"Of course, she's engaged, I mean did you see her? She's gorgeous."
Jean slurs his words, courtesy of the eight consecutive glasses of whiskey he's just had. He decided to visit the bar after the art show, and Marco decided to follow him as well. Gut feeling, if you will. It seems like he made the right decision, as he found his best friend was drinking his sorrows away, everyone else looking at him in pity.
"I'm sorry, Jean," Marco says solemnly, patting Jean's back as he laid his head on the bar counter. He's never seen him so down, not to mention so drunk, before. He struggles to find the words to comfort him, "Hey, you'll find your person... eventually."
That's definitely not what Jean wanted to hear. He thought you were his person. He was sure of it, why else would you two have such a fateful encounter?
He sat in silence, his mind clouded with the image of you. He couldn't believe it, he finally saw you again. You were somehow even more perfect than he remembered, taking his breath away once again.
What a cruel gift from destiny, bringing you here to a hopeful Jean, just to show you've already been claimed by another.
He began to think about the man you were with. You smiling at his proposal, kissing and hugging your loving fiancé, among other things. His heart hurt at the thought of it. He grew angry as well, not at you, but at himself for not trying hard enough to seek you, to find you sooner.
"C'mon, let's get you home. We have to go pick up our pieces from the gallery tomorrow."
"Mmm," he groans, not getting up. Marco rolls his eyes, "I wonder what Y/n thinks about drunks who fall asleep in bars..."
"..."
Jean slowly stood up, Marco carrying him by the arm around his shoulder. They walked out of the bar, the night breeze cooling them down.
As he was being dragged by Marco, his head slowly turned to the side, his half-lidded eyes stopping upon a figure. One familiar figure.
"Y-Y/n?" he muttered, his eyes slowly blinking. Marco turns to where Jean was gazing, a confused look striking his face.
"What? I don't see anyone," he says. Jean looks once again, but the figure not being there anymore.
"W-what? I swear I just-"
"Yeah, we really need to get you home, you're hallucinating," Marco says with concern. Jean was dumbfounded, swearing he just saw you sitting on the curb. He gets into Marco's truck, looking up at the night sky, reflecting on tonight.
Although the thought of you brought him sadness, it also brought excitement. The excitement that he'll see you once again, very soon.
The next morning, you woke up early to meet up with Mikasa and the rest of her bridesmaids. You were to meet them at Levi's tea shop, where Mikasa would be discussing the order of things for the wedding.
As you got ready, you were interrupted by a phone call; your mind initially going to Reiner. Of course, you were wrong. You frown as you saw your father's name appear.
You sighed before answering, "Morning, Dad."
"Good Morning Y/n," he says, "How are you adjusting? Erwin had told me you rented a place from him. Surprised I didn't hear it from you."
You rolled your eyes at his passive aggressiveness, "Yeah, sorry, I've just been busy. Meeting up with old friends, you know."
Your father stays silent for a bit, "Is that so? Hm, how lovely. Well, just wanted to see how you were doing real quick. I have a meeting to attend."
"Okay! Bye-"
"Oh, Y/n, one more thing," he interrupts you, "Try checking in on your fiancé while you're here, especially before a night out on the town."
You stayed silent, wondering how he found out about your whereabouts. It made you irritated, the way he still used the same tactics from when you were last here. Nine years ago, when you were just a teenager.
"Of course. Bye, dad," you state, not bothering to even rebuttal his unnecessary comment. Not even one week in, and his old habits have begun once again.
out of sight, out of mind, you thought.
His words kept creeping up in your mind as you put on your shoes, about to head out of your apartment.
"Try checking in on your fiancé while you're here..."
Hm. So much for out of mind.
As you walked through the busy streets of Rose district, you decide to dial your fiancé's number, the phone ringing a few times. You bit your lip nervously, your cherry-colored nails tapping the back of your phone in anticipation of him hopefully answering.
"...Hello?"
Your eyes widen as you hear the familiarity of his deep voice, stunned he actually picked up, "Reiner, Hi. It's Y/n."
"I know, I have your number, dear."
dear?
Your heart beats a bit faster as you heard him call you that; he hasn't called you any names in a while. Maybe he has actually started to realize what he was missing out on.
You chuckled, "Right, well um, how are you? Is everything okay back home? How's work?"
A dreadful silence followed along with some muffled voices in the background, Reiner speaking once again, "Sorry, I'm at work, say that again?"
You felt yourself become down again, the exciting feeling of Reiner acknowledging you fading away, "How are you, dear?"
"I'm good, everything's normal-"
"Dr. Braun, Dr. Hoover is requesting your assistance in OR 5."
"Ah, I've got to go, Y/n."
You frown, Levi's tea shop finally in sight, "W-wait! When can we call again? I've missed-"
"I'm not sure. I'm busy," you hear him sigh once again, "look, I really need to go."
You let out a deep sigh as you stop in front of the stained glass doors of the cafe, "Right. Well, bye, I love you."
"You too, Take care."
The call ends, leaving you with no certainty nor any warm feeling in your body, like one, should feel when speaking to the person they were going to marry. You painfully shrugged it off, not letting it put a damper on your plans with Mikasa and the girls.
You walk into the shop, heading straight towards the patio where you saw Mikasa and the others through the window. You walked outside, your presence catching the eyes of Hitch, who immediately waves at you.
"You made it!" she says, her voice slightly raspy but very enthusiastic. Mikasa, Annie, and Sasha turn as well, them all smiling as you sit down.
"Sorry I'm late, I hope I didn't miss too much," you grin as you adjusted yourself. Mikasa shakes her head, "No, we were just about to get started. I ordered you your usual, hope it's still a favorite."
"Of course it is! Anything from Levi's," you exclaim, "Can't believe you remember a small detail like that, Mika."
"I mean, you were here every single day," Sasha chimes in, "I remember one time Jean even planned your surprise birthday party here. Took him all night because he wanted it perfect, he even passed out in math class."
You, Mikasa, and Sasha laughed, suddenly remembering that hidden memory. Hitch looks at you all, "Sounds like Jean, always going beyond for his friends."
"Oh they weren't just friends, they were practically in lo-" Sasha blurts out, suddenly stopping as she realized this was an awkward thing to say in front of you and Hitch.
Hitch furrows her brows, "You dated Jean?" she says, her tone a bit rash. Your eyes avert to the table as you give her a small smile, "Yeah, " you replied hesitantly, "But it wasn't anything serious, just a little high school romance, that's all."
You lied through your teeth, but you didn't feel the need to go into the whole details of your past relationship for many reasons, one being you were engaged. The other being, well, Hitch was a little too invested for your liking.
"Huh," she nods slowly, "I had no idea! We usually tell each other everything too..." her voice trails off.
You felt a small hint of sadness enter your body when Hitch said Jean never mentioned you. It wasn't, or rather it shouldn't, have been a big deal, but you couldn't help but feel disappointment. You ponder for a second when one particular question arose in your mind.
You raise your brow slightly, "Oh, are you two together?"
"What!? No," Hitch laughs, her cheeks becoming slightly pink. Her response might have made you think she was against the idea, but her eyes gleamed upon you asking, proving all the otherwise.
"Why would you think that?" she asks curiously. You take a sip of your tea that was just given to you and shrug your shoulders, "Just asking, since you said you two told each other everything."
She giggles as she swiftly tucks a strand of her blonde hair behind her ear, "We're just good friends. My best friend, really."
You blink slowly as you look back down, "Oh," you let out softly. Mikasa gives you a sympathetic look, "Well! Let's get started, shall we?"
You immediately change your expression, smiling big as you nod in agreement, "Yes please!"
please.
"Okay," Mikasa exhales, opening up a binder full of papers, "So the bride and groom party are as follows; Sasha as the maid of honor and Armin as best man, Hitch and Marco, Annie and Connie, Y/n and Jean."
Your eyes widen immediately when you heard your name being mentioned with Jean. Mikasa knew you would be shocked out of your mind, since she purposefully put you two together, so she tried her best to not look your way. Hitch's eyes dart right to your face and back to Mikasa, "Those are the final pairings?"
Mikasa nods her head, "Yup! We took a lot of things into consideration, like, um, height!"
"Well if that was the case, shouldn't Annie be with Je-" Sasha began with her mouth full of an English muffin.
"Moving on!"
The rest of it went pretty smoothly; it would be an outdoor wedding on the hill near Eren's house, with the colors being wine red, cream white, and sage green. Sasha's boyfriend will be in charge of catering, and Hitch would be in charge of the dresses since she is a fashion designer. You would all wear silk green dresses, and in a unanimous vote, Sasha will throw the "bachelorette" party. You weren't sure how bachelorette it would be, with Mikasa being pregnant, but nevertheless, you were all committed to helping her with her needs as bridesmaids.
"Okay, well I should be heading out. See you all on Friday?" Hitch asks excitedly, them all nodding in agreement.
"Duh!" Sasha chuckles as she grabs her purse, Annie and Mikasa doing the same. You slowly stood up, awkwardly smiling as you were confused as to what would be happening tomorrow night.
"Oh! I totally forgot," Hitch blurts out, her slightly cold hands grabbing yours, "My birthday party is going to be here on Friday! You should try to make it, it'll be super fun!"
"She's having a party for her birthday next week, you should try to come."
"I wouldn't miss it," you reply as you stare into her big green eyes that awaited your response. Hitch gives you a warm smile, "Alright, I'm heading over to Marco's, bye girls!"
"Bye!" you all say, Annie and Sasha, following after. As the last girl left the patio, you turn to Mikasa, "Really? Jean? I would've preferred Connie."
Mikasa sighs as she lifts herself up from her chair, you helping her by offering your arm. She rubs her belly, "What? You two would make for a good pairing, don't you think?"
You give her a look, leaving a tip on the table as you both walk out the patio, "So, Hitch," you began, "She's pretty fond of Jean, huh?"
"Jealous?" Mikasa smirks, "Kidding. They've been best friends since college. They've been inseparable since. Well, until Jean went to France to revisit his family and pursue his art. She knew it was the best choice for him, but she still felt devastated."
You understood that feeling, the one Hitch might have felt when Jean left. The only person that could've understood better than you, would be Jean himself.
You both walked out of the cafe, the day still clear and bright. You turn to face Mikasa, "Well, I'll see you on Friday. What should I get her? I don't know her that well but I feel bad coming empty-handed."
Mikasa chuckles, "Just get her a wine, I'm sure she'll appreciate anything you bring" she glances towards the busy street, "Any other plans for today?"
"Well," you began, "I have a place I've been meaning to visit."
Mikasa turns her head to the side, small strands of her black hair falling on her face, "Oh? I have some time before my appointment, want me to accompany you?"
"Oh no it's okay Mika, really," you shake your head reassuringly, "Plus, it's somewhere I'd rather visit alone."
Mikasa nods understandingly, you giving her a hug before going your separate ways. You began to walk, your mind trying to circulate a certain path you would take every single day.
It was quite a far walk from the city, you even surprised yourself at how well you still remembered the trail. You slowly entered, a wave of nostalgia and serenity welcoming you, along with the singing birds and rustling leaves from the trees. You trailed your hand across every tree you walked passed, a small smile creeping up on your face.
You felt your heart skip a beat when you reached the sound of the running ripples of water, softly clashing against the rocks embedded into the ground. You began to walk faster, entering a small maze of bushes, your arms pushing them away in order for you to go through.
There it was, the creek.
Pushing back on the last branch, and it was right in front of you. Breathtaking as you remembered it to be, every single time you visited. Your eyes gleamed, taking it all in, looking from the stream that went on for miles, back to the base, where you saw someone.
Someone painting. Your eyes immediately made out who it was.
Your eyes couldn't stop staring at Jean for some reason. They trailed from his face that was so intently focused on the canvas, his shirtless body that was practically glowing in the sun. He grasped the paintbrush delicately as he painted, moving his hair whenever it blocked his view. You felt wrong eyeing him like this, without his knowledge of you here. You kept telling yourself to look away before he noticed.
As he stopped painting to wipe his brush, his eyes looked up right at you, causing your heart to drop and your body to jerk back into the bush, breaking a branch in the process.
Oh my god, you thought, extreme embarrassment entering your body. Your cheeks felt hot, he certainly saw you. You froze, not knowing if you should run away, or just come out to face him.
Jean stops, putting his brush down and wiping his jeans as he looks over to the bush. He furrows his brows, "Who's there?"
Your eyes widen as you hear his voice, confirming he saw you. You take a deep sigh as you walk out, meeting his gaze.
"Y/n," he softly says. He wasn't surprised at the fact you were here — you two were the only ones who knew of this place. He was surprised you remembered. You give him a small wave as you walk all the way out, a long distance between the two of you.
"Hi," you awkwardly said, "I- I didn't want to bother you."
"You couldn't possibly do that," he says immediately after, looking away from your eyes. You stay silent for a bit, taken aback by his response.
"Another landscape, I'm guessing?" you ask curiously. Jean smiles as he nods, making you instinctually smile back.
"I'm surprised you still come here," you continued as you looked to the creek in front, "It's as beautiful as I remember."
Jean continues to stare at you, "I don't think I could ever forget."
You kneel down to feel the water, making your fingertips cold as you lift them up and come in contact with the now cold wind, "It's ironic, really."
"What is?"
"How everything has changed," you replied with a solemn tone, "Yet finding it refreshing, coming back to something that's the same as I left it."
The longing distance between the two of you felt as if it was closing in, yet not one of you moved from your place. It was slow, but it was sure. You looked up to meet Jean's gaze, who's never left your face. His light brown eyes made your heart race with each second it lasted. The feeling was foreign and familiar, all at once.
"Can I see?" you blurted out, breaking the silence. Jean breaks out of his trance, "Y-yeah."
You walk up to where he had his easel, looking at the unfinished canvas in awe. Your lips parted as you looked at it, your hands desperately wanting to feel it, "It's... amazing."
You were so impressed with how his art has grown through all this time, right along with him. Just when you thought he couldn't get better, he did just that.
"Not quite done with it, need that corner right there," Jean replies as he points to the area you were previously at. You nod, "I should leave you to it then."
"No!" he says abruptly, "I mean, no, you don't have to do that. This place means to you as much as it means to me. Plus, it's been ages since you were last here, I'm sure you missed it."
He was right. The last time you were here, was also the last time you saw him. You did miss it, the feeling became more apparent as you stood in front of him.
"Are you sure?" you ask with a small frown, "I don't want to ruin the view."
Jean chuckles, going back to painting, "As I said earlier, you couldn't possibly do that."
There it was again. The feeling in your chest. The one that made you feel all warm, your heart beating slightly faster. You decided to stay, leaving next to the creek with your feet inside the water. You took out the book that was in your purse, beginning to read for a while. Your eyes occasionally glanced towards Jean, who was still painting.
His eyes look up at you, making you flustered as you looked back down at your book. A small smile crept up on his face, and slowly appeared on yours as well.
"What ya reading?" Jean asks, his eyes still fixated on the canvas, painted with hues of greens, blues, and hints of yellow. You turn to look at him, closing the book with your thumb inside the page you left off on, "Poetry."
Jean hums at your response, "Read me one."
You raise your brows slightly, not sure what to say. He looks at your puzzled face, "You know, for old time's sake."
"Okay..." you began, opening the book back to where you left off. You gulped before you spoke out loud, "Do you think the mind answers to the heart? The way it keeps conjuring up what is no longer there," you began, your brows furrowed as your eyes trailed along with each sentence, "I don't know why I keep swinging like a pendulum between the two when I know the mirage will never be enough. But the heart does not have eyes and the mind cannot resist when it asks, tell me just one more time."
There it was. That little hint of passion and indulgence that came out whenever you read something out loud. Jean loved the way you spoke when you did so, it was different than when you would speak casually, your tone changing to the rhythm of the literature. Your voice was so serene to him, as smooth as the paint he stroked onto his canvases — creating a beautiful picture.
You both said nothing as you continued to look down, the words leaving such an imprint on you.
"The name?" Jean asks, "Of the book?"
You turn to look at the maroon cover, "Love and Misadventure."
"Thought romance was corny to you," he smirks. You chuckle at his memory, "Yeah, well nowadays I try to find it anywhere."
You immediately regret saying that, as it came out extremely awkward. Though it was the truth, there are things better left unsaid and just as thoughts. You cursed yourself for not realizing that sooner.
"Um, I should get going," you get up from the grass, patting your clothes, "My fiancé is probably waiting for me to call," you chuckled, fully knowing that was not the case. Jean stays silent as he remembered your fiancé, trying his hardest to not let it show on his face.
"See you at Hitch's party?" he asks with hopefulness in his eyes. You nod, "Yes, see you then. Good luck with your painting," you nod towards the easel, "I'm sure it'll be another masterpiece."
You leave him with those words and a bright smile, one which made Jean's heart flutter as fast as the butterflies near the flowers amongst the grass. His eyes couldn't help but follow you out until you were no longer in sight, and him letting out a deep sigh.
Some time has passed since you left, and Jean had finally finished the missing piece to his painting. He's had trouble finding the motivation to finish it, but that left today coincidentally. He lifts it off the easel, that little blank corner now being painted with a figure of a beautiful faceless woman, reading a book along the creek.
I should get going too, he thought. He needed to go pick up his painting from the gallery. Last night was a success for Jean; many applauded his work. He couldn't take the credit for it all though, after all, the painting was of you.
He walked towards the art gallery after leaving his painting at home, the occasional puffs of smoke from his cigarette blowing in the air. As he walked closer to his destination, the memory of your engagement ring blinding him flashed in his mind, as if it was meant to be a painful revelation.
As he entered the gallery, he noticed quite a few people picked up their pieces, including Marco. Some other artists were talking to potential buyers and collectors, Jean feeling excited for them as he saw their hopeful faces. It was an honor to have someone willing to buy your pieces of art, it showed that the artist was not the only one who deemed them to be valuable.
He's had some of his artwork bought as well, especially during his time in France. His artwork consisted of everything, from landscapes to human beings, and anything in between. The French were fond of his work, he hoped Eldians were, too.
Jean's thoughts were immediately interrupted as he came towards his painting that was still hung on the wall, and a man in front analyzing it.
"Exquisite work, Mr. Kirstein," he says as he squints at the painting. His blue eyes meet Jean's, who was filled with surprise at his presence.
"You're," he began, dumbfounded enough to not even finish his sentence. The man grins as he puts his hand out for Jean to shake, "William Tybur."
Jean was in complete awe, staring at the man in front of him. William Tybur, the head of the Tybur family, is one of the wealthiest families in the world. He just so happens to be a big art connoisseur, planning to open an art museum in Eldia later this year, residing in the district of Sina. William Tybur was a name that brought honor and respect where ever it was mentioned, and Jean felt just that when in his presence of him at this moment.
Jean immediately shakes his hand, maybe a little too hard, but he couldn't really notice under the excitement that harbored him, "It's an honor, sir."
Willy nods, "I must say, I am in awe of this painting..." he hums, squinting to see the small details, "Tell me, Mr. Kirstein, is this person special to you?"
"Yes, she is," Jean says softly.
Willy hums once again, still analyzing the painting with his hand lightly pressed on his chin, "I'll take it. How much?"
Jean was taken aback by the abrupt offer, "I-, you... want to buy this?"
"It feels like a classic, gives a sense of romanticism," Willy says as he rubs his chin, "I don't see much of this these days. How much do you want for it, Mr. Kirstein?"
Jean stumbles to find a response because he wasn't sure of what it was going to be. He was extremely excited about the grand offer of one of his pieces being bought, especially it being Willy Tybur. But, as he looked back at the painting, something within himself inclined him not to do so.
"I'm sorry... this one isn't for sale," he stares at the canvas, down to the little gold plaque right under it. As much as he'd love for Mr. Tybur to own one of his works, this painting turned out to have some sort of invisible string attached to it, him being on the other end of it with no intention of letting go.
"Oh," Willy mutters rather monotonously, raising his brows at the unexpected response, "I understand."
Jean nods, his lips slightly frowning as he begins to take off the painting from the cream wall. Willy stays still, watching him take it down gently and carefully, his hands firm on the frame at all times. As he begins to walk away from Willy and his offer of a lifetime, he finds himself surprisingly okay, because even when presented with the choice; he always found himself choosing you.
"Wait, Mr. Kirstein," Willy calls out to him, making Jean turn around. He looks at the tall blonde, his face slightly confused, "Yes?"
"I usually don't do this... but I don't think I'll find another artist here that has piqued my interest quite like," Willy begins, walking towards him once again, "So I'll present you with another offer; as you might now, I am planning on opening an art museum next year here in your hometown, I'd like for one of your works to be displayed."
"Seriously?" Jean repeats, in complete shock. Willy chuckles at his expression, "Yes, I am very much serious. I want something new, so have a portfolio of paintings for me to choose from..." he says, "Oh, one more thing."
"Anything sir," Jean responds immediately, ready to accept whatever Willy might propose.
"All paintings must be of your muse."
Willy points to the painting Jean held with such care, making him slowly look down at it as well. His head looks back up to Willy, "Of... my muse?"
"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder," Willy begins, turning the painting Jean held so tightly around, "Yours show endearment to this painted woman, I don't think anything else will display that."
"You have until the end of summer, I look forward to hearing from you, Mr. Kirsten," Willy sighs, handing Jean a small white card with a phone number printed in small text, "Hopefully with some impeccable work."
Willy leaves Jean with his words lingering in his mind as he stood still, not being able to move. Did that really just occur? To be offered not one, but two offers of a lifetime — that simply just doesn't happen to artists like Jean, whose the only thing they had going for them was this deep, burning passion within themselves.
But it did.
He wasn't sure if he'd let himself become ignited just yet, as for that to occur it needed a spark.
A spark that just so happened to be you.
The night of Hitch's 23rd birthday party arrived much sooner than you expected, mainly due to the fact that you were anticipating it the most. It was a nice summer night, not too cold, not too hot. Perfect weather to meet up with friends.
And people in between.
You decided to wear a nice floral dress, the ideal attire for the climate here in Eldia. It swayed as you walked through the streets, the post lights shining on people sitting down at the tables outside of restaurants. You stare up at the fireflies that surrounded the post, your eyes trailing up at the clear night sky. You faced everything but the reality of right now; trying desperately to not think about the excitement you had felt in your body — the one that only came when thinking about someone, in particular, that would be in attendance tonight.
Levi's shop was closed for the night, reserved for only Hitch's guests, along with some workers. You grasped onto the vertical sage green gift bag as you got closer to the shop, a nice white wine inside the bag, along with a very blunt, to-the-point birthday card. You figured she wouldn't mind such a basic gift, since you both just happened to meet each other. With your being here, that was sure to change.
You enter the empty shop, some workers walking here and there. One greeted you as you handed them your gift, placing it on the table along with the other ones. You walked all the way to the back, where you saw Hitch's guests, both familiar and unfamiliar, on the patio of the shop through the tall glass windows. Small fairy lights surrounded the patio through the trees, along with the stars illuminating the outside. It was a beautiful arrangement, it guaranteed a great night.
You opened the back door, walking towards the friendly strangers. Everyone wore the widest smiles and shared the most genuine laughs, making you feel out of place. You saw your friends amongst them as well, their expressions no different. It felt as if you would burst their bubble if you decided to walk towards them and into their conversations, so you decided to walk around, trying to find where to fit in.
You then reach the bar stationed near the end of the patio, Hange dancing to the rhythm of the music as they pour alcohol into glasses. A wave of relief hit you, making you walk even faster towards them.
"Didn't know you were a part-time bartender," you joke, sitting down in front of them. You catch Hange by surprise, their immediately lighting up upon seeing you.
"You made it!" they exclaim, "You look gorgeous my dear, what can I get you to start off the night?"
"I shouldn't," you softly laugh, looking down at your nails as you play with them. Hange furrows their brows, "I am very against peer pressuring, but it looks like you need one... no offense."
Your mouth opens slightly, in shock at Hange's assumption, despite it being very, very true.
"Can you make a martini?"
Hange winks, "Coming right up."
"Ugh, can't wait to drink one of those again."
You turn around as you hear Mikasa's voice, smiling as you see her in a nice wine-red dress, fringes of her bangs slightly covering her forehead as she waves at you. She walks towards the empty seat right next to you, sighing in relief at being able to rest her feet.
"This first sip is for you then," you reply as Hange slides the martini glass towards you, placing an olive for the finishing touch, "Cheers."
Mikasa holds an imaginary glass up, making you laugh as you take your first sip, "The place looks amazing, I'm guessing this was all you?"
"You would be correct," she replies, "Decorating classrooms make for good practice."
"Martini? Hange, hand this girl a beer," Hitch shouts out abruptly, making both you and Mikasa jump. She wore a sparkly silver dress, paired with those cheesy pink sashes that say "birthday girl".
"Happy Birthday, Hitch," you respond, Hitch immediately going in for a hug. You could tell she was tipsy, the scent of alcohol slightly mixed in with her perfume. Her arms embrace you tightly, rocking you side to side, "Aw thank you! So glad you were able to make it!"
"Of course," you smile, her finally letting go. Eren and Armin, along with Annie, all walk towards you all, ordering their drinks as well.
"Birthday girl has to take twenty five shots, I don't make the rules," Connie sarcastically sighs as he holds a platter full of tequila shots for everyone. Hitch eyes widen, "Oh god."
"You heard him, Hitch," Jean says as he walks towards you all, Marco by his side. Your eyes immediately lock with his, making your cheeks feel hot. He wore a cream linen shirt, first four unbuttoned and the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. Jean felt his heart beat faster as you continued to stare at him, despite keeping his calm demeanor. His gives you a small smirk before turning to Hitch, making you turn to her as well. He hands her a shot glass, "Well, what are you waiting for birthday girl?"
Hitch laughs, "Alright, but you all gotta take one with me! Except for Mikasa, of course."
"Y/n can take two, on behalf of me," she says, nudging your arm. You chuckled, "Guess I have no choice."
Connie cheers as he hands you two, "1942, good luck."
"Wait- I'd like to say a few words," Jean announces as raises his shot glass, "Hitch, you are one of the most kind, loving, and caring soul I have ever met. I hope this year is good to you, you deserve the world and more. To my bestest friend, we love you so much."
Everyone lets out small awes as Hitch side hugs Jean, him kissing the top of her head. Your face twitches as you smile, holding your two shot glasses in one hand.
"Happy Birthday Hitch on three!" Jean shouts, wrapping his arm around her shoulder. Everyone gathers around her, beginning to count.
"One, two, three!"
"Happy Birthday Hitch!"
You take the first shot, immediately following with the other. The tequila was strong, but went down smoother than water. Everyone cheers and claps for Hitch as she blows air kisses to you all.
"You took those like a champ Y/n," Sasha says in awe. Connie laughs, "You're a natural!"
You laugh in embarrassment, "Marley may be full of nerds, but they threw some pretty wild parties," you began, making everyone laugh, "College Y/n had a blast."
"Wish we could've seen her," Jean replies, his tone being more serious than causal. The group turns to him, then back to you, waiting for your response. You could feel tension becoming thicker as all eyes were on you.
You struggle to respond, your mouth slightly agape after hearing the most unexpected words.
"Well! Anyone want a beer!?" Hange announces, Connie and Eren accepting their offer. Hitch, Marco, and Jean all leave to the middle of the patio, dancing to her favorite music.
You stared at them, how they danced so carelessly, laughed so loudly, smiled so honestly. Despite just being here for a few, you immediately noticed how much they cared for her. Especially Jean.
Though you were uncertain where the unwanted, profound feeling derived from, you couldn't help but think;
That should've been you.
It wasn't jealousy, nor envy towards Hitch, but rather a soft yearning from nostalgia. It should've been you in the middle of that patio dancing with them, feeling like you belonged, and not feeling like you were on the outside, looking in.
Mikasa stares at you, her face sympathetic as she notices where your eyes have landed. To anyone else, you just looked like a normal girl slightly tipsy from the back to back alcohol, staring off into the crowd. Mikasa wasn't just anyone though, at times she knew you better than you knew yourself. She places her soft hand on your shoulder, "You okay?"
You shake your head reassuringly, "Yeah! Why wouldn't I be?" you laugh, smiling widely. Mikasa's face stays the same, making you shift in your seat, so much you decided to stand up abruptly, "I'm... going to go get some fresh air,"
"We're outside, Y/n."
"Away from the crowd," you respond back, making your way back into the shop and all the way outside to the front. You crossed your arms, taking a deep breath. Though it was louder on this side due to the cars and the nearby restaurants, it felt comforting in a way.
Were you to feel like this forever? This uncomfortable, saddening feeling in your chest everytime you looked at your friends. Were you to always feel out of place, in where it was supposed to be your home?
You didn't know what went faster; the cars racing down the streets, your the overbearing thoughts racing in your mind.
"Leaving so early?"
Somehow Jean's three words were able to stop your mind completely, his voice bringing you back to your reality.
You turn away from the street in front of you, finding his eyes waiting for your answer and his hands tucked into his pockets as he walks towards you. The height difference was significant, your eyes naturally trailing up to see his face, "Just needed to get out of there for a bit."
"You too, huh," Jean sighs, standing right next you you now. You both turn to look back at buildings and the streets, everything but each other.
"You too?" you repeated, "It looked like you were enjoying yourself."
"Yeah, hard not to when you're around Hitch," he smiles, your heart suddenly feeling heavy.
Why am I feeling this way?, you thought. It's normal for them to be so close, right? After all, he did say she was his bestest friend.
"So why are you out here?" You ask abruptly, curious to hear his response.
"To tell you the truth, there's something on my mind," Jean says truthfully as stares up at the stars, "Something Hitch and Marco can't really help me with."
You look up to see his face, how serious he was as he continued, "I met Willy Tybur today."
"Oh my god," you gasp, "That's huge, Jean! That's always been your-"
"My dream, I know," he interrupts softly, "He loved the painting, I felt like the best artist in the world."
Your eyes softened as you see his light up as he spoke, "As an artist, we see the world in a different light... and when other's see it the same way, it makes us feel accomplished."
"He wants a painting by me for his museum, but I'm not sure if I can accept."
You held your hand up to your mouth in disbelief, "Why not?" you raised your voice slightly, "This is your dream! What else do you possibly need in order to accept?"
He stays quiet for a moment, his face finally turning down to face yours, his jaw clenching. The air was so fresh, yet you felt yourself heat up as you waited for his response with such anticipation.
"You."
"...Me?"
"I need you," he mutters just loud enough for you to hear, "I need my art to be at my best, and my best is whenever I find myself painting you, Y/n," Jean confesses, making your heart race once again but in weird, exhilarating way, "I won't accept anything less, so I'm asking..."
He pauses, placing his arms on your shoulders, making you slightly shiver as his face was now inches away from yours. You could feel the desperation in his voice, it was almost visible with lack of space between you two. You couldn't help but be wide-eyed as you process what he was saying, and ultimately what you knew he was about to ask right now;
"Be my muse, Y/n."
-
let the games begin
[the picture above is what i had in mind for jean's painting of y/n near the creek]
thank you for reading <3