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Every bone in my body felt brittle, I can feel that before my eyes are even open. There is a heavy, thumping sensation inside my head and I groan. Shuffling over on the bed, when my ankle twitches my eyes shoot open and I take one glance around.
I breathe in deeply, a little too quickly that I almost choke. My eyes float from left to right, I'm in the infirmary. Then I glance down at the bandage around my ankle.
Fuck. The rogues. Kassian.
My feet fly from the bed and I attempt to stabilise myself. It felt like some kind of dream, I got him back. I told Everett to take him home. I barely remember anything after killing Parker, how did I get home?
I can feel the weight of my body slump as I exit the room, desperate to find Kassian. Ignoring the pain in my foot and the exhaustion of my soul, everything will feel better when I know that Kassian is safe with my own two eyes.
My feet take small steps, making sure that I didn't topple over from how unbalanced I currently feel. Blinking my eyes rapidly, trying to clear my vision so I can see what is in front of me.
I step outside of the first infirmary room and look down the hall to the rest.
"Kassian!"
My heart rattles inside me. What if he didn't make it back? What if something happened and Everett didn't manage to get him home safe?
I almost double over on the floor and throw up but I keep going. Pushing my way into each room but not seeing him, not smelling him.
"Kassian!"
Gemma approaches from the other end of the hall, straight from her office. "Luna, you shouldn't be out of bed." She shakes her head, walking towards me.
"Where is he?"
Her eyes are sympathetic but she places a hand on my arm. "Cleo, you need to rest."
"Tell me where he is!" My voice booms across the hall and Gemma swallows harshly.
"I will show you where he is," she starts. "But you still need to rest yourself."
My head shakes and I find it hard to breathe, my chest feeling like it weighs a tonne. "I don't care about that."
"You should Luna," her lips pull into a frown.
"I only care about him. Tell me where he is. I need to see him now."
Gemma nods once and I follow her down the hall, she glances over me apprehensively. "He's in a bad way, Cleo," she stops before touching the handle of the furthest door. "He's been sleeping since he came here. We had to put an IV in him, give him antibiotics for the wounds on his back."
My patience wears thin. "Let me see him."
She sighs softly and opens the door, pushing it wide. I step in instantly and look around the room. Kassian is face down on the bed, his back lashed with scars and fresh wounds. Seeping and bleeding. There are thin bandages over the wounds, presumably covered with a cream to help the healing. But it didn't look good.
His skin is pale, the palest I've ever seen. His face is resting peacefully, an IV in his arm connected to a bag of water along with another machine that beeps beside him. Eyes are red, crusted shut from chemicals that have been thrown in then.
I stand for a few moments, just staring. Like my feet will give way from underneath me if I try and get closer but I know I have to. He needs me. Seeing him like this tears my heart to shreds, makes my wolf uneasy. Distressed.
Finally, I take two brave steps towards him and sink to the floor. Placing my hand against his arm and running it up and down his cold skin. Tears reach my eyes instantly, then I lean forward to kiss the back of his hand.
"I'm here," I mutter between tears. "I'm here with you and nothing is going to take you away from me again."
Kassian doesn't move, he just breathes softly. I squeeze my eyes shut and hold onto his hand, afraid he'll somehow slip from me again. Relieved is an understatement, I am whole again.
His scent swarms my nose and I want to nuzzle my face into his neck but I know better. He needs rest, he needs to be still. The thought of him being in pain has my stomach twisting and flipping like barbed wire is laced through my arteries.
If I could take away his pain, I would. I'd take every ounce of it. He doesn't deserve this. He never has and I want him to feel okay, to feel better.
I open my eyes and kiss his hand again, admiring his gorgeous face. "I love you," I whisper. "I love you endlessly."
My hand raises to wipe my tears with my other hand. I refuse to move, I will stay here until he wakes up. I don't care what anyone says.
Gemma approaches from behind me. "Are you okay, Luna?"
I nod, incapable of words.
"He's stable at the moment, we're unsure of when he will wake up. But we're keeping an eye on him. He's been through a lot of torment and been pushed to physical extremes. We know he will pull through but it's a matter of when." Her voice is soft, understanding and it puts me at ease.
"Thank you, Gemma."
"I'll be in my office if you need me. The other doctors will be coming around to check him soon."
I nod again and say nothing. Listening to Gemma's footsteps as she walks away. My eyes settle back on Kassian and I brush a hand through his hair and then gently down his cheek, feeling the softness of his skin beneath mine.
Oh how I wish to hold him in my arms and kiss every inch of his body. Douse him in love and affection until he feels better.
"I was scared I lost you," I whisper, watching my fingers against his cheek. "The thought of being without you fucking hurts. And I never want to feel like that again."
Kassian breathes softly and I hope somehow he can hear me. He can hear how much he is loved.
"We looked for you non-stop," I kiss his hand again. "We kept looking, we searched everywhere. I used Nella's powers to find you, we did everything we could. Even Fran and Everett helped out."
The room falls silent apart from the odd beep from the machine wired to his body.
"But you're home now," I say quietly against his chilly skin. "And that's all that matters."
I don't know how long I sit here for but I could sit here forever, just to be close to him. There is a presence behind me but I don't turn to look, I can tell it's Nella by the sweetness of her scent.
She stands behind me but I don't glance at her. "How are you feeling?"
"I'm fine," I say, keeping my eyes on Kassian.
"Is your ankle okay?"
"Feels fine." I'm lying. It doesn't. In fact it fucking kills. I should have healed but for some reason it's taking longer but I won't admit that.
Nella crouches down beside me. "You should get something to eat, Cleo. I can make you something. You've been asleep for nearly a day."
I shake my head. "I can't leave him. I can't."
A hand is pressed to my shoulder and I heave out a slow breath. "He's not going anywhere and the doctors are here, they're watching him. Making sure that he'll be okay. You can get some food, have a shower and then come straight back down."
"I can't."
"You can," her voice is gentle and I finally look over at her. Her brows softened and her eyes begging for me to listen to her. "Even for twenty minutes. I've made some soup, get some energy in you. You know it is what Kassian would want. He'd hate knowing you're neglecting yourself for him."
My heart clenches at her words. Kassian wouldn't want me to suffer, of course he won't. But leaving his side feels wrong, like I'm betraying him and leaving him alone after being alone for days on end.
"What soup did you make?"
The corners of her mouth flicks up. "Vegetable, of course. Is that okay?"
"Do we have any bread?"
"A fresh bloomer, all ready to be eaten." My stomach growls at her words and her eyes widen. "I think someone is pleased to eat."
"For five minutes," I mumble, turning back to Kassian and kissing his hand once more.
Nella holds her hands up in defence. "Hey, I was happy to get a minute out of you."
I follow Nella out of the infirmary and down the hall to the kitchen, pleased that no one else was currently occupying the space. "Sit," she orders and I do. I watch as she plates me up some piping hot soup and butters me some thick cut slices of bread.
She places it in front of me and I tuck in, Nella sits opposite and she doesn't pressure me to speak or bombard me with questions. She lets me sit and eat in silence which I was beyond grateful for, especially when my mind wanders back to Kassian every five seconds.
It doesn't take me long to demolish the soup and bread, leaving my bowl completely empty. "Thank you," I tell her gratefully. "I really needed that."
Nella smiles. "I know you did. Can't let my best friend go hungry now, can I?" I stand from the table and place my bowl into the dishwasher, Nella's eyes still firmly on me. "You should shower."
My lungs shoot out a breath and I place one hand onto the counter. "I know but I don't want to be away from Kassian."
She stands from her chair and approaches me. "He's not going anywhere, Cleo. He's here now, he's safe. The doctors said he will pull through, you don't need to beat yourself up about it anymore."
I watch her lips as she speaks and I draw in a slow breath, finally nodding. "I know."
Nella doesn't say anything more but offers me a hopeful smile.
"What happened? The day we went to go rescue him. I'm sure I passed out."
"You did," she nods, shoving her hands into her hoodie pockets. "You were completely unconscious. We had to carry you home. You scared me."
I chew down on my lip and rake a hand through my knotted hair, it definitely needs a wash. I can barely get my fingers through the strands. As does my body, I can feel dirt and blood stick to every crevice, making my stomach churn. "What about the rogues?"
"You killed the leader," Nella explains. "We sorted out the rest. None of them survived. We don't have to worry about them coming back for their revenge."
"Good," I exhale a sigh of relief. "That makes me feel a lot better. Are the pack okay? Did anyone else get hurt?"
Nella shakes her head. "Pack is fine," she comments, reducing the panic inside me. "A few got hurt but it's expected. Nothing they can't pull through with though. Think we're overdue some time off, we've been through it all."
I stifle a laugh. "You've got that right."
"Go take a shower."
"Okay," I don't even fight her on it. "Thank you again for the food."
Her head shakes as she dismisses herself. "Don't thank me for being a good friend."
When I reach our bedroom, it doesn't feel as haunting as before. Because I know he's here and we'll be sleeping in this bed again together soon. I just had to wait and that's fine. His scent isn't as strong as it once was, probably because my own scent has completely taken over. But the warmth is still there and it comforts me.
The shower is everything I needed and more. I don't know why I would want to put it off. Feeling clean and fresh reset my mind and now I couldn't wait to spend the rest of the evening beside Kassian.
I towel dry my hair and throw on some comfortable clothes and a thick jumper before heading back downstairs to the infirmary. As I loop around the corridor, I instantly see curly mousy brown hair and a little frame, looking into Kassian's room.
Ripley hears my footsteps and he whips his head around to me. His eyes soften when he realises that I'm awake. "Cleo," he says openly as I reach him.
My eyes float down to his cheek, a deep gash through his skin. I frown and cup the side of his face, gently moving my thumb to the outside of the wound. "Are you okay?" I ask as I inspect it.
"Fine, Gemma gave me some antibiotics and cream for it," he shakes it off like it's nothing.
I part my lips, feeling tears build behind my eyes. Dropping my hand, I pull his body into a tight hug and he wraps his arms around my back. "Thank you for all your help," I say as I place my chin on top of his head. "I am so proud of how far you've come."
Ripley releases a shaky breath and we pull away, his eyes are somewhat vacant. Like he's torturing himself in his mind. "What's the matter?"
He plays with his hands in front of him and closes his eyes in defeat. "I think I killed one of them."
My lips twitch downwards and I grab his hand. "And that's okay."
"I killed someone."
"You did it for Kassian, for me. You have no idea how grateful I am for you, for risking your life to save him." I dip my tone and his blue eyes finally turn to look up at me. "And I know how you're feeling. I know how I felt when I killed someone for the first time."
"You do?" He whispers.
I nod instantly. "That feeling doesn't go away but it gets better. I know it hurts, you feel awful. But you did it for a reason. If you didn't kill him, he would have killed you. You protected yourself. You didn't kill someone innocent, you killed someone who tried to kill Kassian. Our Alpha."
His shoulders raise once. "Guess I feel kinda guilty."
"And that is okay but it will get better with time. I promise you." I move forward to press a kiss against his forehead.
"I'm glad he's back," he offers me a sweet smile.
"Me too, Ripley. Me too."
"I'm glad you're okay too. I was scared I was going to lose you."
I smile gently and hold his face. "You're never going to lose me. Ever."
Ripley swallows and then nods. "I know I haven't had family for a little while but you're the closest person to me who feels like family."
My heart clenches tightly in the chest and I have a sudden urge to burst into tears. Knowing that my emotions have been everywhere since Kassian was taken but now it's happiness, pure happiness.
"You are my family," I say confidently to him. "Blood means nothing when we have a bond like ours."
Ripley smiles up at me and I ruffle his hair once. "I like that."
"Are you hungry?"
He nods. "Well Nella has made some banging soup. Go get some before it's all gone."
"Okay," he grins before walking back towards the kitchen.
I exhale deeply, letting my body sag slightly. That conversation made me feel a thousand times lighter and my heart has never felt so full. My eyes rotate back into the room and I look at Kassian laying against the bed.
My feet carry me to him instantly and I perch down on the floor, taking his hand in mine once more and stroking his skin gently. I kiss him over and over again until my lips feel numb and his skin feels somewhat warmer.
"I'm not going anywhere." I whisper with tears in my eyes. "I'm going to stay here until you wake up. Because I don't want you to wake up feeling alone. You're never going to be alone again."
. . .
Read the rest of the story and epilogues over on my Patreon early!
www.patreon.com/dreammcatcher
Link is also in bio!
Hello huns. Both our babies are going to be okay!
I love this tender side of Cleo, her care for Kassian and letting Nella take care of her. Even comforting Ripley, she is a boss of a woman!❤️
What did you guys think of this chapter?
I'd love to hear your thoughts!
I've written a short story about Ripley and his mate over on my Patreon, five parts to it! Available on Ruby tier and above.
I've also just posted Kassian and Cleo look after Arlo for tiers Amethyst and Sapphire if you guys want to check it out. Link in bio huns x
Hope everyone is well, love Savanna x
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