door isn't lanky or pale and instead very brown — skin the color of cinnamon. He also isn't lanky in the slightest. Broad shoulders and a muscle build that stands a few inches above me are the first things to greet me when I open the door.
The man looks down at his sharp nose at me, eyes equally as cutting. "Who the hell are you?" I didn't give him a chance to speak.
His light eyes lock on my brown ones for a moment, but then his nose scrunched up, his eyes darting towards the inside of my apartment and then back down to me. It's only then I remember I'm only in my underwear in front of this strange man but it didn't seem to bother me the way it clearly bothered him, his eyes and head turning in the opposite direction so he wouldn't have to look at me. There's a familiarity to him somewhere in my mind but I can't place a name to his distinctive features.
"Ymir Amaranthus," He says my name with no pause or hesitation like most people do when saying my name which lets me know he's said it before, maybe a few times in his life. He raised a sharp brow at me. "I hope I wasn't interrupting anything important." he finally said but from the almost disgusted look on his face, I can tell he didn't mean that.
"Who the hell are you and why the hell are you at my door?" I asked growing impatient.
"Can you tell whoever is in there with you to leave so we can talk?" He asked and I raised a brow at how he knew I had someone in my apartment.
"There's no one here. So can you leave." I flashed a quick condescending smile before slamming the door in the guy's face, but he quickly stuffs his foot in the door stopping it from slamming shit in his face.
"You're a terrible liar," he pushed back against the door so hard I nearly stumbled over my own two feet in the process. "I could smell the stench of the both of you from the moment I walked into the building."
Smell? I gave the guy another once over taking in his shape features, sculpted jaw clenched so hardly I'm sure he would break his teeth. Almond-shaped eyes so brown and bright they made him all the more intimidating. It's so obvious what he is and I felt a bit stupid that it took me so long to figure it out, but not only is he a wolf he's the one of the ones that interrogated me a year ago — the alpha's son if I remember correctly. He's bigger now, shoulders wider, chest bigger to the point I can see the outlines of his physique underneath the black T-shirt he wore. I could call him out for wearing something clearly too small for him but we're interrupted by the guy from last night stumbling past me with his clothes in his hands.
"Sorry, I'm just gonna head out," he slides past us sheepishly in nothing but a t-shirt, underwear and socks, jeans, and everything else still in his hands. "I'll call you tomorrow, yeah?" he sends me a small wave that I don't mirror and I hope he got the answer he was looking for. However, when he turns to the wolf whose tall muscle build towered over his own he pauses in his steps a bit. He seemed to shrink inside himself as he tried to play off the awkward interaction, trying his hardest not to make eye contact with the wolf whose furrowed eyes never left his.
We watched him scurry down the hall before the wolf turned his attention back to me. "He seems like a real charmer," he says with a smug.
"What the hell do you want?" I didn't find his sarcasm amusing.
"I was sent here by The Order to come talk to you."
"Tell The Order they can kiss my ass." I scoffed, trying to close the door in his face again but his foot stood in the way again.
"Can you just listen . . ." He let out a low sigh, using his forearm against the door to open it more, his strength overpowering my resistance against the door. He inserts a hand through the opening between us, a black envelope laden with gold detailing in his hands. "this is from The Order. I was tasked with delivering it to you."
I looked down at the letter and then back up at the wolf standing in front of me. "Why they'd send you? We don't have messenger ravens anymore?" I asked snatching the envelope from his tattooed hands.
"Because I'm one of the few bloodhounds at Kromnore." I raised a brow at his answer. Bloodhound? Kromnore?
He must've read the confusion on my face because he spoke again. "A bloodhound is a type of shifter that has the ability to track anyone no matter how far or how many worlds away from just a single scent of their blood. I can also smell through your bullshit." his top lip raises into a sly smirk and I wanted so desperately to smack it off.
"If you needed my blood how the hell were you able to find me?"
He made a face at me. "Do you really want to know that," it was my turn to return the deadpanned expression at him. He let out a small sigh. "you're the last Amaranthus in the world. It's not that hard."
I chewed on the side of my cheeks at his words. I moved my focus to the letter in my hands. Sealed with the symbol of The Order, there was a part of me that wanted to discard it - if I weren't the least bit curious as to what could this possibly be about. I broke the waxen seal, and the sharp woodsy scent of an amaranth greeted me as I did. Within is a handwritten letter, written originally in a language I wasn't familiar with but as I stared at the words they reshaped into whatever language I'm most comfortable with. English.
"The Great and Noble Order that has kept balance in the realms for centuries invites you to attend the Remembrance Day for the Amaranthus coven. The 30th marks a year since the tragic passing of our brethren and their noble sovereign Erik Amaranthus went missing, and as we hold a day of remembrance we'll also observe the traditional funerary games in preparation for the grim truth: he may never return.
Join us at sundown at the Kromnore Academy.
Long through the night, we light candles to guide our dear brother Erik home, and long through the night we await his return."
-The Order
My grip on the letter tightened once I finished. I was free to do whatever I wanted with the letter once I read it again, the information within was something I couldn't shake. The dates, the time, the place, and even the feeling of significance that came with the message. An unnerving dryness took over my throat, and my chest tightened air barely seeming to seep through. When I looked back at the paper, it was blank.
"Y-you want me to come to Halence?" I finally look up to meet his stare.
"It's the Order request."
"Tell the Order this," I balled my fists to my sides as I opened the door wide enough so he could see all of me as I stepped closer to him. "I'm not going to Halence, I'm not going to Kromnore, and I sure as hell don't want an invitation for a Remembrance Day of people you didn't even really care about because if you did we would know what happened that day and who killed my family."
I turn around on the heel of my feet about to go back inside my apartment. "Ymir, The Order demands that you-"
"Fuck The Order. Now leave me alone!" I raise my hand at him, wrist flickering towards the wolf. His body flies back against the wall in the hallway with a loud thud, the door slamming shut in his face on a whim. I made my way back to my apartment. I tossed the envelope in the nearby trash, watching as it evaporated into thin air.
••••
It doesn't take long for the sun to set and the moon to come and take its place. After the day I had I needed a distraction — a big one. This is why I found somewhere downtown with loud music and even louder people as colorful lights flashed around us. I down the rest of the drink in my hand letting the tequila run down my throat fueling my insides as I swayed to the beat of the music. This is the type of distraction I need especially after the day I had with the alpha son. The nerve of him and The Order for coming to my place demanding I go to fuck ass Halence. I'd rather eat a jean jacket covered in gasoline before I ever step foot in that forsaken realm again.
I wipe my mind of The Order, Halence, and everything else as I let the music blasting from the club's speakers fuel my veins. A body jumps in front of me, his eyes seeming browner than ever in the flashing lights of the club. He wore a yellow fitted cap, which somehow looked amazing on him and accented his mocha skin. A cheeky grin on his face. "I knew those eyes looked familiar," I say, sending him a once-over. It's the guy from this morning whose name still has yet to ring a bell in my head.
"Why did I know I'd find you here tonight," he matches my rhythm on the dance floor, eyes following mine with every beat.
"Because you're probably stalking me," I tell half joking half serious. It wouldn't be the first time a guy found it hard to leave me alone. The boy smiles at me, a bedazzled tooth gleaming. "I just like seeing you," he admits casually closing the distance between us, and I don't fight the smile that stretches over my lips.
I never really understood why society perpetuated the myth that after sex women were clingier than men – give men just a little bit of body heat and they're halfway into proposing if it meant regular sexual intercourse. Men were simple creatures — I would know. I am one who just so happens to be attracted to them as well. That night we met at another club wasn't supposed to be anything more than a simple "Thanks for a great night," and nothing beyond the physical, but this boy was persistent and despite my many times turning him down he didn't know how to leave me alone.
I don't mind it though, he's cute enough which makes him a perfect distraction from my thoughts.
The rest of the night went on as planned, with drinks and more dancing until I found myself getting bored of it. I leave the club barely tipsy with a man on my hip whispering sweet nothings. The moon in the starless sky is my only decent company tonight as I walked on the sidewalk with both my hands in my pockets, the boy beside me talking away in my ear.
"How about a horror movie?"
"Blood and guts are quite literally the last thing I want to see right now." I don't even bother to turn around to face him when I let the words leave my lips. The stillness in my voice would've been enough for the average person to realize I wasn't really in the talking mood but not this guy. He followed behind me still trying to decide on a genre for the film he planned on watching tonight at my place, he just doesn't know that after I get my nut he was getting the fuck out.
"Sci-fi?"
"Absolutely not."
"Historical fiction!"
"You have the worst taste in films, Jesus Christ," I say to him earning a laugh out of him but I was being completely serious. He nudges me with his shoulder as he catches up to me, now walking side by side in the night. He wraps an arm around my neck and pulls me closer. "Who cares I just wanna spend time with you tonight, that's all."
I fight out the groan threatening to come out of me. Oh, brother.
As I walked I felt an uneasy feeling in my stomach. I can't explain it but there's a little tightening in my chest and it's not from his corny words. I look around the empty street sidewalk because of the uncertainty and anxiety of thinking and feeling that eyes are on me, the constant need to turn around and find the source. I did give in, but I saw nothing but the empty sidewalk and streetlights. I exhaled a low breath. I shrugged the feeling off as I began to continue walking beside the boy as he rambled on, this time speeding up my pace.
"Ymir, you good?" He says as he tries his best to keep in step with me, a hand gripping my wrist and keeping me in place for a moment.
"I'm fine," I tell him quickly. "We just need to hurry and get back to my place. It's cold."
I can feel it around me. I know it's there.
There's an electric awareness seeping into my body as if preparing me to run. I can count each hair that stands at the back of my neck. My heart's beat is more than just a thud, it is more than pounding, more than racing. I pause in my steps, extending out a hand at to the talkative to keep him still as well.
He blinks at me. "What—"
"Shh." I hushed him, eyes wandering around the quiet street. I looked up at the buildings over us, scanning for something — anything that could be the source of this uneasy feeling in my stomach. "Ymir, you okay? You're acting mad weird right now." his usual bluntness would've made me laugh under any other circumstances but right now I just really wanted him to shut up the hell up
He furrows his bushy brows at me, eyes narrowing into a pure look of confusion. "What's going on—" there's a quick rush of wind that comes past me. Everything happened too fast for my eyes, one minute he was right behind me and before I could even blink he was tackled into a nearby alleyway by something so fast it left a breeze so strong I nearly fell over from the force.
Without hesitation, I take off towards the alley where he was tackled to see whatever it was on top of him pinning him to the ground. Even under the dim lights from the streetlights, I could make out that it wasn't human. Dark obsidian skin is so rough it reminds me of leather. It's not until I stare harder that I see the rocky skin on its large muscle build, cracks along it glowing a faint red. Its horned head kneels lower as if it's smelling the unconscious boy underneath it. Where a face should be is nothing more than three hollow holes that glow a burning red like lava flowed through it.
"What the fuck–" I managed to breathe out, despite the utter shock my body was in at the scene. Adrenaline almost burst through my skin, eyes wide with fear, and screams locked in my throat. The creature turns its attention away from the boy who's lying under it unmoving. Its rock-like face glows brighter when it lets out a screech so loud my body went numb at the sound, chills traveling down my spine to cold I found myself frozen at the scene for a moment. My eyes dart to the boy underneath it, unconscious still but I can make out the rise and fall of his chest.
I got so distracted that I had forgotten about the creature roaring in front of me for a moment. Unfortunately, I'm painfully reminded when the creature grabs ahold of me with its hard hands, slicing at my skin with ease, and sending me flying forward into the side of the dumpster that occupied the alleyway.
I don't even have time to feel the pain because the creature lunges at me again, but my senses come back just as quickly as they left and I move out of the way immediately. The creature smashes into the side of the dumpster leaving a clear dent in the side. It quickly stands on its legs, almost eight feet in height, and every inch worth the terror it leaves in its wake.
It slashes at me again, and I manage to sidestep just in time causing the creature to instead tear down a few of the pipes that lined the building. I don't think twice about picking up one of the iron pipes from the ground. I inhaled a breath, before thinking 'What the hell?', charging at the thing with the sharpened end of the broken pipe. I was about to pass out from exhaustion, plus the pain of what felt like a broken back but I ran full speed ahead anyway. It's a reckless thing to do, but when has that ever stopped me before?
At least I had the upper hand by surprising the damn thing, who wasn't suspecting the attack. I dug at the middle of the chest right where a heart should be for a normal human being but this thing isn't human. The pipe slicing through its hardened skin did merely nothing but anger it more as it let out another ear-piercing screech. I managed to cut through it but it wasn't deep or fatal enough. I still took pleasure in hearing it scream in pain though.
The creature swung around its arm to hit me and knocked me into the side of the building, my already aching back tensing even more. I fell to the ground with a thud letting out a hiss of pain. I'm aware of the concussion I will probably suffer because of that, but I can't focus on the pain right now. Even with the world starting to spin around me I couldn't give up. I can't have anyone else dying around me.
The creature stomps towards me. Its mouth opens large and wide, rancid drool seeping down its jaws as it launches at me ready to chomp down. I held out my hand, eyes locked on the beast as I tried to channel any amount of destruction magic I could. The blood rushes to my ears and I can feel the hairs on my neck rise the more I concentrate. I held my breath, clearing my head of all thoughts despite the roaring creature charging at me right now. I can feel the magic surging through me, see it as it travels through my bones, bits of magic beginning to spark on my arm but before I can project it on the creature the magic subside. It's as if my body rejected the magic and sent it back to me, a burning sensation erupting through my hand causing me to yell out in pain.
The creature leaps in the air preparing to tear my entire face off. I grabbed ahold of the pipe again, tightening in my hands and turning it sideways just when the creature landed on top of me trying its best to pry down on me but I managed to stuff the pipe between its jaw just before that could happen. It roars more and more as it tries to bite through the iron and I want to gag. The breath . . . the fucking breath!
The creature starts to overpower my strength and I brace myself for what's to come. The snapping of my neck, the tearing of my flesh, and the smell of my blood filled the night's air. I'm prepared, I'm anticipating it but when I blink and open my eyes again suddenly the thing is tackled from the side by something from the shadows. It's hard to figure out what it was since it blended into the night, but then my eyes started to adjust to it and my breath hitched in my throat.
I thought it was a dog, but dogs don't move the way wolves do. A wolf - there's nothing else it can be, but real wolves don't move like that, don't grow that damn big. Its paws are as big as my head. It had the creature's neck in between its sharp canine teeth, slamming it into hard concrete below us and shaking around aggressively like dogs do their toys, except this thing wasn't a toy and it's screech sounded like nails on a chalkboard as it tried to fight the beast, but there's no point, it's head is torn off with ease.
I watched with widened eyes as the beast's darkened body heaved up and down. I could practically feel the heat radiating off of it. It turns around to me slowly, head still in between its teeth, curled up gums to reveal blood-stained teeth, and then it lets out a low rumbling growl when it spits out the head and the creature disintegrates into ash on the ground beside it.
I felt something inside. I knew the confusion was one of them but there was something else — nausea. It felt like my innards were being replaced by some kind of black hole. Nausea crept from my abdomen to my head and it was as if my heart had suddenly stopped beating and all the blood had run down into my shoes. My back was hot with pain, and my entire body felt numb. I just wanted to close my eyes and take a nap...
I suddenly hear the ear-twitching sound of bone-crushing and soft grunts of pain. I don't realize it's the werewolf in front of me shifting back into its human form until I see bone twisting through the skin. If I didn't already feel like throwing up that definitely would've done it. I immediately look away from the grotesque scene using my hand to shield me.
"Ymir Amaranthus . . ." I hear my name being called a few moments later. I lower my hand but only a little and thank God because the man is naked but I think he cares about that at the moment. I turn my head away again before I can see anything I don't want to see. I can hear the man speaking but his voice fades in and out as I try my best to fight off the sudden urge to close my eyes, vision blurring. "still want to decline that offer on coming to Halence?"
Of course, it's him. I lower my hand just enough to where I'm not seeing anything unwarranted but even still I can see the alphas of the Pack Of Saint's son standing right in front of me bare. "You couldn't bring any extra clothes." I force up, feeling my fading in and out of consciousness.
"Such a smartass for someone who would've been dead if I hadn't arrived," He retorts, he rambles on more but his voice is fading in and out. "God dammit, you're about pass out aren't you?" I hear him say. I held up a hand as if that single motion were the catalyst to keep me from falling. "W-wow, thanks for stating that Captain O-obvious." I managed to get out one last remake before I fell on my face and let the darkness consume me.
••••
EXCUSE ANY MISTAKE OR ERRORS