'Ahhhh, that was embarrassing,' Yeomin thought. Her eyes and nose burned from how many times she rubbed at them. Even though she had stopped crying a while ago, her face remained red and puffy. She didn't remember crying so much in front of her parents since she was a little kid. She probably looked like a mess.
A warm hand tensed around hers, and she looked down at her father who was leaned over the edge of the bed. When Yeomin first started crying, he grabbed one of her hands and pulled up a chair right next to the bed. Even after her tears stopped, he stayed there, right next to her.
Though that was mainly because he had passed out on her blanket.
Snoring in a rumpled suit with his face pressed up into his crossed arms, he looked kinda stupid. Smiling slightly, Yeomin squeezed his hand back.
Behind the curtain, Yeomin could see the silhouette of her mother as she talked on the phone.
"I'm going to take a couple weeks off of work. I don't want to leave you here all alone," her mother had told her earlier, smoothing out her hair.
The sentence nearly made Yeomin tear up all over again. Instead, she just sent her mom a weak smile, hiding the burst of relief that lightened her entire body.
As she glanced back at her parents, Yeomin felt a sense of levity that she hadn't felt in a while.
'They don't appear in the story,' Yeomin told herself. She looked at her father's hand that nearly engulfed hers in its grasp.
'I think...I think I can trust this.'
――――――――――
Not really knowing what to expect, Yeomin had expected her stay in the hospital to be more full of appointments, tests, and medical procedures. But, while there were a lot of those, her schedule consisted, primarily, of nothing.
With her phone being a smashed, unusable mess, there was only one thing she ended up doing during that time: watching TV (and enduring her mother's complaints about watching too much TV).
Truthfully, once her father had figured out how to operate the weird, configurable screen in the corner that looked more like a dentist's lamp than anything else, there was no going back.
And that was how she ended up hugging a pillow and watching random cliche dramas with her dad.
"Bonding experience," he said.
'An excuse to watch shows without Mom calling him a layabout,' Yeomin thought.
After the long period where she would only see her father for a few days at a time between business trips, she forgot how addicted to these shows he actually was. Personally, Yeomin didn't care for them much. Still, the intensity with which he stared at the screen made her unwilling to change it.
"What about Hannuel?" a girl with short, black hair said. She leaned against the bathroom wall coolly while another girl with hair in a high ponytail stood awkwardly to the side.
"Hanneul! " Fixing her long brown hair in the mirror, the other girl scoffed. "No way! That creep? I'd rather die," the brunette said dramatically.
The camera cut to a close-up of the ponytail girl's furrowed face.
―Two days ago―
Yeomin snorted at the white vignette that came over the screen.
The ponytail girl walked down the hallway, carrying a large stack of papers in her arms. Then, out of nowhere, she tripped and papers flew all over the floor.
With an embarrassed look, she kneeled down to pick them up. In the corner of the frame, another person kneeled down alongside her. She looked up, startled.
A guy with shaggy back hair and glasses gathered some of the papers and tried to hand it to her. They locked eyes and stared at each other.
The camera lingered on their stare, focusing on each of their faces.
"Who stares at another person this long?"
"Shush."
"Um, thank you..." The girl finally broke the staring contest and grabbed the papers out of his hand.
Smiling, the boy nodded before saying something and leaving.
Freezing, the girl gaped at him.
In a minor flashback, the screen showed a close-up of the boy's face, and the audio of his words finally plays.
"You should be more careful, next time."
'Oh wow, the guy who doesn't talk to anyone talked to her. What a development,' Yeomin thought in a deadpan manner.
Ponytail girl stayed frozen, kneeling on the floor with the papers in hand.
―Present day―
After another moment of hesitation, the girl spoke up, "Hey...no need to be rude, he's not that bad"
"Rude?" The brunette stopped. "Rude? What? Do you like him?"
As the mocking thoughts from earlier petered out, Yeomin was left with a rising discomfort.
Turning away from the mirror, the brunette sent an accusatory stare toward Ponytail girl. Taken aback, she flailed trying to make a response.
"That's not―I was just saying―"
Walking towards her suddenly, the brunette interrupted her speech. "If you want him, you should go ahead and take him. Trash should stay together after all~"
"Ahh, I feel dirty. Come on, Ha Eun, let's go."
With a needlessly dramatic flair, the brunette and the girl with black hair walked out of the bathroom.
"God, she's such an eyesore." Their voices carried as the door closed.
Looking at a loss, Ponytail girl pauses, standing still as the ending credit's music plays.
"She's so unreasonable! You can't just hate people because they don't agree with you!" her father complained, getting up to fiddle with the screen.
Awkwardly, Yeomin stayed silent. Shame slid down her back as a cold shiver.
'That's basically how I treated Ham Dan-I.'
Yeomin stared at her leg, which flared with an imaginary itch. 'Just because she wouldn't hate Yeoryeong, I said those things...'
"...Sorry. I said too much."
Yeomin winced, thinking back to her words. Even an idiot could tell she didn't mean a word of what she said. Dan-I really deserved another apology. A genuine apology. They were actual friends, even if only for a moment. Though Yeomin now knows she only did it to avoid Yeoryeong, Dan-I did legitimately try to be her friend. She was one of the few that did. Disregarding that just because she wouldn't hate Yeoryeong, her childhood friend? It was too much.
Truthfully, it felt odd to think about this. From the story, Yeomin knows that her older self is supposed to apologise as well. Really, it should be a relief that at least in the future she's not considered a total villain but...
"I can't remember why I hated her and circulated such petty rumours."
For Yeomin, it didn't feel right. It felt like a cop-out. It didn't feel like her.
Because she did remember.
She remembered every part of Yeoryeong that annoyed her.
Her perfect hair, her eyes that sparkled more than literal amethysts, the ease at which she topped the school ranking, her unapproachable demeanour which only seemed to soften around Ham Dan-I or the Four Heavenly Kings. Even her voice was irritatingly pleasant to listen to. Her perfection pissed Yeomin off to her core.
And to a degree, it still did.
She still felt those instinctual feelings of dislike even as regret over her actions consumed her. It just lingered like a damned parasite. The only difference now was...
Glimpses flashed in Yeomin's mind. Of Yeoryeong's hurt expression towards Ham Dan-I. Of her worrying over her best friend hating her. Of Yeoryeong crying as her fears came to fruition. Of Yeoryeong, in the story, hesitating over getting close to others due to too many people who would talk behind her back―too many people like Yeomin.
...she knew simple dislike and even hatred didn't excuse her behaviour.
Part of Yeomin wanted to believe that it was just the story that made her feel this way. It was the story that made her this jealous, this vindictive, and this hateful.
Part of Yeomin thought it wouldn't matter either way. Her actions spoke for themselves.
Either way...they deserved another apology, and this time Yeomin had a lot more to regret than "saying too much."
――――――――――
"Yeomin," her father said, pausing the TV show.
"Hmm?" Yeomin paused, with a spoonful of pudding halfway shoved in her mouth. As the girl and her mother turned towards him, she tried to swallow her food―
"Do you want to be homeschooled?"
―And promptly choked.
Her father laughed at her pain as she coughed her lungs out, before patting her back roughly. Eventually, Yeomin cleared her throat and let out a small "w h a t."
Glancing at her mother, he started to explain, "I figured―well, your mom and I figured―it might be a good idea to homeschool you."
Yeomin waited for more. Her father just stared at her as if the words themselves were enough.
Sighing, her mother piped in, "since you are missing a lot of school days already and homeschooling would give you a more flexible schedule to complete your work."
"And you timed it well too, it's early enough into the school year that transferring will be easy."
Yeomin's mother looked absolutely affronted. "Ha-Jun!"
"What?" he asked dumbly. She smacked him with the cover end of her book
"Timed it well?" the woman said in a furious whisper as if that would stop Yeomin from hearing it. She smacked him again.
"Ah, stop! Stop!" He raised his hands defensively before looking at Yeomin. "Sorry, bad phrasing."
Like father, like daughter, Yeomin also snickered at his pain. Unfortunately for Yeomin, as her father, he was allowed to aggressively ruffle her hair in retaliation.
"So, what do you think?"
Hands protectively covering her head, Yeomin froze.
'Leaving Ji Jon...'
It left an acrid taste in her mouth.
She didn't want to leave, at least not before rectifying the situation between her, Ban Yeoryeong and Ham Dan-I. She couldn't apologise if she was gone.
But...
On the other hand, she didn't know how she'd react if she saw them again. Would she fall back into the same pattern that led to this predicament in the first place?
...
Thinking about it unsettled her. She didn't want to feel this way. She didn't want to feel this hatred and bitterness. The never-ending guilt. She just wanted it over with. But, these emotions seemed to be the only thing she felt when she thought about the whole situation.
As if sensing her struggle, her father said slowly, "I know it's a hard decision, but it's not set in stone. If you try out homeschooling and figure out you don't like it, you can always transfer back."
Her mother joined in. "We just think it might be easier for right now―since we don't know how long this process is going to take."
' "We just think it might be easier"... it probably would be. I wouldn't have to scramble to make up for the missed work and...'
Staring at both of her parents' sympathetic faces, Yeomin could feel her reservations breaking down. Yeomin felt like she had both been given the final say and no say at all.
"...Okay."
Her dad ruffled her hair again, but the action had lost the playfulness of earlier.
'I can go back when I get out of here. That way I'll have some time to cut out the story's influence. If I go there now, I might just make it worse. If I go back later, I'll be able to apologise properly, with no unnecessary negative feelings,' Yeomin reasoned.
Her mind wasn't convinced.
――――――――――
"Here's your new phone," her father said. Unceremoniously, he dropped a white box onto her lap.
Yeomin looked up from her book vaguely confused but not surprised.
Although hanging out with her parents for the past week was fun, they couldn't avoid work forever. And, with Yeomin's phone thoroughly smashed and unable to turn on, they needed a way to contact her.
He dropped another small container on her lap. "Try out your old SD card first, and if that doesn't work, I can get another of those as well." Placing the rest of his stuff down on the visitor's chair quickly, he waved and headed towards the door.
"Anyways, figure it out. I'm going to the bathroom."
With an incredulous look on her face, Yeomin laughed under her breath before examining the packages in front of her.
First, the phone. Ignoring the manual and charger, for now, she pulled out the phone and used a little tool to pop open the SD port.
Popping open the other box, she looked at the shambles of her other phone. She sighed, remorsefully. 'You've served me well.'
She opened up the SD port of her old phone.
With how much this phone most certainly tumbled when she got hit, the card looked like it was in surprisingly good condition. Then again, Yeomin knew nothing about how SD cards actually worked so...
'Might as well test it and see' Yeomin thought. Sliding the card into her new phone, she turned it on and crossed her fingers.
After the agonisingly long boot-up screen, she sped through the system questions and―
It worked! Pumping her fist at the success, she scrolled through her contact list to confirm everything was the same. After re-downloading her previous apps, she clicked on the messenger to tell her mother that the phone works.
「12 Unread Messages from Yura」
Hesitating for a second, she opened the conversation.
Yura
「I can forgive you ignoring me because you got called out and had your precious little pride hurt but really? Not telling me that you changed schools?」
「What the hell Yeomin, I thought we were friends」
「Guess even friendship doesn't stop you from being a rude bitch」
「Honestly, you know what, fuck you. Go be two-faced somewhere else.」
「I hope you never come back」
"Hey! Did it work?" Yeomin's father burst into the room. Yeomin jumped and quickly closed the messenger, leaving her phone limp in her hand. Walking closer, he looked at Yeomin and stopped.
"Uh, what's wrong?"
Yeomin blinked up at him. "Hmm? What do you mean?"
"You look like someone kicked a kitten in front of you." Concerned, he walked closer. "Did it not work?"
Yeomin scrambled to make her face more neutral. "Ah! No, no, it worked. I just―" She looked into the distance. "I realised how much stuff I lost on my old phone."
With a look of understanding, her father sat down next to her and patted her back. "Sorry...I guess we'll just have to make even more memories to make up for it." Trying to cheer her up, he gave her a rueful smile.
Ignoring the cold drop in her stomach, she returned it with one of her own.
――――――――――
"I love you," her mother said suddenly, squeezing her hand.
Slightly startled, Yeomin snapped her head towards her with wide eyes. The woman smiled at her.
"I just do," she continued, "you're really amazing, you know."
"You've been through so much yet you've stayed so strong even without our help and I just―" She brought her head down to rest on Yeomin's knuckles, looking on the verge of tears. "I couldn't ask for a better kid."
The words hit Yeomin like a sack of bricks. An awful, unmistakable feeling of disgust clawed through her insides. She felt like a liar. She felt like a disappointment.
'Mom, you might be the only one who feels that way.'
Faced with the radiant love and affection of her mother, Yeomin wanted to vomit.
Tearing up, she tried to at least return her words. "Lo―" Her voice cracked. "Love you too, Mom."
The woman's resulting smile was as bright as the sun. Yeomin shrivelled in its light.
"Ahh, I'm getting too emotional," her mother said, wiping her eyes. "Come here, you."
As her mother grabbed her in a tight hug, the girl hugged her back hesitantly. Wrapped up in the warm embrace of her mother's love, the girl couldn't help but think she deserved none of it.
――――――――――
AN: Listen, this world may not have web novels but it will pry these cheesy K-dramas from my cold, dead hands.
Originally, I was planning to make this chapter a bit more light-hearted than the last one. But, uh, I think I might've failed on that front.
*sigh* I don't know why I even include the fluff tag at this point.