Harry felt the blood drain from his face even as he saw Snape's eyes widening in utter shock. "What?" the Potion Master asked, looking from Dumbledore to McGonagall to Hooch. To Harry's horror McGonagall and Hooch both gave him a sickly nodded of confirmation.
"Snape!" Ron exclaimed in dismay.
"But that's impossible!" Harry protested, looking at them as if they'd lost their minds. Molly and Arthur didn't look particularly happy, but they didn't look nearly as upset as Harry though they should have.
Dumbledore frowned at Harry. "Why would it be impossible? I realize you and Professor Snape don't get along very well, but that's often the case in these situations. You'll get past that eventually. It's an excellent match. You are both relatively equal in power and ability - or will be once you've finished your schooling Harry. And until you do, Severus is certainly capable of protecting you from any threat. And you have more in common than you realize, and-"
"But he's a man!" Harry interrupted, wondering if the Headmaster had completely lost his mind.
Dumbledore looked a bit baffled by his comment. Hermione leaned toward Harry. "That's a Muggle prejudice, Harry," she whispered to him. "It doesn't really translate in the Wizarding World - Wizarding bond marriages are legal between two consenting adults of any gender or species."
"Really?' Harry turned to stare at her in surprise. He'd never really thought about it on a personal level, had no deep prejudice himself against homosexuality though he couldn't recall any situation where he could have formed an opinion one way or another. But that the Wizarding World had no prejudice against. . ."Species!" he exclaimed suddenly realizing what else she had implied in that statement.
"Didn't you ever wonder where centaurs came from?" she asked with a shrug. "Under those circumstances, very few matches shock the Wizarding World."
"I am not marrying Potter!" Snape announced before Harry could reply further.
"Now, Severus," Dumbledore argued. "It's a good match. And it solves all sorts of problems, the first being that the odds of finding someone else suitable between now and tomorrow morning is highly unlikely."
"Good match!" Snape growled. "Apart from the fact that we can't stand each other, have you forgotten my OTHER job description?"
Harry almost jumped up and echoed Snape's words right there. That was absolutely right! Snape couldn't marry Harry and be a spy at the same time. It would be an absolute proclamation of his loyalties if he did so. He managed, however, to restrain himself, certain that Snape would not welcome his help in any way.
"Granted you can't possibly maintain your fiction as a loyal Death Eater," Dumbledore agreed amiably. "But I've been meaning to talk to you about that any way Severus. It's grown far too dangerous. If Voldemort hadn't sent you and Lucius away on that little wild goose chase I dreamed up last spring, you'd would have been killed along with the others in the battle."
Harry's eyes widened at that. He hadn't even thought of wondering how it was that Snape had managed to both remain a believable spy and keep himself out of the battle. He shivered suddenly at the realization that along with the loyal Death Eaters he might very well have been responsible for the death of Professor Snape last spring. And while he didn't like Snape, he had to admit he admired the man's courage and bravery, not to mention his unswerving loyalty to Dumbledore despite the hellish life he must live as a spy.
"No," Dumbledore said firmly. "It's time to pull you in from the field, Severus. We need you here, with us. And this way we'll be certain of having a loyal member of the Order at Harry's side to protect him."
"Albus!" Snape protested in horrified shock.
Dumbledore rose suddenly, taking hold of Snape's arm and leading him off to the side of the room to speak with him quietly. Ron and Hermione took the opportunity to speak with Harry in quite whispers.
"This is insane," Ron protested. "They can't be seriously considering marrying you to that greasy git!"
Somewhat panic stricken, Harry looked up at them in desperation. What in hell was he going to do? It seemed a matter of who got to kill him first - if he didn't marry Snape Voldemort would kill him. If he did marry him, Snape would probably kill him himself. Not to mention what the other Gryffindors and Slytherin would do. He'd never really thought seriously about marriage, but he always assumed that if he survived to adulthood, he would fall in love like his parents had, get married, raise a family. Rather liked the idea actually. But to spend the rest of his life trapped in the company of Severus Snape, most hated teacher in Hogwarts. It would be like one endless potions class for the rest of his life.
"Harry, we can't allow this," Hermione agreed, looking somewhat resignedly over at Ron.
Ron, looking pale and sick, nodded in agreement. "Right you are," he said firmly. "We're your best friends, Harry. Either one of us. . ." his voice broke momentarily and he cleared it quickly. "Either one of us will marry you before we let you marry, Snape."
It took a moment for Harry to understand what his friend was saying, mostly because he still hadn't quite gotten over the shock of learning that the Wizarding World didn't apparently have any prejudice at all against two men marrying each other. It sunk in finally that both his friends were willing to marry him, were willing to sacrifice their own possibility for future happiness to protect him. And while he desperately wanted an out - someway to avoid a marriage to Snape, he knew in his heart that he could never do that to his friends.
Truth was, no matter how he looked at it, his life and his happiness had never been his own. From the moment Voldemort had killed his family and turned him into the Boy Who Lived, his life had been completely out of his control. He'd always been denied choices - first with the Dursleys and then with the Wizarding World and the belief that he was going to save them. Actually doing just that, saving them last spring had only reinforced that belief. And no matter what else he did in life, what else he might hope or dream, Voldemort was never going to let him live a normal existence. Like as not Voldemort wasn't going to let him live period. At least he could ensure that his friends still had a chance at a normal life.
"You are my best friends," he told Ron and Hermione quietly. "And if I'm to face what ever is to come with Voldemort, I need my best friends beside me - as my best friends. I can't marry either of you. It would ruin everything between us."
"Harry," Hermione protested. "We would never allow it to ruin anything."
"She's right, mate," Ron agreed. "We'll always be your best friends. No matter what happens."
Seemed he needed something more persuasive. He caught both of their hands. "You two are the only things in my life that are normal and sane," he told them fiercely. "I can't lose that. And marrying one of you would change that. I can't."
They both seemed to understand and he saw the looks of mingled relief and guilt in their eyes. "But Snape," Ron protested one last time. "What about. . .Ginny? I'm sure she'd. . ."
"She won't be fifteen for another month yet," Hermione reminded him. "It will be too late by then."
"Besides," Harry admitted. "Marrying Ginny would be like marrying my LITTLE SISTER. I couldn't do that either." He was well aware of the fact that Ginny had a crush on him. Adding the whole crush thing into an arranged marriage would be a recipe for disaster as far as he was concern. At least one thing was certain - there would never exist any misunderstandings like that between him and Snape. He glanced across the room at Snape who was still locked in a heated argument with the Headmaster. Snape looked angrier than he'd ever seen him and he sighed in despair.
Molly and Arthur, having moved aside to allow the three of them to speak quietly together, rejoined them. "Everything okay, Harry dear?" Molly asked in concern.
"Mom, this is just awful!" Ron protested. "We can't allow Harry to marry Snape."
Molly frowned thoughtfully. "I know you don't like Professor Snape," Molly agreed. "But the Headmaster is right when he says this solves a lot of problems. Severus Snape comes from a very respected, very old and wealthy Wizarding family. Truth is if we did find some nice sweet young girl for Harry to marry, odds are Minister Fudge would find a way to declare the marriage null and proceed with the adoption anyway. There are very few families with standing enough to get away with something like this. I thought maybe Bill or Charlie perhaps, but we just don't have the money or standing to face down Fudge. But he absolutely will not attempt to cross Severus. He'd know he'd lose that battle."
"You make it sound like you actually think that Snape will agree to this?" Ron exclaimed. "Or that if he did, he'd go out of his way to protect Harry. You don't know him like we do."
"I'm certain Severus will agree to it," Arthur corrected. "Albus Dumbledore is nothing if not persuasive. And yes, Severus will protect Harry. If he marries Harry he'd be honor-bound to protect him."
"If he doesn't kill him first," Ron protested.
"He's never tried to kill me," Harry admitted quietly to his friend. He couldn't believe he was actually defending Snape, but the man had risked his own life several times to save Harry. And God knew he risked his life time and time again for the Order of the Phoenix to get information to all of them about Voldemort's activities.
"He's actually quite a catch," Molly informed all of them. "Money alone."
"Then it's true, he does have money?" Hermione asked.
"Oh heavens, dear," Molly laughed. "Simply being a Potion Master would make him rich enough - there isn't a more lucrative job in all the Wizarding World than that. But he also comes from old money."
"But he's too old for Harry," Ron argued further.
Both Molly and Arthur looked surprised by that comment. "He's only twenty years older than Harry," Arthur pointed out as if that seemed the most common thing in the world. Harry was beginning to suspect that once again there was something else about Wizarding society he hadn't learned. That suspicion was only confirmed when Ron sighed and nodded in agreement.
Once again Muggle-born Hermione came to his rescue. "Think about how long wizards live," she whispered quietly to him. "Double if not triple the life expectancy of a Muggle. An age difference would have to be closer to sixty or eighty years before anyone would notice it."
He nodded in sudden comprehension. "I guess none of this matters anyway," Harry sighed. "Doesn't really matter if I marry Snape, Filch or McGonagall. I either have to get married, run for my life, or change my name to Fudge. And since two of those choices end with me being dead at the hands of Voldemort, I guess the other isn't that bad." His stomach twisted and protested the very thought however. He felt sick.
Before anyone could offer further argument or consolation the door opened and Percy re-entered, catching all their attention. "What ever you're going to do, you had best do it soon," he informed all of them. "The final document was just filed at the Ministry. Fudge will be here within a half hour to take Harry away."
"Well that's it then," Dumbledore proclaimed. "No more arguments. We have no choice in this matter, and we don't have time to find a different solution." He looked rather pointedly at Snape at this. The Potion Master just glared and looked away. Harry took that to mean that Arthur was right and that Snape had indeed been persuaded. He felt momentarily faint.
"We had best get this over with then," Dumbledore continued. "Percy we'll need your help with the documentation."
"Documentation?" Percy asked in confusion.
"Harry and Snape are getting married," Ron informed his brother. Percy's eyes widened in shock and he looked to his parents for confirmation.
"Can you get the paper filed tonight?" Arthur asked his son.
Percy sputtered for a moment, and then seem to catch himself. "Of course," he nodded, though his eyes were still wide with disbelief. "I can sneak it in with the rest of my paperwork before records close tonight."
"Well, then let's get to it," Dumbledore insisted. "Harry, come here."
Harry rose to his feet, surprised to find that his legs actually still supported him as he walked somewhat dazed toward the Headmaster and Professor Snape. He caught the look McGonagall threw him, a mixture of pity and disbelief as if she too could not believe that the hero of her house was going to have to marry the head of Slytherin. He couldn't begin to imagine what this was going to spell for the rest of the year, how this would affect his standing at the school. But considering if he didn't do this, in a half hour he'd be dragged out of this castle for good by Cornelius Fudge, he supposed there was no choice in the matter.
He found himself standing in front of the Headmaster beside a glaring Severus Snape. "Clasp right hands together," Dumbledore told them both.
Harry held out one shaking hand, unable to make himself take the initiative and actually take Snape's hand himself. Snape did it for him. Snape's hand was not shaking, and his grip was just a trifle too tight for Harry's peace of mind. His hand felt warm and Harry found his face heating in embarrassment. He couldn't bring himself to look into Snape's face, not certain he could endure the look of disgust he was certain he would see there. He felt humiliated by the whole situation.
"We'll keep this simple then," Dumbledore assure them all. "Just a quick exchange of vows and that will be the extent of it. Harry, repeat after me. I, Harry James Potter, take you Severus Alexander Snape as my bond-mate, joining body, name, house and power to thine."
They weren't the words Harry was familiar with in Muggle marriages, but he repeated them carefully, not really believing any of this was happening. Nor could he believe the words he next heard.
"I, Severus Alexander Snape, take you Harry James Potter as my bond-mate, joining body, name, house and power to thine." The melodious voice of the Potions Master was filled with the same snide mocking tones he'd come to expect in the last six years. He still didn't dare look up.
"Excellent," Albus nodded, then held out his left hand, wand in his right. One quick tap of his wand and two golden rings appeared in the palm of his hand. He handed one to each of them. Snape took the initiative in this, twisting Harry's right hand over and sliding one of the gold rings onto his third finger. "With this ring, I thee wed," he growled. The ring fit perfectly, no doubt a testament to Dumbledore's magic. But it felt strangely cold and heavy on his hand.
He took the other ring and slid it into Snape's finger, his own hands still shaking noticeable. "With this ring, I thee wed," he muttered weakly the knot in his stomach growing tighter. It suddenly occurred to Harry what typically followed the exchange of rings in most marriage ceremony.
"Then I pronounce you bonded," Albus declared. "You may. . ."
Both Harry and Snape glared at him for all they were worth, silencing any suggestion that they kiss. "Ah, yes, of course," Dumbledore cleared his throat. "Right, then the documentation." He waved his wand again, producing a large scroll out of the air. "Standard bonding contract," he informed them, unrolling the scroll on a side table and producing a quill and bottle of ink. "If you would both sign it."
Snape stepped forward and angrily scratched his name across the document, turning then to hand the quill to Harry. Harry momentarily caught the gaze of the Potion Master, nearly flinching under the anger he saw there. He took the quill, turning his attention back to the document and signed away his life on the line next to Snape's signature.
"And Molly and Arthur if you would both witness the document," Albus asked the two of them.
The two Weasleys nodded and came forward to add their own signatures to the document. Harry risked a glance at his two friends. The looks of sympathy on both their faces nearly made Harry cry. Percy stood beside them, looking on, his own face set in a look of pure disbelief and amazement.
"That's it then," Dumbledore announced. He rolled up the scroll, magically made a copy of it, then handed one of them over to Percy. "Good luck, my boy," he informed the young man. Percy nodded and headed back out the door.
"Well, I suggest a celebration is in order," Dumbledore told the group. "While we wait for Minister Fudge to put in an appearance."
Though it was quite obvious that no one was in any mood to celebrate, no one protested as the Headmaster conjured up a bottle of champagne and a tray of sweets. Harry, leaving the champagne to the adults, took one of the chocolates from the tray and sat down on the far side of the room, trying to get his nerves under control. Ron and Hermione sat down beside him in silence. He was peripherally aware of Snape sitting down himself as far from the three of them as possible, while the other five adults each drained a glass of champagne as if they needed the alcohol to get through the rest of the evening.
They didn't have long to wait. Dobby entered a few moments later announcing that Minister Fudge had arrived and wanted to speak with the Headmaster and Harry Potter immediately.
"Show him in here, Dobby," Dumbledore told the elf. The little elf nodded and disappeared. A few moments later the door opened and Minister Fudge strode into the room followed by two Aurors - Harry recognized them both. They had been assigned as Fudge's body guards when it became obvious that Voldemort had returned finally. Fudge rarely went anywhere without them now. Their presence made Harry sick with the realization that Fudge really did mean to drag him out of Hogwarts this very night.
"Ah, Cornelius!" Albus greeted with a bright smile. "So good to see you. We're having a bit of celebration. Would you care for a glass of champagne?"
Somewhat taken aback by the friendly greeting, Fudge's look of determination faltered briefly. Then he shook his head. "No, I'm not interested in champagne." He waved a document in the air for all of them to see. "I'm here to take. . ."
"But come, Cornelius," Dumbledore interrupted him, holding out a glass of champagne. "It's a marriage celebration."
"Confound it all, Albus!" Fudge exclaimed. "I'm here on official business." He shoved the document at Dumbledore, who sighed and took it from him, looking briefly at the content on the page.
"Yes, so I see," Dumbledore nodded in agreement, and Fudge looked momentarily triumphant. "You've adopted Harry," Dumbledore continued. "Which would be all well and fine I suppose if it were legal."
"I assure it is completely legal," Fudge informed him, and if he was surprised by Dumbledore's apparent lack of amazement at the revelation he didn't let on.
"Well, yes," Dumbledore agreed again. "If Harry were of proper legal status to require a guardian. But as he's now married, it's hardly an issue any longer."
Fudge's look of triumphant vanished and he glanced at the champagne Albus was still holding out toward him. "Married? What in Merlin's name are you talking about?"
Dumbledore smiled. "Harry is married," he announced. "We're celebrating the nuptials even now." He raised the champagne glass again. "So as good as your intentions are to rescue Harry from the dubious protections of his uncle, it's no longer necessary."
"Married! To whom!" Fudge demanded, turning toward Harry, his gaze instantly falling on Hermione Granger who was sitting beside Harry and holding his hand in her own. He advanced on two of them. "Ms. Granger, I might have known. This matter will be taken care of immediately. You will both. . ."
To Harry's utter surprise, Snape was suddenly on his feet and across the room standing between him and Fudge before the Minister could take another step toward them. "He's married to me, Fudge!" the Potion Master growled at the man. He held up his right hand, the golden ring flashing on his finger. "And he's not going anywhere with you. Ever!"
Fudge actually took several steps back in shock, the two Aurors with him exchanging looks of wary surprise. Fudge looked toward Dumbledore for confirmation. The headmaster happily waved his own document at the Minister. "Would you like to see the marriage certificate?" he asked brightly.
Fudge took the certificate Dumbledore offered him, blanching as he read the signatures on it. "You can't expect me to believe that this marriage is . . ." he paused as if searching for an appropriate word. He glared at Snape. "That this marriage is valid?"
The sneer that Snape threw him reminded Harry of the look the professor got just before he took away a huge numbers of points from Gryffindor. "Minister Fudge, apart from that fact that our private life is none of your business, you can't actually be suggesting that you think I wouldn't take advantage of every opportunity afforded to me?"
If he hadn't mentioned the bit about a private life, Harry suspected he might not have understood what Snape meant. As it was not only did he figure it out but so did Hermione and Ron and all three of them turned bright red at the implication. Surely Snape wasn't suggesting. . .actually judging by the look of equal parts embarrassment and fury on Fudge's face, that was exactly what Snape was implying. Harry looked over at Dumbledore and McGonagall, but neither of them looked particularly worried by the idea. Molly and Arthur both looked embarrassed but not worried, and Madam Hooch was actually doing her best to cover up a snicker of laughter.
Fudge glared at Snape in disgust. "No, I suppose that would be expecting too much of you, wouldn't it?" He turned to glare at Dumbledore. "I can't believe you would allow this, Dumbledore! To put Harry Potter into the hands of this man!"
Dumbledore just smiled happily at him. "Why, Cornelius I can't image what you are talking about. I'm so very happy for Harry and Severus. It's a wonderful match, don't you think?"
There were times when Harry believed that the Headmaster was quite unhinged. How he could say the things he did with such a believable smile on his face was beyond Harry. He'd almost swear the man actually believed everything he said.
Far from agreeing with Dumbledore, Fudge just snatched up his adoption papers and strode out of the room in anger, his two body guards following meekly along behind him.
"Well, that went well, didn't it?" Dumbledore said brightly. "Brilliantly played, Severus!"
For a brief moment Snape almost looked pleased by Dumbledore's comment, then he caught sight of Harry staring at him in disbelief, and the sneer of disgust returned with a vengeance.
"What happens next, sir?" Harry asked Dumbledore. "Do you think he'll try something else like that?"
Dumbledore just shook his head. "I think we're safe enough from Fudge. He won't cross Severus. And I'm more than certain Severus can deal with any other problems that might arise with the Ministry."
Not certain at all that he liked the idea of having his safety suddenly handed over to Severus Snape, Harry just fell silent. He was more than grateful at Molly's suggestion that they call it a night, pointing out that there was still school in the morning. Ron bid good-bye to his parents, then clapped both Harry and Hermione on the shoulder. "Let's get up to the tower before anything else happens!" he told the two of them.
Before they could leave the room, Professor McGonagall stopped them. "I'm sorry, Harry," she said quietly. "You'll be moving immediately into the dungeons with Severus. I'll have the elves send your belongings down."
Harry, struck speechless, could only stare at her. Ron, however, became quite vocal. "What! You can't expect Harry to live with the Slytherins! He belongs up in Gryffindor tower with the rest of us. Just because he had to marry that . . .that. . .Professor Snape doesn't automatically make him a Slytherin!"
"You misunderstand me, Mr. Weasley," McGonagall said curtly. "I'm not saying Harry will be moving into the Slytherin dormitories. He'll be moving into Severus' quarters. They're married now, and while we don't often have married students on campus, the rules are quite explicit. They reside either at a private house in Hogsmeade, or in private rooms within the castle. They do not share dormitories with the single students; that would be improper. So unless Severus is planning on moving to Hogsmeade. . ." She glanced expectantly over at Snape who was waiting surprisingly patiently by the door. The glare in his eyes was indication enough of what he thought of this whole situation.
"No, I'm not planning on moving," he growled.
"Then Harry will be living in the dungeons," McGonagall confirmed. "Now run along all of you. Despite the situation you will all be expected to behave like students come morning, and classes start early for all of us."
Ron and Hermione just stared at Harry in horror as he shrugged and made his way reluctantly toward Snape. He stared at the Potion Master, not entirely certain what to expect from him. Snape just snorted in disgust, turned in a flaring swirl of robes and stormed toward the stairs that led to the dungeons. Harry followed silently behind him, heart pounding in his chest.