Konohagakure no sato. Hokage's office…
"No… It can't be!"
"Yeah, it's good to see you too… baa-chan!"
"Naruto?" Tsunade asked with wide eyes.
'Orochimaru' rolled his eyes. "No, I'm the prince of Persia!"
"You bastard!" The Hokage shot up from her seat and went for a punch… only to freeze in the middle of it, after witnessing how 'Orochimaru's eyes turned black.
"Sure I am!" A quick burst of flames and 'Orochimaru' was replaced by Naruto. "You forgot the part where I'm a son of a bitch… oh, and quite a greeting by the way."
"Tch…" Tsunade hissed in anger. But slowly this anger started to turn into desperation. She couldn't move anything but her eyes and lips.
"Don't give me that look, Tsunade!" Naruto exclaimed. "Let's have a nice reunion hug!"
"Why are you here for?" She asked, trying to keep her cool and failing miserably.
"All business, huh?" The demon stood up. "Okay then. I came to kill you." He said and pointed two fingers at her forehead. "Hadou #4 Byakurai!"
Tsunade shut her eyes tight and prepared for the inevitable… Then she felt something touch her forehead… and push her back into her chair.
"Sorry, Tsunade. Another time." Naruto said and started to laugh at her expression.
"…"
"HAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA! You should've seen your face!" He shouted, falling back into his chair.
"Why…? Why didn't you kill me?" The Hokage asked, noticing that her body control has returned.
"Ahaha… Sigh… Don't be ridiculous." The demon replied. "If I really wanted to kill you, I would've done so just after I entered."
"Then why…?"
"Am I here?" He finished for her.
The slug sannin nodded.
"Can't I just want to talk to you?" Naruto asked.
Tsunade's eyes narrowed. "Not funny."
"You're right, it's not."
"Are you going…?"
"To answer your question?"
"Am I that predictable?"
"Yep!"
"Well, are you?"
"Sure! I'm here because… one time you called me worthless. I am not worthless!" He stated. "You said I can't do a shit, well tough luck! I learned how to dance Bacchkoi! I'll show you!"
Tsunade's eyes widened. "No! Please no! Anything but that!"
Naruto smirked. "Hmhmhm… Fine, fine. You know, we're quite similar you and me…"
"We have nothing in common!" She spat in anger.
The demon rolled his eyes. "Oh pu-lease! How about favorite sex position? I like it most when girls are on top! What about you?"
Tsunade's cheeks turned slightly pink. "What are you talking about, you idiot?"
"Sex position." Naruto repeated. "Do you like to be on top? Honestly?"
"Fuck you!"
"Oh, come on, don't be like that! Just tell me already!"
"Yes, I do!" The Hokage admitted in anger. "You happy now?!"
The demon smiled in satisfaction. "See?! That wasn't so hard!"
"I hate you!"
"Hahaha! Sure you do!" He replied. "The only question is… why?"
"You know very well why!" She hissed.
"Yep, I do… but do you?"
"What?" She asked in confusion.
"Do you know why you hate me?"
"Of course I do!"
"And?"
Tsunade gritted her teeth. "You Killed Jiraiya! You betrayed the village! You killed thousands of people! You…" She was about to continue, but was interrupted by Naruto's insane laughter.
"HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Do you even believe what you're saying?!"
"What are you talking about?"
"Hmhmhm… Ahhh… Ironic, isn't it?"
Sannin's eyes narrowed. "What is?"
Naruto sighed. "Our biggest similarity is that both of our lives were fucked up by the Hidden Leaf Village."
"You're delusional!" The Hokage screamed. "Konoha didn't fuck up my…" Last word died in her throat before she could say it. 'Oh my god! It did!'
"Ah! I see realization came to you!" Ex-jinchuriki stated. "Yep, we owe it all to good old Konoha!"
"Shut up!" The Hokage spat. "I'm sill nothing like you!"
"Of course not!" The demon replied with sudden anger, which startled Tsunade slightly. "Because I'm not a hypocrite!"
The woman glared. "I'm not a hypocrite!"
Naruto raised an eyebrow. "Oh really?!"
"Yes!"
"Then how about your proclamation about hating me?" He responded. "Let's see… oh yes, me betraying the village! Now we both know it's garbage. You don't give even a slightest damn about this village!"
"Yes I do!" She yelled back.
"No you don't! And stop lying to yourself!" The demon said. "Face it; you are here only because of me."
Her eyes widened. "N-No… I…"
"Sigh… Just admit it, it'll make things easier."
Silence.
"You ran away! Don't give me that look, yes you did!" Naruto screamed. "Sandaime allowed it only because you were his favorite student! Otherwise you would've been found and disposed off! Konoha does not forgive its traitors!"
Silence.
"Still not convinced, huh?" Naruto continued. "On to the next point then! What was there… oh yes, me killing thousands of people! Now what the fuck is with that?! Don't tell me you give a shit about some people?"
"I do! I…"
"No you don't!" He cut her off. "And you never did! You only cared about people close to you…"
"That's why I will never forgive you for killing Jiraiya!" She screamed.
Naruto smirked at this. "Hmhmhm… Never forgive me, huh? Not that I really care, but…"
"But what?!"
The demon shrugged. "I just don't know if I should tell this to you or not. This is really gonna blow your fucking mind…"
"Try me." She looked at him defiantly.
"You sure?"
The woman continued to stare.
"Well, don't blame me then." He replied. "You see, good old Jiraiya deserved death even by my standards, which is high. And not only for what he did to me, but generally as well."
"Oh?" Tsunade looked at him, definitely not believing. "And what's so horrible that he did?"
"I…" Naruto stopped. "How about I give you a hint? Remember the night your little brother died?"
She gritted her teeth. "Yes, I do."
"Remember what happened latter that night?" The demon continued.
"Orochimaru mocked me, and Jiraiya… he came to…"
"Make you feel better, ne?"
"Y-Yes… Are you saying that Jiraiya killed Nawaki?! And how the hell do you know about it?!" She yelled and shot up from her seat.
Naruto sighed. "Let's keep it civil, clam down and sit back."
Tsunade glared but still did so.
"Now let's continue. Where was I? Oh yes! What Jiraiya did…" Naruto said. "No, he didn't kill your brother. But before I say something else, tell me something. Have Jiraiya ever… loved someone?"
Tsunade started to open her mouth when Naruto spoke again.
"I'll give you another hint! She has stupid pink hair, flat chest and screams Shannaro a lot!"
Tsunade raised an eyebrow. "Sakura?!"
"Yes!"
Pause.
"HAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA! I just love that expression on your face!" The demon tried to calm himself down. "Of course I was just kidding. He always loved you."
"So?"
"Umm… how should I put it?" He thought for a moment. "How about this? Remember some useless piece of trash, who had long hair and also wanted to become a Hokage?"
"Don't you dare…!"
"Shut up!" Naruto interrupted angrily. "I'm the most daring fucking person in this world! Now answer the fucking question!"
"Yes." She responded through her anger and glared. "I remember him."
"Great!" Naruto smirked. "Then you must also remember the way he left this sinful world, ne?"
"You…!"
"Fucking answer, dammit!"
"Yes, I remember."
"Which was it?!"
"What?"
"Which way he was killed?"
"He…" Tsunade paused. "He suffered two major injuries. One to the heart and one to the liver…"
Naruto's smirk widened. "One of the two combinations even you can't save a person from, right?"
Sannin's eyes widened. "How do you…?"
"Later. Now answer this, isn't that strange? Out of your entire team only one member suffered an injure from unseen foe… and it's like this."
"What are you…?"
Now Naruto was annoyed. "Who knew about your skills and what you can and cannot do?!"
"Sandaime knew and…" Her eyes widened in realization. "Are you telling me…?"
"Finally!" Naruto exclaimed. "I was thinking you're not able to guess it on your own! After all…"
"Don't screw with me!" She interrupted. "Jiraiya killed Dan?! That's the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard!"
Naruto slapped his forehead. "Dammit… Alright, then tell me this. What happened when you returned from that mission?"
Tsunade thought for a moment. "Uh… Jiraiya came and… But that proves nothing!"
"Damn you're stubborn!" Ex-jinchuriki replied. "Fine, I wanted to show you this after all." With that he put his arm in his pocket and withdrew some small red book.
"What is this?"
Naruto grinned evilly. "This, my dear baa-chan, is your dearest Jiraiya's personal diary! Quite a thing actually!"
Tsunade's look hardened. "Are you taking me for a fool…?!"
"Yes, I actually do, but continue anyway." Naruto interrupted.
"Grr… Even if I do believe it's Jiraiya's diary, where could you get it?"
"Haha! A fine question indeed!" The demon responded. "You see, when I ditched your ex-teammate years ago, I knew he wrote some of the most important information somewhere. He was a human after all, and big amount of information causes headache. So in order to ditch not only him, but also his infamous spy network, I needed that information."
Naruto then caught her eyes and continued. "As you can see, I have found it…" He swirled the book in his hand. "And more so! After getting everything I needed, I decided what the hell?! Why not read earlier notes?! This is what I've found!" Ex-genin threw the book on Tsunade's desk, opening it in the process.
"Read it."
"I don't believe…" She started, but Naruto cut her off.
"Tsunade. Know your role, shut your mouth and read the damn thing!"
Hokage glared, but she really didn't have much of a choice.
April 21th…
God forgive me for what I'm about to do, because even I will never be able to forgive myself.
What she even saw in that weakling? I guess I won't understand no matter how hard I try…
Do I feel regret about what I'm about to do to that Hokage wannabe?! Nah!
But I do feel regret… because one more time I will see that look on the face of the woman I love…
Forgive me, Tsunade… but I just can't let someone else have you… I…
Tsunade's look said everything.
"This can't be true… THAT'S A LIE!"
"Hahahahaha… at last!" The demon said and clapped. "About time I say…"
"No…" Tears appeared in woman's eyes. "All my life I…"
"Was lied to and deceived by everyone." Naruto finished for her. "That's not your fault; you're just a really open person."
"B-But Jiraiya… How could he?" She was crying now.
Naruto rolled his eyes. "Oh, come on, wake up! Just like Dan could use his influence on you for his future Hokage campaign! Just how Nawaki could wish to dispose of you to become Shodaime's only successor!"
"W-What?!"
Naruto stood up, walked around the table, took her chair's arm and span around, making the woman to look at him again.
"That's why I said that we are similar." He said, standing really close now. "The truth is a hard thing to accept, but otherwise you will only continue to live in a lie."
Tsunade looked up at him in shock and her lower lip started to tremble a little.
The demon only smirked at this and leaned closer to whisper in her ear.
"They took your life away from you. It's not fair, is it?"
"N-No…" She whispered back.
"Of course not… And now, you're nothing but a shell of your former self, trying to find your sanctuary in alcohol and gambling."
Tsunade said nothing to that. She just cried.
Naruto stood up straight. "But you know, it will be a really sad end for you if it'll continue like this, so…" He put two fingers on her forehead.
"W-What are you doing?" The Hokage asked.
"Shh… just relax for a moment." The blond demon said quietly as his fingers started to glow light yellow.
"There." He said few minutes later. "Try to cancel your genjutsu now."
Woman's eyes widened. "What? But I…"
"Oh, just do it."
She hesitated for a moment. 'What the hell…'
"Hmhmhm… Now I suggest you look in the mirror." Naruto said in satisfaction.
Tsunade took out a mirror from her desk and… gasped.
"That's not possible! What have you done to me?!" She yelled.
"Exactly what it looks like." He leaned closer once again. "I gave you back what they took from you."
"But I'm looking even younger than in genjutsu!"
"Hmhmhm… That's because you used your thirties look." The demon replied. "And now you're twenty."
"Wha…?" Tsunade touched her face. "How?!"
Naruto shrugged. "It's only possible in your case. I simply reversed the effect of your Sozo Saisei and here you are!"
"B-But… That's not possible!"
"Don't you like it? I can take it back."
"I…" Tsunade bit her lower lip.
"I knew you'll like it!" Naruto stated.
The Hokage glared again. "But what's in it for you?!" She screamed. "What are you hoping to gain from it?!"
The demon grinned. "Do you really think I need something from you?"
"What then?!"
Naruto's smirk faded as he patted Tsunade's cheek. "I did it simply because I wanted to, that is all. You are not a bad person, Tsunade, you deserve better."
"What are you…? But I'm your enemy!"
"Oh really?" Ex-jinchuriki replied. "Sandaime fucked up my childhood, Jiraiya left me behind, Orochimaru tried to kill me… you did so as well, but only after I admitted my betrayal. So let me tell you this… no you're not!"
"Yes I am!" She yelled at him. "I'm going to stop you no matter what you say!"
"Haha! Stop me from doing what?"
"Well…" Tsunade hesitated. "Whatever it is you're planning!"
"And what do you know about my intentions?"
"I… you… Why won't you tell me then?"
'Let's see if this works…' Naruto frowned. "Unfortunately, that I cannot tell. But I think you should know… I never enjoyed what I did… or what I have become…"
"Yes you did! You killed all those losers with a smile on your face, you psycho!" Yamato commented.
'Shut up! She doesn't need to know that.'
"Yeah, right!" Tsunade responded. "And you destroyed Wave Country because?"
"Because I…" Smirk returned on his face. "Haha! Sorry, I can't take it! Yes, I lied, I enjoy what I become very much! I'm stronger, faster, I feel less pain, I regenerate in a matter of seconds, and I can have sex for a week straight! Doesn't it sound great?"
"You surrendered your humanity!"
"Nope! I sold it, and for a good price! And now you are enjoying the results of it as well!"
The Hokage gritted her teeth. "Enough of your mind games. What do you want?"
Naruto leaned even closer, so his face was almost inches from hers.
"Why, I want to give you what you want of course!"
"Oh really?" She asked. "Are you going to commit suicide?"
"Haha! Smart mouth you have there!" The demon replied. "Of course not! Why would I return your youth if I wanted to kill myself? No, I have something else in mind!" With that he picked her up and placed on her desk.
"Naruto?! What are you…?" She was interrupted when her mouth was shut down… by his.
'What is he doing?!' The Hokage thought.
"You know… I always wanted to do you." Naruto stated. "But your age was in the way all the time. So I had to find a way and fix it!" He said, starting to massage her breasts.
"What are you doing, stop!" She tried to struggle, but he was beyond strong.
Suddenly he stopped and moved his face a mere inch away from hers once more.
"Do you think I haven't noticed?" The demon said, his hot breath touching her lips. "How you looked at me when I returned…"
"I…"
"Don't. Your eyes told me stories. How you longed…" Their bodies were now pressed together. "How you desired…" He licked her upper lip, which sent shiver down her spine. "How you wished… To feel just one more time… what it is to be loved."
"We can't… I can't…" She whispered.
"Why not?"
"Because… because…" Tsunade leaned closer. "Oh, fuck this!" She exclaimed, wrapping her arms around Naruto's neck and claiming his lips.
'There we go!' Naruto thought with satisfaction.
'Shit… is this really happening?' Tsunade thought in slight shock.
"Can't fucking wait anymore!" Naruto stated, pulling Tsunade's pants off. "Oh-ho! Someone's eager already!"
"Sh-Shut up!"
"No I won't!" The demon replied. "I think I'll just do this!" He removed his own pants and…
Tsunade's eyes widened. "Wait! It's been too long since…"
"If you wanna see Naruto fuck Godaime Hokage senseless, give me a HELL YEAH!"
"KYAH!" She screamed when Naruto entered her in one quick thrust.
"Nice!" He exclaimed. "I wondered what it'll feel like to fuck you for three fucking years! I must say, I'm not disappointed so far!"
Tsunade's mind started to give in. 'I can't… His shape… It feels so good! I need… I need more!' With that she wrapped her legs around his waist, pulling him closer.
"Oh yeah!" Naruto said, beginning to move his hips back and forth at high pace.
Woman's head arched backwards. "Ah! Hold me! Hold me tighter! Yes!"
"Feels good, doesn't it?" The demon breathed in her neck.
"Yes! It feels great!" She screamed. "Please don't stop!"
Naruto smirked. "Good idea, but…" He picked her up and turned around, leaning his back on the desk afterwards. "Why don't you try that new body of yours and move by yourself?"
Without any words Tsunade did just that, hopping up and down on Naruto's rock hard cock.
"That's a nice girl!" He said as his smirk widened.
"Fuck you, Naruto! Ah!" The Hokage exclaimed in pleasure.
"Oh yes, please do so!" Naruto replied.
"Fuck you…! Fuck me! Fuck me harder!"
"Sure!" He said, starting to thrust upwards.
"Ah!" Her head arched backwards once more. "I feel it…! I'm nearing my limit!"
Naruto licked his lips. "Then I guess I just have to add a little something to push you over." With that he inserted his finger into her ass.
Tsunade's eyes shot wide open. "Wait! What are you doing, you idiot! That's my… ah!"
"Hmhmhm… maybe I should stop then?" Naruto asked.
But Tsunade gave no reply… She couldn't. Her mouth was wide open and her eyes were shut tightly.
'Oh my god… oh god… This is it… THIS IS IT! I'm cumming!'
"This is gonna be a blast!" Naruto stated. 'Thank god I used the silencing genjutsu…'
"Ah… AH… AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH HHHHH!" Tsunade screamed, unable to hold it any longer. Her body shook and twitched at the insane amount of pleasure she was receiving from the first orgasm in twenty five years.
Finally it ended and she fell on top of him, panting heavily.
"You know… It wasn't bad, I expected less from you." The demon said after some time.
"What?! That wasn't enough for you?!"
"I still haven't cum if you didn't notice."
Tsunade turned her head. Indeed, he didn't even remove himself yet.
"Oh? Tough guy, huh?" She asked, standing up and kneeling in front of her desk. "Let's see how you handle this then! I'm still the master of chakra control if you don't remember!"
"Oh really?"
"Take this!" Tsunade exclaimed, taking him into her mouth.
"Yoooo…" Naruto said. "Now that feels niiiiiice…"
"How about this then?" She asked, placing him between her breasts and using her mouth at the same time.
"Ho! I always wanted to fuck these enormous melons of yours!" Naruto stated, placing his hands behind his head.
"I'm not called the 'Legendary Sucker' just for losing bets, you know…" Tsunade said, licking the tip of his dick with her tongue.
"I can see that much already." Naruto responded.
"Hmhmhm…" The woman chuckled. "Looks like someone's happy around here." She replied, massaging Naruto's balls. "And it also looks like someone's about to give up. This thing is throbbing like crazy!"
"I won't…!" Naruto stated, gritting his teeth.
"Come on; give it up, you son of a bitch!" She yelled, stroking him fast with her hand.
"Shit!"
"Give it to me, Naruto!" Tsunade opened her mouth wide.
"Guh!" The demon twitched, finally unable to resist the overwhelming feeling.
"Mmm!" Tsunade moaned with satisfaction when first drops of Naruto's cum landed in her mouth… and on her face… and on her breasts… and on her…
"Oh my god!" Her eyes widened in surprise. She was already drenched, but this dick just kept ejaculating! "Holy shit!"
"Sigh…" Naruto breathed deeply after his seed stopped to come out. "That was sure one of the best blowjobs I've ever received!"
"I knew you will like it." Tsunade said with a smirk.
"The only thing I don't understand…" He continued. "Is what are you smiling about? I'm your enemy, am I not? And here you are, covered in my cum. Strange, huh?"
The shock of situation dawned on Tsunade.
"What… What do you want?" She asked with desperation in her voice.
Naruto kneeled beside her. "Isn't it obvious? I want you beside me."
Tsunade gasped. "You… I can't!"
"Why not?! This village betrayed you! These people betrayed you! Your so-called friends betrayed you!"
"You betrayed me as well." She added.
Naruto smirked. "Oh, very good! But consider this, it's one person against the entire village. I think the choice is obvious."
Tsunade sat in silence for some time.
"I… I can't…"
"Too bad." Naruto stood up and put his pants on. "Yes, very bad indeed… I lost two bucks to my sword. Such a shame…" And with that he jumped out of the window, leaving shocked and broken Tsunade alone in her office.
Kurenai's apartment…
"Hahaha! Am I good, or am I good!"
"Neither, you're one sly son of a bitch!" Yamato commented.
"Damn right!"
"Where the hell have you been?!"
Naruto turned around.
"Kurenai?" He paused. "Umm… well I…"
"It doesn't matter where you've been!" She exclaimed.
Blonde's eyes widened. "Wha…?" His question was interrupted by one pair of soft lips, pressing onto his.
"You talk too much, dammit! Hurry up and do me already!"
Naruto chuckled. "Yes, ma'am!"
Next morning. Tenten's apartment…
That was one of the most wonderful mornings in Tenten's life. Why you ask? Because she found a very sleeping and very naked Neji in her bed. Instantly she remembered what happened last night, and it brought a warm smile on her face.
'He finally did it!' She thought happily, stroking his hair. 'He looks so peaceful…'
And then it happened. Tenten stroked Neji's hair once again, removing some locks from his face… And bandages on his forehead fell off.
Girl's eyes widened. 'What? Where is…'
The seal was gone.
Tenten remained still for some moments, thinking for a possible reason… and she found one.
'I guess I'll go thank her.' She thought, getting out of her bed.
Hyuga estate…
"Man… I forgot how huge it is…" Tenten said, walking closer.
"State your business here." The guard exclaimed when she walked closer.
"I um…" The girl hesitated. "I just wanted to talk to Hinata…"
Guard's eyebrows furrowed. "Hinata-sama is in the middle of an important meeting. She can not be disturbed right now."
Tenten frowned. "Oh… it's alright, I'll come back later." She turned around and was about to walk away, when…
"Tenten?" Familiar voice asked from behind. "What are you doing here?"
The bun haired girl turned back. "Hinata…"
Yes, there stood Hinata… alongside Danzou.
"So?" The clan head pressed.
"I uh… I just wanted to thank you."
Hinata raised an eyebrow. "Thank me for what?"
"For removing Neji's caged bird seal of course!"
Hinata's eyes widened. Danzou's eyes widened.
"Danzou-san, you have my full permission." Byukugan user stated.
"Thank you." The old war hawk replied. "But I'll feel safer if you'll come with me."
Hinata nodded. "Very well." Then she turned to Tenten. "You are coming with us as well." That was not a question.
Random Konoha street…
"Uwaaaaah!" Neji exclaimed, stretching. "That certainly felt nice! No wonder he do that every chance he gets…"
The ANBU commander rubbed his eyes again, trying to wake up completely.
Then suddenly…
"Neji!"
"Huh?" He turned around to see Hinata, Tenten and… Danzou standing side by side.
"Ha!" Hinata did one handed seal and… nothing.
Neji sighed in defeat. "Stupid girl, what have you done…?"
"It's not working!" Hinata stated.
"The seal must really be gone then." Danzou added.
Neji shrugged. "No point in hiding it now." With that he removed his Konoha headband and threw it away. Indeed, his forehead was white and clear.
"B-But if Hinata didn't remove the seal… t-then who d-did?" Tenten stuttered.
Neji snorted. "Take a guess."
"Uzumaki Naruto." Danzou stated.
"And we have a winner!" Neji said and clapped.
"Well then…" Hinata started. "Hyuga Neji! In the name of Hokage and the Hyuga clan you are hereby under arrest! Surrender yourself peacefully and your life might be sparred."
Ex-ANBU commander chuckled. "Now look what you've done, they're going to kill me. Couldn't you keep your mouth shut?"
Tenten's eyes widened. "B-But I…"
"That's not her fault." Danzou said. "You were under suspicion already, she just confirmed it."
Neji shook his head. "Tsk, tsk, tsk… that's just too bad."
"Are you going to surrender peacefully?" Hinata asked once more.
"Ahahaha! What do you think?!" Was her cousin's response.
"I think not." Danzou replied and snapped his fingers.
Immediately Neji was surrounded by at least two dozens of ANBU.
"ROOT?" He raised an eyebrow. "My! Looks like I'm in trouble!" The teen added with a hint of sarcasm.
"Give it up, Neji." Hinata stated. "You have no chance."
"Oh really?"
"Yes, really."
"How certain you are!" Neji exclaimed. "But I want to find out! Hakkesho Kaiten!" He shouted and five ANBU members were thrown backwards.
"Seize him!" Danzou screamed. "Alive if possible!"
Instantly ROOT came on the offensive. Three shinobis attacked at the same time, but Neji wasn't called a prodigy for nothing.
"Hakke Kusho!" Two out of three ninjas were thrown into a stone wall and a sickening crack was heard when their skulls connected with hard rock.
"Ups, missed one." Hinata's cousin said, striking the third one right in the heart and killing him instantly. "Haha, mindless tools are not the best warriors, you know…"
"Attack him!" Danzou shouted once more.
Five more shinobis attacked Neji from all sides.
"Damn, like locusts!" He exclaimed and somersaulted over them. "Well, it's been a nice party and all, but I guess I'll be off." And with that he started running.
"Stop him!" Hinata screamed.
"He's trying to escape from the village!" Danzou added. "Send reinforcements, block the main gates!"
"Hai, Danzou-sama!" Some ROOT ANBU said and disappeared in a puff of smoke.
"What's the commotion?" Sudden voice asked.
Hinata turned around to see Kakashi, Sasuke and Lee.
"Good timing." She stated. "We've confirmed the identity of a traitor... it's Hyuga Neji."
"Impossible!" Lee screamed. "Neji would've never…!" Then he noticed Tenten's face. "Tenten?"
"I… It's true, Lee…" She whispered quietly. "I didn't want to believe… but he just killed several Konoha ninjas in cold blood."
"Can't be…" Gai's favorite student exclaimed in disbelief.
"What's the situation?" Kakashi asked.
"His identity has been compromised, so he's currently trying to escape the village." Danzou responded. "We must stop him at all cost."
"Understood. Let's go, Sasuke." The masked jounin said and jumped off.
"Are you going, Lee?" Uchiha asked.
"I…"
"Look, I know what you feel more than anyone." The last Sharingan user stated. "But if you want some answers, then come and face him directly."
Lee's head shot up. "Yes, you're right!"
"Wait, I'm coming with you!" Tenten said.
"You'd better not…" Sasuke countered.
"I will!" She said with determination. "Neji may be my closest friend… but I'm still a Konoha shinobi, and I will do my duty!"
Uchiha nodded. "Very well, let's go."
With Neji…
"Fucking Tenten…" Our hero thought, running through another Konoha street. "No, correction. Fucking NARUTO for telling me to get laid so much!"
Two chuunins appeared on his way.
"In the name of Hoka…" Poor guy didn't even get the chance to finish his sentence before a quick juuken strike to the heart relieved him of his… life.
"Imbecilles…" Neji muttered without stopping his run and even glancing at two men he just killed.
"Where are those fucking gates?!" He looked up… yep, the gates were there, but he was at least five minutes away from them. "Damn… gotta hurry!"
"Huyga Neji! You… GUH!" Another ninja fell limply on the ground.
"Why are those guys talking so much?! Is this Konoha's greatest weapon?!" Neji asked himself. "It probably is, because I don't see another one." He stated, continuing to run forward.
"Idiot! I should just ignore that blonde motherfucker! But no! I'm a Hyuga, I have pride!" Hinata's cousin mocked. "Finally, the gates… closed. Fuck…"
Two gatekeepers got in his way.
"By the order of Hokage-sama…" One of them started. "The gates are to remain closed until…"
"Hakke Kusho!" Neji thrust his palm forward, knocking two men into the gates. "Sorry guys, but Hokage-sama's orders are… oh, you are dead already. Well then…"
Ex-ANBU commander concentrated harder. "I hope no one hears this…"
"Haaaaaa! Art is a blast! Hakke… Shintenkusho!"
BOOM!
The gates flew open.
"Ahh! The wonderful feeling of freedom!" Neji exclaimed… just as about twenty people landed around him.
"Or not…"
"Give up, Neji-kun." Kakashi started. "You don't have a chance against all of us."
Neji looked around. Indeed, there was Kakashi, Uchiha and Lee. The three of them were quite a challenge… but there were also at least fifteen jounins alongside them.
'And that's only until Hokage arrives.' Hyuga reminded himself. 'If that happens, then I'm fucked… Have to make it double quick!'
"So you actually think that I have no chance?"
Kakashi closed his only eye and shook his head.
"I not only think, I…"
"It doesn't matter what you think! Hakke Kusho!" Neji shouted and Kakashi was sent flying through some building.
"Haha! I always wanted to do that!" Hyuga laughed. "Is he really that pathetic without Sharingan?! If so, then this village is fucked!"
"Damn!" Sasuke cursed. "Lee, cover me! And remember, we need him alive!"
"Hai!"
"Sharingan!" Sasuke activated his doujutsu.
"Byakugan!" Neji activated his… and then one of the less experienced chuunins attacked him from behind. "Fool."
"No, don't!" Lee screamed, but it was already too late. Neji dodged under the incoming kunai thrust and hit the poor guy right in his heart.
"One down!"
"Dammit Neji! What are you doing?!" His ex-teammate yelled.
"Are you blind or what?! What does it looks like I'm doing?!" Neji replied with sarcasm.
"You're betraying Konoha!"
Neji smiled dumbly. "Umm… nope!"
"What do you mean nope?!"
Hyuga shrugged. "I'm not betraying Konoha simply because I was never loyal to Konoha in the first place!"
Sasuke's eyes widened, he recognized the excuse immediately. "So you're with Naruto then!"
Neji made a face. "Of course not! We're both into women, you know…"
"You know what I mean!"
"Kaiten!" Neji shouted, disposing of three more ninjas. "You talk too much, Uchiha. No wonder Naruto thinks you're a fool!"
"Shut up!" Sasuke exclaimed, drawing Rebellion. "I will stop him!"
"HAHAHAHAHAHA!" The traitor laughed hard. "Suuuuure! And I had sex with your mother…"
Uchiha's eyes widened again. "You're lying!"
"Of course I'm lying! That was Naruto!"
"Shut up!" This time enraged Sasuke attacked.
"Wait, clear your mind!" Rebellion corrected. "Do not let him provoke you!"
"How easy." Neji said, dodging the sword slash and…
"Dinamicu Entori!"
"Fuck!" Hyuga exclaimed, somersaulting backwards.
"Katon: Goukakyu no jutsu!" Some of jounins attacked and Neji had no other option but to evade once more.
"Double fuck! I need to get out of here."
"Stop him!" Sasuke shouted, using his instant move to appear in Neji's way.
"Damn!" Hyuga cursed, stopping in his tracks.
"Chidori Nagashi!" Sasuke shouted, thrusting his sword into the ground.
Neji watched chakra movement and jumped to get out of the way, but…
"Dinamicu Acushon!" Lee attacked from behind, delivering a crushing axe kick to Neji's shoulder.
"Gah!" Neji exclaimed in pain, holding his damaged left shoulder. "Fucking Lee…"
"I'm not finished!" Somehow the green clad jounin got behind his ex-teammate and grabbed his arms.
"Omote Renge!"
"Tough luck, Lee! Hakkesho Kaiten!"
"AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!" Gai's favorite student screamed in pain as his body was thrown away.
'Somehow I don't believe he's dead though…' Neji thought to himself.
Then…
"Stinger!" Sasuke slid towards him with his sword ready to strike.
'Damn! Can't dodge!' Of course, he was still in midair. 'Is this the end…? No, fuck it! Even if it is, I will sell my life at the highest price!'
With some unbelievable move, Neji twisted his body at the last second and instead of receiving a blade through his chest, he delivered an axe kick to Sasuke's shoulder just like Lee recently did.
"Ah!" Uchiha gasped in pain.
"Not yet!" Neji wanted to attack again, but felt some presence from behind. "Shin-ne!" He turned around to face… "Tenten?" He froze for a second and it cost him… everything.
"Senei-ta Jashu!"
Hyuga suddenly felt something wrapping around him. He looked down…
"Snakes… oh fuck…"
"Tell Tsunade I got him." Orochimaru stated with a smirk.
...
Omake: Naruto vs. The Original Naruto…
Naruto: "So? When are we going to help those poor guys?"
Darthemius: "Umm… Specify maybe?"
Naruto (Shrugging): "What about Sephiroth?"
Darthemius (Shaking his head): "Sorry, no can do, man. We can't destroy Square-Enix until they release Final Fantasy Versus XIII…"
Naruto (Scowling): "Fuck… What about Dr. Eggman?"
Darthemius: "Duh, already had this one. Blue hedgehog, remember?"
Naruto: "Oh yeah…"
Darthemius: "Don't worry; we still have lots of requests!"
Naruto: "Such as?"
Darthemius: "Well, here's one…"
"Good day to you. Now I'm writing this because I'm sick and tired of losing. I mean I have everything! Cool iron mask, nice outfit, hell I even have pretty good looks! So, how do you say it… oh yes! Why in the blue hell must I always lose to a couple of fucking turtles! Please do something about it, I'll pay!
Shredder."
Naruto (Shaking his head): "Poor guy… I mean to lose to a fucking turtle… that must be really humiliating."
Darthemius (Frowning): "Yeah, but I don't think we will be able to do something about it…"
Naruto (raising an eyebrow): "Why not?"
Darthemius: "We'll have problems with Greenpeace again… Remember the Hedgehog?"
Naruto (Sulking): "Yeah, motherfucker had surprisingly good lawyers…"
Darthemius: "You know, I'm kind of confused…"
Naruto: "What's wrong?"
Darthemius: "Well, there are billions of letters from adults all around the world, asking to kill, crush, disintegrate, maim, quart, burn alive… some evil group, called telletubbies…"
Naruto: "YEOW!"
Darthemius: "What?!"
Naruto: "Don't say this word!"
Darthemius: "What word? Telletubbies?"
Naruto: "Stop that! I mean it!"
Darthemius: "You know who they are?"
Naruto: "…No… But it sounds really terrifying…"
Darthemius (Sweatdropping): "Riiiiight… Anyway, what are we gonna do about Kishimoto?"
Naruto (In anger): "Motherfucker survived!"
Darthemius (With sarcasm): "I wonder how…"
Naruto: "Hey, don't look at me like that! I shoved a fucking RAIL up his ass! There's no way he could survive!"
Darthemius: "Yet he did… I wonder what he'll do now…"
Original Naruto (Jumping onto the scene): "Ah-ha! I have finally found you, evil doers, dattebayo!"
Darthemius (With what the fuck expression): "Wha…?"
Naruto: "Who in the orange hell are you?!"
Darthemius (With raised eyebrow): "You don't recognize him?"
Naruto: "Of course I recognize him! Orange outfit, stupid look on his face, shouting garbage… why, he is John Cena!"
Darthemius (Raising second eyebrow): "You know… there is a similarity…"
Original Naruto: "No, there isn't! I'm Uzumaki Naruto dattebayo!"
Naruto: "Wha…? Then who the fuck I am?!"
Original Naruto: "I don't know, dattebayo!"
Darthemius: "Then why the fuck are you here?!"
Original Naruto: "I'm here to stop you, dattebayo!"
Naruto: "Wait a second… You came here to stop people you don't even know?"
Original Naruto: "W-Well…"
Darthemius: "Besides, who told you we are… how did he call us?"
Naruto: "Evil doers…"
Darthemius: "Right! Who told you that?"
Original Naruto: "Well… Kishimoto-sama, dattebayo."
Darthemius: "Ah, I see… tell me then, Uzumaki Naruto… Do you know who this guy is?" (Pointing at Naruto)
Original Naruto: "Umm… He looks kind of familiar, dattebayo…"
Naruto (Rolling his eyes): "I'm you, you moron!"
Original Naruto: "Really?"
Darthemius: "Yep! He's you, if you were strong, smart, badass, stylish… well, in short words, everything you're not."
Original Naruto (Walking closer and looking up and down at Naruto): "Man, I rock!"
Naruto (Smirking): "You bet!"
Darthemius: "So you want to kill this guy?"
Original Naruto: "No! I want to be like him!"
Darthemius: "Unfortunately that's not possible."
Original Naruto: "Why not?"
Darthemius: "You see, as long as Massasi Kishimoto is your master, he won't allow this."
Original Naruto: "So, what can I do?"
Darthemius (Shrugging): "Well, I guess you can sign this." (Contract appears) "That will transfer your ownership from Kishimoto to me."
Original Naruto: "And you will be able to help me?"
Darthemius (Crossing two fingers behind his back): "Sure!"
Original Naruto: "Alright! Give me that!" (Signing the contract) "Here!"
Darthemius: "Thanks, pal!" (Snapping his fingers and watching how Original Naruto burned down to a pile of ashes) "You spared us a lot of trouble."
Naruto (Smirking): "You are evil!"
Darthemius (Smirking back): "Thank you!"
KO!
Winner: Darthemius!
Naruto: "Hey! That's second time in a row! Stop stealing my thunder!"
Darthemius (Grinning evilly): "Telletubbies!"
Naruto: "YEOW! Fucking stop that! Better say dattebayo…"
...
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaand cut!