Rain water was slashing against the bedroom window. Mika's unit was warm but it was cold outside. It was February... a miserable Monday morning in one of the coldest month of the year. They have been back from Africa for two weeks... two horrible weeks which had left the secretary feeling as though she was living in no man's land.
She pulled on her rain boots and took her raincoat from the wardrobe... not quite as loath as she had been in the previous days because Vic Galang would not be there today. She was spending the day at their factory in Batangas. She was actually looking forward to her boss's absence... the atmosphere would be normal for once— as far as Mika was concerned, that is. For everyone else, things were running very smoothly at Galang and Galang. Kim Fajardo was back in her old routine and so was her secretary, Desiree Cheng.
Desiree, normally a very talkative girl, had said little about her broken engagement. She had told Mika merely that things had not worked out as she'd hoped... that she and her fiancé discovered they were not right for each other.
Mika knew the feeling only too well. It was obvious to her that Desiree was still suffering over it— something else Mika could sympathize with because she was suffering in a similar way. She feels that her relationship with Vic had disintegrated totally. They communicate but fail to reach one another.
During the past fortnight, she had on two occasions acted as hostess to dinner parties in the penthouse. They were entertaining foreign visitors on both times and the evenings had gone well. Ever the gentlewoman— or responsible employer— Vic had taken her home afterwards, but she had said very little and she had not stepped foot inside her unit.
Mika had long since given up trying to reach her boss. For the first couple of days in the office (since their return from their African trip), she had try to make things "normal". She had been perfectly natural. But her boss does not seem to reciprocate her efforts. Kung hindi masungit, over sa pangdedeadma.
How much longer the secretary would be able to stand this, she did not know because she loved her boss more than ever. During their stay in Africa, Mika discovered different facets of Vic Galang.... her sense of humor, her sense of fun, her appreciation of life, her being childlike at times... how beautiful she is inside and out. The discoveries only deepened her love to the extent that life with her now was almost unbearably frustrating and depressing. But life without Vic was unthinkable.
There had been one hour... just an hour... last Friday when she had thought that their closeness was going to be recaptured. Vic had come to her office with her children, after having collected them from school, and they all had snack together. Later, however, she learned from the twins that it has been their request to see the secretary because they wanted to invite her to their birthday party a week on Saturday.
The party was to be held at the Galang Family Home in Alabang. Mika really wants to go but had not given the girls a definite answer. She felt guilty. But her acceptance of their invitation depended so much on Vic's attitude towards the idea. She had told them she would let them know and that she might have to go her brother's house in Bulacan at the time of the party. She explained to them, truthfully, that her sister-in-law was soon to have a baby and that after the baby's birth, she was going to help them out for a week. She told Vic of this when she requested for a week-long leave, she had merely nodded her agreement.
Vic has not given her reaction to the twins' invitation to her. She took her children upstairs after their snack and had not come back to the office. Mika plans to ask her tomorrow, if it was OK for her to attend the girls' birthday party.
"Mika, can you spare me a minute, please?" Kim Fajardo stuck her head round the door ten minutes after Mika has arrived at the office.
"Good morning, Kim. Of course I can. Vina, would you look after the switch for a while?"
She considers herself lucky to get on so well with her colleagues. There was little she would not do for Kim. She finds her very nice. Vina Alinas, on the otherhand, was an enormous help. The younger secretary had mastered her job extremely well and was very capable as Mika in most respects.
As she followed Kim into her office, the thought crossed her mind that if had to leave the company, Vic would have Vina to fall back on until she find a suitable replacement. Capable though, Vina lacks the experience and sophistication necessary to be secretary to the MD and Chairman.
"This is a very short notice, I know," Kim said as she waved Mika into a chair. "... but I need a huge favor."
"Fire away. I'll help if I can. Malakas ka ata sa akin. Ikaw pa." Mika replied with a playful wink.
"Well... I've been let down by someone. I have to attend a dinner party tonight. It's a charity thing, you know and I need an escort."
Mika's instinct was to say no. This has nothing to do with business and... what the hell! "I'll be glad to go with you, Kim."
"You will?" Kim expected she would be turned down again. She tried her hardest not to grin. She did not know what had gone on between Vic Galang ang Mika Reyes-Ravena during her absence from the office and during their trip to Nairobi. But Vic had been like a bear with a sore head since she had come back. Quizzing the MD and Chairman had got her nowhere at all and it would no doubt be the same if she ask her beautiful secretary questions. Her secretary! Why the devil had not Vic taken Desiree on and left Mika in her own job? Des would have coped splendidly working for the MD. But Vic had given her virtually no say on the matter. She made it appear that her stealing Mika to be her secretary was the ONLY solution to solve the problem of Cienne's vacated post... more like a fait accompli.
There was something in the air. Kim would have considered it romance only Vic was often in a foul mood these last days. 'Di ba pag-inlove happy mood dapat? As for Mika, that gorgeous smile of hers was a rare sight these days. This night out will do her good... though she had a strong feeling, Vic would not like it one little bit. Too bad!
"I did ask Desiree, but she said she already made plans for tonight."
For some reason, the information made Mika feel better about the idea. But why not do Kim this favor? What had she to go home to? it was not as if there were anything — or anyone— who needed her attention after she finished work.
In a matter of seconds, the date was fixed and she went back to her office. She had been in the office for fifteen minutes only but her boss' absence was something she felt acutely. Things were just not the same when Vic Galang was not around. She would rather have Vic and an awful atmosphere than no Vic at all. Why did she have to fall in love again? Why did she have to fall in love with her employer? Working here, there was no escape for her. She could not distract herself from her pain in any way at all because, present or absent, Vic's personality surrounded her here— in her office, in the work she was doing for her, in the very air itself.
It was three in the afternoon when Shiela Pineda came in and made things worse for the secretary. Both Vina and Mika looked up as the door to the corridor opened. People normally knock before walking in. Well, not this visitor. She was petite, curvaceous, immaculately dressed woman with regal air about her and a smile on her undeniably well maintained face. She walked into the office as if she owned the entire company...
Mika's stomach gave a sickening lurch. This visitor did not need to identify herself. Still she treated the woman with what she hoped was appropriate detachment.
"May I help you? I'm afraid Miss Galang is not here today. She is at the..."
"I'm aware of that." Shiela Pineda's voice was sexily harsh and controlled. "I'm Miss Pineda... Miss Shiela Marie Pineda. I believe we have spoken on the phone."
For the first time in her life, Mika knew what it was to feel jealousy. She felt an irrational hatred of the woman, which somewhat upset her terribly. What an awful emotion to feel! After all, she could not blame Shiela Pineda for... for existing.
"Yes we have, ma'am. What can I do for you, Miss Pineda?"
The smile was still on her face. She placed her hands on the desk, leaning closer to Mika so that Vina would not be able to catch her words. "So you are, Mika Reyes-Ravena, Vic's new secretary."
It was not a question but Mika answered as though it was. "Yes ma'am, I'm Miss Galang's secretary." The woman's scrutiny was almost offensive, shaking Mika's composure visibly. What was this all about? What did she want exactly?
"Is there something I can do for you? I mean since you are aware that Miss Galang is not in today..."
"Just a message I want you to give her. I happened to be passing so I thought I'd call in and kill two birds with one stone."
"I'm sorry?"
"I thought it's time you and I meet. Vic mentioned your name to me, so I thought I'd call in and say hello. You are aware that I am a friend of hers?"
Was she ever! "Yes, Miss Pineda, I am aware of that." Mika looked at the other woman only to find there was a smug smile on her face.
"About that message— just tell her I've been called away on business again and that I'll be back in a few days. I will try to ring her this week-end. Nice to have met you, Mrs. Ravena."
As soon as she heard the door closed, Mika escaped to the ladies' room. Even Vina had thought it to be a strange encounter. She had immediately tuned to Mika and asked what it was all about.
Mika splashed water on her face. She was flushed and burning inwardly with anger and loathing. What on earth had Shiela Pineda's visit been about? It felt very much as though she had called in merely to give her lover's new secretary the once-over. Of course she has no evidence that back that up. Mika would be hard pressed to complain it to Vic. No! She had to forget the idea— Vic would think of her as crazy... or jealous... and that was the last thing she wanted.
Vic did not react when she was given the message. At nine on Tuesday morning, Mika delivered it coolly and with apparent impartiality. Vic merely shrugged as if it was unimportant to him. Mika was somewhat confused. She still did not know how serious Vic's relationship with Miss Pineda. But she would not dare ask her boss about it. It was still a continuing affair and that was all she needed to know.
"Just a minute." Vic's voice halted her as she was about to leave her office. She took an envelope from her desk drawer and handed it to her. "Ronnie and Rachel wrote their party invitations during the week-end. They asked me to give this to you... so it's now official."
"Yes, I..." She faltered, looking down at the childish handwriting on the pink envelope. "I wanted to have a word with you about this."
"You are not going to let them down, are you?" There was sharpness in Vic's voice but at least it seemed she was in favor of her going to her children's party.
"Well... I don't want to... No! I am very fond of the girls and I am flattered that they have asked me."
"They like you very much, Mika."
Something in Vic's voice made Mika look at her. "Can I take then that you won't mind my going to the party?"
"Mind? I want you to, Mika..."
"Then it is settled. I would like to tell them myself. Can I ring them at their school? After class hours, I suppose?"
"Of course. I'll give you their number..."
"I have it. It is in the phone book I inherited from Cienne." She felt suddenly close to tears but she had not the faintest idea why. "Uhmmm... If Julie... my sister-in-law is out of the hospital by the time of the party, mom can spend the weekend in Bulacan. My brother will..."
"Has she gone to the hospital? Your sister-in-law?"
"No. She is still at home. The baby is due this Saturday according to the doctors."
"Why can't your mother spend more time with her? What about her own family? Do you really need to take a week off?"
"Julie has no family of her own. My mother can't take a week off just at the moment. She helps my father. In the morning, she works as his receptionist. Besides, a four-year-old and a new baby would be a bit much for her. She is not that young."
"And you feel you can cope?"
"I would love every minute of it."
"Indeed!" The boss's tone drew the secretary's eyes back to hers again. "You are not feeling broody, by any chance?"
"Hardly!" Mika got to her feet, finding the conversation disturbing. She feels the good dose of sarcasm in Vic's last question.
"Wait a minute!"
Mika's hand dropped from the door knob. What had she done now? Why was the boss suddenly angry? Very much angry, judging from the tone of her voice. Of course! She was making the old mistake of walking out of her office before being dismissed. Damn you, Vic! There are times when I want to throw myself into your arms... and there are times when I just want to run as far away from you as I can. She turned to look at her and was startled by the coldness of her eyes. What on earth had she done to upset her now?
"Kim tells me you had a date with her last night."
"I would hardly call it a..."
"That you had dinner together at Edsa Shangri-la."
"Well, yes. But it was hardly a date. I ... we were not alone. It was in aid of charity and..."
"Since when have you felt charitable towards Kim Fajardo?"
Ang sungit! May regla ba 'to?
Mika blinked in confusion. It sounded as though Vic Galang was jealous. Impossible! Her boss was misunderstanding deliberately. Kim must have mentioned what last night's dinner party was in aid of. Or had she?
Anyhow, just in case Kim had left a room for doubt, Mika explained, not pausing to remember that she did not have to justify her actions to Vic or anyone else.
"... and the only reason she took me with her was because she had been let down by some other woman."
"Did she take you home afterwards?"
"Of course, she did." Mika saw her boss' face tighten.
"Did she make a pass at you?"
Mika was so surprised by the question that she was not able to answer fast enough. Akalain mo, naisip nya 'yon? Before she had a chance to gather her wits, Vic's fist smashed violently against her desk and got to her feet and grabbed her.
"Answer my question, Mika." She shook her so hard that she almost lost balance.
"Vic, I... let go of me! You are hurting me!" She yelped when she felt the boss's fingers tighten in her arms. "No! Of course not! She did not make a pass at me. What the devil is the matter with you? Think! Just think about it! She is still my boss."
"So what? She fancies you like mad... always have done. You must be well aware of that!"
Mika was beyond angry. She was livid. She was appalled at her boss... at her suggestions... at how wrong she was. "I am aware of no such thing. I don't believe that for one minute. In any case, what business is it of yours? What difference could it make to you?"
Vic pulled her secretary against her furiously, both hands gripping her painfully by the shoulders. "I'll tell you what difference it makes to me... I'll tell you what business it is of mine. I want you... and that makes it my business! I..." In split seconds her hold on her loosened and she held her very close against her chest, her voice switching form anger to softness just as quickly. "I want you... I want you, Mika."
Mika put both her hands up and pushed herself away from her boss. She was at a loss to understand her... except for her last remark. "That, I am aware of! Now, may I please go? Have you quite finished with me?" She turned her back, not caring whether Vic had finished or not. She had quite enough for one day.
"Wait! Please, Mika..." Vic spoke on a sigh and it was just as effective as her anger in making the secretary obey. Mika turned frowning. Vic had moved to the window, was standing with her back on her, her hands shoved deep in her pockets. "Will you spend this evening with me?"
"No, Ma'am Galang."
"Why not?" She did not turn around. "You spent last evening with Kim. Why can't you spend this evening with me?"
"You know the reason for that."
"I said evening, not the night."
Aba't namilosopo pa.
Mika bit her lip, her eyes closing against a new threat of tears. Did Vic think she would be willing to fill-in until Shiela Pineda got back that weekend? Never! She hated her for asking her to... and she love her so much that she wanted to say yes, regardless. Lord, what is happening to her? She was constantly at sixes and sevens these days and prone to outbursts of a temper she had never known she possessed.
"No. I have already made plans for tonight."
This made the boss turned around. "With whom? With Kim? Who are you seeing tonight?" She demanded.
"My father," she said wearily. "He is coming to attend some meeting and he is taking me to dinner after." With that, she walked out of the boss's room.
Mika slumped into her chair just as Vina walked in, which made it necessary for her to brighten up or risk the questions from the younger girl. Vina still had a crush on Vic and had complained about her odd moods these days.
There was one consolation. Vic must care for her to some extent. Her reaction to her having been out with Kim proved that. If only she cared more. If only she cared enough. If only she cared half as much as Mika does. She told her again that she wanted her. So she still wanted her sexually? So what? Was that all she ever had on mind? What a nerve! How dare her question her about her personal affairs? She is free to date other people as she does. How dare her ask her to spend the evening with her as a substitute to the arrogant Shiela Pineda?
.
.
.
Mika's anger disappeared come that week-end. However, thoughts of Vic being with Shiela Pineda evoked a feeling of nausea borne of jealousy and hopelessness.
On Saturday night, she dated her shadow and decided to watch a movie in a nearby cinema. She sat through the entire film she hardly registered and hardly heard a word of. Visions of two people making love were constantly in her mind until she was almost demented by her own imagination. It would not do. She could not go on like this. She decided to hand in her notice of resignation on Monday.
By Sunday, she changed her mind. No! She could not leave. If she stays, she would be able to see Vic every working day. Besides, she had a week off. Maybe the break would help her put a different perspective on things. Maybe she would be able to make a rational decision about her future. With luck, she might even start to care less about Vic Galang if she would be away from her an entire week.
.
.
.
It was Wednesday that Mika's new nephew was born. Her brother Perry phoned her at lunchtime overjoyed, making the usual jokes about cigars and champagne and boys being late. The baby was four days overdue.
"Oh darling, I am delighted!" Mika was almost tearful. "Congratulations, Kuya! Give my love to Julie and tell her I'll see her... when will she come out of the hospital?"
"They don't keep you long in the hospital these days." Perry laughed, clearly feeling on top of the world. "She will be home on Friday."
"Er... you know I'm going to a party in Alabang on Saturday? Miss Galang's children, remember?"
"Yes, you told me. Mind you, it was Vic's children when you mentioned it," he teased "Or are you being overheard?"
Mika was alone in her office, but she did not tell her brother that. "That's right. So cut it out, please." Teasing about Vic Galang was one thing she did not need right now. "Anyhow, I will come to you afterwards. Expect me sometime during the evening. It'll be fairly late, probably."
"Don't worry, sis. In fact come on Sunday if that is more convenient for you. Mom and dad are coming on Friday evening and they are staying till Sunday. So, no sweat!"
"Kuya, for someone who teaches English, you use the most appalling expressions. See you when I see you. Bye!"
"Who uses the most appalling expressions?" Vic walked in as she hung up.
"Perry, my brother."
"There's news?"
"The baby was born forty minutes ago. It's a boy. Kuya Perry is delighted, off course, though he wanted a girl. They have a son already."
An odd expression flitted across Vic's face. "I should think he is delighted. Congratulate him for me when you talk to him again. I envy him... his sons...."
Mika looked up quickly. She had no doubt at all about Vic's love for her daughters. Then again, a son is a son. "You would have wanted to have a son, Vic?"
"Yes. But don't state it in the past tense. I still want it and it's not too late for me. I'm not closing my doors to the possibility. Perhaps my next wife will oblige."
Vic dropped some files on Mika's desk and walk back into her own office without a word. Mika's eyes trailed to the closed door and she bit hard on her lip. She remembers now... Vic telling her she had every intention of remarrying...
OO nga naman... It would be unlikely that Vic would be the one to get pregnant. Butch nga eh. Malamang Mika, it'll be the partner who will get pregnant.