"My Heart Is Yours."
[23]
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I laid in my bed as the thunder roared, my breath deepened. I could not sleep. I don't know if it was the rumbling storm outside my window, or the fact that the incident with Lord Davenport stamped itself in my memories, taking front stage. I rolled around in my cold bed, seeking any sign of comfort but I found none.
I sat up in bed, my curly hair pooled at my shoulders. I gulped deeply before getting out bed. Since I only had on my sleeveless night gown you could see the bruises on my wrists that were already darkening on my skin. I walked out of my room and went straight to the kitchen to prepare myself a cup of tea. The room was dimly lit, you could hardly see your own hand in front of you. I walked over towards a table that had a half used candle on it with a box a matches next to it. I grabbed the matches and lit the candle. The room illuminated slightly and I could finally see the walls around me, a tranquil feeling spread through my blood.
"Trouble sleeping?" I heard someone say, which made me look up to see Benedict.
I hummed, beginning to prepare myself a cup of tea, I wonder if Miss Kate Sharma told Anthony what happened... and I wonder if Anthony told Benedict. "I suppose." I said pouring the hot water that was in the glass teapot into the cup, the liquid turned a mellowed brown. "Did Lord Davenport say anything to you?" He asked, which made my movements still. The room flickered with light from the storm.
"No." I lied. Why did I lie?
I heard Benedict's footsteps come closer to me, I began stirring sugar into my cup. "Hope." He said in a certain tone, I seen in the corner of my eye that he was now right beside me, back leaned against the table. His arms were crossed as he looked at me, but I couldn't look at him. "Look at me." He said softly. I sipped the warm tea, before I sat down the cup. I felt his pointer finger and middle finger curve under my chin and turn my face to look at him.
He looked concerned, deeply concerned.
"You can tell me." He said, which caused my eyes to sting. I swallowed deeply before glancing around the room. "I can't," I said if I could muster what happened in words I would. Benedict didn't look disappointed at my answer, he nearly never was. Every time I was dealing with my own demons or some person who tried to insult me, I couldn't help but take it to heart, but Benedict would always wait until I was ready to explain how I felt.
"Whatever Lord Davenport has said to you--." I cut him off with a hug, my face buried in his chest and I squeezed my eyes shut. I felt arms slowly wrap around me, engulfing me in warmth. I felt him place his chin on the top of my head.
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It was the next ball of the evening and the theme was the color creme and pink. The room the hall was stationed was painted a mute pink, which made the room appear bigger than it was. Some of the invited guests were waltzing on the dance floor to the county-like music.
Hope stood beside Daphne who was talking to a group of guests, she smiled her pearly white teeth at them which could charm just about anyone.
Hope sighed before looking around the room, nearly everyone was dancing or laughing, enjoying the night.
"Well isn't this awful?" She heard an almost nasally soft spoken voice beside her. She turned her head curiously to see a girl with deep brown hair and fair-toned skin. Her cheeks were plush with a reddened blush, and her lips were in a permanent pout. She wore a long-sleeved silk creme dress and she wore a gold tiara on her head. "Pardon me? You are...?" Hope said with a raised eyebrow.
"Duchess Agnes Albertine of Melckenburg-Strelitz." She said, turning her nose up. Hope's eyes widened slightly before she bowed. "Your Grace, pardon my forgetfulness." She said, Agnes Albertine was quick to wave her off. "No need for formalities, I'm trying not to be known here." She said sassily. Hope looked at the duchess even more curiously than before.
"I am—." Hope was cut off.
"Hope Buckingham. Daughter of Walter Buckingham, but you stay with Bridgerton's. Yes, I know much about you." She says, before grabbing a glass of gin from one of the passing trays. "Well, I assume so. Lady Whistledown has my entire life down in her pamphlets, I can never keep anything a secret." Hope said the Duchess rolled her eyes at her words.
"I can hardly call that true. I believe that you have things in your life Lady Whistledown will never know about, right Miss Buckingham?" She asked, she said those words as if she knew her life better than Hope herself. Miss Buckingham cleared her throat and looked away. A sly smirk worked its way on Agnes's lips before she saw a man walk up to her.
He seemed to have horrible sideburns and what Hope could tell, horrible breath.
"Your Grace, it has been far too long. Please allow me to take your first dance." He said, displaying his hand towards Agnes Albertine. "Mister Orlow! Please allow me to touch upon the fact that you've had—what—two, three deceased wives? And about five kids that would never dare step foot in your estate because of your lack of manners and a brain. Next time you approach me in such an untimely manner at least have your life in check. Thank you, Mister Orlow!" She shouted with a fake smile, some of the guests turned their heads to look at her.
Hope was surprised, to say the least. She thought Eloise was the pentacle of the rejection against men but Agnes fought hard for the spotlight position. Mister Orlow glanced around with a scowl before walking away.
"It seems you are not the only woman of the ton who despises men," Hope said with a chuckle. The Duchess scoffed. "Nonsense, I love men." She said before taking a swig of her drink.
✑
During the most part of this ball, Kate stood right next to her sister, Edwina. Well, until her baby sister was asked to dance by the Viscount Bridgerton. So she stood alone in the crowd of people who watched as they danced, Edwina looked entirely in love.
The same cannot be said for Anthony.
Kate sighed before straightening her very mute pink dress that was embedded with diamonds. She kept her stance strong before everyone. Her eyes skimmed the room before she had dared to see Lord Davenport chugging down a glass of gin. He drunkenly walked up to Benedict who seemed to be embedded into a conversation with Katherine.
"Mr. Bridgertonn~. How lovely a woman you have next to you, your name please~." He said drunkenly, Benedict looked back before chuckling. "His lordship is drunken! Careful not to regurgitate on everyone." He said.
Kate clenched her jaw before turning her nose up in the air sharply. She walked confidently over to the three of them, almost as if she were on a mission.
"Mr. Bridgerton, I hope you are well! Have you heard from Miss Hope Buckingham at all this evening?" Kate Sharma said Benedict's eyes looked at her before he turned his body to face Kate. "Unfortunately, no. I can go search for her if she is needed." He said, nearly about to step away.
"I would assume her absence is expected... given the event that happened yesterday that I dare not speak of." Kate hissed, looking right at Lord Davenport who looked ultimately caught. Benedict looked between the two of them with confusion, did something happen to Hope that he was not told of?
"Pardon me?" He said, unable to keep up.
"Our most kind-hearted Lord Davenport approached Miss Buckingham in the most inappropriate of manner during the hunt, but Hope thankfully stopped him just in time with a nice hit to the abdomen. Deservedly so." Her doe eyes stared at Lord Davenport like she hated him more than she hated Anthony.
Benedict's face went silent. To say he was angry was an understatement... he was furious. Though Benedict was the kind of man to hold such emotions inside of himself. His eyes trailed from Lord Davenport to Hope who was dancing with Colin, her eyes were already on his.
She knew that he knew.
Benedict looked down at his shoes, clenching his hands into fist. He couldn't even fathom what Lord Davenport had done to her before she had to intercede. But, a straining grin worked its way onto his lips before he looked up at the man who looked at him with a fear in his eyes.
"You will never speak to Hope again." He said shortly, meanwhile Lord Davenport looked big eyed. "I ought to be—." His words cut off by Benedict stepping forward, his eyes practically flash red and the smile on his face turned into a cold stance.
"You ought to be buried if you so much as look in her direction." He hissed, everyone thought Anthony's anger was one not to be tested but... Benedict was a tame lion... if needed he'd turn into the worst.
"Be grateful you didn't receive a punch from a Bridgerton." He said before walking away from the two them, taking a beaming line towards Hope who nervously watched him barge towards her. "Miss Buckingham." He said before grabbing Hope's hand and snatching her from Colin, who watched them curiously run off.
Nothing was said as the two of them walked through the dimly lit halls. Benedict quickly searched for any open available room, and he did. The two of them quickly walked inside and Benedict let go of her hand, pacing around the room that looked to be Anthony's study.
Hope looked at him furrowed eyebrows, he unbuttoned his suit jacket, finally allowing him to breathe. "When were you going to tell me?" He asked, taking a glance over at Hope.
"I—I—. I wanted to... find the right time." Hope said, breathing slowly. "I should have known he was up to no good... I should have... I should have done more." Benedict said, he was blaming himself. If he didn't invite Lord Davenport to hunt with the gentleman he would have never touched Hope.
"Benedict." Hope began to protest before Benedict took off his jacket and placed it on the desk. "No. This was my fault, I should have protected you when you went off into the woods." He said, making Hope quickly step forward. "No! If anyone is to blame its Lord Davenport." She said, Benedict's eyes skimmed down to Hope's fidgeting hands, he noticed a purple, red bruise adorning all around her wrists, which were horrible hidden by a ruby bracelet.
His heart broke, his closest friend was nearly... nearly...
"I'm so sorry." Benedict said as he stood in front of Anthony's desk, eyes reddened. A single tear curved his cheek and Hope scurried over to him. "It is not your fault. The event has passed and there is nothing you could do now that could affect that past." She spoke softly to him as she cupped his face with her hands. The flicker of the lit fireplace not too far from them danced onto their contrasting skin.
Benedict's want to do better for the people he loves stems from his father's death. On the day of his passing his father offered to teach Anthony and him to shoot. Benedict was wanting to do other things that day so he declined, little did he know that would be the last day his father ever lived. He was stung... by a bee. Yes, you would not expect such a tiny creature to befall such an extraordinary eccentric man as the past Viscount.
But, after that day Benedict only felt one thing. Guilty. Maybe if he'd been there he could have warned his father about the bee, then he would still be here...
"I know... I just..." He trailed off. "I understand. But, do not worry. Lord Davenport's reputation shall be ruined after what he has done. I'm sure your mother can find some kind of gossip to stir up." Hope said with a determined nod, she smiled warmly before hugging Benedict tightly. He wrapped his arms around her without hesitation.
Now it's time to light a fire underneath Lord Davenport.
Hope parted from Benedict and gave him a quick smile before taking her leave. She walked down the hallways and heard the muffled sound of the orchestra. She breathed in before she went towards the drawing room, she wanted to retire after the heavy conversation. Once she approached the soft blue-colored door she wrapped her fingers around the door handle and pulled it open and walked inside the room.
Her mouth was agape as she saw Anthony and... Kate Sharma pull away from one another with a look of surprise. Hope's eyes widened and she slightly stepped back. "Oh! I'm so sorry." Hope said before turning on her heel and immediately walked out of the room, even though her name was being called.
She quickly went into the dining room and poured herself a large glass of whiskey, trying to forget what she saw. She thought they hated one another, but she was proven wrong. But, does Edwina know? She probably doesn't, if not... that was unfaithful of Miss Sharma. She took a gulp of the fiery liquid before she heard the door open behind her. She glanced behind her to see Anthony storming in, he looked frustrated.
"It's not what you think." He quickly said. Hope scoffed. "You are terrible at lying." She said.
"Hope." He tried to intercede as he approached her. "You are courting her sister!" Hope said, raising her tone. "And I have every intention of bringing it to a point." Anthony said.
"Why?" Hope asked.
"Because I am courting her! Because I have decided!" Anthony yelled. "So now what? You court Miss Edwina while frolicking with her sister? You expect to keep that a secret from her?" Hope asked, she knew Anthony was somewhat of a rake but something like this would ruin the reputation his family name.
"Nothing happened in that room!" He said, Hope scoffed again. He was atrocious at lying.
"It is clear that you have affection for Miss Sharma. The two of you cannot seem to stay away from one another." She said. Anthony breathed in sharply. "Really?! I could say the same for you and Benedict." He blurted out, her body stilled and she looked at him curiously. What on Earth was going on about?
"Those are two entirely different relations." She said defensively, Anthony poured himself a glass of whiskey and down it harshly. Hope breathed in deeply. "There is obviously something between you. And I know that this is not as you would wish it, but you must be honest with yourself." Hope said, Anthony clenched his jaw.
"Because one way or another, these kind of feelings always have a way of coming to the surface." She said, Anthony glanced away. "And what feelings are those?" He asked as if he didn't know.
Hope chuckled softly. "Well, love." She said. Anthony stood firmly on his feet. "Then I know what I must do." He said before Hope nods her head understandably and leaves the dining room.
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Dear gentle reader,
While much occurred at the Bridgerton country visit, this author feels not all is fit to print. Especially when so much is already known by far many members of the ton.
But if you thought we would reach the end of this journey without this trusted author finding a truly electable morsel of gossip, then you are sorely mistaken.
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The Bridgertons--except for Anthony-- as well as Hope Buckingham all stood outside of the estate, watching their guests get on their carriages and ride off back into town. Violet stood right next to her, bidding farewell to Lady Danbury and the Sharma family.
"I have arranged for some gossip to spread throughout the ton, dear. By tomorrow morning Lord Davenport shall be banished from London." Lady Bridgerton whispered to Hope who looked at her with surprise. "Really?" Hope said, it certainly did not take the woman long. Violet nodded her head with a hum. I saw Lady Danbury get into the carriage as well Lady Sharma, Miss Edwina was about to step inside before her sister called her name.
She turned to look at her curiously. "There is something I must tell you." Kate starts before Anthony storms out of the mansion. "Wait." He said before began walking up to the two sisters.
"Might I speak with you." He says, Miss Kate Sharma nodded her head with a softened expression. "Of course." She said before she had seen his eyes scan towards Edwina.
"That was meant for Miss Edwina." He says, which made Edwina look at him with confusion. "My lord?" She said before he suddenly knelt down on one knee before her. "Miss Edwina Sharma... Will you marry me?" He asked, presenting a very beautiful ring before her. Edwina looked at her sister like she could not believe this was happening to her, meanwhile, Kate held in a heart wrenching pain as she watched.
"Yes." She said with a growing smile. "Yes! Yes!" She began to laugh before taking off her glove.
"I shall be your viscountess. I shall marry you." She declared happily as Anthony placed the ring on her finger. Hope breathed in with a disappointed expression, he decided to shove the feelings down and worry about them later. He will certainly learn.
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Dear gentle reader,
Anthony Bridgerton is now betrothed to Miss Edwina Sharma. Victory, indeed.