In the days after our dance, I found myself stunned, yet somehow left with this inexplicable happiness. Even the most frustrating things couldn't keep me from ultimately being in a good mood.
The ball was a wild success and a few letters were even written to me congratulating me on the performance, which was touching but also a little weird and off-putting since now in a way I have a quite literal mark on this world now.
Kino and I saw each other a lot after that, but in a much more casual way.
Formal dances now aside, he was actually a pretty fun character and reminded me of a happier version of myself. He was as antisocial as Myu made him out to be, at least in the sense that he pretty actively avoided social events. The dance was definitely a one time occurrence.
He showed me around the city one day, fancy carriage ride there and all. I'd been with Myu, but in this case with him, we went to some less major streets, even passing through some neighborhoods and seeing some children as we walked and talked about hobbies and such. We did some window shopping, especially around some high-end clothing stores
I'm not sure how I feel about it but... I really just couldn't stop myself from looking at some of the more feminine clothes. They started to have a strong appeal to me. Not just that, but beauty products like wigs and some makeup and things like that. Perhaps it was how being in that dress made me feel. Perhaps it goes deeper than that.
I can't say I know, but regardless, I for once in my life enjoyed some window shopping, all the while chatting it up with Kino, who honestly seemed happy to just be out and about and socializing.
We tried some local sweets and pastries and checked out a few shops - Kino did most of the talking and really was a sweetheart, the soft-spoken gentle type that just made my heart melt into pieces ------ EVEN THOUGH WE'RE BOTH DUDES!!!
What got awkward was how he kept offering to buy me things until I had to sheepishly tell him to stop since I really don't know how to accept gifts.
As we walked through the city, I couldn't help but notice that he didn't have the recognition that Myu did, which definitely reminded me that he's the indoorsy type. We saw each other a lot inside too. Do not, under any circumstances, take that out of context, or try to read further into that.
Myu and Lasory could only congratulate me at the fact that I was getting out of the house more, and both of them incessantly teased me about my "new boyfriend" even though that's definitely not what we are. What we were, though, was getting closer. Closer to what, I couldn't tell you, but we just clicked together as people, be it as friends or something more. And I'd love to play this off like it's not a cheap romance story and like I wasn't considering us as an actual couple, but, well, I couldn't do that.
The fact that he was of royalty was at least somewhat concerning to me, though, considering their marriages are usually supposed to be political - at least I'm pretty sure that's how it works, right?
When I was home, I started coming along with Myu to her tutoring, though most of the things she was learning, I really already knew, be it scientific or mathematic things I knew from my time on Earth or reading and writing that I somehow know, considering the language spoken here isn't anything like where I came from.
What did catch me by surprise was hearing English a couple times, though I never asked about that. It wasn't often, and normally in a very thick accent, but I did definitely hear some, unless it was some weird translation thing where I thought I heard it but in reality my mind is just confused between two first languages.
Aside from lessons, the princess sometimes asked me about when I planned on leaving. I honestly couldn't answer that for her. I would find a new way to dodge the question every time, but I know she was catching on to me. I can't explain it but it really just gets harder and harder to give her that answer.
One day, Lasory asked to speak to me, and seemed a little more serious.
"I have some exciting news... perhaps somewhat scary," he said, adding a wink at the end since he knew my nature. "King Lockwood Sekari would like to meet with you."
I think it goes without saying that I was at least somewhat, erm, off-put.
"There's some things we'd like to discuss with you, and I promise the time will be worthwhile for you, as well."
"How?"
"It's then that we can explain to you everything behind why you're here - why we took you in, that is."
He smiled, knowing that it would be an ordeal for me, and I, not knowing how to say no, and being the cat whom curiosity so brutally murdered, sighed and agreed to come along.
Almost every night, my ghost friend Lydia appeared, and we got to talking a lot more. She sometimes showed around during the day, and especially loved to mock me when I was around Kino, like when I was looking at girly stuff in the shops in the city -- she gave me an earful then, but I of course couldn't reply to her because obviously nobody else can see ghosts.
During our nightly talks, we both opened up and got pretty deep. I think she saw into some of my memories, but for the most part didn't know a lot about Earth, so I would tell her stories from school, tell her about Gabriel and Sage, my mother, what life was like, how different things were between these two worlds.
Of course, she was totally stunned to know that where I came from was a plain old world without any magic or monsters or anything fancy like that. Just some humans with metal and some explosive powder.
She and I also started to get close. Of course not like with Kino, but we had a lot in common, at least in terms of being bookworms who got the boot in life.
She was also the only one I was able to talk with about what was weighing on my mind. Lydia put it in much simpler terms than I could come to on my own:
"It's your attachment. There's a reason for you to care about this world, and your reasons for caring about the one you came from aren't stacking up anymore."
In other words... I see myself as a part of this world now. I could go back to my mother, and I really want to, but that's all I'd get going back. Here I have people I can consider a family. People who consider me family.
After she disappeared, I lay awake for a while and eventually decided... what could go wrong?
~
I made another important decision that next morning about what I was going to do if I decided to stay here.
Myu and I sat under the rai tree as always, and she made an insensitive joke about me having Kino's children and her being an auntie, and I don't think I've ever been redder in the face. Then she pointed out my face and said that must mean I want the same things, and at that point I just plain erupted with laughter at how careless she was with some of these comments.
"Hey, Lydia?"
"Yeah?" I sobered up from my laugh.
"Do you still want to leave us?" Myu asked, her eyes beady and pleading.
While it's true that at one point I wanted to find a way to get back home and make sure Mom is okay, I've given up on that.
I smiled. "Of course not." I ruffled my fingers through her purple hair. "I'd never leave my little sister like that."
Myu's face lit up when I called her that, and she threw her arms around me.
"Are you gonna be a Messenger for Father?"
I nodded.
She was beaming at this point.
"Really?!" She exclaimed.
I'm happy with spending the rest of my life here with you, sister. Though calling you that might turn some heads being that you're the daughter of Lockwood. I can't say I'm surprised she knew exactly what I was thinking of, either.
I can't keep freeloading here, and there's still so much I have left to see and learn about this place. I don't know what I'll do with this life, but it's a second chance, and it would be just plain out selfish to accept it as anything less.
So to my new sister and to whatever power put me in this situation... thank you.
A few days later, the fated meeting with the King came. I'd told Kino about it, and since he sensed my apprehension, he insisted he come along. I couldn't tell him no, mainly since the idea of him being with me was comforting, and that fact might actually be more terrifying than going to a castle and meeting a king.
It was a sight to behold for sure, tall and grand and ehh.... well... castle. It was also an active one for sure. Loads and loads of people poured into the walls that surrounded it, going to various buildings and subsets of this castle, but what made me nervous was the massive doors that had quite a number of guards all readily waiting.
Something about the guards unsettled me, with their unbroken military stares. I guess it's because I know that they're thinking something behind that stare, and that it could be about me. I'm self-conscious like that.
Lasory and Kino both saw that I was nervous, so they cheered me up a little, saying that this was a fun place to be and there's nothing to worry about. It was at least a little reassuring, but that's king of like putting gas in a totaled car. I mean hey it's got some gas in it... but yeah it doesn't really wanna drive right now.
I don't want to drive right now. I'm the car. There's also no gas in me I couldn't eat this morning this is gonna be a really long meeting holy sh-
Something hit me on the back, and I turned to see a smirking Kino.
"You worrywort! You're fine!" He half-heartedly scolded, and I decided to just let it go.
We entered to everything that should be expected of a royal greeting hall, red carpet, guarded walkway with an audience, throne-with-a-king and all, and while I was the center of the three of us, I walked slower than the other two since I was hoping they'd take the lead knowing that they'd been here before.
They didn't.
In fact, they stopped walking entirely after about halfway and knelt down, but it was clear I was supposed to continue. So while everyone stared, I walked forward a bit more, completely terrified and unsure, and making no effort to hide that on my face.
Eventually the bowing and formalities were dispensed with and the prince and doctor joined behind me while the king and his loud, yet charismatic voice greeted all of us. He wasted little time with formalities, and asked if we wanted to relocate to somewhere more quiet and personal, to which I happily obliged.
Now in a much smaller room with a table and some bread before us, the king began by telling Lasory and Kino to leave. Both of them got up, but only Las left, while Kino just sat in a chair in the corner. I mean I guess it is his dad.
Now faced with the king of the nation, who was also a demon, those of which I only know to be ruthless and cold (my own writing in the past having at least a little to contribute to that perception), I gulped.
King Sakari ignored my nerves and set his hands out on the table, entering a more relaxed position.
"Miss Lydia, I've heard many things of you, but it is a pleasure to finally meet you in the flesh," he welcomed.
In my state of awkwardness, I could only muster out a "you too" and not be able to make eye contact with him. He only laughed, loudly, while Kino couldn't hold in his own laughter behind me.
"Worry it not. I will only take a short few minutes of your time, as you have already granted me many wonderful minutes myself."
I was confused but didn't say anything, only waited for him to elaborate.
"I asked Lasory to take in someone of your nature, with the Scar across your face," he paused and I felt the prominent and heavy mark over my eye. "And I'm afraid to admit that it wasn't entirely just for your own benefit."
I nodded understandingly. "Much of this world and our people, as you know from lifelong experience, is full of hatred towards those with these scars. One of my objectives as a ruler is to snuff out that hateful mentality and bring about a nation within which my people can come to larger advancements as people and as thinkers, and that requires every individual."
The room full of scrawny, chained-up demons and Scarred people flashed before my eyes.
"I feel that a member of my family being one of these minorities would place great strides in our movement," he continued, but I couldn't help but pause his sentence in my mind.
I raised my hand slowly and he stopped, allowing me to speak. "Wh-what do you mean by... member of the family?"
He smiled slowly. "I will be naming you today as a member of our royal family. Lasory has closely observed you as a person, and has given me every bit the confidence that you will place only good merit upon this family name."
That completely stunned me and quite frankly I don't think even set in properly, because I literally had my jaw open and eyes wide.
"Given that you have thus far been and here on will be used politically, it's only fair that you be treated with the respect and status of royalty that you will be seen as. So both to the public and to this family, you are one of us and I am prepared to grant you every last bit the same voice of power as my other children."
He paused, then thought for a moment.
"Well, if that's fair to you. If perhaps a more suitable arrangement or reward seems more properly in order, don't hesitate to speak of such."
In my shock and fear, and with my stomach practically bubbling, I managed to squeak out, "Can I have a favor?"
"Please do," he gestured.
"I... would like to share the same job as Lasory. I don't want... to just laze around and do nothing."
I gulped as he thought, but he then shrugged and said, "I don't see it being an issue. Consider it done."
My nerves were replaced with excitement as that conversation set in and he brought me back to the meeting hall to formally announce that I was going to be made a member of the family. Kino congratulated me and called me his sister, but I think for him at least that was going to be only the one time, since we have a complicated and... personal... relationship.
Throughout the carriage ride back, I could only think about all the things I could do as a member of royalty, like have fancy clothes made for me and host fun parties and get to do all the things Kino and Myu do.
When we got back, had our celebratory dinner, and then Myu and I had our subsequent nightly runaway to a random point of the mansion, I was quickly grounded by a very angry Ayami who thoroughly scolded the both of us, and I realized that mostly everything would stay the same.
I stopped by the rai tree and grabbed one of the last of the rai nuts it would grow for the year, but still couldn't open it, much to my thorough frustration.
I lay in my attic room and thought about all the things that have happened in my time here with Myu Sakari, Lasory Sakari Kyur and Sehri Ayami, and how I now am also a Sakari. Lydia Sakari. I thought that sounded good, personally.
My good old ghost friend showed up, a bright light emanating from her chest as she looked at me with a teary eyed, bright, thoroughly satisfied and happy face, and said, "You're ready."
She placed her hand over my confused face, and I blacked out as a million things flashed before my eyes.
A handsome face with fluffy green-grey hair... Hystial. The kingdom of Teriu... being its princess... I was its princess. Wait, whose memories are these? Whose life is this?
I knew exactly what was happening: Lydia was giving me her memories, but it was overwhelming and puzzling for me. I wasn't just looking at someone else's life and memories... they were mine. It was like I'd lived two lives at the same time, memories from both of them being equally possessed by me, and the culmination of all of them fought and collided and merged with one another, the personalities they each created mutually fusing to create a whole new person.
My time on Earth, my time here as a princess and later as a slave... I had lived through it all.
"Do better this time around. For both of us..." her voice echoed in my mind.
My mind. The mind of... of me. Of Lydia Sakari.
I... am Lydia Sakari.