"You have a place in my heart no one else ever could have."
- F. Scott Fitzgerald
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(TW)
THE GUN'S RECOIL NEVER HAPPENS. I expect it. I firm my feet on the floor not to be thrown back, but the impact doesn't come because there was never a bullet to begin with.
I gasp, my hands shaking. Damien has his eyes on me the entire time, cursing when he realizes this was all a test and I failed.
Because I look at the boy, I recklessly pointed the gun, and it isn't him.
Jace has a cruel smile written on his lips with his gaze fixated on me and he steps closer, the barrel touching his forehead like it's nothing. I betrayed him and he was expecting that.
"Why?" I'm trembling, the tears streaming my cheeks now being completely out of fear and Damien tries to set himself free when his enemy pushes the gun down and takes it away from my hand, grasping my hair and making me yelp.
"You thought I wouldn't find out, Adelina? You thought I wouldn't know you and Scarlett have been working together to take me down?" He rasps against my ear and his gaze on me burns, I can only hear Damien cursing beside us. If I thought Jace was intimidating, now he's horrifying.
I have no idea what he is talking about.
"I know nothing, Jace, I swe-" The words die on my mouth when he turns us around to the door, my scalp burning with his touch, and I see Scarlett coming from it, being taken by her long locks through the floor by a big guy.
I feel the bile rise up from my throat when he lets her go harshly, coughs erupting from her throat painting the floor dark red, and Jace points to her.
More tears fall.
"Show them her face, Darren."
His guy grasps her hair again now angling it so her neck is exposed and her face is seen in the light. I close my eyes before she can stare at me, shaking my head but it's useless, Jace's voice soon comes in my ear.
"Look or I will force you." The minute I open my eyes as demanded and see what they did to her, I feel my insides twist. I need to run to an iron barrel left behind to empty my stomach. Jace purposely softens up the grip around me.
From one side of her face to the other, passing from her right cheek through her nose and forehead, a huge cut takes place, and dry blood sticks to it like someone burned the skin so it wouldn't even give the skin a chance to recover, undo the ugly marks.
The bad boy shouts my name but I'm too focused on stopping the yearning.
Fuck.
I rest my head in the barrel and all I can take is a deep breath before Jace walks in my direction, gun in hand, and takes me by my hair.
I yelp again and Damien is frantic.
"Don't you fucking dare to touch her, Jace!" Damien's groans echo through the walls and he's even more desperate he can't see us. We are in his back and Jace takes advantage of that.
"If that's what happens when family betrays me, what do you think will happen with my enemy's bitch?" He tightens the grip, being so agonizing that I blink away the tears and I feel my heart stop.
To the brim of pain, he lets me go and I take a deep breath. I regret so much shaking his hand.
I don't have time to recover when he takes me back by my hair just like that guy did to Scarlett, each step being another pull, another yelp. The floor is cold against my skin, the concrete harsh bruising it.
He throws me on the floor in front of Damien, a few meters away from his cousin.
I shriek with the burn on my scalp.
The bad boy is cursing deliriously, trying to untie the knots in multiple ways and Jace takes it even further. I feel his hands around my face, lifting it so I can see him and the slap that succeeds is enough to take my breath away. His palm against my cheek mixes with my tears.
I can feel the pain shooting through my face.
"I will fucking kill you." It's all I can hear from the bad boy as I look down, trying to take a deep breath not to pass out. I cry at how dumb I was.
This was his plan all along, he never wanted to take Damien's gang with the pact. He is already gaining territories, what he needs is his enemy dead.
"I'm so sorry, Adelina." Between all the screams, Jace getting closer to the bad boy to spit something on his face, I hear Scarlett faintly and look at her with pity in my eyes. Fuck.
"You have nothing to be sorry for. I did all of this." I shake my head, feeling so stupid that I want to die. I brought we all to this moment. My tears will never stop.
"He thought we were plotting something against him but I did it all by myself. I told them where we would be, Kayla and Cha-" I close my eyes when a loud gun sound reverberates throughout the entire construction, my heart stopping for a moment to think it could be towards Damien but when I open them again to have my answer, I scream.
Jace shot his own cousin in front of me.
I sit up, distancing myself from her as fast as I can while I continue to scream. I'm horrified.
Scarlett now lies on the cold floor, her life ended by the person she thought would always kill her. He really did.
I can't breathe.
"Adelina, look at me." Damien signs for me to inhale and exhale, using the little time window that we have as Jace talks to his guys and I try to do as he says, my gaze darting to the girl who I misunderstood all this time. "Look at me, not her."
I find his hazel eyes in the chaos, them being enough to escape reality and focus again on breathing. Having a panic attack would serve nothing and he helped with that, just like the old times. I can only mouth 'thank you' before Jace towers over me.
"Do you want another surprise, sweetheart?" There's nowhere I can go and I can only plead as he crouches at my eye level, his face with remnants of blood.
"There's someone to see you." I freeze with his sentence, praying to God that it isn't Sammy and I start crying even harder with the thought of being him.
The Cobra's leader opens a smile before signing for me to look at the disastrous door, Damien following it all along and I lose my breath when I see her.
"Bella?" I widen my eyes, my voice dying in my throat as she walks in my direction in all her beauty, a black jumpsuit hugging her body and her dark blonde hair in a french braid.
What the fuck?
"You killed our friend, Lina. You need to pay." It's all she says as she comes closer, Jace making me stand up and holding both my arms.
My heartbeat is frantic and I understand nothing, her betrayal somehow being something I always anticipated.
"I blame myself for Eric, every damn second, but you weren't there for him either, Bella." I don't know how I find the strength to mumble the words while I'm in pain but I do and her eyes turn feral.
She slaps me. The aching comes throbbing all over again now on the other cheek and I don't have a reaction. The tears are a relief, making a path through my red skin.
Bella smiles at me before taking a needle out of her pocket and that's when I start to struggle against Jace's grip. I cry, begging my best friend not to do this but she's a stranger now.
The bad boy screams my name but all I feel is a sharp pain before everything goes black.
I feel dazed as I try to open my eyes, my head looking down and I have to make a massive effort so I can look to my front, blinking back the darkness.
"Fuck, you are okay." Damien cries and I only have the strength to nod as I realize I've been tied up to the same chair again but this time is for real. The knots around my ankles and wrists are tight, the harsh ropes bruising my skin.
All that hurts is a spot on my neck, a sharp aching pain from the needle and I can't even believe Bella is helping Jace. It feels unreal.
I adjust my eyes to the clarity, finally managing to focus on the boy in front of me but when I do, I lose my breath.
Damien has a swollen eye, a deep cut on his upper lip and blood streams down from the side of his forehead.
My heart aches.
"Does it hurt too bad?" It's all I can whisper as I try to blink away the tears that dare to fall all over again. He shakes his head but I know he's lying. He always says what the others want to hear in situations like this.
"I need to tell you the truth, Lina, please." His hazel eyes plead, and if I just know if he could, he would get on his knees.
I have to take a deep breath, a battle between my heart and my mind taking place. I need to be rational, right? I'm in front of the boy who broke my trust, can I really trust him any longer?
I snort with my line of thinking, for a single moment forgetting where I am. We are both tied up and most probably will die at the end of the night, is there a better situation to listen to the emotional side of you, than this?
A nod is all he gets from me still and I bite my lip, tugging my nails on my palms in fists.
"I regret so badly what I did to you, Lina. I want to start apologizing but it's not for what you think." Tears start to take over his eyes and I have never seen Damien cry like this, "Before I met you, get to know who you really were, I didn't care about you at all. I asked for a simple kiss because perhaps you could fall in love with me. It became a stupid game, what I didn't expect was that I would fall for you as well." I hold my breath.
"Suddenly, you became my everything and I forgot I once saw you as a trophy, someone to conquer and then leave. I wanted to be with you so badly and for a short period, I could really taste what it feels like to have someone. But, Jace, made me end it all." The deep breath he takes breaks my heart, "After the accident, one he caused on purpose to make me leave you, I knew I had to do what he had asked. I couldn't be the reason for your death, gorgeous. I needed to get you away from me and the only way I knew you would leave me was to break your heart. I had to make you turn your love for me into hate."
"It was the worst night of my life. All I want is for you to be happy and I'm so fucking sorry for making you go through this much suffering. I never thought I was meant for love but you showed me otherwise, gorgeous. I found you at my lowest and I want to show you every single day my best. I love you more than I could ever think it was possible to love someone, Adelina."
When he finishes, I'm sobbing, an immense weight being lifted off my shoulders knowing that it wasn't all a lie. We are fucked up. He looks down in surrender and all I want is to touch him, make him look at me like we used to.
"I forgive you, bad boy." The words leave my lips and he can't even believe them when he looks up and straight into my eyes, all the air leaving my lungs. It's us.
At this moment, I don't get angry that he didn't tell me, all I want is to be with him. Fuck, it makes my cries even harder.
"I shouldn't have done this. I'm so stupid." All I feel is regret, it runs on my whole body. I'm so tired of everything, "I'm so sorry."
"Hey, look at me. We will get out of here, alright? It will be okay." His voice breaks at the end but he crooks a smile in my direction, causing me to smile weakly. I nod, trying to find the strength to continue.
I can't prepare myself for the whisper in my ear.
"Two love birds, isn't that so special? Too bad one of them will watch the other die." Jace's hot breath tingles my skin and my stomach twists. My heart beats in an unsteady rhythm.
I can only do one thing when he steps in front of me at my eye level. I spit on his face.
The Cobra's leader is caught off guard, flinching and opening his mouth in disgust. I feel the slightest victory but when his eyes open flickering with irritation, I regret my actions.
"Bitch." He grabs my face, holding me so hard his hand will leave a mark and smashes his lips on mine. Damien screams but it's useless. Bile rises up from my throat and I struggle against his grip, tears brimming my eyes from the force.
Jace bites my lip before parting away, the bitter taste of blood taking over my mouth but I don't let him win, I don't let the tears fall.
I swallow the pain.
"Let's see, who will die first? We can play a little game," A loud alarm sets off the exact moment Jace finishes his sentence and the entire place goes dark. Sounds of guns being fired and screams taking over the building and I can hear my heart being so fast that it might escape my chest.
I shrink with every gunshot, hoping it's something in our favor and when the emergency lights turn on, leaving all the ambient red, I know it is.
Jace is on the floor while Damien kicks him on the stomach and I see Chadwick fighting some guy on the right. Delicate hands untie my knots and I can breathe in relief when I see a glance of honey blonde hair beside me.
"Never do this again, alright? I almost had a heart attack." I let out a gasp when Kayla sets me free. She hugs me tightly before I can even stand up.
It doesn't last long since someone attacks her from behind and she kicks him, parting away to take care of the big guy and I see someone coming in my direction, knife in hand.
"You don't really think I would let you leave, right, Lina?" Ella's voice is high-pitched, being even higher because of the mess that's happening and I roll my eyes before getting ready to fight her.
The adrenaline is rushing through my veins and I don't feel any pain, all I want is to take her down.
She comes, the blade pointed towards me. I dodge it easily, hitting her with my elbow. Bella drops the knife with a shriek and I use the advantage to elbow her face.
My ex-best friend tries to block it but she's too slow and my hit makes her fall to the floor. Her nose is bleeding and I whisper in her ear before taking another needle with the same liquid she used on me from her pocket.
"Get a fucking life, Ella, and leave us the fucking alone." She tries to say something back but it's useless. I press the fucking thing on her neck. Relief takes over me but it's too short.
I look back to where everyone was fighting and my body freezes.
Jace has a gun pointed at me. His face is a mess, blood on all sides. Damien is on the floor next to him, groaning in pain and when his eyes focus on what will happen, they go wide.
My breath is suddenly gone. My cries get louder. There's nothing to do now.
"Say hi to Scarlett for me, sweetheart." I close my eyes and the horrible sound of a gunshot fills my ears. I wait for the pain but it never comes.
What happ-
When I open my eyes, a scream dies in my throat. I paralyze, in shock with what I see in front of me and I cry so hard I might pass out.
No.
No.
No.
Damien is lying on the floor, blood pouring from his collarbone, close to his neck and I get close to him, running my hands through his handsome face.
"Don't leave me, please. I can't." He runs his thumb through my cheek slowly and I sob, my entire body shaking. "I love you, please, Damien." I rest my forehead against his, coughs starting to break out from his throat and I pour my heart and soul, crying for his dear life.
"I wish we had more time but I'm glad I spent it with you." A sob erupts on my lips as I hear his faint voice and it's so much pain.
It's all my fault.
"You will be alright, fight for me, bad boy." Chadwick and some other guy reach us, not losing time to lift Damien up and I sob so hard I can't see anything. I only feel someone taking me and making me stand up.
I see everything in a blur. I'm trembling, my feet walking fast and taking me somewhere and I can only hear screams around me as someone directs me inside a car.
My sobs are uncontrollable, so loud it feels like silence, and just when I feel the car moving, I find the last ounce of strength to open my eyes.
There's so much blood, everywhere. In my dress, on my hands, on my legs. Gosh.
"Where is he?" I don't recognize my own voice, it being so faint and broken but luckily the person driving hears it.
The sentence alone is enough to break my heart.
"We are heading to the nearest hospital, Lina." I recognize the person who's holding everything together, Kayla's voice being a melodic and unforgettable tone, and I can only nod, shutting my eyes again.
I pray he's alright. Damien can't be dead.
He can't.
He can't.
"My brother needs you now. Don't you dare give up as well." She's rigid and it makes me open my eyes instantly. I bite my hand to muffle the sobs, each breath being harder to take than the last but I know she's right.
We are all going through so much. If I freak out, it's just another burden for her.
Gosh, there's so much to say. I put her brother in this position, I don't think I will ever be able to make things right again.
Kayla drives every red light while I pray to any God, all Gods, that Damien will be alright. I never had faith, not when God could have saved my brother from suffering but I have to hold on to something.
This can't be the end.
The second I see the car in front of us pulling up, Damien senselessly being carried out by two guys I don't recognize, I feel my heart stop in my throat.
This is all real.
I leave as soon as Kayla stops, not giving a care if it's parked in a prohibited area and the lights of the hospital almost make me puke.
I hate being here, it's where my life collapsed for the first time. My mother entered and never left and I could say the same about my dad. Once he lost his wife, he left a monster.
I lost both of my parents that day.
My breath is unsteady. I look up to the sky not to have a panic attack here, not right now. This place brings too many memories.
"C'mon, Adelina!" Chadwick is the one to call me now, his hand being around Kayla in a tight grip, holding it all for both of them and that's what makes me take the first step.
The boy I love needs me. My love for him is insanely greater than fear.
I run over to them, leaving all my fears outside and only managing to be strong for us both.
The bad boy and me.
We take the elevator to the eighth, somehow the Stones already know where Damien has been allocated and I don't look at any of them while the numbers on the panel take an eternity to reach our destination.
I can't.
They don't say a thing either.
A chilling white hallway opens up for us, double doors on the end where the surgery room takes place, and by the two guys in front, the same ones who carried Damien I know he's inside.
I didn't expect any less, not when there was so much blood. I look at my clothes again, my hands, my skin and I feel like throwing up.
"I will talk to the guys, alright? Sit, get some water," Chadwick says, looking at both of us, "He will be alright, you know how much of a fighter he is." He kisses the top of Kayla's head who has her back to me all the time and I can only nod, leaving them behind to find a bathroom.
As soon as I do, I head straight to the sink, rubbing my skin until it gets bruised to rip away all the blood. It's too much, gosh.
The water takes away Damien's blood. I take a look in the mirror, regretting instantly.
Never in my life, I've looked this tired. My hair is chaos, roots taking place on the length and deep bags take place in my eyes. Jace's hands are imprinted on my skin from how hard he gripped me and the cut on my lip from his bite is deep. I feel the bile rise up in my throat.
Luckily, he's dead now.
I'm a fucking mess and just want to get out of this dress. The stains make me relive it all, flashes of what happened taking my breath away. Tears brim my eyes all over again.
Fuck. It wasn't supposed to be like this. We shouldn't have been here.
I wash my face and close my eyes before going back to the hallway.
The minute I sit down on the opposite side of her, the benches in front of each other being the only thing to sit on, Kayla looks in my direction with a blaming gaze and I know if she could, she would fight me. Her brother's life is at risk because of me and I deserve it.
I will martyrize myself for the rest of my life.
Chadwick comes in our direction seconds later, running nervously his hand through his hair and just now I notice his right eye swollen from a punch, everyone went through hell. His expression ain't good and I know something's up.
Damien was in so much pain.
"He's in surgery. They are trying to remove the bullet from his collarbone before he loses too much blood but it's a critical operation. It's too close to the nerves on the neck. All we can do is wait now." A sob erupts from my throat with his words, my hand being the thing to muffle my cries and I'm so ashamed that I can only look down, trying to focus on anything but my heart slamming against my chest.
He will be alright. He needs to.
Seconds, minutes, hours, I don't know much time passes by until the doctor appears. My tears have dried and I sigh in relief as he gets closer to us, making me stand up instantly.
Yet, the sorrowful expression he carries on his face is enough to make my heart stop.
"How is he?" Kayla's voice is faint, so different from when she's happy and Chadwick hugs her from behind as they expect the answer.
"We did our best, the bullet was too deep but we managed to remove it and stop the bleeding." All of us sigh but when the doctor continues our breaths turn frantic, "Unfortunately, it was too close to an artery, and the process of removing it affected his blood circulation and his nerves."
Breathe.
Breathe.
I'm paralyzed.
"Just tell us already!" Kayla is on the verge of breaking, tears streaming down her cheeks, and just now I realize it's one of the only times I've seen her cry.
And it's all my fault.
Breathe.
Breathe.
Breathe.
"He's in a coma. For how long we don't know, we expect-" The second I hear the word 'coma', a loud sob erupts from my lips. I fall back on the bench. I don't hear what else the doctor has to say, all I feel is the excruciating pain taking place in my chest, my heart.
It's in my entire body.
Damien is in a coma. The love of my life is asleep, numb in a hospital bed and there's nothing we can do. No money in the world can change this fact.
I cry so hard I have to rest my head in my hands, everyone around me disappearing. Everyone's pain but mine is worst.
I'm the one to blame for his situation. Damien can't live anymore because of me while I'm here.
It was supposed to be me.
Gosh, why?
It takes me hours to recover, to stop crying, and take a deep breath. The Stones are in a room, talking about the future perhaps. Damien's parents arrived shortly after the doctor left the surgery and I don't know why but Kayla hasn't told them what truly happened, who is the person to blame.
I can only thank her because his father would have killed me for doing this to his son.
It's my turn now to see Damien, some nurse informs me as soon as I can open my eyes, and I nod, having to gather the pieces of my heart before seeing him. It's too much to bear.
I follow her, each step being harder than the next, and I gasp when we enter his room. The bad boy is asleep on the bed, all his cuts and bruises have been taken care of and if there weren't tubes and the heart monitor, anyone would tell he's only sleeping.
It hurts.
The nurse leaves us alone and when I get next to him, I have to look up not to cry again, letting the tears wash my feelings away.
My movements are hesitant, my heart frantic and I kiss his hand before opening my eyes to run my hands through his hair as I loved to.
Seeing him it's heartbreaking but it installs a feeling of hope inside me. He will wake up. I just have to be strong for him.
I make a promise.
"I will always wait for you, bad boy." It's a faint whisper that leaves my lips on his skin and I rest my forehead against his.
It's my vow to the universe that he will wake up no matter what. No matter for how long, I will be here, for him. It's the least I can do.
Damien Stone showed me what it's like to truly live. And I will, for us.
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{A/N: Please, don't kill me, lol. Hey babes! Last chapter of Becoming Bad, how does it feel like? No despair, we still have an epilogue left. What a ride, huh? I really hope you enjoyed reading this chapter, comment, and vote, it means a lot.
I love you all from the bottom of my heart. Ally.}