[A/N: For everyone that asked about where the League was at, I hope that last chapter hinted that they're laying low for the commission. Basically after Hosu they realized what they were doing was constantly getting out shined by Revite so they decided to wait till he was dealt with. At that point AFO told the commission to deal with him faster, hence why they order Hawks to kill him really suddenly.
Y'all have no idea how many times I wanted to reply to questions about LoV but couldn't cause it would spoil the stuff with AFO and the Nomu's -- which had a LONG ASS lead up, jfc. Glad that's out of the way.]
Izuku is safe. Dabi knows this as he helps guide him back to Sutorimu and Akito's place. He knows he's safe yet he can't help but feel something is wrong. It shouldn't be, but it is, and he can see it in the way Izuku looks surprised every time he looks over at him, like he wasn't expecting his friends to be walking beside him. He sees it in how his shoulders are tighter than normal even as his head hangs; how his fingers twitch.
Dabi doesn't know what to do.
When he'd crashed into him on that balcony, he'd been so happy and relieved he nearly forgotten to send a message to the rest of their group saying they could fall back. When they had pulled away from each other, grins wide and chests rattling, he'd pressed three times into the feather Hawks had given him - three for we got him.
No later was he running far away from the commission with Izuku and the two prisoners he dragged along with him. As they went, heroes sped past them also on retreat. They ran until the top of the commission building was out of sight and Dabi's staples felt ready to fall out. Hawks caught up to them and touched down beside Dabi.
He watched as his eyes landed on Izuku and lit up, like he almost hadn't believed Dabi when he said he was safe. Izuku wasn't looking at him though. Instead, his gaze was trained on the ground, a little fold between his brows.
Hawks frowned and leaned closer to Dabi, whispering, "Is he okay?"
"I don't know," Dabi admitted. "Once we stopped running, he didn't say anything."
He didn't dwell on how Hawks' steps faltered for a moment. However, Hawks is a professional at faking appearances and forced a broad smile. He jumped over to Izuku and bumped him with his wing. "Hey, Midoriya."
Izuku's eyes snapped up to his, widening. He sputters, "H-Hawks! You're here!"
The hero grinned even more. "'Course I am."
Dabi observed as his eyes traveled over Hawks' new look. His wings were their usual blood red but his coat was now a black matching in colour to Dabi's own outfit. His headphones were gone and his visor had a grey tint to it instead of yellow. Even the yellow patterns on his shirt were now white. Hawks had told him he'd never had a choice in his outfit. Now, with Akito's help, he could pick something new while still sticking with the parts he liked.
"I like the change," Izuku mentions, waving his hand towards the black coat.
Hawks gives a twirl and dramatically bows with an extended hand. "Why thank you."
Dabi's chest warmed but he pushed it aside as Hawks moved to walk next to him again. He faced backwards so he looked the rest of their group head on. There was a split second where his grin fell before it picked up again.
"Hello again, Ayumu-kun," Hawks greeted, a little bit of his fake honey voice chipping away to reveal an emotion Dabi didn't want to think too hard about. He knew Ayumu and Hawks would be acquainted, had heard so from Ayumu herself, but it didn't sink in till then what that meant for both of them. They were remains of a past he figured neither of them wanted to relive.
Ayumu had been a surprise to see on the balcony. He'd guessed she was involved with the commission again, likely against her will, but he didn't think she'd be with Izuku. It was fine. He could work around it.
The woman only waved halfheartedly in response to Hawks. Hawks wasn't deterred by it and moved on to the random man walking with them.
"Hey, I'm Keigo," he introduces. "You must be Charlie, yeah?"
The man offered a quiet smile. "That's me."
Dabi didn't deal with Charlie a lot outside of online conversations, but from the few in person conversations he did have with the man before he met Izuku, he knew that he wasn't acting like himself. The Charlie he remembers wasn't shy like this. That Charlie knew his place and value, and made it everyone else's business to know too. This version of him felt more real, more vulnerable.
Maybe he is more like Hawks than he thought; putting on a brave face and fake ego to navigate the lives of villains more easily.
"You looked better without the cracked lenses," Dabi joked. Charlie huffed a short laugh.
"Where are we going?" Izuku asked as they kept walking. "The flat is the other way."
Dabi glanced at him with a smirk on his lips. "Trust me, where we're heading is a lot nicer than our place. It has heating."
Hawks snorted. "Like you cared about the heating. You're a living furnace. Midoriya and I are the ones who suffered."
"You more so with your quirk," Izuku tacked on.
"I didn't tell you that," Hawks pointed out with a twisted expression.
Izuku simply shrugged. "I guessed."
"How?!"
"If you have to ask that then you're hopeless."
Hawks squawked even though Dabi knew he was well aware of how Izuku figured out his quirks traits. Dabi found himself thankful for the warm atmosphere he brought, bringing a teasing smile to Izuku's face when it had been a frown before. He's glad Hawks can help Izuku where he can't.
It's not much longer before they reach Akito and Sutorimu's place. Dabi knocks on the door only for it to swing open on the second rap of his knuckles. Akito stands in the doorway with a wide grin. Dabi feels himself being shoved away as the support technician dives at Izuku. Her arms wrap around him faster than the boy can react.
"Mido! Good to have you back!" she cheers, continuing to squeeze the life out of him.
Izuku looks stiff in her arms. He looks over her shoulder at Dabi with frantic eyes but he makes no move to help him. He deserves to endure Akito's tackling for how much he scared them.
Akito beamed at them as she finally untangles herself from Izuku. Her gaze slides to Charlie and Ayumu, and while she still grinned it visibly dampened a tad. Dabi understood. Knowing there were others who'd been held with Izuku was unsettling to say the least.
"Hello," Akito greets, leaning her hip against the door frame. "What other rascals has Mido scooped up this time?"
To Dabi's surprise, Charlie is the first to move. He awkwardly extends his hand out to Akito like he's unsure whether he made the right move or not. He couldn't help but notice how he stumbled over his tongue as he murmured, "Charlie. My names Charlie. I'm--"
"I know who you are. Lots of stories 'bout you," Akito cuts off. She doesn't shake his hand but rather slaps it and snaps her fingers in a fluid motion. Charlie appears baffled. She looks to Ayumu. "And you?"
"Ayumu." She does not extend her hand.
Akito raises a brow and Dabi just knows she's about to start something. She has that same gleam in her eye as when she unlocks her door - like she's bracing a challenge and knows exactly how to solve it.
"And your first name?"
Ayumu blanks, her expression souring. "What?"
"Hun, if we're going to be trauma dumping and living together for the next while, might as well act like we've known each other for longer than a few minutes." Akito smirks. Dabi wants to groan but he takes note of the small smile on Izuku's face and holds back. The kid needs all the enjoyment he can get. "So, first name?"
Ayumu looks about as shocked as she had been when Dabi first mentioned he worked with Revite to her. It only takes her a moment before she smooths out her surprised look into a feign disinterest. She states simply, "Yuriko."
"Great! I'm Sana. Lets go draw you a bath, Yuriko. This way."
The poor woman is grabbed by the wrist and yanked inside by the unstoppable force that is Sana Akito. Charlie sighs and quickly follows after them. Dabi didn't watch them leave. His eyes were trained on Izuku as the boy slight grin dropped again. He shrugged and stepped into the open door saying, "Guess that means we should go in."
Dabi barely suppressed a flinch at the way his tone felt fake. It reminded him of Hawks; how when they first met every word he spoke was laced with lies and distractions. He acted so wild to cover the truths he felt. And now, Izuku was doing that too. Someone might as well just sucker-punch Dabi in the gut at this point.
The five of them entered the house and Hawks guided the newcomers to the living space. Automatically, Dab surveyed the room before quickly settling into his place on the the couch next to Shouto. The room was packed, as usual lately, with the Todoroki siblings each occupying a different set of furniture, Sutorimu sitting at the coffee table, and the Yuuei students sprawled across the carpeted floor. The all held a tense air to them, like they were holding their breath, and it only worsened when Dabi walked in. He didn't understand why until he looked back to the entrance and saw Izuku's expression.
The boys face had shifted into one of horror - the kind that appears on children when they find their first goldfish floating upside down in it's tank. His green eyes were blown wide and his shoulders were held so tightly Dabi could practically see their muscles straining through his shirt. Dabi watched as his gaze skipped from the faces of his classmates to the family he'd helped, looking increasingly concerned.
In a flash, he scrambled to yank his hood over his head and duck back into the hallway. Hawks' wings snapped out, blocking his escape. Izuku only seemed to panic more as he pulled his hood tighter over his features, but not before Dabi caught a glimpse of the terror in his eyes - a sight he hadn't wish to have seen.
"Whoa there, kiddo!" Hawks exclaimed, hands coming to rest on Izuku's shoulders. "Hey. It's okay."
When Izuku didn't say anything, preferring to curl more in on himself, Hawks looked to Dabi. Dabi shook his hands and gave a look that said, what do you want me to do? only for Hawks to nod towards Izuku roughly.
Sighing heavily, Dabi got up from his seat (so long Shouto-preheated cushion) and paced towards Izuku. A knot of unease worried at his insides when he stood in front of him. He looked so small like this; like an actual kid.
Dabi can't help the wave of guilt that hurls at him every time he remembers Izuku truly is just a teenager. He forgets it just as the world forgets their burdens affect the young. Izuku always shines to brightly that it feels criminal to diminish him as just an age, even if his age means he shouldn't be the one to go through all this.
Right then, his light in hardly there, revealing the mere 15 on his identification. All eyes are trained on him and Dabi knows the others can see the cloud above his head too. Since he collapsed in his arms at the commission building, Dabi's known something was wrong. It only got worse when they stepped in to see his friends.
Dabi wishes someone would tell him how to help.
"What's the matter?" Dabi asks, attempting to make his tone less harsh than usual. He wants to show he cares but he's never had that skill.
In a voice that holds back all too much, Izuku whispers, "They can't see my face."
He's trembling; his arms quivering in an almost unnoticeable way. Dabi realizes with a start that bringing him in here without warning was a mistake. He'd forgotten that he didn't know everything for once. He'd been in the dark - locked away - for the past few days and was now thrust into a situation that enveloped all the recent changes. His friends, which should have been comforting, are a daunting reminder of secrets that Izuku didn't know they were privy to.
Dabi glances at Hawks where he stood behind Izuku. He saw the same concern and understanding he felt reflected in gold eyes and downward tilting lips.
"Izuku," Dabi says slowly. The responding squeak of surprise the boy gives doesn't go without note. "They know."
Izuku's head snaps up, hood sliding back from his eyes. He shakes his head. "No. No, they don't."
Dabi moves his hands to rest atop Hawks' on his shoulders. So many layers of scars there from his burns to Hawks' scraped knuckles and Izuku's burdens.
"Hey. Are you calling me a liar? 'Cause I don't lie," he says. "Shouto told them. We needed people to help find you and they were it. I know. . . I know it isn't fair - that it should have been you to tell them, but we needed to get you."
When Izuku only continued to stare at him with big, green, watery eyes, Dabi gently pulled down his hood. He smiled at him, or at least tried to. He ruffled his hair, a piece of him reveling in the familiar action that he hadn't known he'd missed doing.
"Shouldn't wear that. It'll fuck up your mop of hair even more than it already is."
Izuku's eyes flickered to the others over Dabi's shoulder as he asked, "Is it true?"
"It is," Shouto's voice answered. Then, "I'm sorry for sharing your secret. I wanted to help."
"It's. . . " Izuku seemed to scramble for words before he shook his head. "No. I get it. I'm not mad. I - Well, I just don't know what to say."
"You don't have to say anything." Dabi stepped aside to see Komori speak up. "We're just glad you're safe now."
The tears in Izuku eyes welled even more. "You guys really don't mind? Revite is-- I'm a pretty controversial topic."
It's a good thing that everyone shook their heads at this, otherwise Dabi would have to start a new body count list.
"We care about you," Sutorimu said. "And we admire who you are as Revite."
From the floor, Shinsou nodded. "You didn't judge me for my quirk."
"You helped my family," Fuyumi said, her lips twisting into a soft smile.
"You're our friend, Midoriya," Kaseki tacked on. "What kind of friends would it make us if we turned our backs on you because of one little secret?"
The first of tears fell from Izuku's eyes. He wiped at them, mumbling, "Sorry. I'm just a little overwhelmed."
"Prepare to be more overwhelmed then!" Komori exclaimed before pushing past Dabi and wrapping Izuku up in a hug. Dabi barely had time to shift out of the way before all the others joined in. Even Shouto participated leaving only Dabi and Hawks to linger of the sidelines.
Dabi watched as they all exchanged words of apologies, thanks, and welcomes with warmth easing into his chest. Izuku's smile was ridiculous wide as he cried and clung to his friends, and all Dabi could think about was how the boy deserved a thousand times the love these people could give him. While they thanked him and shared how happy they were to have him back, he hoped Izuku was believing them.
"He's going to be okay, y'know," Hawks murmured to him. The group has pulled apart and Kaseki is retelling how they found him with grand hand gestures and wild eyes. The others chip in from time though Hatsume remains mostly focused on fussing over Izuku's cut lip.
Dabi idly questioned if he could read minds as he answered, "I hope so."
Izuku laughs at something Kaseki says.
He really hopes so.
After Hatsume finishes fixing Izuku up - with the help of Sutorimu and Hawks - Akito bursts into the room claiming there to be dinner set out for them. He's never seen Izuku look so relieved at the mention of food. Dabi walks with him to the kitchen, bumping shoulders with him and asking, "Glad for the break?"
Izuku startles a little before relaxing. His shoulders sink and he nods. "It's not them. Just, it's a lot."
"They're happy you're safe," Hawks says, coming to walk on Izuku's other side. "We all are."
The corners of Izuku's lips quirk up but there's something about it that unsettles Dabi. It doesn't look right. Not wrong, but not right. He can't pin point why.
As they pull up to the dinning room where everyone's begun to take their seats, Hawks tacks on with a flap of his wings, "And hey, what you did with my feathers? That was smart of you! You guys didn't even need us!"
Izuku flushes and ducks his head. "It wasn't anything. We wouldn't have made it out without you."
Ayumu steps into the room with a pot full of rice and sets it down on the table. Her damp hair takes out some of it's typical curl and drips onto her fresh set of clothes. She scoffs and says, "I mean, sure, we needed their help but we wouldn't have been saved on that alone. It's your plan that got us to safety."
"Hold up," Shinsou cut in. "One, what feather thing? Two, is that why the heroes where called away early? And three, who's the tag along?"
Ayumu's lips curled back into a sneer. "I'm not a 'tag along'."
"Her name's Ayumu," Hawks said, crossing his arms. Dabi caught the way he nearly tripped over her name. "She was in the young heroes program with me."
"Doesn't explain why she's here," Kaseki points out through a mouthful of food.
"She was trapped with Charlie and I," Izuku explains.
"Charlie." Komori stood up so fast that the sound of her chair scraping against the floor scratched at the innermost parts of Dabi's ears. "Where is--"
"He's in the guest room, kid. Go see him if you'd like," Akito says, jabbing her thumb in the direction of the hallway.
Dabi's spent his fair share running out of rooms but he doesn't think he's ever left one as fast as Komori does then. He can empathize to some degree. He didn't exactly sit and wait for Izuku to come to him back at the commission building.
"You only answered one of Shinsou's questions," Natsuo says once she's gone.
It's then that Izuku and Ayumu regale how they escaped. The two of them take turns sharing how their day started and turned into chaos. Dabi found himself impressed with Ayumu's quirk as the story went on. Pride bloomed in him when Izuku's use of knocking the guard out came up. He was glad to finally fill in the blanks of how the three of them had gotten out on their own.
When they're done, the room is painfully quiet. Despite all the marvels they achieved, it was still hard not to focus in on the idea of them being locked in cells. The little hints they dropped about how their stay had went were the worst parts. Nothing clear enough to fully understand, but enough little references that Dabi could imagine a general idea of what had happened.
The rest of the room had figured it out too if their silence said anything. Of course, silence is always broken.
"When you said Damaso pulled you aside to talk about Nomu's before the alarm rang, what did you mean?" Kaseki piped up.
Ayumu visibly stiffened, her fingers turning white where they griped the edge of the table. Izuku blinked owlishly at Kaseki.
"What?"
Kaseki clarified, "Like, what do you mean Nomu's? Why would the commission want to talk about those things?"
Dabi realized that there's a reason Komori is always at Kaseki's side: to keep him from saying stupid shit.
Ayumu and Izuku said nothing for a long moment. The air around them fizzled and Dabi couldn't help but think of a ticking bomb. Kaseki lit a match that couldn't be put out, only observed as it's spark drew closer to the catalyst of the inevitable explosion. Dabi held his breath.
What had happened to pull this sort of reaction from them - tensing shoulders, daunting looks of horror, shaking hands and white knuckles. While he hates the reaction it pulls from Izuku, Dabi too wants to ask more. What was wrong? What really happened in that building? What did they know that the rest of them didn't, and how does Dabi stop it from affecting them?
"They were. . . The commission controls-- I mean, makes or funds or--" Izuku abruptly cuts himself off as he stumbles over words. His eyes shine with the beginning of tears. "They planned on making us-- I don't know. I think at least, Or--"
"It doesn't fucking matter," Ayumu jumps in, glaring at the whole table. For a second, her eyes flashed purple; long enough that Dabi could see it but short enough that he wondered if he imagined it.
The silence from before felt like feathers in comparison to the weight of it this time.
What happened to you? Dabi's thoughts begged forth.
Sutorimu cleared her throat, drawing everyone's attention to her. She forced a smile. "Ayumu's right, it doesn't matter right now. All that matters is that we're all safe."
"They know my identity," Izuku exclaims suddenly. His eyes are wide. "They'll find my mother and hurt her because of me. She's not safe."
Sutorimu reached across the table to rest her hand over Izuku's. "Midoriya, trust me when I tell you she is. All of our families are being watched by the heroes who helped you three get out. All Might himself is looking after your mother. He said he owed it to you."
The poor boys lips wobbled but he looked somewhat relieved. "Does she know I'm okay?"
Dabi didn't think Sutorimu was capable of having eyes that looked so soft as they did now. She nods. "You can call her on my phone if you'd like?" Izuku nodded back. "All right. You can call her and then go to bed. We have a long day ahead to come tomorrow. Everyone, I suggest you do the same. Ayumu, you're with Sana and I in our room. Midoriya-- Dabi and Keigo will show to your shared room. Todoroki's are in the second door down that hall. Students, you're in the living room with Charlie."
Their group scattered, each person scrambling for their designated area. If Dabi's learned anything from living with Sutorimu in the past few days, it's that she is to be listened to at all times.
He waits for the woman to hand Izuku her phone, telling him to keep it for the night, then shows him to where Hawks and him have been staying. The step into the room and Hawks immediately jumps onto the bed, spreading out his wings. He groans as he sinks into the pillows.
"Man, my wings are not having it today," he whines.
Izuku eyes him oddly, then glances at Dabi. He raises his brows. "You've both been staying here the whole time?"
"Yeah," Dabi answers then narrows his eyes. "Why?"
"Oh nothing. Just, y'know, there's one bed and two of you."
Hawks does a spit take, wings jerking violently, but Dabi only glares. "Shut up, gremlin. It wasn't like that."
"Ehhh. . ."
"Keigo, not helping."
Izuku tilts his head. "Why is everyone calling you Keigo?"
Hawks sat up on the bed, shrugging. "Hawks isn't fitting with me too well right now, so I've been introducing myself as Keigo."
"Huh. You should call me Izuku. I think we're past formalities at this point." Izuku's lips curled up into a small smile.
Hawks' feathers ruffled, something Dabi's learned means he's pleased. He sat straighter and said, "Well then, Izuku, do you want Dabi and I to leave while you call your mom or. . . ?"
"Stay."
Dabi is surprised by the desperation in his voice. Izuku's always left the room when he talked to his mother before. He wants to ask why; wants to dissect every action of Izuku's till he can find the source and eradicate it. Instead, he stays.
Izuku sets up the call, placing the phone on speaker. He sits beside Hawks on the bed, leaning into the man's wings. Dabi sits on the other end with crossed legs, listening patiently to the phone dial.
After three rings, Inko Midoriya picks up.
"Hello?"
Izuku's eyes water and his hands shake. Dabi watches as he opens his mouth but words fail to come out. Dabi realizes if Izuku is going to have them sit here, he might as well try and help him.
"Hello, Midoriya-san," Dabi says.
There's a sigh from through the phone before Inko speaks again. "Oh. Dabi. How. . . Is Izuku alright?"
Dabi side eyes the kid in question. "He's here with me."
"H-Hi Mom," Izuku manages to say. His voice is small.
"Izuku!"
Dabi hates the way Inko's voice sounds: how it cracks and oozes relief. He hates that she has anything to be relieved about in the first place. Dabi can't imagine what the last few days have been like for her, nor does he want to. He's ached enough missing Izuku himself.
Looking at Izuku, he knows the boy ached more missing all of them. It's painted across his face in the dark bags under his eyes and the frail way he holds himself, like he's ready to cry at any moment but won't let himself. He's missed them. Dabi wishes he hadn't, at least that would mean he would not hurt.
When did he start to care so much about others hurt?
"Are you injured? Is there anything you need? Are you okay?" Inko rushes.
Izuku hangs his head. "I'm okay, Mom. Don't worry."
How could she not? Dabi watches Hawks' wing curl around Izuku's shoulder. How could we not?
"Young Midoriya," a new voice echoes through the phone. "Is that you?"
Izuku's head snaps up. "All Might."
"What have I said about calling me that, young man?"
"Yagi-san," Izuku corrects. A flicker of a smile crosses his features again. "I'm glad you're looking after my mom. I'm glad she's safe."
"It is us who are glad for your safety," All Might comforts.
Tears fall from Izuku's eyes. "T-thanks."
Dabi and Hawks let Izuku talk. His mother and All Might do most of the conversing from there on. They tell him how they're doing, his mother cries and makes sure he knows how much she loves him, she forces him to promise to call everyday. Izuku nods his head and speaks in small chunks of words but keeps up with the conversation. He accepts every promise and returns every bit of affection.
Hawks and Dabi stay there the whole time, offering comforting squeezes and sympathetic looks when needed. Dabi desires to do more for him, but knows he can't.
After a certain amount of time, the call is ended with Inko telling her son to rest. Hawks uses a feather guide the phone out of Izuku's hand and onto the night stand. Together, the three of them ready their selves for bed in silence. Izuku is granted the bed while Hawks and him take the floor.
When the lights flick out, Izuku's voice carries throughout the small room as he whispers, "Thank you. For everything."
Dabi's chest pulls tight as he stares at the ceiling. He says, "Go to sleep kid," and hopes Izuku knows what he means.
It seems, as those around him close their eyes and turn out for the evening, all Dabi can do is hope.
-:-
That night finds Izuku in the backyard.
From where he sits criss-crossed on the grassy lawn, he stares up at the stars and the black abyss around them. They're hardly visible in the city, he discovers. Barely even glimmer spots in the sky; it leaves a lot of endless black. He supposes even a blank canvas like a city sky is better than what lurks behind his eyelids.
Sleep was much too hard to get at the moment. The breeze welcomed him, cooling his rampant nerves and tucking him away from the heat building in his chest. It was better than closing his eyes and seeing expanses of purple skin. Claws, yellow eyes, wings, exposed brains. Every time he thought to shut his eyes he saw flashes of them and would snap awake again.
Really, that night finds Izuku too awake.
He thinks if he listened hard enough, he'd be able to hear the sounds of his friends snoring underneath the busy honks of cars and the electrical hum running through every inch of the suburbs. It's not like hearing Charlie's even breaths like he could for the past few nights.
It should feel better. At least it doesn't feel worse.
--living, breathing then ripped, shredded, sewn back together in fragments of parts and pieces and--
He looks to the sky. He takes a deep breath.
Izuku lives by a lot of things his mother says and right now he lives by clinging to her belief that air is the medicine for the heart. He feels it travel down his throat and settle in his lungs, both light and heavy. It rinses away his thoughts for a brief period of time, and brevity is all Izuku really needs.
He's been yearning for this alone time since he arrived. Though grateful for everything his friends have done, he needs the space. They are too plentiful, too loud, too curious for him right now. Everything has been so loud lately. He just wants quiet.
"Are you alright?"
Izuku near jumps at the sound of another's voice. He manages to only flinch before looking over his shoulder and taking in Shouto standing at the back door. He hadn't heard it open.
Shouto, for all that people compare him to extremes, is a neutral he hasn't ever been prepared for. Now, he stands in the dull glow of the patio lights with messy hair and loose bed clothes. His shoulders are slumped with an exhaustion Izuku understands, and his eyes don't drift from his. Two toned. Grey and blue. Kind and blunt. Neutral.
Izuku nods. He doesn't tell him to go away. Shouto is quiet enough for him.
He comes to sit next to him, plopping down on the plush grass and turning his head skyward. Some of his hair mixes so much that it looks almost pink in the patches by his hairline. He thinks his eyes look a little more tired up close.
"You can't see the stars," Shouto says in the same tone someone would use when noting the time.
Izuku frowns. Without much thought, he asks, "Did Dabi send you out here to check on me or something?"
Shouto's eyes slide back to him. "Do you want to be checked up on?"
And that - well, that is the real question, isn't it?
There's a part of him that wants to scream for all the world to hear that what he saw wasn't right. It demands to declare he couldn't understand what he'd been told. It said it was sick, and cruel, and evil, and something he can't bare alone. He doesn't want more nights like these where he drifts into backyards to run from dreams that don't feel much like dreams anymore. That part cries at him to reach out and grab the first hand he finds - to get some semblance of comfort from the people he loves. It wants to be checked up on.
There's another part of him though. A side that takes everything he's learned, shoves it a box, seals it tightly and throws it all into the ocean. That part doesn't want to be checked up on because checking in means there really is something in that box and maybe there's something in his brain that might never go away and maybe-- no. No, it doesn't want to talk because it doesn't want to think about any of those creatures, or the names he knows, or the lives that have been lost, the pain of a boot stomping down on his ribs, the sound of a friends scream when they're shocked.
It's not a very simple question to answer. To be checked on or not.
"So you told the others I'm Revite," Izuku eventually says, and he thinks that's answer enough.
Shouto, thankfully, only watches him for a moment or two before nodding. He leans back on his hands, head lolling to the side as he looks at Izuku. He responds, "I'm sorry for sharing your secret."
He wishes he wouldn't sound so upset.
"That's not-- I didn't -- I'm not mad," he tries to say. He sighs, resting his chin on his knees. "I wasn't trying to make it sound like that. You don't have to be sorry. I'm glad you told them. I just-- well, I was trying to say I'm impressed you were so confident in my identity that you told people about it."
Shouto's lips twist into a lopsided smile. "I knew it was you."
Sometimes Shouto says things the way most people wouldn't. Words fall off his tongue with a tone they're not often put with, or he changes his phrasing to an unexpected kind. It knocks people over. Izuku likes it.
He feels knocked over himself as he lets out an undignified squeak and blurts, "The whole time?"
"No. Not until Hosu."
He hummed. That was still quite the time.
"What gave me away?" he asks.
"You're bad at not being you," Shouto states like it explains anything. He lazily points at the Revite hoodie still draped over his shoulders - the one he can't seem to take off. "Even in a disguise and with a voice changer, you're still undeniably kind. You care about everyone; about my family and me. You're analytical, you defend good heroes and call out bad ones, you said to Iida exactly what Revite had back in the hospital, you're reckless. You were still Midoriya even if you were calling yourself Revite."
Heat spreads across his cheeks, a sharp contrast to the chilled breeze outside. He nuzzles into his knees further and contemplates sinking into the ground. He hadn't of thought Shouto paid that close attention to him.
"Okay, sure, but how would you know beyond that? There could be multiple people out there who act like me!" he defended, hoping to cling to a shred of his dignity.
"There's no one like you." Shouto held his gaze for a moment longer before he looked back to the stars. "Besides, there was plenty of evidence pointing your way. Your relation to Dabi, for one. Once that was out in the open I knew for certain but I had my guesses before that. Your familiarity with Hawks during Hosu was suspicious. Same with All Might. And how you showed up at the USJ. Also, Revite never used a quirk as far as anyone could tell and you're quirkless so that was another point. And you knew way too much about my family from one visit. And--"
"Okay! Okay!" Izuku exclaimed, swatting his hands in Shouto's direction. His cheeks felt alight with embarrassment. "I get it! Tare apart my confidence in secret identities, will ya?"
Shouto's brows drew together as a frown appeared on his face. "You should be confident in you identities. I wouldn't have noticed if I hadn't been paying so much attention to you."
Stiffening, he let those words sink in. He'd been paying attention to him? His fingers twitched as he thought of all the possibilities why. Hope swelled in his chest, grasping at his already strained heart strings. A different set of maybe's then before flood his mind. If he'd been watching him, what else did he see? Why was he watching him? Was it for the same reason Izuku's heart picked up pace for or--
Shouto cleared his throat. "You, uh, yeah. You did fine at hiding it. No one else figured it out from what I saw."
--maybe not.
Izuku offered him a small thankful smile despite the way his chest clenched. "Thanks. For the reassurance. And saving me."
"No need to thank us. We did it because we wanted to. Besides, you didn't need us to save you."
I did need you, he thinks and the following thought sounds too much like Damaso. It belittles him just the same. He pushes it away and turns to the invisible stars. The sky grounded him again.
While he came out with the intention of being alone, he can't help but find comfort in Shouto's presence as they sit in silence. Izuku's life may be chaos at the moment, but Shouto is steady. He's quiet in all the noise, and he allows Izuku to simply sit. They don't talk for a while. Not about the whether, not about the past few days events. They sit.
Dabi had asked him what Shouto and him talked about back when the Hosu incident had just resolved. Izuku had listed a lot of things but what he hadn't shared were the words they never needed to speak. He knew what Shouto was thinking and feeling just by being out here with him now. Shouto knew the same about him then too.
Dabi hadn't asked him what he liked about Shouto but if he had, Izuku would have said this.
After a dozen minutes passed, Shouto shifted in his position and finally spoke again: "Can I ask you a question?"
Izuku pondered for a few second before nodding.
"Why Revite?"
He tilted his head, raising a brow. "Because the world needed a Revite."
"No." When Shouto shook his head, his hair swayed with him. The white side of it popped in the dark, like something out of place. Like if there was a single, bright, pale star among the sky's black. "Why the name Revite?"
"Oh."
He didn't think the name mattered at this point. Of course it mattered in the beginning, he knew that, but he figured that now it was just a label. Who cared why he chose it when it now meant so many good things to people across the country? After all, what's in a name?
A glance Shouto's way reveals the boy truly wants to know. His eyes stay trained on Izuku, waiting patiently for a response. Izuku gives in for he is weak, and possibly because he's been waiting for someone to ask him.
"It's short for 'revitalization,'" he clarifies. He sits a little taller as words begin to fall from his lips without his control. "Which some dictionaries define as the process of making something grow, develop, or become successful again. Other dictionaries say it's 'the action of imbuing something with new life and vitality.' Both fit well, I guess, but if you look into the definitions of the word in the second one you find that imbuing means 'to inspire or permeate with', and vitality means 'strength' or the capacity to develop. I want to inspire, and give strength, and change, and make the world grow and be successful. I want to revitalize the hero system. So, Revite."
He winced when he finished talking. Hands coming up to cover his face, he spews, "Ah! Sorry, I'm rambling again. You probably didn't want that in depth of an explanation. Oh my gods."
"You really thought about that."
Hesitantly, Izuku peeks through his fingers. Shouto is watching him with a warm look, his eyes trained on him and his shoulder relaxed. Slowly, Izuku lowers his hands.
"Um. Yeah, I guess I did," he said.
Shouto smiled, a small one yet so grand in how it took hold of his breath and pushed down on his lungs. His scar was barely visible in the shadow his body cast.
"I like it."
Izuku smiled back. "I'm glad."
In the night with a hundred problems pushing at the doors of their minds, they both kept the entrance locks on in favour of this short peace. Quiet understanding just for them that doesn't have to mean anything beyond a their words; nothing that delves deeper into politics and failed systems and complicated families. Here, there is no court case against a hero, there is no angry government after them. Nothing but them.
Izuku is more than happy with that as he sinks into warmth and lets himself pretend there are stars visible beyond the light pollution.
"We should rest," Shouto says, and surprisingly the bubble of content surrounding them doesn't pop.
Izuku sighs and nods. Shouto stands, offering a hand to help him up. He takes it and allows himself to be guided inside. He doesn't want to sleep, not yet but he figures he might as well try. They walk together till they're outside Izuku's shared room.
"If you need anything--" Izuku starts but is cut off.
"You're there. I know." Shouto's gaze drifts to the floor. "You're always there."
"Actually, I was going to say Dabi's always willing to be a maid, but sure."
Luckily, Shouto seemed to understand that joke as the corners of his eyes crinkled with his smile. He tilted his head forward, whispering, "Goodnight, Midoriya."
"Goodnight, Shouto."
Izuku slipped into his room, leaning against the door when it shut behind him. He took a deep breath, releasing it slowly then pacing towards his bed. He stepped over Hawks and Dabi, trying not to snort at their ridiculous sleeping positions. Dabi was half under the bed with drool escaping his mouth and Hawks was on the other side of the room spread as wide as he could. The tips of his expanding wings bent against the walls.
Izuku tucked himself under the beds cover, rolling on his side. He closed his eyes for a moment--
tearing apart sewing together ripping killing turning skin to bruise and quirklessness to overload
--then opened them again. His fingers felt numb at his sides.
Suddenly, his phone lit up on his nightstand. He reached for it and unlocked the screen.
Shouto :D
In case it wasn't clear
I'm always here too.
Izuku bit his lip to keep a smile from stretching across his face. He set down the phone and rolled onto his side. When he closed his eyes again, he thought of creatures floating in clear tanks, but a glance at his phone with a message on it, or the floor with two people who'd kill to protect him, or the hall with friends who were safe, and he gathered the courage to close them again.
It took a hundred tries before his mind gave way to blank sleep, but it was something. That was all that mattered.
[I asked my sister what she would hypothetically say if she was trying to comfort her crush through text and knew they couldn't sleep, and she got so excited that I might have a crush only for her face to fall when she realized it was for fanfiction. I am her biggest disappointment.
Anyways,,, thanks for reading! Only 3 more chapters to go!]