When there's nothing new happening in our lives, we tend to start liking the nothingness of it all. Sumedh was no different.
Usually a chaotic guy, he found a new friend called silence. The days started to look the same; sitting on the window pane, staring at that sky, mulling the same thoughts over and over, and above everything else, the silence that surrounded it all. Life became terribly monotonous, yet, he wasn't tired of that boredom at all.
"Knock...Knock..." Sumedh's eyes instantly darted towards the door to see who was trying to break his reverie. Surprisingly, the door was already opened. It was then he noticed his sister standing right by his side.
"Knock...Knock...," she said once again, tapping on his leg.
"The door's closed," he replied just as he had done as a child a number of times.
"Don't worry," she said flinging his leg aside and claiming the other half of the window pane, "I know how to open it."
That's how it used to happen till his sister was living with them. Sumedh was always reluctant to share his space. There was a certain sense of possessiveness around everything he did. However, Avneet just wasn't someone who would stop watching a boundary. She would utter a quick 'Knock...Knock...' and just claim whatever she wished. After all, being the elder of the siblings always had its perks. Not that the younger one was troubled by it though. Sumedh knew he had the sweetest sister he could ever get. Both chuckled remembering the sweet memory of their childhood.
"When did you arrive?" there was a newfound excitement in his voice.
"Early morning," she said watching the sun change its colour outside the window.
"Why didn't mom or dad tell me you're coming?"
"Mom says she did," Avneet nodded at the questioning glance of her brother, "Apparently you were so preoccupied in your thoughts that you just shrugged it off."
His silence told everything.
Avneet leaned towards him to ruffle his hair, "What's wrong kiddo?"
Sumedh couldn't even explain how good it felt to have someone ruffle his hair while calling him a kiddo. A gesture which made him forget all the teenage worries and be a little kid once again. Oh, how much he missed his big sister all these days.
"Nothing," he shrugged, making a desperate effort to effort to hide his messed up life.
Avneet quietly leaned back to rest against the window pane, folded her hands, and stared at him. Those eyes could see right through him. For the first time in a couple of weeks, silence was making Sumedh uncomfortable. Finally, he gave up.
As he finished narrating the events of the recent past, he could see a disappointed look on his sister's face.
"You haven't changed a bit," once again leaning in to ruffle his hair, "Still the restless little brother that I left behind."
"Me, and restless?" he looked surprised at being called that.
"Don't look so surprised. You've always been restless Sumedh. I don't know if you remember it or not, but even as a child you were never satisfied with what you had. You quickly grew tired of your toys and demanded a new one. And when you didn't get them right away, you'd cry, bicker, and do all sorts of drama; just like you're doing now."
He burst out into a laugh.
"How does my current situation relate to me asking for toys?"
"It perfectly does. As I see it, your relationship with Mallika is no different from that. Friendship is the toy you've been playing with for a while now, a toy you've grown tired of. And so, you desire something else, something better than friendship."
"Oh...," the odd resemblance dragged him into the world of thoughts once again. "It's just my nature then I guess," he said after a brief silence, "I don't think I can change that in a day."
"Ofcourse you can't. No one can." Avneet leaned in once again to turn his head towards her. "But I do see a small change in my little brother that he should be really proud of."
His eyes widened asking the obvious.
"Even after all that has gone by, even after weeks of silence, you haven't given up on Mallika. For the first time you don't look keen to throw away a broken toy. Instead, you're searching for ways to mend it. You know what that means, right?"
Sumedh knew where the wind was blowing. Thought he didn't expect the conversation to turn to that, it was a familiar territory.
Sensing no reply from him, Avneet continued, "You're in love with her kiddo!"
It was the exact answer that Sumedh expected. Yes, he was in love with Mallika. He knew that. Probably the whole world around him knew that. Yet, no one understood the complications that came with it.
"Maybe I am," he knew perfectly well that lying to his sister was almost impossible, "But I don't think it matters much. There's no future to that feeling."
"Why not?" it was Avneet's turn to sound surprised. Her brother was ready to give up that easily? This wasn't the change she wanted to see in him.
"As you said, I'm restless. Exactly like sky," he said pointing outside the window, "My mood changes every other moment. And Mallika, she's like the Earth, not willing to change at all. We just don't fit together."
"And yet she has been your best friend since the last four years, has she not?"
Sumedh nodded.
"Trust me Sumedh; no one understands the moods of sky better than that Earth. If she knows how to bear your heat, then she also knows how to allow your rains to seep in."
"But what's the use of understanding each other when we're not destined to meet at all?" There was a frustration in his voice now. "The horizon may try all it wants, but in the end, all it does is create an illusion of us being together. Relationships don't survive on just an illusion."
I know, Avneet wanted to shout out loud, but it wasn't the time to reveal her bruises. She had to restore her brother's belief first.
"Maybe they do, maybe they don't. Who are you to decide that?" she asked, her voice a pitch high, "Most of the doors in life are shut only by our presumptions. If we already believe that they will be locked without even giving them a try, then how would we know if they were always open?"
Sumedh tried to process what she just said, but his mind was just not in the frame.
"What does that mean?" he asked giving up.
"Have you ever expressed your love to Mallika?" Avneet's voice calmed down suddenly.
Sumedh gestured a no, "Atleast not out rightly."
"Then what makes you believe that she doesn't feel the same for you too?"
He didn't have any answer to that. Since the farewell party, all he did was pick up the moments they shared, join some random dots, and just assume that Mallika had no intentions of moving beyond friendship. Upon looking back though, he always came around those moments which he couldn't even think of sharing with his other friends. He and Mallika were already beyond the normal boundaries of friendship. The sudden realization hit him hard.
While it made him tad bit happy, there was always a question of Mallika's silence.
"Why hasn't she tried to contact me since these couple of weeks then?" he asked expecting Avneet to present a girl's point of view on it.
And she didn't disappoint.
"Probably for the same reason as you haven't."
Sumedh didn't know what to say. All his thoughts had been robbed off their perceptions in a snap. And what remained after that gave him a perfect idea of what he needed to do.
He hurried towards, picked up his mobile, and was about to call when Avneet stopped him.
"Don't just call little brother, go and meet her. After all, some things can't be said over words."
Without wasting any more time to think, Sumedh picked up his car keys and rushed to meet his best friend.
***
"Some illusions are worth turning into a reality."
Most of the times, we know what we need to do. Yet, we need someone else to tell it to us.
It's strange, but that's how it is. So, now that Sumedh has finally realized his mistake, will he be able to make it right?
Or is it too late?
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-Presenting Avneet kaur as Avneet Mudgalkar-
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So, a long chappy and 2 parts in a day ;)
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