I had successfully gone a full week avoiding Quinn. Having completely finished classes and being on study leave for exams helped a lot. The only time I had to leave the house was to have my weekly session with Lorna. I knew I couldn't keep going like this forever though. And Quinn had made it too easy, he wasn't in and out of his house like usual. It was almost like he was avoiding me too. But that would be too good to be true. Especially because he was now stood on my doorstep, waiting for me to greet him.
"Are you going to let me in?"
"That depends why you're here."
"I told you, I thought we could spend the day together. Seems like you haven't left the house in a while."
"What makes you think that wasn't intentional?"
"Oh, I can bet it was. But that's boring," he stated casually, sauntering passed me into the house. "So where do you want to hang out? Your room-"
"No. Absolutely not."
There was no way I was taking Quinn into my single bedroom with only one desk chair to sit on. I don't think I can handle being in any sort of close proximity to him after leavers night. I wasn't sure what his next move would be. Whether he'd even acknowledge it or not. I prayed he wouldn't.
Sure, I was drunk. But I kissed Quinn. And I enjoyed it. It was like someone had took over my body for a night. Besides it wasn't just for a night. I wasn't quite sure when but something in our relationship had shifted. The way I viewed him had changed – and he wasn't half bad. It was getting harder to ignore my skin shuddering whenever he was near and the slight pang of jealousy when other girls spoke about him, like Cliodhan.
"I've been in your room before."
"Yeah, when we were twelve maybe. Not now."
"Why, what's changed?" He took a step closer.
"You're even more unbearable now," I kept my cool in the only way I knew how, speaking to him how we used to. "If you're going to insist on ruining my day, you can do it in the living room." He followed behind me, a confused look on his face, "fine."
We sat in silence for what felt like eternity but in reality, was only a few minutes. Quinn had settled on the other sofa and called Charlie up to sit on his lap. "So, what do you want to do?"
"This was your plan, you tell me."
"Can we just have fun for a day?"
"Fun?"
"Yeah, fun. Ever heard of it?"
"Not for about a year or so, funny enough" I scoffed, obviously alluding to the I haven't fully enjoyed myself since mum got really ill again.
Quinn frowned at my attempt to make a joke of the situation. "Truth or truth?" he asked.
"Excuse me?"
"It's a game."
"Don't you mean truth or dare?"
"No, this is my version of the game. You don't get the option of a dare. Either way you answer my question, I get to ask you something intrusive about yourself and you can't do anything about it."
"I can just not answer."
"That defeats the purpose. It's meant to be fun remember."
"Fine. Truth, I guess."
"Do you want another option?"
"Are you serious?"
"I know it's a tough question. I'm just trying to help you out."
"Fine. How thoughtful of you."
"Okay so, truth or truth or truth?"
"This is so dumb."
"I'm waiting for your answer?"
"The first truth."
"So, the third didn't tempt you?"
"No, now hurry up and ask the question."
"When's the last time you had a perfect day? A day where you were completely happy?"
I was quiet for at least a minute while I pondered the question. I hadn't expected it to be anything like this. Truths were never meant to be nice. "Probably one of the last times my family were all together, before we knew the cancer was terminal. Last spring."
"Is there a specific day?"
"Yes."
"Tell me about it."
"We took a picnic down to the lough. Me, Mum, Dad, Connor, and Granny. Even Hannah and Olivia joined us in the evening actually. The sun was out, and we were running around playing with Charlie for most of the day. It's one of the last times I remember everyone being in good spirits. A bird actually pooed on my head and it didn't even hurt my good mood," I laughed, replaying the memory in my head.
"Let's go," Quinn was standing now, snapping me out of the trance I was in, holding his hand out for me.
"What? Where?"
"A picnic sounds fun."
"Oh Quinn, I don't-"
"Just come," he sighed. "No birds will poo on you this time."
"You can't promise that."
"No, but I can give you the type of day where it won't hurt your good mood."
Where had this Quinn been hiding? While I was weary of his suggestion. It was one of the most thoughtful things anyone had ever done for me, whether he intended it that way or not. "Can we bring Charlie?"
"Wouldn't leave without him," he flashed me another one of his grins. The second time in just over a week. What was happening to us?
Quinn insisted on driving because it was a nice day, and his car had a sunroof while mine didn't. I tried to put up a fight saying he should let me show off my new driving skills, but he didn't budge. I decided being a passenger wouldn't be so bad anyway, considering Charlie would probably come back filthy from running around. We went to the shop and got some snacks for our picnic before heading to the lough and parking up.
"So, what spot looks like the type you'd sit at on a perfect day?" Quinn mused, looking around all the picnic tables.
"None," I laughed, "on a perfect day you'd sit on the beach! That's why we brought a blanket."
"Oh, obviously," he rolled his eyes before changing direction and turning towards our small strand of beach.
I had brought a book with me to read, not expecting to have much conversation with Quinn. There was a sort of awkwardness in the air. One that wouldn't be there on a perfect day. So, I took out my book and started reading as Quinn tried to play fetch with a very uninterested Charlie. As our family dog got older, he couldn't care less about playing and instead he would just wander around before falling asleep. Luckily this meant we could count on him staying away from the water.
It wasn't long before Quinn got bored of his antics and returned to sit on the blanket, beside me. I finished off my chapter before deciding to play him at his own game.
"Truth or truth?"
He raised an eyebrow, "that's a tough question. Didn't expect it from you."
"I can be quite cruel," I mocked.
"Truth," he said defiantly.
"When's the last time you had a perfect day?"
"Nope. You can't ask the same question I asked you."
"Fine. What about a perfect moment?"
"That's the same thing."
"No, it's not. A perfect moment is different. You can pick one where the rest of your day was awful is you have to."
He hesitated before answering, "the start of last summer, I was coming home from training and your mum was in your front garden. Gardening, as usual. She invited me to join her."
"You gardened with my mum?"
"More than once. That day with you and Hannah wasn't the first time I've cut your grass you know."
"I didn't know that."
"Well, yeah. We did some gardening and then when my mum came home from work, the 3 of us had dinner together. I think you were out with your friends and your dad was working lates or something. Your mum and my mum just had such a great friendship. They radiated happiness when they were together."
"They were best friends."
"They were. I like to think your mum became one of my best friends too you know."
"Really?"
"Definitely. She had such a comforting nature to her. I told her things I wouldn't tell anyone else. The only downfall in our friendship was how much she'd talk about you," he nudged me, jokingly.
I smiled at the thought of her talking about me. "Did she really talk about me that much?"
"Oh, all the time. She talked about you in such a way even I started to think maybe I was missing out, not being your friend," he laughed again.
"Yeah, like you'd ever think that" I rolled my eyes. Talking about my mum like this felt nice. I had always been too afraid to bring her up in conversation to anyone, scared of it making them uncomfortable. But Quinn talked about her like it was normal. Like I could remember her in a happy light. "What made that moment so perfect?"
"It was the last time I spent with her before knowing she was sick."
That timing didn't add up for me. The Hale family only found out when it got really bad. Quinn couldn't have known at the start of the summer. "You knew before Angela?"
"The next time I saw your mum, I called in to leave off some raffle tickets she'd bought from the club. I could tell something was up with her. We were in the middle of talking about Gaelic when she passed out. Once she woke up, she told me the truth. I had no idea how serious it would turn out to be though."
"You didn't tell your parents?"
"No. She asked me not to. That moment I was talking about – it's the last time I remember seeing her as the happy and carefree woman she was, without the fear of her being sick hanging over me."
"I didn't- Oh my God Charlie!" I shrieked.
Charlie was splashing around in the water – getting himself drenched in the process. He never went in the water. Ever. I didn't even think he could swim.
"Shit! He has to go back in my car!" Quinn stood up, grabbing my hand, and pulling me behind him as he ran towards the water.
"Charlie! Come here!" I tried to get my dogs attention, as he ignored me and continued to swim further out. "You're going to have to get him Quinn!"
"Are you kidding me?"
"No! He could drown!"
"He's not going to drown in that water Ivy."
"Get in!" I demanded.
Quinn muttered a few choice swear words as he entered the water, fully clothed. "This is freezing!" he complained.
"I will never forgive you if my dog drowns!" I taunted him.
"Seriously he's not even that far out!"
It was only a matter of seconds before he had made it to Charlie and scooped him up in his arms. Watching them walk back to me, I realised how dramatic my reaction was. Making Quinn get in really wasn't necessary. And we'd now have two drowned rats in the car. Charlie started shaking himself, still in Quinn's arms as I burst out laughing.
"I'm glad you find this funny," he shook his head as he walked past me.
"One perfect day!" I smiled behind him.