Harry trailed behind Ron and Hermione, looking more like a zombie than a person. It was three days since Sirius had died and he hadn't even tried to sleep. Ron and Hermione were extremely worried about him, Ron doing his best not to let Harry be alone for very long. It didn't help that the school year was ending soon, which always made Harry isolate himself.
"Hey, mate, you should really go to Mme Pomfrey." Ron said, his eyebrows knitted together in worry.
The pair of them had tried to convince Harry to get treatment, or at least talk to Mme Pomfrey, every day. He never went, and only seemed to be getting worse. He barely paid attention in class or did any homework, narrowly avoiding many detentions only with Hermione's help. He still seemed like he was waiting for Sirius' ghost to come, but it wasn't going to happen.
"I'm fine." Harry said, his eyes dull and looking dead.
The Hospital Wing seemed to be the only place Harry wouldn't follow them to; they had tried a few times and Harry would just stop, or wander off on his own.
"No, you're really not Harry. Please." Hermione begged for the umpteenth time.
"I said I'm fine." Harry was a little more forceful, but it still wasn't convincing.
As they approached the bottom of the stairs they overheard a fight that sounded like it was between some third years. It wasn't clear what it was about or what caused it, but it was nearly lunch and there would be other Prefects around either now or before long. There would also be teachers there.
With a soft hoot Hedwig landed on Harry's shoulder. It was no longer uncommon to see the large snowy owl flying through the castle looking for Harry or on his shoulder. She rarely had a letter for him, but she seemed to provide him with more comfort than anyone else could. This time though she did.
Harry opened the letter as he turned the corner at the bottom of the stairs, not paying attention to the yelling. Harry looked up to Hedwig's screech as he opened the letter, seeing Ron and Hermione starting to rush back towards him and a spell hurtling it's way right at him.
The spell hit Harry square in the chest, winding him and making him need to lean against the wall to support himself and catch his breath. He had no clue what the spell was, but it hurt like a bitch, feeling like a Dudley had punched him with full strength. Hedwig was holding onto his shoulder by the wall, but her talons were much tighter than they were before.
"Hey mate, you good?"
Harry knew that voice.
He whirled around to face the person whose hand was on his shoulder, his green eyes wide. That was Sirius' voice, but it couldn't be. Sirius never called him Mate, that was Ron's thing, and besides ghosts couldn't touch people. Harry didn't care too much though, it meant that Sirius did come back for him.
Sure enough it was Sirius, but it wasn't a ghost.
16 year old Sirius was smiling at him, alive and well, though he looked a little confused seeing Harry's eyes, with Remus beside him, looking just as confused.
"James? You did something to change your eye colour?" Remus asked, looking confused and a little disappointed with him. That made Harry's heart drop in a way he didn't completely understand.
"Sorry, I'm not James." Harry said, trying to smile as he backed away.
It was odd. Seeing Sirius again - what he had been wanting so desperately that he half convinced himself he had seen the ghost of the man out of the corner of his eye - was now he actually saw Sirius Harry just felt the need to run.
"Padfoot, Moony, what are you two doing?" James asked with a laugh in his voice, walking over to the two with Peter beside him.
James' arrival made the hand on Harry's shoulder let go, allowing Harry to slip away. He had always been fast, he had to be to get away from Dudley, so he got rather a lot of distance between them quickly, pulling out the invisibility cloak, covering himself and Hedwig with it. He probably shouldn't have run away, but he wasn't going to be able to explain anything he didn't understand himself. He also might find himself attacking Peter which would only make the rest of them hate him.
Harry stopped to breathe just out of the way in the passage from the dungeons to the Great Hall He was either under the effect of a strong spell that changed his perception, or he ended up in the past. Neither option really seemed likely, but it had to be one. Either way he wasn't going to lessons like this, but he probably shouldn't go to Gryffindor tower. He hated being in the Hospital Wing; Mme Pomfrey was always so critical as she fussed over him in ways that he didn't need. It's always easy to say he had done the wrong thing when the problem was solved, but beforehand everyone expected him to be a hero. Even when it was the fault of the Dementors she still made him feel guilty.
He guessed the best option would be the Room of Requirement.
It could be as private as he wanted, and it could obviously be more comfortable than anywhere else. He would have to go to the Kitchens for food, but the Room should be able to provide him with clothes. He looked enough like James he likely wouldn't be questioned in the Library either.
"What do you mean you saw a copy of me? Were they making Polyjuice Potion today?"
Harry heard James ask as he slipped past the group of four. He didn't know when Peter joined Voldemort, but he clearly always had the potential with how Remus and Sirius spoke to him. Harry felt more hatred to the rat man than probably anyone else. How could he not? Peter caused the deaths of his parents, framed Sirius, isolated Remus, and doomed him to a life where he had to live up to everyone's expectations not even knowing if he would survive the summers, let alone school years. If all of that wasn't bad enough then there was what happened in the Graveyard where he killed Cedric, tied Harry up and stole his blood, and gave Voldemort a body back.
Honestly Harry was proud of himself for not hexing the rat as he passed by, but he knew Hermione would tell him that it was expected of him and not worth praising.
"No, the kid looked a little different, their eyes were green..." Remus said, Harry not hearing the rest as he walked further away.
"I need a place to stay and be alone. I need a place to stay and be alone. I need a place to stay and be alone." Harry thought, pacing in front of the stretch of wall that opened to the Room of Requirement.
The door that popped up was different to every other one he had ever seen before; it had flowers engraved into it, a few made of different types of wood. The wood itself was dark, with a sections that were much darker. The door handle was bronze and had an "H" engraved into it in a very curly font.
Opening the door Harry found a very comfortable small room. It was significantly larger than either his room or cupboard at the Dursleys, but it wasn't so large it would make him feel anxious about the large , open space. The bed was about the same type as the ones in the dorms, but the posts and frame were rather more decorated. It looked like it was engraved to match the door, except without the different colours of wood. There was a desk with parchment, quills, ink, pencils, and rubbers. The desk and chair also matched the door and bed, the chair did too, and had a soft cushion on the seat. A roaring fire was dancing in the fireplace in the corner by the door. There were a surprising number of seats around the fire for a room for one person; a pair of soft looking armchairs, a small sofa, a couple stools, a lot of cushions, and some large bean bags. An owl perch stood by the desk that had flowers carved into the base. There was a window seat which had about 5 large, soft pillows and an earthy golden blanket draped from it to the floor. The covers on the bed were a wheat colour, with a few black accents.
Harry could only assume that the original owner of the room was a Hufflepuff.
The walls were also earthy tones, the ceiling wooden, with swirling vines of roses painted across it.
It probably wasn't the room that Harry would design for himself, but it was a lovely room nonetheless. It had an inherently homely and lived in feel. It had mess that made it feel like it was truly a place that someone lived, but Harry saw no personal items, and he was sure the Room wouldn't give him a room that was currently occupied with his instructions for it.
Harry was exhausted, looking at the bed only made him realise it more. He didn't have any pyjamas, but he also didn't have the energy to change into some anyway. Harry hadn't slept properly in a long while, the nightmares from Voldemort only helping in making him sleep worse.
Hedwig out a low, gentle hoot, sweeping over to her perch on the other side of the room.
"I'm going Hedwig." Harry mumbled, dropping the bag and flopping on the bed, falling asleep almost immediately.
-----
Harry wasn't questioned as he walked through the castle, though some people did avoid him. From what he cared about his father and the rest of the Marauders that was fair; they were like the Weasley twins. They would prank people throughout the year, but there wouldn't be any pranks on the younger years until they knew the twins well enough to know they were accepting the possibility of being pranked when they take something from them or touch them. The people who were avoiding him were probably trying not to be pranked.
Harry could enjoy a good prank, even if he was rarely a target of them (he figured that Fred and George never saw him in the right state to prank, because they definitely knew who was and wasn't in a mental place to be pranked), but he wasn't one to pull them. He was far too worried about backlash to be able to do that. When with the Dursleys even the pettiest joke from him could have serious consequences.
Harry got to the library without anyone trying to talk to him, and found himself a small table by a window. The view was of the lake, where he could see the giant squid's tentacles lazily waving by the surface.
Harry gathered all books on time magic that he could, not even bothering to try to look in the restricted section, even though he knew he would be able to find some useful information there. He had no chance to get a note that would get Mme Pince to give him the book. Then again, she always hated giving anyone any books, especially the ones in the restricted section.
"If Hermione was here I'd get the answer so much faster." Harry groaned, hitting his head with the book he had just finished reading. It was entirely useless at the situation he seemed to be in as it only talked about Time Turners. "If she were here the decision would be so much easier."
Harry guessed the time he was spending trying to figure out what had happened was the easiest. He couldn't send himself back to the right time until he knew how everything happened. But after that a decision had to be made.
Should he stay in the time where people only think he's James, but still a normal person rather than a famous person who hardly knows anything about the world he was dropped in at 11. If eh stayed then he would be able to leave Hogwarts, or enrol as himself and people would eventually learn the difference. He might even be able to play Quidditch with his father, or become close to his parents. He would never tell them who he was, but that doesn't mean he wasn't desperate to be close to them. He would never have a parent-child relationship with them, but he didn't think he was made for normal family dynamics. He would never be able to get along with Peter, but he might be able to replace the rat man. But if he stayed here he wouldn't be able to see Ron and Hermione again, and he would be abandoning the world that needed him after Voldemort being revealed.
Or should he go back? If he did that then he may well end up in trouble again for being involved in yet another incident. Harry didn't think he could remember the last time he had been even slightly involved in an incident and not been told off for it. He would also be back in the spotlight for everything he did, not being given even the slightest break after something traumatic. He would have Hermione, Ron, Fred, George, Ginny, Molly, and Arthur, and the adult Remus, but he was always worse off than alone over summers and Dumbledore seemed determined to not listen to him. It felt far less appealing, but it was probably the right decision as far as there was one.
"James!" A voice snapped at Harry, the tone making it clear that this was not the first time the person had called him.
Harry jumped and looked up at the person who had caused him, his breath hitching. He had only seen pictures of her as an adult before, but it was obviously her; Lily Evans. She was beautiful, and her eyes truly were the same as his, though now hers showed irritation at him, which made Harry think of Petunia uncomfortably.
"Sorry, I'm not James." Harry said, feeling a little scared.
"Sorry." Lily said, though she didn't seem to believe him, looking Harry up and down.
"People recently have been thinking I'm him, you're not alone." Harry said, packing up his things to go back to his room.
Lily was still looking over Harry, looking a rather guarded confused. The closer she looked at him the more obvious it was that Harry was not James. It was more than just eye colour that showed they were different, but not everything that was different from James was the same as Lily.
Harry really couldn't understand himself at the moment. All of these people he was running away from were the people he wanted to know. Remus was the only person he wanted to be close to and didn't miss, Sirius he at least somewhat knew, but Lily and James were probably the people he had missed the most for the longest time, but being around Lily just made him want to run. He had wanted parents who loved him since before he could remember, and this Lily and James wouldn't be that.
Harry rushed through the halls to the Room of Requirement, leaving all the books behind. If he was going to stay in this time any longer he would have to get control of himself and stop running away, it was annoying him as well. Why was he turning into such a scaredey-cat?
Hedwig let out a half comforting, half annoyed hoot at him as Harry slipped into the room.
"I know Hedwig, I'm trying." Harry slid down the door, ending up with his head on his knees as he sat on the floor. "Why is this so much harder than it should be? They're the ones in the right time and place."