IT WOULDN'T BE A FAMILY DINNER WITHOUT DRAMA.
Instantly, I'm feeling guilty, guilty because Mr. Benson hasn't conversed with anyone, until now. Which, it seemed like everyone here- but me, obviously- knew what was going to happen when he cleared his throat. Nolan's hand that's on my thigh froze the instant Mr. Benson cleared his throat. Now, when he finally spoke, Nolan's grip tightened instantly making me feel nervous. Not nervous as in he would hurt me, but nervous that the tension was probably going to get worse.
"John. Can we please not do this." Misty's tone was short and intimidating, the look she gave John left no room for compromise, but sadly it looked like he really didn't give a fuck.
"Son, I asked you a question." He calmly states, staring at Nolan.
"What happened between Alice, and I stays between Alice and I." The wind instantly gets knocked out of my chest. Of course, this seems to be a never-ending problem that keeps getting brought up.
"It is when Trent brings it up in front of investors at the course." John's voice comes out loud and clipped.
I instantly flinch, not intentionally but the tone reminds me of someone who I don't want to be reminded of. Nolan's hand starts to rub soothing circles on my thigh, calming me almost instantly but I still feel my body is on high alert. I've never been one that deals with confrontation, I'm the emotional person that cries at everything. So I'm definitely out of my element.
"Alice doesn't take no for an answer,' I told her my honest feelings. That's it, can we please drop it." Nolan's voice comes out low and threatening, a tone I haven't heard from him before. Sadly, John doesn't stop.
"Why are you doing this? Alice is such a good fit for you, she came to my office the other day in tears because of Emberly here," He pauses as his cold brown eyes lock on me, instantly my body flushes with embarrassment and I look away. "was rude to her." I start to nervously play with my fingers, guilt hits me like a car, I can't believe I'm ruining brunch.
My eyes instantly lift and follow Nolan's hand as he moves it off my thigh and grips the table, his knuckles turning white.
"Alice says she's a gold digger and that Emberly is after your money. You're going to let this stranger into your home, into your life, just because she's a new pie-"
"Shut the fuck up." Nolan's voice booms making everyone at the table, including his father, jump. "You don't know a fucking thing. You won't even try to get to know Emberly, which is a completely heartbreaking dad. I'm absolutely disgusted by how you're treating her. You raised me to be a man, yet you're acting like a child because I won't date your best friends fucking daughter. Alice is a shitty human being, I refuse to surround myself with that." Nolan instantly lets go of the table and abruptly stands up, the table shaking at the force. His stormy blue eyes land on mine, the anger in his eyes softly dissipates as he looks at me.
"Mother, thank you for brunch, bros you know where I am. I'll see you later." He lightly grabs my hand and leads me up the steps, it's silent between us. Nolan is lost in his thoughts and I'm lost in mine. I feel guilty for ruining brunch. Guilty for being the cause of the rift between his father and him. Guilt that I track drama where I go. Guilt for being so fucking turned on.
I've never, in my life, had someone stand up for me.
The confidence that radiated Nolan as he spoke up about me had me crossing my legs instantly as arousal hit me like a deer on the interstate.
"Emberly, Nolan, wait!" A very out of breath Misty came running up behind us. Nolan instantly stops but keeps his hand firmly interlocked with mine. "I made your father leave.. Please.. Please stay, Emberly sweetheart. I'm so sorry." Misty's eyes mist as she looks at me, her bottom lip trembles as she looks at me. My heart instantly breaks and falls down to my stomach. I feel like I'm drowning in guilt.
"I'm so sorry for ruining brunch Mrs. Benson." I apologized, my way of trying to stay afloat so I don't sink.
Misty's eyes open wide in shock and Nolan instantly turns me to face him. His shock expression turns to anger as his blue eyes lock on mine. "Emberly, this wasn't your fault my dad is just a dick." His hand moves up to my cheek as he slowly moves his thumb back and forth staring deeply into my eyes. Leave it up to Nolan to pull me out.
"Please don't go dear, I saw how much you loved the garden, please stay.." Misty begs as she looks between Nolan and I. The puppy dog eyes must have worked on Nolan because he shoots me a questioning look.
I don't have it in my heart to tell his mom no.
"Fine, we'll stay, but I'm taking Emberly on a walk first." His face voids of emotion. His mom straightens up and nods. She shoots me an apologetic look.
"Thank you Mrs. Benson for asking us to stay." I softly say, hoping to ease the tension I've caused.
"Dear, you call me Misty." She squeezes my shoulder in a reassuring way. Nolan takes a deep breath before running his hand down his face, looking defeated he shoots me a glance before leading us back down the steps. As we walk down the steps I notice the table is empty and no one is insight. He tugs on our interlaced fingers as he leads me to the woods.
I was only joking about my comment earlier.
The sticks beneath our feet snap as we continue to walk through, I try my best to not roll my ankles in my wedges as we continue to walk. Nolan must have noticed because he instantly stops and turns around to face me. His blue eyes look at me with concern before shifting down to my feet before meeting my eyes. His stoic expression leaves me concerned, but that's quickly dissolved as he picks me up- bridal style- and then continues our walk through the woods
It stays silent between us, a few birds chirp as they fly overhead. The beautiful sunny weather shines down on Nolan, instantly taking my breath away. His bright blue eyes shine, his freckles are more noticeable in the sunlight, I'm entranced. The sound of a creak makes me look away, instantly my eyes fall on the stunning rustic gazebo. Flowers cover the posts like vines, beautiful pinks, purples, oranges, reds, and whites surround the pavilion. It's breathtaking. Nolan sets me down on the wooden bench and joins me.
The silence is suffocating. I hate not knowing what he's thinking. I hope I didn't upset him; he seems like a family man. Seems like, what am I saying, he is. Which is probably why this might not work because here I am, stirring up family drama and he could have a woman- like Alice- a woman loved by the whole family.
"Ember."
Here we go, this is it. This is him realizing I'm not the one, that he wasted his time. That he regrets sticking up for me. That I'm too much. That I'm not right for him. That he can't be with someone his family doesn't like. That I'm not good enough for him.
"Ember, I'm so sorry." Yup. Just like I thought, tears burn as they brim my eyes. I clear my throat trying to swallow the lump that's forming in my throat. I should have known someone as perfect as him wouldn't want to be with someone as fucked up as I am. "I'm beyond angry my dad spoke that way about you and to you. Ember-"
"I'm not going to make you choose between your family and I, Nolan." I interrupted him, I can't have him resenting me in the future.
"Ember, he's the one in the fucking wrong." He takes my hand in his, his dark locks shake with his head, I wasn't expecting him to react this way, I really thought I knew where this was going.
"Nolan, I can't put you through that, I don't want to be the reason your family doesn't get along." I mumble softly, unable to look him in the eyes, I instead look around at the flowers. They're far more appealing than this conversation.
"My family won't get along because of him. I made it clear to him even before you were even in the picture Emberly, I do not have feelings for her, nor will I ever. I have never felt the way I feel for you for anyone else. I will not lose this," He motions between us with his fingers, while his piercing eyes hold mine with promise. "I will not lose you." He shakes his head as he rests his forehead against mine.
He never ceases to amaze me. It's absolutely incredible how much I feel like he knows me. He always manages to reassure me at times where I least expect it. I'm quickly realizing that my feelings for him are developing stronger at a faster rate than I anticipated. It's terrifying. It's intoxicating. It's refreshing. It's beautiful.
To feel appreciated after such a dark time in my life- I can't even find the words- I'm speechless. To feel wanted for once, instead of a burden, to feel loved after everything I've been through these last few years is everything and more to me. I know love is a bit far stretched, I know he doesn't but I at least know he does care deeply for me. He's proving that time and time again.
So.
That leads me to my next audacious move.
I moved expeditiously as I got down on my knees in front of him. Nolan chokes on his breath, I'd like to think of it's a positive effect from my bold move. My hands hold onto his hips as I slowly look up at him through my lashes. He spluttered as he tried to form words. I feel my chest puff out, just a little, with pride that I had this effect on this man.
I move my hands down his legs, my nails run slowly down his thighs as I bite my lip to hold back my smile. He readjusts himself as I continue to tease him. His hands move to grip the bench on either side of him.
"I have a confession." Something about the way he looks at me, the way his body reacts to me, makes me feel bold. Confident. Daring. Sexy.
"Tell me." His voice sounds husky as he licks his lips. His hooded eyes make him look astonishingly sexy. I take a deep breath and muster up all the courage I have in me. After all, he was courageous when he stood up for me.
It's the least I could do.
My fingers reach to the zipper of his pants, the zipping noise has him and I both looking down at his crotch. I undo his belt and -with his help- pull his pants down to his knees, the belch clanking as it meets the floor.
"When you stood up for me, all I wanted to do was this." I say as I palm him through his boxers. A low groan comes from his throat. Instantly my body flushes with heat as my panties get soaked with my arousal. Nolan pushes my hair behind my ear as he tilts his head looking at me. "I just want to show you how much I appreciate you." I bat my eyelashes before slipping my fingers at the top of the waistband of his boxers. Once again- very quickly- he moves his hips to help me get him out of his boxers, instantly freeing his very long, very large, very hard dick, it springs up to his stomach.
The size instantly intimidates me.
Taking a deep-now nervous- breath, I run my nails again along his thighs. Nolan runs his hand through his hair as he sucks on his lip. Feeling gutsy, I look into his eyes, with a serious expression I say, "No you're going to sit there like a good boy while I suck your cock."
Bitch, who even am I?
"Holy fu-" I quickly lick up from his shaft to his tip, my eyes watching his reaction. His shocked expression- mouth parted, eyes wide- changes to him aggressively biting his lip as his blue eyes roll to the back of his head. Instantly, I have to move my legs together as a wave of arousal shocks through me.
"Fuck." He hisses as I swirl my tongue around his tip, his pre-cum a pleasant surprise on my tongue. I lap at the slit in his tip before taking him as far as I can in my throat. His mouth quickly mouths the word fuck repeatedly. He lets out a groan as he tilts his head back, before quickly snapping back to look at me.
"Fuck, just like that baby," I start to bobble my head, the sound of his dick and my lips has caused a damn to burst between my legs. As my lips move up and down his dick my eyes water as he hits the back of my throat. I move back, letting his dick fall from my mouth as I catch my breath, a loud pop noise sounds as he falls from my mouth. I quickly put his dick in my mouth and continue to move, the parts of his dick that don't fit, I use my hands. Arousal burns through me as he watches me. "That's it, yes take it, keep going baby." I slowly take him in deeper. "Good girl, I knew you could do it baby."
His praise is exactly what I crave.
Maybe it's because I'm a people pleaser or maybe it's because I love pleasing Nolan that I start to suck and lap at his dick quicker, hungrier. Feeling his thighs tense, I know he's close, I know it wasn't nice of me- I probably shouldn't have done it- I pull back, instantly he falls from my lips. I start up at him as his mouth parts in shock, looking at me in disbelief.
I want him to beg.
"Please." He whimpers. "Please baby, I want to come." He begins to thrust his hips as he pleads.
I take him back into my mouth and continue. Soon enough, his thighs tense again, he bites down on his lip as he starts lustfully down at me. "Fuck." He lets out a loud moan, I notice his hands clench and unclench next to me. "Fuck." He shouts as he thrusts his hips. "Ember, baby I'm going to fucking come." He lets out a hum as he fucks my mouth, I keep my hands on his thighs as he continues. Nolan goes to pull out of my mouth but I dig my nails into his thighs as I take him as he comes, his salty seed goes down my throat as I swallow. I moan at the taste of him. Nolan's breath comes out in heavy puffs.
I let go of him, a pop sound came from my lips.
I have never been this courageous in the bedroom- I should say gazebo- Burke and I always had a plain vanilla relationship. The guy never ate me out, never cared for me, he was a selfish lover. I felt more like a sex doll, used for his pleasure only.
Nolan quickly stands, pulling his jeans and boxers back on while doing his belt.
Me?
I'm still on my knees.
Nolan grabs my hands before lifting me up to my feet, his intense gaze is locked on to me. His expression is unreadable.
The wind blows, making my long hair cascade around us as we embrace the lovely smell of nature-mainly the flowers- engulf as. This moment for me feels vulnerable and very romantic.
Nolan kisses me.
I mean, he really kisses me.
His tongue dances with mine as he ravishes my lips. One of his large hands holds the curve of my cheek and neck, the other is on my hip as he pulls me against him. Our kiss breaks, both of us needing to catch our breath.
Burke refused to kiss me after I did oral for him. I know it's not for everyone, but the fact Nolan wasted no time to claim my lips with his has me fully aroused. His primal movements leave me breathless and wanting more.
"Holy shit Emberly." He says breathlessly. His fingers dance along my jaw as he looks me deeply in the eyes, instantly my heart melts at the tender look. The way Nolan looks at me makes me feel like I'm the only one.
"Just a small thank you for sticking up for me." My face blushes as reality sets in, I actually did something spontaneous- I loved every second of it. So much so, that if he were to want another blowjob, I'd be back on the ground within seconds.
"Well, shit." He chuckles softly. His dark brown hair flows in the summer breeze. "Ready to go back?" He says, interlacing our fingers as he helps me down the steps. Within seconds, he decides to carry me again. It's peaceful as we walk back to the house, I hear the pounding of his heart as I rest my head against his chest. The small snaps of twigs and the birds melody songs as me humming at how peaceful I felt.
I genuinely felt peaceful, I never realized how much I needed this until I got a taste of Nolan. I meant him in general- not exactly meaning the taste of him- although I enjoyed that too. He's everything I've ever wanted, everything that I've ever needed. I never want to let him go.
But, a quick twinge of dread hits me.
My past- my biggest fear- suffocates me. I wonder if I'll ever truly move on, if I'll ever truly be able to live in peace. But peace seems impossible, danger lurks in every corner, every road. The inevitable danger sits on the horizon, waiting for me.
"Are you alright Emberly?" He gives me a small squeeze as he gazes down on me.
"Yeah, I am." I smile as I force my melancholy thoughts, I need to focus on the present. My present is Nolan, and I secretly hope he'll be my future too. I hope he stays, even with all my baggage.