"Wow!" I wowed seeing my place became scenic and beautiful than I expected. "Ang ganda, bagay talaga sa bahay ko!" I exclaimed, looking at the canvases around my wall.
Since Jaxxon gave the paintings to me, I decided to place the canvases on the surroundings. Ang canvas na ginawa niya kanina ay nasa aking silid, doon ko naisipan na ilagay. Hindi napapawi ang ngiti sa aking labi habang isa-isang tinatapunan ng tingin ang mga nakasabit na mga canvas sa dingding. Pagkapasok ng mga bisita ay siguradong iyon ang unang kukuha sa atensyon nila. Nakakamangha lang, hindi ko lubos naisip na may ganitong talento si Jaxxon. Ang hirap talagang nakawin ang mga talentong mayroon siya, eh.
The canvas he made earlier took three hours until it done. Katulad sa mga naunang canvases ay nilagyan niya rin iyon ng kaniyang buong pangalan at signatura. Furthermore, I noticed that he's not considering his middle initial as part of his name. Wala talaga siyang middle initial na nilalagay sa mga larawan kaya hanggang ngayon ay hindi ko pa rin alam kung ano ang gitnang letra ng pangalan niya pero hindi bale na...
"Thank you for appreciating those canvases I made," he broke the atmosphere between us.
"No, thank your for making them for me," I thanked him. "Sino ba'ng hindi mag-a-appreciate sa mga gawa mo? Nakakamangha at napakaganda, feeling ko nga ay artist talaga ang gumawa ng mga iyon, eh. Kung hindi mo lang ako ipininta kanina, baka hindi mapatunayan na ikaw gumawa niyon," I even joked at him. "Kuhang-kuha talaga ang bawat anggulo at pati ang kulay.. ilang kulay lang ng pinta ang nakita ko kanina, eh. You're good at mixing colors, the contrast and the vignette on one of your canvases... Paano mo nagawa iyon? Ang galing mo!"
"I was ten years old when my grandmother taught me how to paint," he shared out of nowhere. "She helped me with mixing colors and she taught me to study every parts of the picture before painting it. My grandma was once a painter. Tinuruan niya lang ako magpinta para kahit papaano ay may alam din ako sa mga ganito pero sinabi niya naman sa akin na kung ano raw ang pangarap ko, iyon ang ipagpatuloy ko."
"That's good," I commented, nodding my head. "Follow what's on your heart, Jaxxon."
He chuckled. "Yeah, that's why I follow you everywhere you go."
Namula ako dahil sa narinig mula sa kaniya pero mabilis ko ring kinalabit ang sarili ko para hindi mapahiya sa kaniya. Good thing that my day with him went well. Hindi naman ako nakaramdam ng pagkabagot dahil naaliw ako sa kaniya. Nanood na lang ako ng Netlix nang sinabi niyang tatapusin niya muna ang pag-aayos ng kaniyang kagamitan dahil may iilan pa siyang mga gamit na hindi niya pa nailalagay sa kung saang parte ng silid. Hinayaan ko na lang siya dahil ayaw niya namang magpatulong sa akin.
The next day, Jaxxon have to go to his work early. Even though he don't have much time, he prepared me a breakfast and the leftover foods are for lunch. Sinabi ko naman sa kaniya na okay lang dahil sanay naman ako na hindi nagbre-breakfast at nagla-lunch pero nagpupumilit siya kaya pinagbigyan ko na lang. He even told me that he'll try to get back here as early as possible so he can cook our dinner. I answered him, telling him that he should take his time. Hindi ko naman talaga siya pinipilit na ipagluto ako, eh, kahit prutas lang ang kainin ko buong araw ay ayos lang sa akin.
I don't really usually eating rice. Diet kasi ako dapat, pero minsan ay hindi talaga maiwasan na maghanap ako ng makakain. I am going to restaurants, resto, or any kind of cafeteria if I feel that I am starving to death. Kahit nga ano mang pilit na kain ko ay hindi talaga ako tumataba, marami nga siguro akong bulate sa tiyan, eh.
Aside from eating, I have limitations in everything. Is it right to let them control me like this? Minsan talaga ay sumosobra na ang pagbabawal nila sa akin. Naabot ko nga ang parangap kong maging modelo pero.. tama ba ito? Hindi naman kasi habangbuhay ay ganito, hindi ba? Minsan ay napapaisip na talaga ako, aanhin ko ang pangarap kong naabot kung wala naman akong kalayaan, hindi ba?
I planned that once I finish all my contracts, I will resign as the model of my industry. Not because I'll resign, I am giving up my passion. I will continue modeling but on my own products. Iyan ang plano ko kapag matapos ko na ang mga kontrata ko. Kailangan ko pang magtiis ng ilang taon bago magsimula ng bagong buhay. Sa ngayon, kailangan ko munang magtiis sa buhay kong kontrolado.
"Damn," I cussed in boredom and rested my back on the backrest of my mod cushion. "Ang boring naman..."
I am now alone at my home. Hindi puwedeng lumabas at ayaw ko ring magbukas ng social media accounts ko. I'm pretty sure that it would ruin my day. Years ago, when I am not that famous, I was really addicted to social media. Wala naman akong magagawa ngayon kaya naisipan kong pasukin ang silid kung nasaan naroroon ang mga gamit ni Jaxxon.
Hindi ako pakialamerang klase ng tao pero gusto ko lang kasi makita kung ano pa 'yong ibang gamit ni Jaxxon na puwedeng arborin. Masaya talaga ako kasi libre lang para sa akin iyong sketchpad niya at pati na rin ang paintings. I saw yesterday, happiness glistened in his eyes when he saw me displaying on the wall the canvases he made. Of course, everything he made are highly appreciated. I was really thankful that he gave it for free, he gave it without asking anything.
I did what my plan, I entered his room. Halos lumuwa ang aking mga mata dahil sa linis ng paligid. Ang mga kahon ay nakatupi na at pinagtangkas sa isa't isa nang mamataan ko iyon. Hindi ko alam kung ano ang mahikang ginamit niya kung bakit ganoon niya kabilis nalinisan ang silid at naayos ang kaniyang mga gamit.
His things are perfectly placed in every corner of the room. Kapansin-pansin din ang kulay puting kurtina sa bintana, mukhang pinalitan niya yata. My curtain on that window is violet, not white. Mukhang kulay puti yata ang paborito niyang kulay, napansin ko kasi na halos lahat yata ng gamit niya ay kulay puti, kahit ang mga damit na suot niya palagi ay kulay puti pa rin. He looked so clean, and white t-shirts are really suited for him. Hindi naman pala siya nagkamali sa paboritong kulay niya, kung kulay puti nga ba talaga ang paboritong kulay niya.
Sinuyod ko ang kabuuhan hanggang sa gumawi ako sa kama. Umupo ako roon ngunit kaagad ding napatayo nang may naupuan yata ako. I immediately get the blanket from the bed and hung it on my shoulder. My mouth formed into a circle when I saw what beneath the blanket. There are a lot of pictures of mine wearing bikinis.
Namula ako sa biglang pumasok sa isipan ko. Isa-isa kong kinuha ang mga larawan at sa bawat isa rito'y naka-bikini lamang ako. Palihim na pinagnanasaan ba ako ni Jaxxon? Pinahiran ko ang pawis sa aking noo gamit ang aking braso. I don't know why the fuck am I sweating like this! I should be used to this because almost everyone are drooling on my sexy pictures on social media. Pero bakit parang big deal ito ngayon?
I bit my lower lip while staring at my photo. Should I talk to him about this? Do I have to bring this up to him? Like.. "Jaxx, pinagnanasaan mo ba ako?" The fuck, why it sounded so mean? What about.. "Jaxx, you love me wearing bikinis?" Oh, damnit! Ba't ako ang nahihiya ngayon? Shit! He should not put these pictures of mine under his blanket! Dapat itinago niya na lang ito para hindi ko na lang malaman na may ganito pala akong mga larawan sa kaniya. Bakit kasi nasa kama niya pa ang mga ito?
Damn, I imagine him jacking off while staring at my pictures! What the fuck, Zani? Ano ba'ng pumasok sa isipan mo? Kailan ka pa naging bastos? Kailan ka pa nag-iisip ng mga ganitong kabastusan? Oh goodness, parang wala na tuloy akong maihaharap na mukha sa kaniya kahit na hindi niya pa naman alam na nakita ko na ang aking mga larawan dito sa kaniyang silid.
It took me hours to get over about it. After that, I returned the pictures from it previous place. Additionally, I placed back the blanket on the bed before heading to the unfamiliar table. It was obviously his table, it's under the window. Mas lalo pa 'kong lumapit para makita kung ano ang mga nakalapag doon.
It's a DSLR camera and under it are papers. Hindi ko maintindihan ang mga nakasulat sa mga papel kaya hindi ko na lang binasa pa. I picked up the DSLR instead and opened it. Surely, there are some pictures inside here. Binuksan ko at tiningnan kung ano ang mga larawan na nasa memory card dito. Halos umabot pang kalahati sa oras kong sinisilip ang nasa loob at napagtanto na halos ako lahat ang nasa larawan. There's a picture of mine, laughing with my manager, there are also some epic pictures, and stolen photos. I have a lot of pictures and I can't describe the others. Hindi ko alam na kinukuhanan niya pala ako ng larawan.
Ang galing niya ring kumuha ng anggulo at saktong posisyon. The only thing I can say, he's a talented person. Kahit sa pagkuha ng litrato ay magaling din siya. The angles, the views, the closer of the photo. Something came up in my mind while staring at the picture of mine.
If I resign for being a model of my industry and start modeling of my own cosmetics, products, or whatsoever. Siguro, si Jaxxon ang kukuhanin kong photographer ko. Staring at the photos he'd taken, it tugged my heart. He appreciated my simple beauty. Kahit wala akong makeup, kahit maputla man, o kahit walang kaayos-ayos sa sarili ay kinuhanan niya pa rin ako ng litrato.
Moreover, there's a picture of mine, yawning, just woke up obviously. In this picture, I remembered that I went out from my condominium to buy some cereals. This was taken years ago. Matagal na ito at noong may condominium pa lang ako nito. Ilang beses na kasi akong papalit-palit ng tinitirhan, eh.
Matapos kong tingnan ang lahat ng litrato sa camera ay gumawi naman ako sa lumang tokador ko na rito ko lang nilagay kasi hindi ko na magamit-gamit. Binuksan ko ang kabinet at ang bumungad sa akin ay ang mga damit, kulay puti ang lahat ng pang-itaas na damit at mayroon pang pares na shorts, mayroon ding slacks. Kinuha ko naman ang isang puting damit na walang pares, naka-hanger ito.
I took it off from the hanger and tried to wear it if it looks good in me. Nang masuot ko ang damit ay halos naging duster na ito. It was like a dress that's above my knees. Mabilis ko ring hinubad ang damit pero hindi nakalagpas sa aking ilong ang pabango. I smelled the familiar fragrance of Jaxxon. Sa sobrang bango ng damit ay halos yakapin ko pa ito pero kaagad kong kinalabit ang sarili ko.
I returned the shirt to its place and closed the closet immediately. Matapos niyon ay lumabas na lang ako mula sa silid. Since I am bored, I decided to wash my clothes. I have no washing machine for clothes. Nagpapa-laundry kasi ako kaya ngayon ay naisipan kong maglaba na lang dahil wala rin naman akong gagawin.
I washed my clothes using my hands, nag-hand wash lang ako dahil wala naman akong choice. Kaunti lang ang nilabhan kong damit, iyong mga importante lang. Matapos kong malabhan ang aking mga damit ay nakaramdam ako ng pamamanhid ng aking mga paa at pananakit ng balakang, pati ng likod. Gosh, ganito pala ang pakiramdam kapag hand wash lang? Kaunti pa lang ang nalabhan ko pero halos lahat ng pananakit sa katawan ay iniinda ko na ngayon. Even though I am enduring that kind of pain, I even managed to go to the backyard. I swear, I'll never wash my clothes again through hand washing! I'll do any household chores, but not this one! Fuck! My back!
Kasalukuyan na akong nagsasampay ng damit sa likod ng bahay nang bigla na lang bumuhos ang malakas na ulan. I cussed inside my head because of irritation. Ngayon nga lang ako nakapaglaba, tapos umulan pa? Kapag minamalas nga naman, eh. Ang init naman kanina, bakit naman umulan ngayon?
Marami na ang nasampay ko kaya imbes na ligpitin ang mga iyon ay hinayaan ko na lang. I am soaking wet right now and I can feel the coldness on the surroundings. Tutal basa naman ang mga damit na nilabhan ko, pinabayaan ko na lang muna kasi nangangatog na ang tuhod ko dahil sa lamig. I ran back inside my house and directly went to the bathroom to get a towel.
I dried up and covered my body using the towel since my bathrobe is not here. Even though my knees are shaking, I managed to go to my room and get some clothes to wear. I get a cottony jacket and a pants. Iyon ang sinuot ko dahil sa sobrang ginaw, napakalakas ng ulan kaya ang bilis kong mabasa.
While hugging myself, I headed to my bed and laid down there. I was still shaking a bit so I decided to wear socks. I took it out from my bedside table's drawer. Naglukbong din ako ng kumot dahil sa kaginawan. May bagyo ba?
I was coughing while hugging myself under the blanket. The air-con was off and either the electric fan. Feels like I am getting sick now. Kahit kaunting ambon lang ay sinisipon na ako at ngayong nabuhusan ako ng malakas na ulan, paniguradong lalagnatin ako nito. I am not really healthy. Iyong pakiramdam na payat ka na nga, masakitin ka pa. Iyong iba, kahit mapayat ay nagawa pang maligo sa ulan. It was so sad to admit that.. I am really an unhealthy person. Naiingit nga ako sa iba, eh, dahil ang lusog nila at hindi pa masakitin.
Eventually, I closed my eyes as a tear escaped from there. I wanna cry now. Sa tuwing nilalagnat kasi ako ay ako lang ang nag-aalaga sa sarili ko at kahit na nilalagnat minsan ay nagtratrabaho pa rin ako kasi wala naman akong pagpipilian. Sometimes, I am scared of getting sick because I know that no one's there to take care of me. Kahit si Aki rin ay hindi ko magawang istorbohin dahil alam kong pagod siya at marami ring inaasikaso. Nahihiya rin akong magsabi sa kaniya minsan kasi alam kong kahit na nasa ibang bansa man siya ay babalik talaga siya ng Pilipinas para sa akin.
I tried to control my tears but I really can't, it keeps falling down.
Natatakot din ako minsan kasi sa tuwing nagkakasakit ako, nanunumbalik ang lahat ng takot ko sa lahat ng bagay. I am shaking and I can feel my hands are slowly getting colder. I shut my eyes and prayed to God in my mind to guide me right now. I know that he's the only one who's there for me.
I feel bad, but I must admit this... Sometimes, I am praying if I need something from God. Ganoon akong klaseng tao, nananalangin lang kapag may kailangan sa Panginoon. I have that awful side and I won't deny that because that's the fact. I am still glad that God is still there for me even though I turned my back to Him for how many times. But.. these days, I realized that I shouldn't pray just because I need something from Him, but because I trust Him with all my heart, I have a faith in Him, I need Him, and because I am thankful to Him.
"Please, God, please," I pleaded whispery and stick my palms together. "I really can't take care of myself if I am sick, please send someone.. send an angel who can take care of me," I prayed, begging to the Lord.
It took an hour and I fell asleep while praying. I woke up when I felt someone's caressing my hair. I slowly opening my eyes. It was a blurry vision at first, but eventually.. I saw Jaxxon, clearly. Nakakunot ang kaniyang noo habang hinahaplos ang aking buhok. Tiningnan niya lang ako saglit bago kumuha ng isang mainit na bimpo para idampi iyon sa mukha ko. Hinayaan ko lamang siya at tahimik na pinagmasdan.
"Ngayon lang tumila ang malakas na ulan.. at siguradong lumabas ka kanina," panimula niya habang pinupunasan ng bimpo ang mukha ko. "Nabasa ka at basa pa rin ang buhok mo," puna niya.
"I-I am sick," I stated the obvious. "Please take care of me, Jaxx, please..."
"I will, Zan," he surely responded and nodded his head. "Sa susunod ay kailangan mong mag-ingat dahil hindi palagi ay nariyan ako para sa 'yo. You should know how to take care of yourself when you're sick."
"I-I've been taking care of myself almost all of my life," I condemned bitterly. "P-Pagod na ako sa kaaalaga sa sarili ko. I-Ikaw muna, please, kahit ngayon lang," I begged.
"Nandito na ako ngayon, hindi kita pababayaan," he comforted me. "Gabi na at magluluto ako para sa panghapunan natin. Kailangan mong kumain dahil iinom ka ng gamot. Kailangan mong uminom ng gamot para mabilis kang gumaling."
"Oo, alam kong kailangan kong uminom ng gamot pero wala ako niyon, eh."
"You'll stay here, okay?" sa halip ay tugon niya, hindi yata naintindihan ang sinabi ko. "Magluluto muna ako ng makakain natin para makapaghapunan na tayo at makainom ka na ng gamot mo."
"I have no medicine here," I repeated clearly.
"See? You have no medicine but you let yourself get sick?" he said sarcastically. "I have a medicine kit, ikukuha kita ng paracetamol dahil ang init mo nang hinawakan kita. Mabilis tumaas ang lagnat mo kaya sa susunod ay dapat ka nang magdoble ingat para makaiwas sa sakit."
"I know, I know," masungit kong sambit at hinawakan ang bimpong pinupunas niya sa mukha ko. "Mabuti nga't nandito ka, akala ko ay bukas ka pa uuwi, eh."
"I told you, I'll try to leave early," he reminded. "Akala ko pa nga ay umalis ka dahil walang tao sa sala.. and then, I found you here. I'm sorry if I entered your room without your permission. Nag-aalala kasi ako at baka napa'no ka na," pahayag niya pa at huminga nang malalim. "I hope tomorrow, you'll be okay."
I reached for his hand and held it. Hinayaan niya naman ako at bumaba lang ang kaniyang tingin sa kamay kong nakahawak sa kaniyang kamay. I squeezed his palm to get his attention. I smiled in triumph when he looked at me.
"I know.. this is too much to ask but.. can you file a leave for tomorrow, Jaxx?" I favored pleasingly. "A-Ayoko na kasing nag-iisa ako rito na nilalagnat ako."
Hinaplos niya ang aking buhok gamit ang kaniyang isa pang kamay, napapikit naman ako dahil doon. He interlocked our fingers and lifted our hands on the air. He could not take his eyes off me when he lowered his head to kiss the back of my hand.
"Hindi ako makakahindi sa 'yo, Zani," he whispered. "Nandito lang ako, hindi kita iiwan. Kung kailangan mo 'ko, nandito lang ako..."
"Thank you," I thanked him. "Thank you for being here with me, Jaxx. Salamat din dahil pumayag kang lumiban sa trabaho mo bukas. I am thankful and sorry at the same time because you'll leave your work for a day just because of me."
"It doesn't matter, Zan, marami namang mas magaling pang doktor kaysa sa akin sa Sanitarium, eh. Kung kailangan mo 'ko rito, nandito lang naman ako. Tatawag na lang ako roon at ipaalam sa kanila na hindi muna ako makakapasok bukas," paliwanag niya.
After a brief chitchat with him, he decided to cook a soup and a food for our dinner. Nagpaalam din siya para tumawag sa ospital na pinagtratrabahuhan niya at ipaalam doon na liliban muna siya bukas. Hindi ko alam pero natutuwa talaga ako sa kaniya, ang bilis niyang pumayag pagdating sa akin. I really wronged for thinking that he has bad intentions that's why he chased me for years. Nahihiya nga ako kasi pinag-isipan ko siya ng ganoon.
After he cooked our dinner, he guided me and accompany me to the longue. He supported me on my waist when he made me sat on the mod cushion. He sat beside me and get the soup on the table. Inihipan niya pa ang soup sa kutsara bago isubo sa akin iyon.
"You're spoiling me, Jaxx. Baka masanay ako, ha," I joked and chuckled. "Baka pati yata pagpapaligo sa akin ay ikaw pa ang gumawa, eh."
Napailing lamang siya sa akin. "Kumain ka muna para mainom mo na ang gamot mo."
I glanced at the table and saw that there's a paracetamol there. Obviously, that medicine is the one that I should take. Everytime, I get sick, I slept all day, laying down on my bed until I become okay. Ganoon talaga sa tuwing nagkakasakit ako, tinitiis ko lang hanggang sa maging okay ako. Minsan ay wala rin akong magagawa kapag may shooting ako dahil hindi rin basta-bastang lumiban ako. The agency is the one that scheduling my shooting everyday, I don't have any day off actually.
Sometimes, I'm lucky if I have an issue, because that would be the reason why my shooting get postpone. My industry will continue it once the issue die down. Minsan pa nga ay parang gusto ko tuloy magka-issue kaso hindi naman puwede iyon dahil baka tuluyan na akong masira. And moreover, the industry won't count the days I missed to the days, weeks, months, or years on my contracts. There's no easy in life anymore, especially in this generation. Sa bawat lipas ng araw ay mas lalong humihirap ang buhay.
Kumakayod lamang ako para sa sarili ko at para makapag-ipon ng pera para sa mga plano ko. I only lived alone not until Jaxxon moved at my place. I don't even know where did my parents are. I'm still enraged but at the same time, I felt sorry for them. Ayokong kausapin sina mommy at daddy kasi galit ako sa kanila, 'yong sugat na dinulot nila noon ay baon pa rin sa puso ko hanggang ngayon.
They faked their love, feelings, relationship, and everything. Even though they fell out the love, they keeps forcing themselves to each other and made me believe that they're the best couple even though they are not. Pinaniwala nila ako sa isang kasinungalingan, sa isang bagay na wala namang katotohanan. I was really selfish for forcing them to fix their marriage when both of them signed the divorce paper. Bilang isang anak, iyon ang pinakamasakit na nangyari sa buhay ko. All of my perspectives in love faded away. Aside from that, I have a lot of experiences in life and I could not even list it one by one.
"Heto, kumain ka pa." Biglang nagsalita si Jaxxon sa gitna ng pag-iisip ko. "Huwag ka munang mag-isip ng kung ano-ano para hindi sumakit ang ulo mo."
I did not respond, I remained silent until Jaxxon called out my name. Hindi pa rin ako sumagot at nanatiling walang-imik lamang. I was staring at the table when something popped in my mind. I realized that I should give something to Jaxxon because of everything he did for me. Gusto kong suklian ang lahat ng kabutihan niya sa akin sa kabila ng pagbitiw ko ng mga masasakit na salita sa kaniya.
"Zani," he called me for uncounted times. "Stop thinking too much, that would stress you out. Hindi ka makakain nang maayos niyan," aniya 'tsaka nilapag sa lamesa ang bowl na may lamang soup.
"How can I pay you back?" I asked and lifted my head to look at him. "Paano ko susuklian ang lahat ng mga ginawa mo sa akin?"
His brows furrowed, looked clueless, but eventually.. he arched a brow when he understand my question. "You don't need to take back if I gave something to you, Zani. Sapat na sa aking pinasalamatan mo 'ko at.. sapat nang pinahalagahan mo ang mga ginawa ko. Now.. stop thinking about it. Wala lang sa akin iyon, masaya na rin akong pinatira mo 'ko rito."
"Uhm.. earlier, I entered your room," I started a new conversation, changing the topic obviously.
"Huh?" He blushed and I know the reason why. "And then?"
"I saw your DSLR camera and the pictures inside," I told him. "Ako lahat ang nasa mga litrato roon, hindi ba?" I asked the obvious. "Hindi ka lang magaling gumuhit at magpinta, magaling ka rin kumuha ng magandang anggulo. The photos were taken perfectly. Parang wala akong nakikitang mali, pasensya ka na kung pinakialaman ko iyon."
"Oh," tanging nasabi niya lang. "I-It's okay..."
Nagulat na lang ako nang bigla siyang tumayo at naghubad ng kaniyang pang-itaas na damit. I almost whispered a wow when I saw his six packs abs. I could not stop myself from staring at it because it really caught my attention. Kulang na lang ay maglaway ako roon. Mabuti na nga lang ay hindi niya ako napansin na nakatitig doon. I looked away and pretended that I am staring at my unfinished soup on the table. I can see him staring at me through my peripheral vision. My eyes widened when he sat back and placed his arm on the backrest.
Napalunok ako at umusog nang kaunti, lumayo ako nang maramdaman ko ang init ng kaniyang katawan sa akin. I can feel that I am blushing right now. I can feel the heat over my face and I could not even do anything to cover it up. Why is he half naked right now? Oh gosh! I hoped silently in my mind to wash my thoughts away about some dirty things.
Are we going to have sex here? Oh goodness. No, not here... I am not ready to that.. yet. It was too early for us to do that and we're not even a couple or in a relationship!
"H-Hey! Hey!" I immediately stopped him when he was about to lean closer. I pushed him on his chest. Tila napapaso akong lumayo sa kaniya at umiwas ng tingin. "Jaxx, I am sick, I have a fever and I can't do what you want to do right now..."
Bigla na lang siyang napagalpak ng tawa at doon ko mas lalong na-appreciate kung gaano siya kaguwapo. "Zan, magpapaalam sana ako sa 'yo dahil maliligo muna ako."
"Oh!" I laughed awkwardly. "Sana sinabi mo na lang, bakit ka pa kasi dumidikit sa akin? Eh..."
"I don't know that I have an affect on you, Zani."
Mas lalo akong namula. Putang ina! Nakakahiya! At teka.. ibig sabihin ay papayag akong makipag-ano sa kaniya kapag hindi ako nilalagnat ngayon?
Oh gosh! Tinampal ko ang aking noo dahil sa kahihiyang natamo. This is so embarrassing!