Aaminin niyang bumilis ang tibok ng puso niya nang marinig ang sinabi nito. She was expecting it, but hearing Yohan ask her that without hesitation just made her whole being go haywire.
"Yo-Yohan . . ." nag-aalangan niyang tawag dito ngunit diretsong nakatitig lamang ang lalake sa kaniya.
"Hmm . . .?" he hummed in response, not giving her any explanation for what he said.
Dahil sa inaaksyon nito ay naiwan siya doong naguguluhan at kinakabahan. Hindi niya alam ang gagawin - or rather, alam niya pero nahihiya siyang gawin. Habang on-going ang away sa kaniyang utak ay pinapanood lamang siya nito na parang natutuwa sa paghihirap niya.
Finally, he made the first move and held her chin up towards him before stooping down and capturing her lips with his own. He sucked on her bottom lip, wrapping it like two silky pillows. Her mouth was just barely parted but it seemed to be enough for him. The scent and taste of honey with a touch of cigarettes filled her up, simultaneously sweet and bitter. He let go for a while before returning to sucking her lips again as his hand slowly ran a little through the back of her hair, slightly tugging as if he wanted more.
Yohan pulled on her bottom lip just a little bit harder before releasing his hold on her. He didn't dive back like how she was expecting him to do. Instead, with his lips, a hair's breadth away, gave her more directions. "Kiss me back."
It was so sensual, turning her on so much that she couldn't even move a muscle even if she try. She looked up at him and their eyes met. The fireworks inside her instantly set off, making her feel queasy. Without a single thought, she willed herself to get closer to Yohan and kiss him again. This time, she was the one who was gently sucking his bottom lip. She then heard him groan in praise before pulling her closer to him to make out a little more intensely with her.
His hand continued caressing her head as the other one started running up and down her back. It stimulated her beyond belief as she started pushing herself closer to him. Then she suddenly felt his tongue poking at her lips. It slipped in silently, bringing with it his warm saliva. She practically almost jumped back from the intrusion but his hand on the back of her head reassured her that it was okay. It danced inside her mouth, playfully slapping against her own tongue.
His lips and tongue melted into hers as if trying to mold them into one. She could literally feel her anxiety floating away as he continued to search the insides of her mouth. Slightly wet smacking sounds emanated from them as he would pull his tongue out, only to get a slightly better angle to stick it in deeper.
Dalang-dala na siya sa nangyayari kaya naman nabigla siya nang ang lalake mismo ang humawak sa balikat niya at unti-unti siyang nilayo dito. He let go of their kiss, both of them catching their breaths. He licked his lips, smirked at her, before going back to the bed.
Bakit tumigil bes?
Naguguluhan niya itong pinanood habang inaayos nito ang sarili upang makahiga na sa kama. Makaraan ang ilang segundo ay mukhang napansin nito na hindi pa rin siya gumagalaw sa kaniyang pwesto kaya nilingon siya nito bago nag-ika, "I'm just testing you. You know I would never forced you to have sex with me even before. Now if you really want to gain my trust again, listen to me and follow whatever I say. I'll give you a chance to explain your side when I finally want to listen."
Matapos iyon ay humiga na si Yohan at pumikit. Siya naman ay naiwan pa ring naguguluhan sa kaniyang kinatatayuan. Hindi niya pa rin alam ang gagawin kung hindi lang biglang tinapik ni Yohan ang tabi nito habang nakapikit pa rin.
Oh! He wants me to sleep next to him.
She hesitantly walked to the bed and climbed on the empty spot next to him. Yohan immediately pulled her in for a tight hug that almost crushed her. Gayunpaman ay palihim siyang napangiti bago ito niyakap pabalik.
Ganitong-ganito sila noon tuwing nag-aaway sila. They would scream at each other, she won't talk to him, he would say sorry and they would cuddle. Ang pinagkaiba nga lang ay nagkapalit na sila ni Yohan. Ito na ang hindi mamamansin at siya na ang nagsasabi ng sorry.
Somehow, she suspects that Yohan wanted her to feel what he felt before. To be in his shoes so she would learn how hard it is for him. Kung tama ang hinala niya ay willing siyang maramdaman ang lahat ng pinaramdam niya kay Yohan noon. She wanted him to see that she was indeed ready to be mature for their relationship.
She slept peacefully that night, tucked safely in the arms of the man that she truly loves.
Hindi alam ni Apple Pie kung anong dahilan ng pagkagising niya. Basta na lamang niyang naramdaman ang nakakakiliting bagay sa kaniyang may leegan. She tried removing it by pushing it away but it was so damn heavy that she just gave up eventually. Napili na lamang niyang itagilid ang sarili upang kahit papaano ay matanggal ang bigat ng bagay na iyon sa kaniya. Makakatulog na sana siya ulit nang maramdaman na naman niya ang bagay na iyon na kumikiliti sa kaniya. Wala na tuloy siyang nagawa kundi imulat ang mga mata at tignan iyon.
Noong una ay akala niya na nananaginip lamang siya. She then rubbed her tired eyes and looked clearly, and realized that it was Yohan kissing her neck. Agad namang nagsipagbalikan sa kaniya ang alaala ng nangyari kagabi.
He was giving her a chance.
"Yohan . . ." she called him in her early-morning, hoarse voice.
Unti-unting tumingin sa kaniya si Yohan at ngumiti bago nag-ika, "Sorry to wake you up so early, pero kailangan ko ng umalis. Mawawala ako ng isang linggo kaya naman gusto kong umayos ka dito. Wala akong problema kung lalabas kayo ni Xav basta ay dito ka uuwi. Do you understand me?" Her mind was still a big, giant, messy puddle but she still nodded her head like an obedient child. Upon seeing her response, he smiled again (a strange occurrence, I know) and said, "Good. Gusto ko pag-uwi ko dito ay ikaw ang agad kong nakikita."
He quickly gave her lips a kiss before getting out of the bed and walking towards his wardrobe. Siya naman ay naiwang tulala doon habang iniisip kung gaano kalayo ng narating ng pagsasamahan nila ng lalake dahil lamang sa isang gabing pagsisigawan.
After that, she remained in bed even when Yohan kissed her goodbye. Nakatulala lamang siya sa kisame habang iniisip ang lahat ng nangyari. Mukhang ilang oras rin siyang ganuon dahil kung kanina noong ginising siya ni Yohan ay madilim pa, ngayon naman ay unti-unti na niyang nasisilayan ang sinag ng araw na sumisilip sa likuran ng kurtina. Wala pa sana siyang planong bumangon dahil sa tuwa at kilig na nararamdaman, ngunit may bigla siyang narinig.
Noong una ay akala niya na guni-guni lamang niya iyon ngunit pagkaraan ng ilang minuto ay natiyak niyang may naririnig siyang mahinang tunog. Nilibot niya ang mga mata sa loob ng kwarto ni Yohan para hanapin iyon ngunit wala naman siyang makita.
Litong-lito siya kung saan ba iyon nanggagaling hanggang sa mapagawi ang kaniyang mga mata sa may bintana. Halos mapatalon na siya sa kama nang bigla niyang nakita ang isang pebble na tumama sa may bintana. She squinted her eyes at the window and was suprised when another one hits it.
May tao ba sa labas?
Naguguluhan siyang tumayo sa kama at lumapit sa bintana. Laking gulat na lamang niya nang pagdungaw niya ay ang mala-Golden Retriever na mukha ni Heneral de Castro ang nakita niya. He was beaming widely while holding a basket. Bahagya pa nga nitong tinaas iyon upang ipakita sa kaniya.
Anong ginagawa ng lalakeng ito dito? Keaga-aga ay bumibisita na ito.
She pushed aside all of her questions and started looking for a shawl to cover her thin nightgown. Magmamadali na sana siyang lumabas ngunit bigla siyang napatigil nang matandaan si Yohan.
Wala siyang hinabilin sa akin patungkol sa heneral. Maybe he thought that Heneral de Castro gave up on talking to her.
Malakas niyang pinilig ang ulo at sinabi sa sarili na wala namang sinabi si Yohan na bawal siyang makipagkausap dito. Mukhang nakalimutan nito pero at least hindi siya ang may kasalanan niyon if ever na mapagalitan siya nito.
Dahil sa napagtanto ay agad naman siyang lumabas ng kwarto at nagmamadaling bumaba ng bahay. Mabuti nga at maaga pa dahil mahihirapan siyang magpaliwanag kay Yohan kung sakaling may mga katiwalang magsumbong dito.
Upon reaching the door, she quickly gathered her skirts and run-walk towards the general, who was standing behind a big tree. Nang malapit-lapit na siya dito ay agad namang nag-bow ang lalake at binati siya.
"Magandang umaga, Binibining Christina!" Honestly, para talaga itong Golden Retriever, kulang na lang siguro ay lagyan ito ng dog ears at tails. She can even imagine his tail wagging while greeting her.
"Ma-Magandang umaga, Heneral. Kung hindi mo po masasamain . . . bakit narito po kayo ng ganito kaaga?" nag-aalangan niyang tanong dito. Ayaw niyang magtunog-maldita sa ball of sunshine na ito. Pakiramdam niya na para bang naka-commit siya ng deadly sin kung mataasan man niya ito ng kilay.
She watched as he shyly (and cutely) scratched the back of his head before handing out to her the basket that he was holding. Nagtataka siyang napalingon sa laman niyon at nakitang may iba't-ibang minatamis doon at may isang bungkos pa nga ng bulaklak. "Galing ako sa kabilang bayan at narinig kong wala daw si Ginoong Eduardo dito ngayon kaya naman nagmadali akong bumili ng maibibigay sa iyo. Kinuha ko na ang pagkakataon na bisitahin ka ngayon sapagkat alam ko namang hindi kita makakausap kung narito siya."
I swear to God, ang sarap kurutin ng pisngi ng lalakeng ito.
He was avoiding her gaze as if embarrassed by his admission that he literally was in the next town and hurriedly went back here when he heard that Yohan would be gone for a week. Kung kanina ay set na ang plano niyang pauwiin kaagad ito, ngayon naman ay nakaramdam siya ng awa at guilt kung hindi man lamang niya ito kakausapin kahit sandali lamang.
"Ahh . . . maaari po bang dito na lamang tayo mag-usap? Makikita po kasi tayo ng mga katiwala kung yayayain po kita sa loob," magalang niyang tanong habang tinuturo ang malaking ugat ng puno. Tumingin doon ang lalake at agad namang tumango-tango habang tinutulungan siyang maupo sa ugat na iyon. Mahina siyang nagpasalamat sa Diyos nang umupo sa malayo-layo ang heneral. Hindi ata kakayanin ng heart niya kung sakaling tumabi ito sa kaniya. "Uhmm . . . ano po bang nais niyong pag-usapan natin?" she meekly asked.
He looked at her as if nahihirapan itong ilabas ang sasabihin kaya naman nginitian niya ito for encouragement. "Talaga bang wala kang natatandaan?" he hopefully asked but she just nodded her head. Mas mainam na iyon ang sagot niya para wala siyang maling masabi tungkol sa buhay ni Christina. Tila ba nais niyang aluin ang heneral nang ibaba nito ang ulo dahil sa lungkot.
"Bakit po ba?" she curiously asked. "May kilala ka po bang nagngangalang Christina?" she added, wanting to probe for more information. Hindi niya alam pero baka magkakilala pala talaga sila ng heneral.
Narinig niya ang malakas na pagbuntung-hininga nito bago siya sinagot. "Oo . . . Kababata ko, ngunit matagal na kaming hindi nagkikita. Hindi ko na alam ang mukha niya ngayon ngunit tiyak akong magkamukha kayo." She can hear and see the sheer determination on the general's face, but there was also longing and . . . love?
He must really like that woman to be this persistent with her.
"Nasaan na po ba siya ngayon?" she asked again.
"Sa huling pagkakaalam ko ay nasa Europa. Tumigil ang mga liham na pinapadala namin sa isa't-isa nang lumipat siya roon. Nagkasakit kasi ang kaniyang ama kaya naman kinakailangan niyang ayusin ang mga ari-arian nito. Bata pa kami noong huli kaming nagkita kaya naman hindi na ako tiyak kung ano bang mukha niya ngayon," pagpapaliwanag nito na kaniya namang tinanguhan.
"Kung hindi mo po masasamain . . . ano po bang buong pangalan niya?" curious niyang tanong.
General de Castro looked into her eyes and said, "Christina Zaldua."
There and then, she realized . . . it was her. He was talking about her.
Christina Zaldua. That was her full name.
Gusto niyang matuwa dahil sa wakas ay may vital information na siyang nalaman tungkol sa pagkatao ni Christina, ngunit makaraan ang ilang sandali ay may na-realize siya. If she was a Zaldua . . . then that only means that it was her own family who wanted her killed. She was running away from her own family.
But why?