𝖎. The Strangest Day.
CLAIRE IS NOT QUITE SURE what to expect from this day. It is not exactly going to be her first day at her new job yet, since she is only stopping by to sign the contract—which she had insisted on instead of sending it through the mail, so she could coincidentally be one of the first people in England to meet the new coach of the football team. However, this would be her first time in years visiting AFC Richmond and it was not to watch a match. She would be getting a much closer look, working with the actual team she used to watch and support from the stands. Her documentary series have been successful in the past, but this one feels like it is going to be very different already.
Unlike her previous work, her supervisor was encouraging her to also stand in front of the camera this time. His suggestion had sounded very strange, since Claire has always been content behind the camera and had not planned on doing anything differently. Sure, she was not the shy type, her presence had always demanded attention. But to play an active role in her own series, while also directing it, sounded like too much work for her. Maybe then the general public would come to find out how weird she actually is.
But to those who know her, it is definitely not a secret.
DREAMS.
"Pilot."
INT. CLAIRE'S OFFICE — MORNING.
Claire is sitting at her desk. The camera closes in on her.
CLAIRE
(to camera)
You know that feeling when everything is strangely going well?
EXT. CAFÉ — LATER.
Claire is walking away from the counter with her coffee.
CLAIRE
(to camera)
You've got a casual relationship that suits your schedule, which is perfect, because—
CUT TO:
EXT. STREETS OF LONDON — DAY.
Claire is walking on the street. She comes across a huge billboard of AFC Richmond's newest owner, REBECCA WELTON, who will also be her new boss.
CLAIRE
(to camera)
Work is going great.
EXT. STREETS OF LONDON — CONT.
The billboard changes, showing her own face to promote her latest documentary series, which is now also available for streaming on CBC Plus.
CLAIRE
(to camera)
You even seem to be getting along with your annoying teenage sister, all things considered. The two of you haven't argued in six days, which is a record! It's weird, but you've decided not to question it, because that might jinx it.
CLAIRE
But like, my life rarely seems to be going this well. In fact, it never fucking does. This is rare.
She looks at the camera on her phone, TRACEY stares back at her. The two were FaceTiming each other.
TRACEY
You're just being paranoid.
CLAIRE
(to camera)
I'm not being paranoid.
CLAIRE
(to Tracey)
It is my first day, Trace. First days never go well.
Tracey simply eyes her friend disapprovingly, noticing the large to go cup in her hands through the screen.
TRACEY
Fucking hell, Claire. Is that another cup of coffee? You need to lay off that garbage, caffeine is like the same thing as nicotine.
CLAIRE
(to camera)
Tracey always worries about me, it is her thing. As the slightly overbearing mother figure, she often likes to point out that my caffeine intake is a bit higher than the average person. I disagree with her and she scolds me for it.
CLAIRE
(to Tracey)
It is not.
Tracey sighs, clearly annoyed by her. Claire grins.
TRACEY
They're both highly addictive, they're practically the same.
CLAIRE
(to camera)
It is not.
TRACEY
You can relax, you know. Today is not even your first day of filming. And you insisted on going there to meet the new coach. So, Claire Laghari, what you are going to do is strut into the room with confidence and charm everyone at AFC Richmond. You'll be fine and starting tomorrow, I will be there by your side.
CLAIRE
(to camera)
It won't be fine now. She jinxed me. I'm fucked.
CLAIRE
(to Tracey)
You're right. I can survive this strange day on my own.
INT. THE BUS. CONT.
Claire is sitting on the bus, on her way to her meeting at AFC Richmond. She is no longer on the phone.
CLAIRE
(to camera)
You know that strange feeling you have? It follows you around the entire fucking day. And all you can do is wait for that one moment to happen when it all finally falls into place.
CLAIRE
(to camera)
But for now, everything is going great.
CUT TO:
INT. AFC RICHMOND. OFFICES — LATER.
Claire is standing outside of Rebecca's door. She glances over at HIGGINS, who awaits the signal for them to enter.
HIGGINS
I am a huge fan of your work, Ms. Laghari. My wife and I watched your last series again recently. It was brilliant.
CLAIRE
(to camera)
Like, really great.
MUSIC CUE: "IN MÉMORIAM" BY BRUNO COULAIS.
The sound of Higgins knocking on the door is what pulls Claire away from her daydream and in reality there were no cameras following her, at least not yet. Higgins glances her way, while he holds the door open for her, waiting for her to enter. Regaining her confidence, Claire steps into the office with grace. "Ms. Welton. Hi, I am Claire Laghari. We have spoken on the phone," Claire states, holding out her hand for the new club owner of AFC Richmond to shake.
"Please, call me Rebecca. There's no need for an introduction, I know who you are. Your filmography is impressive," Rebecca genuinely answers, shaking her hand with a satisfied smile, "I assume Higgins has already told you he's a fan? It is lovely to finally meet you in person."
"The pleasure is all mine," Claire responds, who had been quite flattered by the compliments she was getting.
"You are here to sign the paperwork, I believe?" Rebecca asks to confirm, "Higgins has prepared everything for you to sign, but I did want to discuss a few things beforehand."
Claire nods, "Sure, I'd love to hear your thoughts."
"Please, take a seat. Can I get you anything to drink?"
"A glass of water would be great. Thank you!"
While Claire is sitting on the couch, Rebecca prepares tea for herself. She hands her a cup of water, which Claire takes off her hands. She studies the woman sitting in front of her with the hope of forming her own opinion of Rebecca, who has been in the news a lot as of late. AFC Richmond was not initially hers, but as the new owner Rebecca Welton had made it known that she had plans to improve the club. Apparently, hiring a new coach and a camera crew for a documentary series was her way of doing just that.
"I think we are both aware of what the tabloids have been saying about me. I can see why that would make it tempting to also address my personal life, but I want this series to be strictly about them." Rebecca glances out the window and Claire does the same, the two women looking at the players train. "People have questioned if AFC Richmond can ever be successful again. I want to show them that they can be. This documentary series will prove it."
"Good." Claire simply answers, nodding along, "I am here to tell the story of AFC Richmond. I don't think addressing your shitty ex-husband would be relevant to that story, since it's not his club to manage anymore. And I have no intention of fueling the smear campaign against you to gain viewership or fame, so I completely agree."
The two share a smile, satisfied that they were seeing eye to eye. "Good," Rebecca repeats in acknowledgement.
Rebecca hands her the forms and a pen, "The players have been informed and most of them sounded very pleased with your coming. You can meet them later after their training."
"Most of them?" Claire inquires, her eyes narrowed.
Rebecca sighs, "Some of them still need to warm up to the idea of a camera constantly following them around. I think you can imagine who I am specifically referring to."
Claire nods. With her knowledge as an old fan of AFC Richmond, she could definitely think of a certain player who wouldn't be thrilled about her presence—more specifically the presence of a camera in his face.
"Is that all?" Claire asks, while going through the handful of forms, "Because I do have something I'd like to address."
Rebecca shrugs, taking a sip of her tea, "Sure, go ahead."
"I've been told I can be quite hands-on and headstrong when it comes to my work, because I want it to be perfect. Our definitions of what we regard as such can be different." Claire explains skillfully, while also proceeding to add her signature to the multiple pages, "For me, it is a priority that this series will be entertaining and suitable for television, whereas you may have other priorities, such as the image of the team and their performance. I do think it is important that we are on the same page about our expectations, what should or shouldn't be included, et cetera. You do not have to answer this now, but this is something we can think about separately and discuss at another time."
She adds with a reassuring smile, "And as we've discussed on the phone before, we can start filming tomorrow."
"Sounds perfect. I have a feeling we'll have a great partnership." Rebecca stands up and Claire does as well, the two of them shaking hands, "Likewise."
A knock on the door gets their attention, the two women looking over to the timid man standing by the door. Higgins walks past him to enter the office, taking ahold of the contract Claire had just signed. The three watch the unfamiliar man stammer, waiting for him to get the words out until he runs off. They shrug, but happen to notice the two individuals who were still standing there.
"Hi, how y'all doing? I'm Ted Lasso, your new coach." Ted announces as the two of them enter the office, "And you must be Ms. Welton."
Claire and Coach Beard stand by and nod to acknowledge each other, while watching them introduce themselves.
"Please, call me Rebecca." She states while she shakes hands with Ted, "Ms. Welton's my father."
"If that's a joke, I love it." Ted quips, before he eyes her worriedly, "If not, I cannot wait to unpack that with you."
Ted turns to face Claire, "And you must be Ms. Laghari. You're the famous documentary maker, right? I saw you on a billboard on our way here. You're quite the celebrity."
Claire smiles eagerly as the two of them shake hands, "If anyone is famous out of the two of us, it is most definitely you. I've heard about your remarkable feat of getting your division II team all the way to their first national title. I mean, that is impressive. And I loved the celebratory video! It went viral for a reason, your dancing was very entertaining to watch. Welcome to England. You can call me Claire. I am looking forward to working with you."
"I love your energy!" Ted points out eagerly, "And I was just doing my job, but thank you. I cannot wait to work with you either, Claire. I heard we're shooting a mockumentary, like The Office? I loved that show, so this is automatically up there with the big greats of television."
Claire narrows her eyes, "Steve Carell or Ricky Gervais?"
"Oh, right. Here you have your own version. I was talking about Steve's, but I realize I'm in the minority now." Ted thinks out loud and chuckles, "That made me sound like I know Steve Carell personally, but I don't sadly."
"Yeah, I've never finished the American one, no offense. But I did enjoy watching Parks and Recreation. And I'm currently watching Abbott Elementary, which is so good."
"I enjoyed both of those, but nothing beats The Office. Now that we're working together I'll have plenty of time to convince you to give it another chance," Ted says hopefully, while Claire shrugs, chuckling at his optimism, "Sure. We'll see. I don't think you could convince me, but I'd like to see you try. You do seem pretty nice though, which is a plus."
"I think we'll get along just fine." Ted reassures her with a smile and Claire nods in return, before he continues to introduce his fellow coach, "This here is Coach Beard."
"It is so good to finally meet you both face-to-face. Higgins?" Rebecca calls out to introduce him, "This is Higgins, our current director of communications."
"Current?" Higgins inquires, seemingly unaware of the title.
"—Could you take Coach Beard and get him their IDs, housing information... You know, anything they need."
"Wi-Fi password, wet wipes."
"Humidifier. Way ahead of you, Coach."
Coach Beard and Higgins walk out of the office together. Before leaving the room, Higgins sends a thumbs up Claire's way, showing his support as her number one fan. Claire grins at him and the two men leave.
Rebecca gestures to the couch, "Please, take a seat."
"Okay," Ted answers, while his attention is on Claire, who is still left standing, "Will you join us, Claire?"
Claire eyes him with a reassuring smile, "Of course."
"Can I get you something to drink?"
"Yes, please." Ted responds, while Claire sits down next to him, "I didn't get much sleep on the plane, so anything you got, a little boost of caffeine, should do the trick. You know, mochaccino, frappuccino... Any coffee thing, as long as I can't taste a hint of coffee, is good."
"How do you take your tea?" Rebecca asks in response.
"Well, usually I take it right back to the counter, cause someone's made a horrible mistake. But... when in Rome, right?" Ted takes the cup she hands him, "Okay."
The two women expectedly watch him take a sip. "Well?"
"I figured that tea was just gonna taste like hot brown water. And you know what? I was right. It's horrible. No, thank you." Ted says quite frankly, putting the cup away.
"Welcome to England," Rebecca quips.
"Yeah. 'Get used to it, sucker.' Right?"
"English tea is known to be quite bland. Chai is the real deal," Claire chimes in, earning Ted's attention, "Really?"
Claire grins, "I can bring some for you to try if you want."
"I'll hold you to it," Ted smiles back at her.
Rebecca watches the two of them get along, smiling politely before she cuts in, "Now, would you like a tour?"
"I'd love to see Abbey Road," Ted eagerly remarks.
"She's referring to the club," Claire corrects him.
"Yeah, let's start there."
The two newcomers follow Rebecca as she gives them a tour, walking through the halls of the club. As an old fan of AFC Richmond, Claire is surely fascinated by it all, still not quite grasping the fact that she's witnessing it after all those years she spent watching the team on the telly. She did go to the stadium a few times with her dad, but never was allowed to go much further than that. A soft smile appears on her face at the thought of her dad, who would've loved to have seen this for himself. Whilst feeling grateful, she could already sense that her job at AFC Richmond would be very different from her previous work. It feels a lot more personal and a bit uncomfortable. But Claire has never turned down a challenge and she knows that she's not going to start now.
"—Yeah, some of the locals claim they still see fallen soldiers wandering around the pitch," Rebecca says once Claire has tuned back into the conversation.
"That's spooky," Ted points out.
Claire looks at him with a sudden interest, "Ooh, do you believe in ghosts, Ted?"
Ted smiles, "I do. But more importantly, I think they need to believe in themselves. You know?"
Rebecca nods, looking for a way to change the topic. Claire on the other hand seems to agree, "I weirdly get that."
"And this is a wall of our previous owners," Rebecca calls out, steering the two of them to look at the pictures on the wall. Ted voices his amusement at the picture of Rupert—Rebecca's ex-husband, while not aware of their relation, "And now look at this fella up here. How 'bout the girls and the champagne and everything? He looks like a good time."
Rebecca sighs, "That's my ex-husband."
"Well, good times aren't always a good time, I've found." Ted shoots a concerned look Rebecca's way, "You know, I heard about all that. How you holding up?"
"Yeah, hasn't been the easiest year."
"If there's anything I—we can do for you, just say the word, Rebecca. You deserve much better than that imbecile anyway," Claire expresses sincerely, while Rebecca nods her head in agreement to reassure her that she appreciates it.
Their moment of vulnerability only lasts a second when Rebecca eyes Ted to steer the conversation according to her own agenda, "So, we'll need you to speak to the press."
Ted smiles politely, nodding along to her suggestion while she steered them towards a door, "Oh, yeah. No, after a couple nights of good sleep, I'll be happy to do so."
Rebecca shoots an apologetic look his way, "I'm so sorry. I thought you knew. They're ready for you now."
"—They're what?"
Rebecca opens the door to the conference room and allows the two guests to enter. While Ted is quickly steered towards the stage, where Higgins introduces him, Claire is directed towards the back of the room, where Coach Beard is also standing. The entire room is filled with reporters, most of whom Claire is very familiar with. Almost immediately she takes out her phone, causing Coach Beard to look up at her.
"What are you doing?" He glances at her worriedly.
Claire shakes her head to reassure him, while her eyes were still focused on her phone, "Oh, I'm filming this just in case. It could be useful for the documentary series. You know, as an introduction. Don't worry, Coach. It will be fine."
Watching Ted be seated in the center of the room while many cameras swarmed around him and the phones of the reporters were being placed at the front of the room, Claire could already tell that there was no possible way that this press conference was going to go well.
The occurrence in itself was already a recipe for disaster—Ted seems to be a sweetheart, but he's still an American coach for a English football team with no experience—and no matter what Ted is going to say, his words will be spun out of control by the media.
"On a scale of one to ten, how big of a mess is this going to be?" Coach Beard asks her, worriedly glancing over at her.
"Like that character from Stranger Things." Claire candidly answers, while she began to film the occurrence.
Claire cringes at the sight of Ted spitting out the fizzy water he was given, feeling a bit more sympathetic towards him. But she still zoomed in on his face to capture him well, knowing that this should definitely be included in the series.
She's not even surprised when all of the reporters raise their hands when asked if anyone had any questions or when Ted decides to go ahead and address the elephant in the room—his inexperience as a football coach. The conference goes from bad to worse when Ted makes it very clear that he has no knowledge about football, causing everyone to laugh at him and not with him.
"Alright, one final question," Higgins calls out, resulting to all of the reporters raising their hands in the hopes of getting the chance to ask the American coach a question.
"How about the fellow right there in the second row," Ted points towards Trent Crimm, which made Claire gasp on the spot, "R.I.P. Ted. It has been nice knowing you."
Coach Beard eyes her, "It's only been a half hour."
"Well, it was a nice half hour," Claire voices sadly, "Poor Ted does not deserve to go out like that so soon. I thought we were honestly going to become fast friends. But I guess this is goodbye. Keep your head up, bro." Claire feigns to dramatically sniffle, noticing Coach Beard watch her from the corner of her eye, "This will be brutal, I can't look."
At the same time, she angles the camera to capture Trent, zooming in on the cut-throat reporter. Trent gets up and puts away his glasses, getting a compliment for them from Ted in return, before he swiftly turns cold, "Trent Crimm, The Independent. I just wanna make sure I have this right. You're an American who's never set foot in England, whose athletic success has only come at the amateur level—a second-tier one at that—and is now being charged with the leadership of a Premier League football club, despite clearly possessing very little knowledge of the game."
Ted simply grins, "You got a question in there, Trent?"
"Yeah. Is this a fucking joke?" Trent asks, causing the entire room except Claire and Coach Beard to burst into laughter.
Chaos ensues afterwards as every journalist in the room fires questions at Ted, all of them shouting at the same time as they quiz him on his knowledge of football. It doesn't stop until the sound of Coach Lasso spitting all over their phones gets their attention, making everyone voice their disgust, until Rebecca finally decides to save the day by coming to his defense. Claire stops filming, since it is no longer needed and already feels embarrassed on his behalf.
It doesn't take long for Rebecca and Ted to walk out the room, resulting to Claire, Higgins and Coach Beard doing the same. Ted immediately apologizes for the occurrence, while Rebecca reassures him it's no big deal. Ted says he'll go to see the team and Rebecca and Higgins walk off, while Claire is left with the two coaches, inspecting Ted as they still stood in the halls, "You seem very vivacious."
Ted smiles her way, "Well, I hope that's a good thing."
"Oh yeah, it is weirdly refreshing." Claire nods to reassure him, "It's nice to be around someone who isn't a raging pessimist. After witnessing that disaster I would've rather put the whole conference room on fire than face the embarrassment, but somehow you did it. I respect that."
"That became morbid real fast," Ted says, eyeing her somewhat with concern before he added, "But thank you."
"Well, I have to go to make a quick call, but I'll join you later to meet the team, okay?" Claire takes her phone out of her pocket, waiting for them to nod until she takes that as confirmation to run off to the bathroom, entering one of the stalls to speed dial the first person who comes to mind.
"Oh my God, I've been trying to reach you all day. Did you see that press conference? This makes for such good television, Claire—I'm telling you, this will get us another BAFTA. Hell, we might even break into the American industry and swoop all of the fucking award shows," Tracey rambles as soon as she picks up the phone, "That conference was brutal. I hope the poor man will get some media training. It's like we were watching him get eaten alive."
Claire looks around to make sure no one is there, "Yes, I saw the conference. In fact, I was fucking there. I feel bad for the man and yet I filmed the entire thing on my phone."
"Claire!" Tracey scolds her, despite knowing that having the footage would be an advantage, "The poor man is already having bad day, let's not make it any worse by using that video. You should delete that shit right now."
"But I never even said I was going to use it, Trace!" Claire walks out of the stall and avoids looking into the camera, being able to tell that Tracey is looking at her pointedly, since she knows her well enough to know that was a lie.
Eventually, Claire gives in, "Ugh, Fine! I'll delete it."
Tracey smirks, "And also from your recently deleted."
"Fuck you."
"By the way, I've told you, before the day even started that I felt like that this was going to be a shitty day. And you told me that it'll be fine, that I could do this on my own. You've jinxed this, do you realize that?" Claire eyes Tracey with raised eyebrows this time, knowing that she was right.
Tracey nods, "Yeah, I might've spoken too soon."
The two stay silent for a moment while Claire tries to regain some composure, since she wants nothing more than this day to end. She takes a deep breath and looks into the bathroom mirror, noticing how tired she looks. Being present in that familiar building without him took more energy out of her than she had imagined. She recalls how she used to wish she could see more than just the stadium whenever she was there with her dad, running into the bathroom during the matches in the hopes of bumping into someone who would pity her and let her meet the players.
But that had never happened and just like back then Claire had to face the facts—that dreams don't always come true.
She wishes he was here with her right now, that he could see this for himself. She wanted to make him proud.
"You know he would be proud of you, right?" Tracey cuts in, also knowing her well enough to know what was going through her head, "He has always been proud of you. He loved you. And I believe he's seeing this moment right now and smiling down on you. Just take a deep breath."
Claire complies, taking a deep breath as she looks into the camera to see Tracey, "Good. You're doing well, Claire. Hey, do you want me to come get you? Because I will if you need me to. Just say the word and I'll rush to you—"
Claire chuckles at that, thankful to her for cheering her up, "No, I still need to meet the team. I'll be fine."
Tracey nods, smiling softly at her, "Okay. I'll pick you up when you're done. And I'm not taking no for an answer."
Claire takes one more deep breath, "Okay. I love you."
Tracey grins, "I love you too. You've got this."
Claire shrugs, "I'm not actually so sure that I've got this. I'm fucking terrified. But I'm going to try. For appa."
⋆ y'all, i promise i can be funny, pls give me a chance 😭😭😭 I'M A STARRRR. (i haven't even seen this movie tbh, i know its fake of me but at least i'm telling you the truth here 😭.) so yeah, i kinda hate this chapter...
but this is not the worst thing i've ever written so we're just going to roll with it. this chapter was anything but funny so to make up for it i put all of my jokes (which are probably not going to be funny either) in the next chapter. but consider this an introduction, this needed to be included to finally get the plot started. the fun stuff will come soon!
⋆ anyway, i wanted to let y'all know upfront that like most sitcom / comedy show characters my girl claire will not exactly be a saint. she will be a bit flawed and that's okay! but yeah, she does have good intentions so we'll hopefully see her develop over the course of this story! i don't want to give too much away (mostly because i'm winging most of this story and have nothing really set in stone yet), but i do think she is a bit similar to jamie and rebecca in that sense.
⋆ i hope you've enjoyed this chapter! as you can see, i wanted to try something different with this story. so yeah, this fic might be a bit weird and imaginative, but it was intended to be that way. i hope you do like it, though! for the sake of this chapter we're just gonna pretend that abbott elementary started airing in 2020, okay? (i'm obsessed btw 😭 i need some fanfics... i would've made one myself but i don't want to start something else that i won't finish)
⋆ this fic will be updated from time to time, but i'll hopefully try to update again soon! 💗