Word Count: 1698
~Kiva
Leaning down, I wind a bow with my shoe laces, making the most of the brief break to get regain my breath.
"Seems as though you're back to rule breaking," Ark observes from where he leans against the wall.
I wipe the sweat from my brow. "Huh?"
It's been a day and he is back on his feet, watching over my training. He still looks battered, and at points I've noticed him wavering...but he won't admit that.
His gaze is glacial. "What is it about near-death experiences that leaves you needing to touch yourself."
I frown. I didn't...
Oh.
My mind flickers back to last night, at the sinful thing I did with my mate, a man whose face I haven't even seen, whose voice I haven't even heard.
It went too far last night. I shouldn't have allowed myself to indulge in something so wrong.
"Oh, I didn't...I mean..."
Ark raises his brow. "Hmm?"
"It's probably the adrenaline. I don't know," I mutter, straightening.
I hope he doesn't comment on my lack of eye contact. I'm thoroughly embarrassed, and it's not as if I can tell him about the depravity of my actions last night.
"You reverted all the great progress you were making." He strides at me. His presence doesn't aid my discomfort, as I sweep the area with my eyes for any escape.
"I'm regretting it now, trust me," I mumble into my hand, blowing warmth onto my cold fingertips.
Ark bends slightly at the hip to look directly into my eyes. "What is your punishment going to be?"
My actions are haunting me, is that not enough? I'm thoroughly embaressed and ashamed, and yet I cannot consider in anyone.
Ark would...I don't even want to think about what he would do.
Images flash through my mind. I'm pressed against the tree by my mates strong grip, his powerful body holding me tight.
The pleasure I felt.
I let out a big breath. "A chastity belt?"
Something as depraved and disturbed as I am, clearly.
"Since you're clearly feeling regret, I'll delay your punishment until I see fit," he eventually conceedes, tilting his head as he examines my expression.
Part of me wants to tell him, as if I'm repenting. He wouldn't want to hear that though, and his inevitable punishment he would enforce on me would only make me feel more guilty.
I glare up at him. "So you plan to torture me?"
He offers me a smile, mostly out of pity. "Only a little."
"You are terrible. What training am I doing today?" It would be nice to delve deep into training and not think about this. I actually enjoy training, when Ark isn't being unnecessarily harsh.
Ark looks over me. "I think your strength is improving, as you clearly overpowered your attacker, so I'm thinking something more skill based."
I rub the back of my neck. For a moment there I did fight him, but his strength was beyond mine. Had he wanted to kill me, were that his aim, he would have been successful.
"I didn't overpower him. He walked away," I admit sheepishly.
I'm walking a fine line. By admitting that to him, I risk him finding out the reason why my mate had mercy.
"Did you say something to him?"
"I begged him for my life. I wanted him to see me as an equal, as someone who didn't deserve to be targeted just because of her father," I tell him. I've lied my entire life, mostly to my father, so at this point, I'm proficient at it.
Ark still doesn't look convinced. "And he walked away..."
"I think...I think they want me alive. I think they are going to kidnap me." That much is true. Whether that is because they want to save me because I am mated to one of them, or because they want to torture me for information, I don't know.
I like to think my mate wouldn't hurt me. But what if I'm wrong about that?
Ark steps forward, looking like he is going to touch me, but decides against it. "That's not happen, okay?"
"What if it does?" I whisper.
He doesn't know the seriousness of this, at how possible it is that they will eventually get there way. He nearly died because of it. Next time, I don't think they will make the mistake of letting him survive.
"It won't. That's why I'm training you, so you can keep yourself safe when I can't," he explains slowly, his tone gentle and tentative.
"I just wish I knew why they were being so persistent." I chew on my nail. They hate royals, I get that.
But father is a good leader. He's kind, and his people love him. A small rebellious group is inevitable, but they have so much more strength than we anticipated.
"If they want to kidnap you, I'm going to assume it's for political leverage, or maybe ransom." Ark frowns, deep in thought.
I shift from foot to foot. "I'm scared, Ark..."
He steps forward, pressing a finger under my chin, lifting my head. The fabric of his gloves are so cold, so distinct feeling.
"Hey, look at me," he murmurs, his gaze holding mine. "You are stronger than them. Don't allow this fear to overrun your life, alright?"
My voice drops to a whisper. "It's hard for it to not to."
He tucks his hand back behind him. "Soon, you'll be strong enough, and skilled enough, that not only can you fight them off, but you can stand up to your father, and decide whether you even want this life."
I physically flinch.
Not because what he said is particular ridiculous or offensive. In fact, I've thought about it many times before. But saying it aloud, especially from his mouth is unexpected.
"Ark. You can't just say that," I hiss lowly, glancing at the gym doors, as if someone may be close and overhear such scandelous talk.
"Why not?"
"This life isn't a choice. I cannot walk away from it." He doesn't understand, this is a reality I've lived since I was born.
What I want doesn't matter. Not with this.
Something flickers in Ark's eyes. Anger.
"There is a world beyond this small one. It's filled with interesting people...I mean, don't you want to get out there and find someone to love? To maybe work as a normal person would and be happy?"
He says it so smoothly, but I can hear the bite in his tone. He's trying to convince me of something that I've never experienced...never even thought I deserved.
"That will never be my reality," I insist.
He slowly shakes his head. "Say's who?"
"My father."
"Your father..." he breaks off, a sense of urgent rage flashing over his face for the briefest moment before it vanishes.
For that fleeting second, I see what I'm sure many of victims have seen before he killed them.
And he doesn't like my father. It's clear to me now.
He leans forward. "He has no right to tell you what to do. None at all."
"How is the training going?"
We pull away from each other so fast someone watching on may have been convinced we are anxious lovers.
My father stands in the doorway to the gym brushing snow from his shoulders. He doesn't seem to have noticed the heated conversation being exchanged between Ark and I, merely nodding at the guard who bows his head in respectful greeting.
I stare at the side of Ark's face. He hates my father and yet works for him? How good is he getting paid?
"Father. What brings you here?" I ask distractedly.
"Training is going well, Sir. We are just working on Kiva's confidence. It will help immensely so she can stand up for herself," Ark responds blandly.
I scowl at him, although it goes unnoticed.
"Excellent. Well, I'm here to have you shipped away for the night," father says, stalking into the room. He seems so at odds in here, with all the training equipment while he wears all his finery.
"What? Where?"
"There is news that there is going to be another attack, so we want you at the cabin on the edge of the Territory just in case," he instructs.
My breath catches in my throat. "Mother's cabin?"
"Yes. No one knows it exists except close family, so I believe you will be safer there, with Ark." Father motions to my guard with a tight smile.
This is serious, obviously. Father doesn't send me to that cabin often, especially since mother died. And for Ark to learn about it means he trusts him.
"You wish for me to join her?" Even Ark sounds surprised.
"You are an excellent soldier, Ark. I trust no one else in this manor to protect her, and if too many go with her, it will arise suspicions," he explains. "I will be nearby where I may be needed, and tomorrow, you may return."
Ark nods once. "Understood."
I scrunch up my nose. Seriously? Being stuck with Ark for the night isn't exactly what I had in mind, and I'm sure it's going to be insufferable.
"Alright, well you best leave soon then." Father leans forward and kisses my forehead before departing.
I stare at his back, feeling irritation bubble up within me.
"What...What if I don't want to be-" Ark puts his hand over my mouth, cutting me off. Father strolls from the room, none-the-wiser to my complaints.
I shove him off me, stumbling away a couple steps.
"I can't stand you," I snap, shaking off the feeling of his hand over my mouth. Against my will, memories of that night I first found my mate flash through my head.
Just like that, it hits me like a wave.
Ark winks, seeing nothing shift in my demeanour. "Shh. You have to spend the night with me, I suggest you be nice."
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I hope you all enjoyed this chapter! and as always it is available 10 chapters ahead on Radish!
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~Midika 💜🐼