First day of senior year meant one thing: Ellen was going to cry in the kitchen. My theory was proven correct when I walked downstairs and as soon as she saw me, tears rolled down my mom's cheeks.
"Mother, simmer." I said, rolling my eyes slightly at her.
"My baby is starting his senior year. I'm allowed to be emotional." She replied, wiping at her eyes. Luke happened to be sitting in the kitchen as well, and her words definitely caught his attention.
"Oh I forgot, I'm just a fucking hallucination?!" Luke added dramatically.
"Luke! Language!" She scolded, shaking a finger at him. "And of course you're not a hallucination, it's just-"
"Jack. Precious precious Jack, who can never do anything wrong. Even when he does ALL OF THE THINGS WRONG!" He vented, slamming his hands on the counter. He took a deep breath, collecting himself as Alex walked into the kitchen. "I'm done. I'm calm. Good morning Alexander."
"Good morning... Lucas?" Alex said, unsure of how to greet Luke in this moment. After a quick breakfast and a few forced photos on the porch and a FaceTime call to Alex's parents, the three of us loaded into our separate cars.
"Why won't you just ride with us?" Luke asked as Alex unlocked his own car.
"Because Jack is a douchebag driver and I don't intend on meeting an untimely death in the state of Michigan." He explained in a deadpan voice, opening his door. I flipped him off as I did the same, and Luke slid into the passenger seat. He reached for aux and I immediately snatched it out of his hands.
"Fuck no." I said bluntly, scrolling through my playlist for a specific song. I clicked "Fireproof" by One Direction with my thumb, causing Luke to turn to face me with raised eyebrows.
"One Direction? Not that I'm hating, because I fuck with One Direction heavy, but it's not your usual vibe." He questioned, staring at me for a moment before recollection flashed in his eyes. "Ah, but we do know who fucks with One Direction heavy."
"Don't." I said, knowing exactly where this was going.
"Elena!! And if you're listening to her music, you know what that means. You're down bad." He cheered, and I reached across the front seat to smack him. He winced, rubbing his arm. "Dude? Relax. Getting defensive just proves my point.
"Leave it alone Dukes. I'm serious." I said, trying desperately to change the topic.
"Whatever. Once again, just proving my point here." He turned to look out the window, letting the music take over the car.
He was right. I listened to her music to find more things in common with her because I wanted to find things to talk about. And it's stupid as fuck and I would never admit it to a single person, not even her, but listening to songs I know she likes makes me feel closer to her. And that's all I want to be: close to Elena Cameron.
We pulled into the familiar parking lot of our high school and I found my usual spot, hopping out of the car to see the Beecher twins. However, Caroline only acknowledged my brother, leaving me standing there alone and off to the side awkwardly. As they chitchatted, a blonde girl I knew too well walked by and offered me a fake smile.
"Hi Jack!" It was Chelsea Comar, my sort of girlfriend from the year before. We were never really anything, and it was a period of my life I never really wanted to revisit.
"Hi Chelsea." I offered a weak wave, turning to the twins and Luke to get her to go away.
"Hi guys, remember me? Jack?" I said, crossing my arms.
"Hi Rowdy." Johnny saluted. "Ready to get in there and see how your pranks are doing?"
"Thank you. Yes, I am." I said proudly, nodding my head before scanning the parking lot. A few of our other friends had pulled into the lot: Alex, Cole, Case, Dom, Boldy and Trevor. They were all heading over towards our cars, laughing and being absolutely obnoxious per usual. "Wait, where's Elena?" I asked, realizing I had parked next to her empty spot. Luke laughed under his breath and I thrust my elbow into his ribs. I shot him a knowing look that said "Shut your fucking mouth." He seemed to get the hint and closed his mouth, tugging on his backpack straps.
"Come on, it's Elena. We'll be lucky if she gets here by fourth period." Cole joked as he walked up, dapping up Johnny through the window. However my day got significantly better as a white Jeep Wrangler flew up the side of the parking lot, with "Stockholm Syndrome" by One Direction blaring through the window carrying the only person I really wanted to see that day, Elena herself. I couldn't even hide the smile that spread across my face as I spotted her through the driver's side window, even though she looked so unhappy to be there and bore not much emotion. However as she stepped out and joined the group, I caught her eye to offer her a smile. It wasn't even really intentional, I just was always a grinning idiot when I was in her presence. I think I felt my heart stop and reboot when she smiled back, her first sign of life all day. I genuinely didn't clock a word that was being said in the parking lot besides "Ziggy" and I was just stealing glances at a certain brunette girl and attempting to ignore Luke's giggles as he picked up on it too. The only thing I retained was Elena commanding us all to go inside and see the aftermath of our senior pranks so naturally we all headed towards the large building. Our miniature herd was on the move, and I found myself near her again. Again, not on purpose. I just was pulled into her gravity like she was the sun and I was Earth.
"I'm impressed." I worked up my courage, but meaning every word I was about to say.
"How so?" She asked.
"You drove here." I stated, referencing the keys in her hand.
"Oh, yeah. I did." Elena answered me, looking down at the keys she was clutching with intensity she seemingly hadn't noticed.
"And a drive thru? Look at you! I knew you'd be good." I smiled. I meant it. I knew Elena was a nervous driver, everyone did. She hated it more than anyone I had ever met. She was, in her own words, a licensed passenger princess. But I knew how hard she had been trying to practice and gain confidence, and she had done it. She drove herself the night before too, and had braved her phobia of drive thrus. These were big steps for her, and I thought she should know that someone noticed it.
"Thanks Rowdy, I guess you were right. For once." She joked, making me laugh.
"Hey! I've definitely been right about... things. Like more than once?" I said, but I knew I was just flat out wrong. I'm never right about anything. Except for the fact that I think Elena Cameron is the prettiest girl on the planet, but she didn't know about that.
"Face it. I'm always right, and you'll always shoot left." I laughed out loud, impressed that she even knew such a small detail about me. Elena liked to watch hockey and was learning, but that was something she would've really had to pay attention to notice, and I just can't imagine her paying that close of attention to me.
"Whatever you say Madame President."
We all headed inside, and PCEP had descended into chaos. There were chickens just milling around in the main lobby, and we all knew there were some lingering in the academic hallways. The gym was a full on beach, with students "laying out" and dipping their feet into the kiddie pools instead of heading to homeroom. I was so proud. All of my weeks of planning had paid off as I watched a freshmen get chased by a chicken.
"How ya feeling?" Dom shook my shoulders.
"Fucking amazing." I said as we navigated through the wild scene of our high school, passing by a group of pissed off football players because of the thousands of plastic forks that had been dumped all over their field. This might've been the highlight. We split off on our separate ways for homeroom, which left me and Dom heading off to our homeroom. I glanced over my shoulder to wave a subtle goodbye to Elena, already counting down the seconds until English class first period. I gave her a quick wink, she just looked so good I couldn't resist it.
"You're fucking nasty." Dom said, shaking his head at me before grabbing my backpack and pulling me down the hallway.
Homeroom was uneventful, just bullshitting with Dom and being the reason Mrs. Grimwald might consider retirement. As soon as the bell rang I was out of my seat, moving through the hallways rapidly to get to my English class. It was me, Caroline, Johnny, and Elena against the English language. We migrated to the back of the room immediately.
"You guys, there." Johnny ordered the girls, pointing intensely at the two seats directly in front of us.
"Is this so you can cheat off of me?" Caroline asked him, cocking an eyebrow.
"Of course it is. Don't be ridiculous." He said, grabbing at her backpack so she would sit down.
"You too? Be honest." Elena said to me, tilting her head at me. Jesus Christ. Does she even know what she's doing to me?
"Come on Elena, you know like... every word in the English language. I know like... 50% of them. I need help." I said, shrugging my shoulders. She knew I was right, and class went by a lot faster knowing she was there.
To be honest, school was never really my thing. My classes practically blended together, I was just there. Math however, was probably the class I dreaded the most. I did worse in math than any of my other classes and Mrs. Kelly was not sparing me as she started lecturing on some weird shit about limits, which I'm pretty sure was a thing in "Mean Girls." I was sitting next to Cole, who irritatingly seemed to be understanding it to at least a better level than I was. I reached into my pocket and grabbed my phone to reach out to my lifeline.
New Message to Elena Cameron
Jack
how good at math are you on a scale of 1-10
Elena
what?
Jack
like relatively, how good are you at math
Elena
maybe a 10?
does that sound cocky?
Jack
cocky is a good thing elena gilbert
but thank god i haven't understand a fucking thing mr kelly said since i sat down
Elena
you're hopeless captain
Jack
maybe but you're not
you're my only hope
Elena Cameron loved "you're my only hope"
Even over text she still made me nervous. I could've asked Cole for help, he seems to be getting it and he's actually in the class. But she just makes everything feel easy, and this was another excuse to talk to her and be around her more than the other guys. As the bell rang, I walked out with Cole as we were both headed to our godforsaken AP Biology class. Fuck AP Bio. I should not be taking AP Bio. But here I was, about to tackle the mitochondria or something. Even though I was dreading the actual class, once again, Elena would be there. I must've been smiling because Cole started one of his typical Cole games.
"Jeopardy time: What's Rowdy thinking about?" He said dramatically. I rolled my eyes as he started singing an obnoxious rendition of the Jeopardy theme music. He stopped abruptly, having some sort of lightbulb moment. "Who is... Elena Cameron?"
"Cole shut the fuck up." I said, feeling my cheeks heat up as he called me out.
"Oh that's rude. I will not be silenced. You're thinking about her. You like her." He taunted, poking me in the arm.
"Please. Can we not do this right now." I pleaded, shoving him away. I'm not the person who talks about their feelings easily. I don't know how to do stuff like this.
"It's okay Jack. Relax. I get it. She's Elena. You're Jack. We all know." He said, causing my jaw to drop.
"What do you mean you all know? Fucking know what?" I questioned, nervousness creeping up into my chest as we approached the classroom.
"Figure it out." He said, waving his fingers mystically. The conversation was cut short as we were greeted with a few of our friends. We were bullshitting in the hallway to pass time, when I heard a familiar laugh a few doors down. I looked up to see Elena, who was waving at a boy who slipped into a classroom. It was Finn Reilly, the football player Finn Reilly. My jaw went tight before I even knew what was happening, and I couldn't stop staring at Finn until he was out of my sight. Why were they together? What did he say to make her laugh? Why did he get to make her laugh? I could feel a fire in my stomach, but it was extinguished when I looked up to see her smiling at us. Me.
"You gentlemen ready to learn about the wonders of life? Be honest." She teased, leaning against the lockers and pulling out her Extra spearmint gum. None of us spoke regarding our impending doom, something that Little Miss Straight A's could never understand. "Jesus Christ, loosen up. You guys will be fine, relax." Once again, her gravity was so strong, I found myself leaned up against the lockers and racking my brain for any excuse to talk to her. So I reached my hand out, mentally kicking my own ass as she stared at me confusedly.
"Hit me for good luck." I said, coming back to some kind of conciousness. She laughed and handed me a piece, and I swear my hand caught on fire as I felt her fingertips brush against my palm.
"Here you go Rowdy, let's hope it raises your IQ by a couple points." She smiled. Caroline approached the group, a huge smile on her face too. We begrudgingly headed into class now that we were a full group, and I was shitting my pants.
"You're fine, Jack. It won't be that bad." Elena said to me, bringing me out of my trance.
"Easy for you to say. You're the smartest person I know." I replied, honestly meaning it.
"Really? Me?" She answered, shock in her voice. It boggled my mind how humble she could be. On the outside, she was the confident Class President with a perfect 4.0. But around us, you could tell she didn't think she was anything too special. If only she knew I thought she was the most amazing person I'd ever met.
"Of course, Elena. It'll always be you." I said, but panicked that I took it too far. "Even though you're always gonna be my Second in Command." I laughed, causing her to laugh too.Mrs. Finch's speech was daunting, and upon hearing I got to choose my own lab partner, I knew who I was going after.
As soon as Mrs. Finch was done talking, Trevor grabbed onto Caroline. "I call Carrie!" He said, and I wasted no time.
"I call dibs on Elena!" I screamed, pulling her towards me so fast. I realized in passing how much I liked the feeling of her hand.
"Woah! Woah! Why do you two get the girls?" Cole said, pointing between both of the pairs.
"We aren't the passenger seat in your mom's minivan. You can't call us." Caroline said.
"We just did." Trevor and I said in a perfectly synchronized manner.
"I need Elena. Have you met me?" I said, and honestly, everyone agreed. I dragged Elena to a table towards the back of the room.
"Well that was fast." She teased, sitting down in a seat and turning to watch the Johnny vs. Trevor Rock, Paper, Scissors tournament over Caroline. "Five bucks on Trevor?"
"Johnny is determined. Look at that fire in his eyes. You're on." I replied, holding my hand out to shake it. It was more or less and excuse to hold her hand again, but it solidified our deal.
We watched intensely, and when Trevor threw his winning hand she rejoiced. "HA!"
"Fuck!" I moaned, reaching into my backpack to grab my wallet.
"You don't actually have to do that." She said.
"I'm a man of my word Elena Gilbert." I replied, pulling out a five dollar bill. "And with all the help you're gonna give me in bio, and math, I owe you." I forced the five dollar bill into my hand, which was another opportunity to touch her hand. And a chance to make her laugh, and I succeeded on both fronts.
"Alright. Looking forward to that help you're requesting." She said, as Mrs. Finch instructed us on some discussion questions in the book. Her comment somehow made me feel warm. The thought that she liked spending time with me too was enough to get me through this class. She pulled out the textbook and flipped to the assigned pages, and I simply just watched in horror. The reading sounded like another language.
"Nope. No shot you're understanding this right now." I declared, gesturing at her book.
"I am in fact understanding it. It's lipids." She said, and I stared at her blankly. "They're a fatty acid. In like peanut butter and canola oil and shit. They store energy, help build cell membranes, and are like signaling molecules."She continued, and it started to make the slightest bit more sense, but nothing I could comprehend.
"I'm so fucked. Absolutely and completely fucked." I complained, realizing just how behind I was in this class.
"No. You're not. Listen. I, Elena Belle Cameron, will not let you fail this class. Okay?" She had faith in me. People had faith in me when it came to hockey, but not really school. But she did, and I couldn't help but smile and nod. "Let's try this again."
She spent the period explaining everything from the chapter to him, and an hour had never gone so fast in my life. I sat there just listening to her talk, she was so hot when she was confident in what she was saying. I never wanted to leave, but the bell pulled us apart.
"You're incredible." I said, holding the door open for her as we made out way out into the hallway.
"Incredible? That might be a stretch." She replied laughing.
"No. You're incredible. How do you do that? How do you say things, things that make zero sense to me, in a way that I can completely understand? How do you get me like that?" I asked, confused as to how she could know just how to talk to me and the way to explain things so I could follow.
"I don't know, I guess we just do that? I mean, nobody else would've been able to build a beach with me?"
"Nobody. Especially not Cole, he'll never be ready for war." I laughed, glancing over towards the shorter boy who was fighting to keep pace with Case who towered over him.
"I guess not." She said.
"Looks like you're stuck with me, forever." I said boldly, and she smiled in response. That smile would be the death of me.
The rest of the day was honestly a blur of World History and Latin class. As the final bell rang, I bounded down to the science hallway a few halls over to catch Elena on her way out to the parking lot.
"Hey." I smiled at her as she came out of the classroom, catching her off guard.
"Oh, hey? What are you doing over here?" She asked.
"I was in the language hallway, figured I would come see how Medical Career Foundations went." We all had each other's schedules in the group chat, so I hoped to God she didn't think it was weird I still remembered what class she was in.
"It was good, a chill period with Caroline. Nothing too crazy." She smiled.
"Where is Care?" I said, realizing her other half was nowhere in sight.
"She went to the bathroom the last few minutes, she was bored. I told her I'd meet her outside." Elena giggled, rolling her eyes playfully at her friend. "How was Latin?"
She remembered my schedule? I felt my cheeks warm up a little but turned my head to cough to attempt to cover it up. "Good. Boring. Lot of writing."
"Why the fuck do you even take Latin?" She asked with a laugh.
"I don't have to speak. It's only written. So I have a better shot at passing." I said, being deadass.
"Jesus Christ." She laughed again, covering her hand with her mouth. Her laugh was so infectious I couldn't help but laugh back. "So, are you getting excited for your first game? It's in like, two weeks? Or three?"
"Meh." I said, shrugging my shoulders.
"Meh? What the fuck is that?" Elena asked with furrowed brows, grabbing my arm to get my attention.
"Our last practice was ass. Case and Pat are behind on the power play, we can't make anything happen yet. We scrimmaged with the 16's, and Luke scored on Cam. My fucking brother. I can't decide who to start in goal because they were both letting bullshit in. Every puck was like a fucking knuckle puck to them." I ranted, citing one of my favorite movies of all time, "D2: The Mighty Ducks"
"Okay, knuckle puck?" She asked, her head tilted in confusion.
"What? You've never seen Mighty Ducks?" I asked, my jaw dropping.
"I've seen it, of course I've seen it. But there is no mention of a 'knuckle puck' in that movie."
"The second one? It's a whole plot line Elena." I shook my head at her.
"There's a sequel? I always thought it was just the one." I looked at her dumbfounded. "Blame Care! She only showed me the first one in middle school." Her hands were up in the air in surrender, which made me laugh. "What's it about?"
This girl knows the way to my heart. "So it picks up after Coach spends some time in the minors, but has to leave it behind. He comes back to coach the Ducks again, but at the Junior Goodwill Games."
"Is that like World Juniors?" She asked, to which I nodded.
"Yeah. They're just younger. And they get some new teammates and have to learn how to work together with them and Coach has to get reconnected with the spirit of the Ducks instead of getting caught up in the sponsorships and shit."
"This sounds fucking amazing. We have to watch it. Math, Bio, and Mighty Ducks. Deal?"
"Deal." I smiled, internally losing my shit because she had just initiated some kind of plans with me. We had arrived at the parking lot at this point, and there was a shift in her demeanor for sure at the sight of her car.
"I think that me driving should be illegal. I fucking hate it." She complained, leaning her head up towards the sky.
"Lains, you'll be fine." Care said from the inside of Johnny's truck.
"Go on Elena Gilbert. You're good." Trevor yelled out the window to her and she turned to face him to grimace before sliding into the driver seat.
"Have a lovely practice gentlemen." Elena waved, picking up her phone but not turning on her car yet. She proceeded to scroll through her phone, not moving an inch. She looked up to see us all staring at her, waiting for her to pull away. "I'm waiting for the parking lot to clear out. Move along."
I couldn't help but laugh at her as I headed into my car, waving goodbye at her.
"See you tomorrow, Elena." I said through my open window.
She glanced up to look at me, releasing her bottom lip from her teeth. Elena chewed on her bottom lip when she was nervous, I noticed that.
"Bye Jack." She smiled weakly, clearly uncomfortable in the car.
"Relax. Text me when you get home, okay?" I said, wanting to make sure that the most nervous driver in Plymouth Michigan got home safely. She nodded and I pulled away, and Luke wasted no time.
"Text me when you get home, okay?" He mocked me, over exaggerating the words.
I reached across the front seat to cover his mouth with my one hand as I continued to steer with the other. "Shut. The. Fuck. Up." I held my hand there for a minute until he was quiet again, dropping him off at home and heading off to practice. I was halfway to the arena when my phone buzzed on the passenger seat. As I approached a red light I reached down to check the notification.
New Message from Elena Cameron
Elena
i'm home :)
Jack
knew you had it in you
Elena
have a good practice captain
hope u have some knuckle pucks today
Jack loved "hope u have some knuckle pucks today"
I couldn't stop reading the messages, and was only pulled back to reality by the honk of a horn behind me to inform me the light had turned green. I sped through the light, a smile on my face as I skipped to the next song in my queue, "Clouds" by One Direction.
All the sudden it felt like she was in the passenger seat, her rightful place.