"There was a new Gurg, Golgomath." Hagrid sighed deeply. "Well, we hadn' bargained on a new Gurg two days after we'd made friendly contact with the firs' one, an' we had a funny feelin' Golgomath wouldn' be so keen ter listen to us, but we had ter try."
"You went to speak to him?" asked Ron incredulously. "After you'd watched him rip off another giant's head?"
"'Course we did," said Hagrid, "we hadn' gone all that way ter give up after two days! We wen' down with the next present we'd meant ter give ter Karkus.
"I knew it was no go before I'd opened me mouth. He was sitting there wearin' Karkus's helmet, leerin' at us as we got nearer. He's massive, one o' the biggest ones there. Black hair an' matchin' teeth an' a necklace o' bones. Human-lookin' bones, some of 'em. Well, I gave it a go— held out a great roll o' dragon skin— an' said 'A gift fer the Gurg of the giants—' Nex' thing I knew, I was hangin' upside down in the air by me feet, two of his mates had grabbed me." Hermione clapped her hands over her mouth.
"How did you get out of that?" asked Harry.
"Wouldn'ta done if Olympe hadn' bin there," said Hagrid. "She pulled out her wand an' did some o' the fastes' spellwork I've ever seen. Ruddy marvelous. Hit the two holin' me right in the eyes with Conjunctivitus Curses an' they dropped me straightaway— bu' we were in trouble then, 'cause we'd used magic against 'em, an' that's what giants hate abou' wizards. We had ter leg it an' we knew there was no way we was going ter be able ter march inter camp again."
"Blimey, Hagrid," said Ron quietly.
"So how come it's taken you so long to get home if you were only there for three days?" asked Hermione.
"We didn' leave after three days!" said Hagrid, looking outraged. "Dumbledore was relyin' on us!"
"But you've just said there was no way you could go back!"
"Not by daylight, we couldn', no. We just had ter rethink a bit. Spent a couple o' days lyin' low up in the cave an' watchin'. An' wha' we saw wasn' good."
"Did he rip off more heads?" asked Hermione, sounding squeamish.
"No," said Hagrid. "I wish he had."
"What d'you mean?"
"I mean we soon found out he didn' object ter all wizards— just us."
"Death Eaters?" Harry said quickly.
"Yep," said Hagrid darkly. "Couple of 'em were visitin' him ev'ry day bringin' gifts ter the Gurg, an' he wasn' dangling them upside down."
"How did you know they were Death Eaters?" (Y/n) asked.
"Because I recognized one of 'em," Hagrid growled. "Macnair, remember him? Bloke they sent ter kill Buckbeak? Maniac, he is. Likes killin' as much as Golgomath, no wonder they were gettin' on so well."
"So Macnair's persuaded the giants to join You-Know-Who?" said Hermione desperately.
"Hold yer hippogriffs, I haven' finished me story yet!" said Hagrid indignantly, who, considering he had not wanted to tell them anything in the first place, now seemed to be rather enjoying himself. "Me an' Olympe talked it over an' we agreed, jus' 'cause the Gurg looked like favourin' You-Know-Who didn' mean all of 'em would. We had ter try an' persuade some o' the others, the ones who hadn' wanted Golgomath as Gurg."
"How could you tell which ones they were?" asked Ron.
"Well, they were the ones bein' beaten to a pulp, weren' they?" said Hagrid patiently. "The ones with any sense were keepin' outta Golgomath's way, hidin' out in caves roun' the gully jus' like we were. So we decided we'd go pokin' round the caves by night an' see if we couldn' persuade a few o' them."
"You went poking around dark caves looking for giants?" said Ron with awed respect in his voice.
"Well, it wasn' the giants who worried us most," said Hagrid. "We were more concerned abou' the Death Eaters. Dumbledore had told us before we wen' not ter tangle with 'em if we could avoid it, an' the trouble was they knew we was around— 'spect Golgomath told him abou' us. At night when the giants were sleepin' an' we wanted ter be creepin' inter the caves, Macnair an' the other one were sneakin' round the mountains lookin' fer us. I was hard put to stop Olympe jumpin' out at them," said Hagrid, the corners of his mouth lifting his wild beard. "She was rarin' ter attack 'em... She's somethin' when she's roused, Olympe... Fiery, yeh know... 'spect it's the French in her..."
Hagrid gazed misty-eyed into the fire. Harry allowed him thirty seconds of reminiscence before clearing his throat loudly.
"So what happened? Did you ever get near any of the other giants?"
"What? Oh... oh yeah, we did. Yeah, on the third night after Karkus was killed, we crept outta the cave we'd bin hidin' in and headed back down inter the gully, keepin' our eyes skinned fer the Death Eaters. Got inside a few o' the caves, no go— then, in abou' the sixth one, we found three giants hidin'."
"Cave must've been cramped," said Ron.
"Wasn' room ter swing a kneazle," said Hagrid.
"Didn't they attack you when they saw you?" asked Hermione.
"Probably woulda done if they'd bin in any condition," said Hagrid, "but they was badly hurt, all three o' them. Golgomath's lot had beaten 'em unconscious; they'd woken up an' crawled inter the nearest shelter they could find. Anyway, one o' them had a bit of English an' 'e translated fer the others, an' what we had ter say didn' seem ter go down too badly. So we kep' goin' back, visitin' the wounded... I reckon we had abou' six or seven o' them convinced at one poin'."
"Six or seven?" said Ron eagerly. "Well, that's not bad— are they going to come over here and start fighting You-Know-Who with us?"
But (Y/n) said, "What do you mean 'at one point,' Hagrid?" Hagrid looked at her sadly.
"Golgomath's lot raided the caves. The ones tha' survived didn' wan' no more ter do with us after that."
"So... so there aren't any giants coming?" said Ron, looking disappointed.
"Nope," said Hagrid, heaving a deep sigh as he turned over his steak again and applied the cooler side to his face, "but we did wha' we meant ter do, we gave 'em Dumbledore's message an' some o' them heard it an' I 'spect some o' them'll remember it. Jus' maybe, them that don' want ter stay around Golgomath'll move outta the mountains, an' there's gotta be a chance they'll remember Dumbledore's friendly to 'em... Could be they'll come..."
Snow was filling up the window now. Harry became aware that the knees of his robes were soaked through; Fang was drooling with his head in Harry's lap.
"Hagrid?" said Hermione quietly after a while.
"Mmm?"
"Did you... was there any sign of... did you hear anything about your... your... mother while you were there?"
Hagrid's unobscured eye rested upon her, and Hermione looked rather scared.
"I'm sorry... I... forget it—"
"Dead," Hagrid grunted. "Died years ago. They told me."
"Oh... I'm... I'm really sorry," said Hermione in a very small voice.
Hagrid shrugged his massive shoulders. "No need," he said shortly. "Can' remember her much. Wasn' a great mother."
They were silent again. Hermione glanced nervously at Harry, Ron, and (Y/n), plainly wanting them to speak. (Y/n), however, seemed to be in a sort of trance. She flew to her feet and over to the window, trying to subtly out of it, much to their confusion.
"But you still haven't explained how you got in this state, Hagrid," Ron said, gesturing toward Hagrid's bloodstained face.
"Or why you're back so late," said Harry. "Sirius says Madame Maxime got back ages ago—"
"Who attacked you?" said Ron.
"I haven' bin attacked!" said Hagrid emphatically. "I—"
"Shhhh!" (Y/n) hissed urgently, darting from the window. No sooner had she reached the table was there a sudden outbreak of rapping on the door. Hermione gasped; her mug slipped through her fingers and smashed on the floor; Fang yelped. All five of them stared at the window beside the doorway.
"Is it—?" Ron whispered. (Y/n) nodded.
"Get under here!" Harry said quickly; seizing the Invisibility Cloak, he whirled it over himself and Hermione. Ron and (Y/n) were quick to follow their lead. Opting to save space, (Y/n) quickly turned into her fox, to which Hermione picked her up. Fang was barking madly at the door. Hagrid looked thoroughly confused.
"Hagrid, hide our mugs!"
Hagrid seized Harry's, Ron's, and (Y/n)'s mugs and shoved them under the cushion in Fang's basket. Fang was now leaping up at the door; Hagrid pushed him out of the way with his foot and pulled it open.
Professor Umbridge was standing in the doorway wearing her green tweed cloak and a matching hat with earflaps. Lips pursed, she leaned back so as to see Hagrid's face; she barely reached his navel.
"So," said Umbridge slowly and loudly as though speaking to somebody deaf. "You're Hagrid, are you?" Without waiting for an answer she strolled into the room, her bulging eyes rolling in every direction. "Get away," she snapped, waving her handbag at Fang, who had bounded up to her and was attempting to lick her face before catching the scent of an animal and beginning to search.
"Er— I don' want ter be rude," said Hagrid, staring at her, "but who the ruddy hell are you?"
"My name is Dolores Umbridge." Her eyes were sweeping the cabin. Twice they stared directly into the corner where the four teenagers stood, grouped together.
"Dolores Umbridge?" Hagrid said, sounding thoroughly confused. "I thought you were one o' them Ministry— don' you work with Fudge?"
"I was Senior Undersecretary to the Minister, yes," said Umbridge, now pacing around the cabin, taking in every tiny detail within, from the haversack against the wall to the abandoned cloak. "I am now the Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher—"
"Tha's brave of yeh," said Hagrid, "there's not many'd take tha' job anymore—"
"—and Hogwarts High Inquisitor," said Umbridge, giving no sign that she had heard him.
"What's that?" said Hagrid, frowning.
"Precisely what I was going to ask," said Umbridge, pointing at the broken shards of china on the floor that had been Hermione's mug.
"Oh," said hagrid with a most unhelpful glance toward the corner where Harry, Ron, Hermione, and (Y/n) were hidden, "oh, tha' was... was Fang. He broke a mug. So I had ter use this one instead."
Hagrid pointed to the mug from which he had been drinking, one hand still clamped over the dragon steak pressed to his eye. Umbridge stood facing him now, taking in every detail of his appearance instead of the cabin's.
"I heard voices," said Umbridge quietly.
"I was talkin' ter Fang," said Hagrid stoutly.
"And he was talking back to you?"
"Well... in a manner o' speaking," said Hagrid, looking uncomfortable. "I sometimes say Fang's near enough human—"
"There are three sets of footprints in the snow leading from the castle doors to your cabin," said Umbridge sleekly.
Hermione gasped; Harry clapped a hand over her mouth. Luckily, Fang was sniffing loudly around the room and Umbridge did not appear to have heard.
"Well, I on'y jus' got back," said Hagrid, waving an enormous hand at the haversack. "Maybe someone came ter call earlier an' I missed 'em."
"There are no footsteps leading away from your cabin door."
"Well I... I don' know why that'd be..." said Hagrid, tugging nervously at his beard and again glancing toward the corner where the four stood as though asking for help. "Erm..."
Umbridge wheeled around and strode the length of the cabin, looking around carefully. She bent and peered under the bed. She opened Hagrid's cupboards. She passed within two inches of where Harry, Ron, and Hermione stood pressed against the wall; Harry actually pulled in his stomach as she walked by. After looking carefully inside the enormous cauldron Hagrid used for cooking she wheeled around again and said, "What has happened to you? How did you sustain those injuries?"
Hagrid hastily removed the dragon steak from his face, which, in Harry's opinion, was a mistake because the black-and-purple bruising all around his eye was now clearly visible, not to mention the large amount of fresh and congealed blood on his face. "Oh, I... had a bit of an accident," he said lamely.
"What sort of accident?"
"I-I tripped."
"You tripped," Umbridge repeated coolly.
"Yeah, tha's right. Over... over a friend's broomstick. I don' fly meself. Well, look at the size o' me. I don' reckon there's a broomstick that'd hold me. Friend o' mine breeds Abrazan horses. I dunno if you've ever seen 'em, big beasts, winged, yeh know, I've had a bit of a ride on one o' them an' it was—"
"Where have you been?" asked Umbridge, cutting coolly through Hagrid's babbling.
"Where've I...?"
"Been, yes," Umbridge said. "Term started more than two months ago. Another teacher has had to cover your classes. None of your colleagues has been able to give me any information as to your whereabouts. You left no address. Where have you been?"
There was a pause in which Hagrid stared at her with his newly uncovered eye. Harry could almost hear his brain working furiously.
"I— I've been away for me health," Hagrid said.
"For your health," said Umbridge. Her eyes travelled over Hagrid's discoloured and swollen face; dragon blood dripped gently onto his waistcoat in the silence. "I see."
"Yeah," said Hagrid, "bit o'— o' fresh air, yeh know—"
"Yes, as gamekeeper fresh air must be so difficult to come by," said Umbridge sweetly. The small patch of Hagrid's face that was not black or purple flushed.
"Well— change o' scene, yeh know—"
"Mountain scenery?" said Umbridge swiftly.
"Mountains?" Hagrid repeated, clearly thinking fast. "Nope, South of France fer me. Bit o' sun an'... an' sea."
"Really?" said Umbridge. "You don't have much of a tan."
"Yeah... well... sensitive skin," said Hagrid, attempting an ingratiating smile. Harry noticed that two of his teeth had been knocked out. Umbridge looked at him coldly; his smile faltered. Then she hoisted her handbag a little higher into the crook of her arm and said, "I shall, of course, be informing the Minister of your late return."
"Righ'," said Hagrid, nodding.
"You ought to know too that as High Inquisitor it is my unfortunate but necessary duty to inspect my fellow teachers. So I daresay we shall meet again soon enough." Umbridge turned sharply and marched to the door.
"You're inspectin' us?" Hagrid echoed blankly, looking after her.
"Oh yes," said Umbridge softly, looking back at him with her hand on the door handle. "The Ministry is determined to weed out unsatisfactory teachers, Hagrid. Good night." She left, closing the door behind her. Harry made to pull off the Invisibility Cloak but Hermione seized his wrist.
"Not yet," Hermione breathed in his ear. "She might not be gone yet." Hagrid seemed to be thinking the same way; he stumped across the room and pulled back the curtain an inch or so.
"She's goin' back ter the castle," Hagrid said in a low voice. "Blimey... inspectin' people, is she?"
"Yeah, said Harry, pulling the Cloak off. Hermione flew to her feet to avoid Fang's attempts at sniffing (Y/n). "Trelawney's on probation already..."
"Um... what sort of thing are you planning to do with us in class, Hagrid?" Hermione asked, stepping around Ron and Harry, who were giving Hermione the chance to get away without injuring the fox in her arms.
"Oh, don' you worry abou' that, I've got a great load o' lessons planned," said Hagrid enthusiastically, scooping up his dragon steak from the table and slapping it over his eye again. "I've bin keepin' a couple o' creatures saved fer yer O.W.L. year, you wait, they're somethin' really special."
"Erm... special in what way?" asked Hermione tentatively.
"I'm not sayin'," said Hagrid happily. "I don' want ter spoil the surprise."
"Look, Hagrid," said Hermione urgently, dropping all pretence, "Professor Umbridge won't be at all happy if you bring anything to class that's too dangerous—"
"Dangerous?" said Hagrid, looking genially bemused. "Don' be silly, I wouldn' give yeh anythin' dangerous! I mean, all righ', they can look after themselves—"
"Hagrid, you've got to pass Umbridge's inspection, and to do that it would really be better if she saw you teaching us how to look after porlocks, how to tell the difference between knarls and hedgehogs, stuff like that!" said Hermione earnestly.
"But tha's not very interestin', Hermione," said Hagrid. "The stuff I've got's much more impressive, I've bin bringin' 'em on fer years, I reckon I've got the on'y domestic herd in Britain—"
"Hagrid... please..." said Hermione, a note of real desperation in her voice. "Umbridge is looking for any excuse to get rid of teachers she thinks are too close to Dumbledore. Please, Hagrid, teach us something dull that's bound to come up in our O.W.L..." But Hagrid merely yawned widely and cast a one-eyed look of longing toward the vast bed in the corner.
"Lis'en, it's bin a long day an' it's getting late," Hagrid said, patting Hermione gently on the shoulder, so that her knees gave way and she hit the floor with a thud. (Y/n) yelped. "Oh— sorry—" He pulled Hermione back up by the neck of her robes. "Look, don' you go worryin' abou' me, I promise yeh I've got really good stuff planned fer yer lessons now I'm back... Now you lot had better get back up to the castle, an' don' forget ter wipe yer footprints out behind yeh!"
"I dunno if you got through to him," said Ron a short while later when, having checked that the coast was clear, they walked back up to the castle through the thickening snow, leaving no trace behind them due to the Obliteration Charm Hermione was performing as they went.
"Then I'll go back again tomorrow," said Hermione determinedly. "I'll plan his lessons for him if I have to. I don't care if she throws out Trelawney but she's not taking Hagrid!"
To the trio's amusement, a fox would leap a foot into the air ahead of them every so often, for the snow was too deep for foxes. Due to (Y/n) reaching the steps first, she quickly hurried through them and turned back into herself, brushing snow from her.
"You aren't wearing a jacket," Hermione frowned.
"Why'd you think I stayed a fox up until now?" (Y/n) asked, raising an eyebrow. "I heard the exact moment Hagrid returned, so I went to meet him in the forest... as a fox... without grabbing my jacket."
"That's why there's no trace? The snow-covered your footprints."
"Mhm."