A week later...
Tuesday | 8:09 p.m.
November 29, 2016
Antoinette Mackey
"Well well well, look at you two all tucked away in the corner..." My uncle Elridge approached our table with a glass of white wine in his hand. Shiloh sat with one arm thrown around my shoulder and a glass of wine in his free hand as he stared up at my uncle. "Shiloh, you look decent tonight, son. It's nice to see you out of those street clothes for once."
"Uncle Elridge..." I said through clenched teeth. It was my parents' 34th wedding anniversary tonight, and Shiloh and I played the perfect married couple that they thought we were.
"Nah. Nah, it's cool, babe." Shiloh chuckled before taking a swig of wine.
Lord, I prayed he didn't curse my uncle out. Every time they saw one another at a family gathering, they played the dozens insulting one another. My uncle Elridge considered me his favorite niece, so he was a bit protective of me. He'd always told me that he saw me marrying a decent, clean-cut man and not someone from the hood who didn't know how to carry himself as a respectable man and not a street thug. He tolerated Shiloh, but it was no secret that he didn't care much for him. My mother and father, on the other hand, loved everything about him. We'd been best friends since we were kids, so he was always over our house with at least one of my parents home, of course.
"You've been shopping in Pops closet again, I see.." Shiloh smirked. My uncle was a tacky dresser, and Shiloh never failed to let him know it. He always said that he dressed like Pops from "The Wayans Bros" but that Pops had better taste than my uncle. Whenever Shiloh mentioned it, that always seemed to shut uncle Elridge up. His nose twitched as he stared Shiloh down, whose smirk turned into a full-blown smile before he tossed the rest of his wine back.
"Anyway..." Uncle Elridge cleared his throat, looking at me. "I just wanted to say you decorated this place beautifully for Rita and Richard. Just look at them." He said as we looked over at them. All eyes were on them as they danced in the middle of the room to Mel Waiter's "Got My Whiskey".
The one thing my parents knew how to do was shut down a dance floor. They didn't care where they were or what type of people they were around. They were themselves, regardless of who was watching. I remember hoping and wishing to have something as solid as them. Marrying Shiloh, I thought for sure that we'd have an everlasting marriage. We'd been friends for so long that I thought that things would get even better. I'd been a fool. Now here I was sitting here tonight with him as if everything was okay between us. The truth behind it all was something I'd never tell my family and even my friends. It was humiliating.
I didn't know what was going on with Shiloh, but for the last week now he hadn't snapped at me, hit me, tried to force himself on me, etc. He was home at night, cooking, doing more for Shyanne like getting up in the middle of the night instead of letting me do it every single time, he'd ask me if I was in the mood for sex and if my answer was no he'd respect that. Honestly, I was more terrified than I'd been when he was beating my ass. What the hell was he up to? Was he trying to get me to let my guard down? Had he done something illegal that he wanted me to keep a secret again? I didn't understand this man at all.
"Well, it wasn't all me. Shy paid for it all and even helped cousin Myra and I decorate." I placed my hand on top of Shiloh's. He looked at me in confusion for just a second before looking at my uncle and cracking a smile. I was pretty sure that gesture had caught him off guard, but if we wanted people to think we were happily married, I was willing to sit here and pretend not to be disgusted with him. Knowing he'd been cheating on me, I never wanted to have sex with him. I always turned it down. However, he'd been right about one thing, though. I did still love him. However, loving him didn't mean that I could forget anything he'd done, any lie he'd told, any blow he'd thrown. I remembered it all.
"I'm sorry, but what is it that you do again, son?" Uncle Elridge raised an eyebrow at Shiloh.
"Babe let's dance..." I stood up, taking Shiloh by the hand, pulling him to the dance floor as the next song came on, and family members started to get up from their seats to take their places on the floor. I placed my arms around Shiloh's neck as he placed his hands on my waist, and we slow danced to Avant and KeKe Wyatt's "My First Love".
I avoided eye contact with him but feeling him wrap his arms around my back pulling me into him, I looked up.
"What are you doing?" I asked.
"You really are my first love, Ann."
I sucked my teeth and inadvertently rolled my eyes. I wasn't buying that shit. He'd lied so much, why should I let my guard down and believe this when he was just sooo ecstatic to tell me over a month ago that he wasn't in love with me?
"You don't believe it?" He questioned as I looked off to the side. Keeping one arm wrapped around my back, he took his free hand and made me look at him. "It's easy for me to say I'm not in love because I've never been in love with any woman. You've always wondered why my past relationships ended. I guess I just like toxic women who trigger me. I have a temper, and my temper can sometimes cause me to get physical. My past relationships were all about fucking and fighting. It was about lust, not love."
"Is that why you cheat?" I frowned.
"I'm trying to be honest, Ann. I'm a 30-year-old grown-ass man who's just now realizing what he has in front of him. I'm a 30-year-old man purposely sabotaging what he has because he's terrified of being in love and admitting it. Shit makes me feel like a weak ass nigga."
"You don't love me Shy, so let's just cut the bull—"
"You remember when you were dating that Eric nigga? The one you were crazy about and could see yourself marrying and having kids with?"
"The one who cheated?"
"Ol' boy definitely was innocent. I sabotaged that shit. Don't ask me why. I just couldn't let you tie the knot. I don't know, man. It's hard to explain but even harder to admit when you're in love with someone. I've always told you that "I love you". The truth is I've always meant it in a friend way but to be in love? Loving and being in love with someone are two different things. I'm just now accepting both." He said.
Omniscient
The music stopped and Antoinette took a step back from him and everyone started to mingle among one another laughing, drinking, and piling up their plates. There stood Shiloh and Antoinette, still locking eyes. No matter what he said, she always questioned what was real and what was fake.
"You don't believe that either?"
"I don't." She shrugged.
Exhaling he said, "What do I have to do to make it all up to you? Hm?" He grabbed her hand, intertwining their fingers.
There was nothing that could erase what he'd done, but since he wanted to be put to work she figured she'd make him worship the ground she walked on.
"You know...I've been wanting a new car, but I've been unsuccessful in getting one since I don't have access to our money. It...it's unfortunate." She said looking down.
A smirk formed on Shiloh's face because he knew what she was doing. "A car, huh?" He pulled at his chin hair.
"I mean nothing too fancy or anything." She shrugged.
"Mhm. When would you like to go look at this car?" He asked.
"You told me you were gonna hang out with the guys for a bit Saturday, but...maybe when you get back?"
"Done. Anything else you want?" Shiloh chuckled but was interrupted when Antoinette's cousin Dominic approached them.
"Aye cousin there's a woman outside looking for you. She said she had something for aunt Rita and uncle Richard. I told her I'd make sure they got it, but she wanted to give it to you herself. She said her name was Charlamagne or some shit." Dominic shrugged.
"Thanks, cousin," Antoinette said, making her way through the crowd of people and out the building. Of course, Shiloh followed behind her because he didn't know why Charmaine had popped up. Antoinette's parents lived three hours away, and for her to drive here was suspicious to him. For the last week he'd been blowing her up to do the pregnancy test, and she'd been avoiding him. Now all of a sudden, she was here? What game was she playing to pop up out of all nights?
As they walked outside, there stood Charmaine posted up.
"Friend!" Antoinette said, pulling her in for a hug. "What are you doing here?"
"Girl, you know I love your mom and dad like my own. You and Shi-loh..." She raised her brows, saying his name with so much emphasis as she shot him a look. "...left the city so quick that Karla and I didn't get a chance to give you our gift to give to them. Since she's looking after Shyanne tonight, I told her that I'd make the ultimate sacrifice and drive on down here and deliver it."
Standing behind Antoinette, Shiloh was calling Charmaine every name in the book as he cussed her out. He wanted to say it out loud, but he could only mouth it. A sly smile appeared on Charmaine's face. It was a game to her because she knew as long as Antoinette was here he couldn't do anything.
"Aw, well, that was sweet of you. I feel terrible that you had to drive this long way, and I'd hate to send you back so quickly. You should come inside and have a drink and a meal. Hang out with us. Mom and dad will be happy to see you."
"For real?" Charmaine smiled, placing her hand over her heart.
"Nah baby. I mean, it's family only. Don't you think they'd mind?" Shiloh quickly butted in.
"It's fine Shiloh." Antoinette turned to look at him. "Stop acting like that." She mouthed. In her mind, she figured he was still keeping her friends at arm's length to avoid them knowing what was going on behind closed doors. Truth be told, he didn't want her to find out that he was much closer to her friend than she thought.
"Okay. I'll stay but can Shiloh get the box from the car? It's heavy and fragile." Charmaine smirked, walking towards her car, opening the back door.
"Sure. I'll let my folks know you're here." An oblivious Antoinette said.
"Let them know I'll have something to eat but hold the drinks, will you? I have to look out for my baby." She placed her hand on her stomach.
"What?! Shut up!" Antoinette ran towards her with open arms and pure excitement written all over her face as she squeezed Charmaine, who hugged her back. Shiloh stood there, clenching his jaw as he and Charmaine locked eyes. "Omg, when did you find out? How far along are you? No. No. Who's the father?"
"Ann..." Charmaine laughed. "Breathe girl. We'll talk, I promise. Right now, let's go in and celebrate your folks."
"I can't wait. Shyanne will have someone to play with, and I'm gonna be an auntie." Ann walked away, trying to keep calm as she headed back inside the building.
"What the fuck kind of game are you playing?" Shiloh snatched Charmaine's arm.
"Ann!" She called.
"I haven't heard from you in a week, and then you pop up and continue this lie about being pregnant. Do you know who the fuck you're playing with? I'll murder your ass." He said through clenched teeth. It was taking everything in him not to hit her.
"I'm playing with my child's father." She took her free hand and pulled the pregnancy test out of her pocket. A test that read positive. "And to be clear, this is the new test I took before driving here. ANN!" She yelled again. Shiloh quickly let her go and grabbed the box out of the car.
"Stupid bitch." He mumbled, walking around Charmaine.
"I love you too, daddy."