"What are you doing up here?" She turned to look at Tom. He was going to be so disappointed in her.
"Just thinking." It was true she was thinking. Thinking about what she had done. She didn't know if it was the right decision anymore. She turned back around. She couldn't look at him right now.
"I'll let you be alone." Tom said, and Teresa wanted to scream no at him before he had even turned around.
"Do you remember your mother?" Teresa asked. She wasn't going to tell Tom about this. She wasn't going to tell anyone. But she needed him to stay. She fucking needed him so much right now. If Tom turned her back on her now, she wouldn't be able to handle it.
Thomas stopped, and just stared at her for a moment. Teresa wondered if this was a good idea or not.
"I think so." He said. He didn't seemed upset. She wanted to cry. She turned her body all the way around to face him.
"I remember mine." She said. Her eyes. She remembered her eyes.
"She was a beautiful woman," Teresa continued, "everybody loved her. Before Wicked, she was all I had." Thomas looked at her. He didn't say anything and for once, Teresa couldn't read him.
"When she got sick, I didn't know what to do. I just kept her locked up, hidden. I thought she'd get better." Teresa hoped Thomas would understand. She hoped and prayed.
"Every night, she would make these awful sounds. Screams. One night, she just stopped. It was finally quiet." All of the memories were pouring out of Teresa and she couldn't handle it. Tears were falling down her face and she made no move to care. Tom was standing there, and the look on his face was almost pitiful.
"I went down to her room." Teresa paused. She felt shaky as the memories passed her lips. "There was blood everywhere. She was just sat there, calm. Said she was feeling better." Teresa started crying harder.
"The visions were gone, she'd taken care of them." Teresa remembered her mother saying that to her.
"She took her eyes out, Thomas." And Teresa wanted to scream. Thomas was looking at her with such pity. She didn't know if this was what she wanted.
"There are millions of people suffering out there, millions of stories just like mine." She wanted him to understand what she had done for him. So he didn't feel this way. She never wanted him to feel the way she did.
"We can't turn our backs on them, I won't." She stated. She was still crying, unable to stop. Thomas' look of pity turned to confusion. Teresa just needed him to listen to her right now.
"What are you saying?" He asked. She ignored that he just forgot about her mother's death.
"I'm saying, I want you to understand." She said. She needed him to understand.
"Understand what?" And Thomas' face just about broke Teresa' heart.
"Why I did it." She said, and she could hear the helicopters.
Ava promised nobody would get hurt.
"Please don't fight them, Thomas." She said. She didn't want him to get hurt.
"What have you done?" If Thomas had broken her heart before, that sentence shattered it.
-
The entire Right Arm was in flames, people were being taken and running for cover, and Teresa wanted to cry. Ava promised that they wouldn't get hurt.
Explosions left and right had people running for cover. Teresa couldn't see any of the people so she started her venture down. They were all lined up, Janson directed orders left and right. She could see the berg which no doubt contained her.
Ava.
Teresa came towards her, and realized she was standing in front of Thomas. Teresa felt exhausted.
"I'm glad you're safe." Ava said to her, she said nothing back.
"What the hell? Teresa?" Frypan said. She retracted it. She no longer liked Frypan.
"What's going on?" Newt asked. Teresa wanted to scream at Newt that this was what's best for him, that he wouldn't survive any longer. She couldn't let Thomas go through that.
"She's with them." Tom said, and Teresa felt like she no longer had access to that nickname.
"Since when?" Minho asked, and Teresa wanted to punch him. She looked at Thomas again, and he refused to meet her eyes. She wanted to scream and shout and cry that this was all for him.
Everything she did was for him.
"Oh Teresa's always had an evolved appreciation of the greater good." Teresa did not appreciate Janson. "Once we restored her memories, it was only a matter of time." Teresa looked around at everyone. They looked so betrayed.
"I'm sorry, I had no choice, this is the only way! We have to find a cure." She doesn't know who she's saying it to anymore. Minho, Frypan, Aris and Thomas are all looking at her with such hatred it physically hurt her.
"She's right. This is all just a means to an end. You used to understand that, Thomas." Ava said, and Teresa wishes that she was back there again. With Tom, just doing their jobs. She didn't feel as bad.
"No matter what you think of me, I am not a monster, I am a doctor, I swore an oath to find a cure." Ava said. Teresa didn't know what to say.
Teresa looked at Thomas again. That's when she realized. He was planning something. Something big. She could see it in his eyes.
"Hello, Mary. I'd hoped we would meet again. I'm sorry it had to be under these circumstances." Ava said. Teresa said nothing. She just kept staring at Thomas.
"I'm sorry about a lot of things too, but not this. At least my conscience is clear." Teresa felt those words seeping into her. She knew she was a terrible person. But as long as it kept Tom- Thomas, safe.
"So is mine." And a shot rang out and Teresa's ears hurt. She had to have been standing too close to the gun. That's when she realized who was holding it. Janson.
Vince was screaming Mary's name and all Teresa could think was that this wasn't supposed to happen like this. Nobody was supposed to die. Teresa felt like crashing to her knees and just crying, but she stood tall.
Ava was yelling orders and Teresa didn't know what to say. She wanted to just cry.
She looked at Thomas one more time and she realized. Whatever he was planning, was going down. Now.
Thomas hit the guard, and pulled out a bomb. Teresa stepped back and stared at him.
"Get back!" Thomas yelled, and his voice was so hoarse and sad it made Teresa want to hold him in her arms forever.
"Thomas please stop! I made a deal with them, they promised we would be safe, all of us." Teresa didn't see Brenda in all the mess. Thomas had already lost one person because of her.
"What? I'm supposed to trust you now?" Thomas yelled and Teresa flinched.
"It's true, it was her only condition." Ava said. Teresa wanted him to put it down.
Couldn't he see she was doing his for him? So he could be safe. She knew deep down when she made the call, that Thomas would never speak to her again. He would never be her Tom again. But at least he had Newt. Him and Newt and Minho could be happy together and that's what Teresa wanted. She just wanted Tom to be happy.
"Shut up!" He screamed.
"Everything can go back to the way it was! Thomas, do you really want all of them to die?" Ava asked.
Newt, Minho and Frypan all gathered around him.
"We're with you, Thomas." Newt was no longer someone Teresa could consider a friend. He would give no mercy now, and Teresa expected that from him. It still made her want to scream in his face that she was saving his life, but she left it at that.
"No!" Teresa yelled. She stood back behind Janson, hoping to take cover behind him.
"We're not going back there." Thomas said. Teresa could not understand. Wicked would keep them safe from the Flare. "It's the only way."
A loud horn got in the way and suddenly a truck was barreling towards one of the helicopters. Teresa didn't know what to do. A war broke out and Teresa wanted to run to Thomas to explain everything. Ava and Janson ushered her onto the berg, along with the other immunes that already had. The doors shut as Teresa watched Thomas blow up about ten Wicked guards.
-
Teresa walked the halls of Wicked quietly. She had heard from Ava that they had taken Minho. He was the only one. Teresa knew she couldn't back track from this mistake, so she left it. She knew they would be starting tests on Minho tomorrow, and she knew she would be helping with him.
She made it to the room Ava had picked out for her at the new location, and Teresa opened the door and shut it.
She slide down the door and sobbed. Over her mother, over Thomas, over Minho, over Newt, over Brenda, over fucking everyone. She realized she had done some damage. She just wanted to keep Thomas safe and happy.
Because it what world did Teresa exist without him?