The following night, after a long day of trying not to bring up all my doubts and disappointments, I waited for Mary to help me dress. She never came. I finally changed into a pale blue gown without any help and sat in front of my mirror to make a start on my hair.
No matter what I tried, strands kept escaping my attempt to arrange my hair into a simple chignon. How was I expected to survive the season when I couldn't even manage my own hair? As desperation rose, my bedroom door opened and I twisted around in my seat.
"Nelson, you're here," I said in relief as the maid entered.
"Your mother had specific needs," was all she said, which was more than enough. "Allow me to take over, Miss Burnham."
"Mama was being demanding. I know her all too well."
Nelson undid my attempt and went to work. "Yes, I suppose you would." She gave a huff and shook her head. "I'm going to be completely honest with you. We can't keep doing this."
Oh. I should have known that was coming. All the other maids had made it clear I was beyond help. Still, I'd hoped there would be one person who would be able to help me. "I knew I was a hopeless case."
The maid raised her eyebrows. "That's not what I said. I meant that we're going to have to try something different with your hair."
Though I felt relieved at her clarification, I couldn't think of what she was referring to. "But what else can we do?"
"We can discuss it sometime when you do not have to go to the opera." Nelson threaded a ribbon through my hair, one that matched my gown. "I would like you to give me permission to alter a few of your dresses."
My dresses?" I repeated in surprise. "Why do you want to alter my dresses? Miss Blair swore it was in the latest fashion."
All of my gowns had matched the fashion plates exactly. The one time I'd suggested that perhaps a simpler dress would be in order, Miss Blair and Mama had ignored me. I didn't have the experience to know what was fashionably acceptable, after all, so I'd accepted their decisions. What else could I have done?
"The latest fashion, maybe," Nelson said, her tone kind. "But I think a different style would fit you better. Trust me, Miss Burnham, I know what I'm doing."
Oddly enough, I believed her. "Oh, thank you, Nelson!" I twisted around in her chair and grabbed her hands. "Mary thinks you're the next best thing to a miracle worker."
My words seemed to shock her into momentary silence. Then, she cleared her throat and shook her head. "Well, I don't know about a miracle, but I will do what I can." She pulled her hands free. "Now, Miss Burnham, it's time for you to attend the opera."
"Yes, it is," I said, unable to keep from smiling. "I hear it's going to be a magnificent performance."
She placed my cloak on my shoulders and tied it securely. "Enjoy your evening, Miss Burnham."
"I can't wait to hear what you plan to do," I said before I hurried out of her room. My mind was a whirl as I thought of just what Nelson could mean.
Mama, dressed in her usual pink gown, was waiting for me. Somehow, she was always the one waiting. "There you are, Eugenia," she said, seeming not to be concerned about the time. Her gaze swept over me and she raised her eyebrow. "I wish you'd worn something a little more...impressive. The Opera is where one goes to be seen. How will anyone see you in that drab thing?"
"Would you like me to go back up and change?"
With a sigh, Mama shook her head. "No, there's no time. I'll have a word with Nelson when I return. She cannot be making these mistakes."
If I told her Nelson had only had time to help with my hair, would Mama blame Mary? As much as I hated to see someone unjustly accused, I couldn't risk Mary being dismissed, and Mama would do something unreasonable like that. I'd seen her do it before.
So, much to my shame, I remained silent.
****
As someone who had been looking forward to the music, I was shocked at how much talking and moving about occurred during the performance. Despite it all, I was determined to enjoy what I could, and I kept my gaze on the stage, though I knew Mama wanted to join others who were walking. It was only during the intermission that I allowed myself to look around me.
There were several faces I recognized, even if I could not recall the names immediately. It wasn't hard to spot Miss Ramsey and Miss Bywood with the tall Mr. Talbot near them. They appeared to be enjoying themselves.
"Come, Eugenia, let us walk and greet our friends," Mama said, getting my attention. "I cannot focus on the production."
She'd never been fond of music or singing, so I was amazed she had lasted as long she had. The fact that she'd even spent the money for the box was astonishing. As it was difficult to hear anything as it was, I nodded and rose. We hadn't gone a step, and I realized there was someone at the doorway.
"Why, Mr. Landon," Mama exclaimed. "How wonderful to see you again."
Mr. Landon gave a bow. "Mrs. Burnham, Miss Burnham, are you enjoying tonight's opera?" he asked when he straightened.
"Who would not, though I know Eugenia has been looking forward to tonight for some time," Mama said with a laugh. She looked beyond him. "Mrs. Winters, how good to see you tonight. Please excuse me, Mr. Landon."
With a nod, Mr. Landon stepped aside to allow Mama to pass and then stepped closer to me. "Is this your first visit to the opera?"
"Yes, although we have attended the theater twice since the season began," I said, somehow able to speak clearly while being thrilled that he had come to our box to speak to me. "I had not expected quite so much talking, I must admit."
"Yes, we are a rowdy bunch," Mr. Landon said with a slight laugh. "Still, it's to be expected, I suppose. This is the place to be seen, you know, not to enjoy the arias."
"How do the performers stand it?" I wondered, turning my gaze to the stage. "They are putting their all into this production, and yet no one appreciates it. It must be frustrating to them."
Again, Mr. Landon chuckled. "I've never quite thought of it in that way before, but you are no doubt right. I would be discouraged if I were in their place. Perhaps I would even give it up entirely and walk off the stage to make a point."
That outrageous statement drew a laugh from me. "I think I would like to see that."
"I believe the next act is about to begin," he said as others began to retake their seats. "I shall look forward to when we next meet. I hope it will not be so long."
He bowed and left the box as I tried to understand what he had just said. So long? Then, he hadn't seen me the night before? I couldn't believe it was possible!
"Shall we expect a happy announcement soon?" Mama asked as she sat next to me.
"Mama! You mustn't say such things," I said, even though I shared her hopes. I knew better than to say them aloud. "You know how disastrous rumors can be. It would be sure to keep Mr. Landon from wishing me to marry me."
Mama sniffed and faced away from me a much as her seat allowed.
****
Though I wished it were Mary, since the maid knew me better, it was Nelson who helped me undress. "You seem happier tonight, Miss," she commented as she removed the pins from my hair.
"I suppose anyone is allowed to be a little melancholy now and again."
She shook her head as she picked up the hairbrush. "Was there a reason for such melancholy? More than feeling as though you were carrying your family's fortunes on your shoulders?"
How had she remembered that? It had only been a day, and I'd forgotten I'd confided that. "Oh, no. I'm certain I was merely overthinking," I said, with a smile. "Mama and Miss Graham inform me I do so too often."
Nelson raised her eyebrow. "Isn't it better to overthink than not to think at all?"
"Other young ladies do not seem to think so."
To my surprise, Nelson let out a slight laugh. "True enough."
I couldn't hold back my curiosity anymore. "Nelson, you said you thought a different style would suit me. What exactly did you mean?"
"I meant exactly that," she said, her tone amused. "I've taken the liberty of removing a couple of gowns from your wardrobe so that I may show you." She hesitated for a moment. "And tomorrow, a hairdresser will arrive to do something with your hair."
"A hairdresser?" I couldn't help but think of the unsettling gentleman who usually came to dress my hair. "What could he possibly do?"
"Well, we won't know until he tries, will we?"
Her tone was a matter of fact and, of course, she was right. I wanted to look my best, and I'd tried just about everything to do so. "When will he be here?" I asked, hoping I would have some time to resign myself to the idea. Heaven only knew how Mama would react to the plan.
"I expect in the next two days I will receive an answer to my note."
"Is this someone your former employer used?" I asked curiously. Who had she worked for before? I had the feeling Mama had told me once, but I couldn't think of it.
Nelson kept her eyes on my hair as she braided my hair. "You could say that. He's kind and very good at what he does. He will have you looking like a diamond of the first water, and you won't recognize yourself." She paused. "You do want that, don't you?"
To look not like me? "Yes," I said quickly. "Have you...did you mention this to my mother?"
"I think this is something we'd best keep between ourselves."
I could not agree more. "She doesn't appreciate surprises."
"Why am I not surprised," she said almost too low for me to hear. She cleared her throat. "If there's anything I know, it's that when you like the way you look, you will feel as though you can take on anything."
"I can't think of anything I need more than that."