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CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
never changed fates
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Napangiwi ako sa estado ng paligid ng presinto na sumabay pa sa lasa ng kalawang sa bibig ko. Ang mata ko'y nakatuon lang sa isang lalaking nakaupo sa isang dulo ng lamesa na nagt-type sa computer niya. Ni hindi ko binigyang-pansin ang nagwawalang bruha sa harap ko na pinapakalma ng boyfriend niya.
Clacking sounds, foot stomping, the smell of orange freshener, the see-through tinted window beside us, and multiple complaints plus shouts of Quince around the room.
What a fucking good consequence for what I've done. I shouldn't have done it in the first place now that it has come to this. Many people are getting tied up now, and it seemed like I can't handle this anymore. I was all talk, no bite. I thought I could pull it; I thought I can unravel something from the constant confusion that's building up inside me; and I thought I can know the truth behind all of this.
"I'll sue you, you fucking whore!" 'Yan ang paulit-ulit na naririnig ko kay Quince bago siya inubo't binigyan ng tubig. Bibigyan din sana ako pero mabilis na pumagitna sa'min ng pulis ang abogado ko.
"Don't you dare give my client a glass of water." Malditang ani ni Alessa bago hinawi ang buhok na tumabing sa mukha niya. Napatingin sakanya ang iilang pulis kasama na ang kasamang lawyer ng mga taong nasa tapat namin pero isang taas lang ng kilay ay nagsi-iwasan sila ng tingin.
"Who called you to come here?" Tanong ko kay Alessa dahil wala akong may maalalang may tinawagan ako para puntahan ako rito sa presinto. Wala rin akong maalalang pumayag ako na makasama 'tong si Alessa, Quince, Gazer, at lawyer nila sa loob ng interrogation room dahil gusto raw nilang makapagusap kami nang masinsinan patungkol sa nangyaring gulo sa cafe.
"Un número desconocido me llamó a mi oficina diciendo que fuiste a la cárcel y que necesito sacarte la fianza por cualquier medio. Incluso si lo haré como un forajido." Sabi ni Alessa o tamang sabihin ay Attorney Alessa Navier Rocci, Vienna's older sister.
An unknown number called me in my office saying that you went to jail and I need to bail you out through any means. Even if I'll do it as an outlaw. She said in her native dialect because whatever conversation we have is recorded. She knew that she can't afford to let anyone here know anything about her plans.
Nagsalubong naman ang kilay ko. So my plan went to vain, huh? That anonymous person just called a friend of mine which they know will help me. Ang nakapagtataka lang ay kilala niya si Alessa at alam niya ang numero nito sa opisina. Alessa might be a friend of mine, but the last time we met was like a decade ago noong hindi pa siya naging independent mula sa pamilya nila sa Espanya. Kaya papaanong kilala siya ng anonymous investor na 'yun gayong hindi naman kami nagkikita?
Now that I think about it, there's this huge possibility out there that the anonymous investor knows me too much or might as well say that they know who the fuck am I from the core. They really are not someone I should underestimate.
Pagak akong tumawa, "Bien, joder. Supongo que realmente no puedo hacer nada con ese número desconocido." Well, fuck. I guess I really can't do anything about that unknown number?
"Anong sinabi niya?" Galit na tanong ni Quince sa harap namin na katulad ko ay magulo rin ang buhok, may konting punit ang damit, at may dugo sa labi. Pareho kaming parang baliw sa kalye lalo na't alam kong wala rin kaming sapatos.
Dumaan ang ilang minuto ay walang may sumagot sakanya.
"Quién eres tú?" Nagsalita si Gazer, ang mata niya't nakatutok kay Alessa na bahagyang nagulat sa pagsasalita niya ng Espanyol at pagtatanong kung anong pangalan niya.
Kahit ako ay nagulat dahil wala sa alaala kong nag-aral siya niyan but then again, if his family are holding a few of my companies then they should've known that I have international stockholders and business partners that they should talk to. Kaya siguro siya nag-aral ng ibang lenggwahe.
I nearly chuckled. That just means that in those four years that I wasn't there, he may have been learning how to flourish my companies in his hands. Malas niya lang dahil babawiin ko ang lahat ng nasa kamay niya.
"I'm Alessa Navier Rocci, Aster's lawyer." Pakilala ni Alessa ng may seryosong ekspresyon sa mukha. Hindi ko rin maiwasang hindi ipakita na kampante ako lalo na't walang palya ang tindig ni Alessa sa gilid ko. Parang pinapakita niyang kayang-kaya niyang talunin sa korte ang abogado nina Gazer na kasalukuyan din siyang pinapasadahan ng tingin.
"So, you're Miss Rocci?" Tanong ng lawyer habang inaayos ang eyeglasses niya.
"There are two 'Miss Rocci' around this world. Do call me 'Alessa'." Propesyonal na pakilala niya pa bago nilahad ang kamay.
"Yvan Fervoroso, private lawyer of the Vuerreros..." Pagtanggap ng lalaki sa kamay niya bago ngumisi, "La heredera."
Napasinghap na binawi ni Alessa ang kamay niya. Kami naman ngayon nina Quince at Gazer ang napakunot ang noo. He just called her 'heiress' out of nowhere. Is that a play to make her lose her focus?
"Let's start the interrogation. I'm Inspector Colton Taverez." Ani ng lalaking kanina pa tahimik sa dulo ng lamesa. Tumikhim siya saglit bago ngumiti sa'min.
Buryo ko siyang tinignan, "I provoked her into a fight by saying that I fucked her boyfriend, end of story. Pwede niyo na ko ikulong ngayon pa lang."
"Aster." Saway ni Alessa.
Tumawa ang lawyer ni Gazer, "Is that what really happened, Quince?"
Nanlilisik ang matang tinignan ako ni Quince pero humalukipkip lang ako at pinagkrus ang braso sa dibdib ko. Bahala siya riyan. Punong-puno na ko at mas lalong pagod na ko mula sa away namin.
"She's lying, Quince. Nothing happened." Kalmadong sabi ulit ni Gazer pero winaksi lang siya ng isa.
"Yes, I lied about it. Now, you ruined your career or maybe reputation, and that boyfriend of yours might fire me out of my job. Now, I promise to get out of your way. So, done. Ikulong niyo na lang ako for obstruction of property, damage of property, etcetera." Kinampay ko ang kamay ko pataas to point out my concern bago tumawa, "Can we just get this done? I want to rest, be it behind bars or my bed. Either will do basta makapagpahinga ako."
Nanahimik silang lahat. Ang inspector ay napahilamos ang mukha, si Quince naman ay galit pa ring nakatingin sa'kin, walang emosyon si Gazer, natatawa ang lawyer na si Yvan, at ang abogado ko naman ay nandidilim na ang paningin sa'kin.
"I just need a minute with my client." Ani Alessa bago ako tinapik sa balikat.
"Attorney Rocci, you can't le-."
"Dije que necesito un maldito minuto con mi cliente." I said I need a fucking minute with my client. Pinal na putol niya sa inspektor at walang-pakundangan akong hinila palabas ng kwarto kung nasaan ang iilang pulis at sina... Vienna?
Nangunot ang noo ko, "Why are you here?"
"Puta? 'Yan talaga bungad mo pagkatapos naming kanselahin lahat para lang puntahan ka rito?" Sarkastikong tanong ni Vienna na agad sinaway ni Alessa.
Hindi-makapaniwala ko siyang tinignan, "I never told you to come here! Why are you even here?! Who the hell called you?! That unknown number?!"
"Qué carajo? Vinimos aquí porque estamos preocupados y así es como nos saludarán?!" What the fuck? We came here because we're worried and this is how you'll greet us?! Napatayo si Vienna pero agad siyang kinalma ni Solace. Natigilan naman ako bigla.
"Aster. God, don't fight. Are you okay?!" Nag-aalalang nilapitan ako ni Solace bago sinipat ang buong katawan ko, tumigil saglit ang tingin niya sa posas sa kamay ko. Ganu'n din si Paris at Aya. Si Vienna ay naupo lang ulit habang paulit-ulit na umiirap. Nandito rin si Avi na malungkot ang tingin sa'kin.
Nasa likod silang lahat 'nung tinted na bintana kung saan kami nakaupo kanina, at kung saan makikita sina Quince at Gazer na nag-aaway ulit ngayon. Rinig na rinig ang bangayan nila rito pero hininaan ng isang pulis ang intercom dahil inutusan siya ni Alessa. 'Give them a private space,' she said. Ang ilan sakanila ay pinakiusapan niya ring umalis muna pero hinayaan niyang manatili ang isang pulis para raw bantayan kami.
"What is happening to you, Aster?" Solace asked.
I chuckled, "What do you mean? Nothing is happening. I'm just asking you why you're here because there's literally nothing to fucking see."
Pansin kong napatayo si Vienna sa sinabi ko pero agad siyang hinarangan ng kapatid. Sa huli ay umupo ulit siya habang paulit-ulit akong minumura sa dayalekto niya.
"What the hell. Nothing? Oh, c'mon, you hate that word. Something is definitely happening." Ani ulit ni Solace.
I sighed, "It's nothing. Just a small fight. Just leave. I'll fix this."
"Ese cabrón desagradecido! Ver?! Es terca como el infierno!" That ungrateful cunt! See?! She's stubborn as hell! Sigaw ni Vienna mula sa kabilang dako ng kwarto.
"God, Aster!" Singhal ni Paris, "You're trending on the internet as a victim of this Quince influencer and there are rumors that you provoked her by saying that you fucked his boyfriend. Narinig kayo ng kabilang table sa cafe ni Callista and even though Calli isn't even here in the Philippines, she almost left her job and booked a flight just to go home. Mabuti at pinigilan siya ni Vienna! Can't you put more feelings in this?! We're fucking worried!"
Nagulantang si Solace at Vienna. Minsanan lang naman din kasi si Paris magmura at nangyayari lang 'yun kapag nadadala siya ng emosyon.
"What do you mean?" Anas ko.
"Zahara who's currently out of the country saw quite a lot of videos of you in the internet. She cancelled all of her appointments just to check on us here. Even Avelle insisted to come here pero pinigilan siya namin dahil alam naming hindi niya pwedeng maiwan ang anak niya. Maeve called from outside the country asking where are you because she's shocked by seeing you in the news, and now she's currently erasing all the spreading videos of you in the internet. Muntikan na rin niyang sirain ang broadcasting software ng mga TV companies para lang huwag ka kumalat, Aster. Even Callista is helping her do that now." Pagpapatuloy niya dahil tahimik lang si Solace, Vienna, Aya, at Avi na nakatingin sa'kin... sa'min.
"At least be more..." Malungkot niya akong nginitian, "Be more wary about what we'll feel as your friend. Not like it's your responsibility but don't push us away."
"Maeve also told us about the things you're planning to do with her so you can get your company back. Slip of tongue from her because I spoke, and we all know that she's scared of me, right?" Tumayo si Vienna, "Qué diablos estás planeando, Aster? Juramos ayudarte pero te estas adelantando a todos. Cuáles son los amigos para ti exactamente?"
What the fuck are you planning, Aster? We swore to help you but you're getting ahead of all of us. What are friends for you exactly? She said. Sumikip ang dibdib ko sa sinabi niya lalo na ang dismayadong ekspresyon ni Paris na ngayon ko lang nakita.
"Cállate, Viena." Saway ni Alessa sa kapatid pero isang nanlilisik na tingin lang ang iginawad ni Vienna. She just told her younger sister to shut up and Vienna hates that so much.
"No te atrevas a callarme! Me duele mucho escuchar que yo estaba dispuesto a ayudarla como su mejor amiga, pero ella optó por ocultar sus problemas y resolverlos por su cuenta!" Don't you dare shut me up! It hurts so much to hear that I was ready to help her as her bestfriend but she chose to hide her problems and resolve it on her own! Inis na sigaw ni Vienna.
"Eres su mejor amigo, pero sigues menospreciándola cuando ya se perdió en la desesperación!" You're her best friend but you keep putting her down when she already lost in despair! Sigaw din ng nawala sa wisyo na si Alessa.
Vienna scoffed, "Se puso en esa situación sin usar su maldito cerebro!" She put herself in that situation without using her fucking brain!
"Vienna! Alessa!" Saway ni Paris na agad pumagitna nang akmang sasampalin ni Alessa si Vienna, "This isn't the right time for that. Aster needs us now! Ano ba kayo?!"
Isang buntong-hininga ang pinakawalan ni Alessa habang si Vienna naman ay padabog na bumalik sa pagkakaupo. Natulala ako sa maliit na away nilang muntikan na lumaki dahil sa sinabi ni Vienna pero mas lalo akong nasaktan sa katotohanan ng sinabi niya.
She's right. I chose to do this all alone like always even though they're present to help. And now they're here to watch how I face the consequences. I wasn't even thinking that what I did will cause a huge impact not only to me but for the people around me, especially to them - to my friends. I don't want to be a burden, but now I'm one. Nagpadala ako sa emosyon at ideya na makapaghiganti at malaman sino ang nasa likod ng sinabi ni Gazer. Nagmadali akong malaman ang totoo.
"Aster, I know you're thinking that you're a burden but you're not, okay? You have never been and you never will when it comes to us. You have me, you have us here. We're ready to help whenever and wherever you are. All we're asking you is don't keep anything from us because we're ready to listen. What are friends for if we can't do something as minimal as that?" Pagkausap sa'kin ni Solace bago ngumiti, "It's not just a fight of your own, you know."
Tumayo si Avi kahit nahihiya sa presensya ng mga nakakatanda, "Ate Aster, alam kong nagtataka kayo bakit ako nandito but when I knew that Aya went here with you, sumunod ako mula sa Cadiz without my parent's consent again, ate. Hindi pa sinabi ni Aya sa'yo pero nag-renta rin ako ng unit malapit sa inyo kasi nalaman kong buntis si Aya tapos plano mo sana siyang tulungan mag-isa. Binisita ko siya 'nung sakto umalis ka kahapon tapos sinabihan ko siyang i-sikreto lang ang pagsunod ko sa inyo kasi tutulong sana ako sa'yo. Sinasamahan ko si Aya sa apartment kasi pangit naman kung mag-isa lang siya. 'Yun sana gagawin kong pambawi sa pagtago mo ng relasyon namin ni Caliem noon kahit na... wala na kami ngayon."
Binulong niya ang huling bahagi ng sinabi niya pero narinig pa rin namin 'yun. Hindi ko maiwasang manlambot sa sinabi niya. Kaya pala parang wala lang kay Aya na gabi na ako nakauwi kahapon, kasama niya pala 'yung isa pa naming pinsan.
"See? You're not alone." Solace chuckled, "We're here. A lot of us are. So, don't keep anything away from us anymore, okay? Don't just say 'bahala na' whenever you're in a crisis. Stop being too selfless."
Nanlambot ako nang tuluyan. Sumikip ang dibdib ko sa sinabi niya kaya hindi ko na naiwasang hindi maluha. Itinaas ko pa ang nakaposas kong kamay para mabilis na punasan ang luha ko pero mabilis na humablot si Paris ng panyo para punasan ang luha ko't yakapin ako. Mas lalo akong napahagulhol. Ilang minuto pa kaming nagtagal sa ganu'ng estado bago ko naisipang kumalma.
"It'a almost night. I ditched all of my plans today to come here with you so you should tell me. What is the meaning of this, Aster? Why are you doing this for? We all know you won't do something as reckless and irresponsible as this. You have a reason and es mejor que lo digas." You better say it. Vienna glared at me even though her voice is soft.
Suminghot ako saglit bago sila tinignan lahat. I even asked Alessa a permission kasi alam kong matatagalan kami kaya tumango lang siya bago sumandal sa pintuan ng interrogation room. Tinignan ko rin ang kalbong pulis sa gilid namin na walang kibo kahit kanina pa kami nagd-drama sa harap niya.
Sa huli ay ngumiti ako bago kwinento ang lahat simula 'nung nagkakilala kami ni Gazer, sa nangyari sa'min four years ago, sa nangyari kay Aya, at sa anonymous investor ngayon. I summarized everything to them even though they already know some of it's details. Sinabay ko rin ang sana'y plano ko para makuha ko ulit ang kumpanya ko at ang nangyari ngayon. Wala akong may iniwang bakas ng kasinungalingan.
"My conclusion? You're jealous," Agad na sabi ni Vienna, "You never lose your composure before, Aster. Not you of all people. The devastation got through you, of course, but you won't do something as scandalous as that especially to someone you don't even know well. You could've drag anyone but you chose Gazer's girlfriend of all people. You're just jealous and a Goddess of En Negacion."
"En Negacion?" Tanong ni Avi.
"Indenial." Sabay naming sagot ni Vienna at Alessa.
I thinned my lip bago pinaalala ang nangyari sa 7/11 at kung paano ko ulit nakabangga si Gazer ro'n dahil sa kapatid niya, "If I can do something as scandalous as punching Caliem's friend, I can do that to his older brother's girlfriend, too."
"That doesn't add up. You were tired back then but now? Sabi mo kararating mo lang sa opisina nu'n at kalmado ka pa nga kahit sinampal ka na. Tapos 'nung nasa cafe, naisipan mong galitin siya? Sus, reasons." Pagpupumilit ni Vienna habang iniirapan ako kasi tama raw ang konklusyon niya na agad sinang-ayunan ni Aya.
Napasimangot ako.
"Well, did you guys really fuck?" Tanong ng inosenteng si Paris na agad kong inilingan.
"Sinungaling ka, ate. Sabi 'nung nagdala sa'yo pinagod ka raw ng boss mo." Nagtaas ng kilay si Aya.
Awang ang bibig na nilingon ako ng mga kaibigan ko kaya agad akong umiling, "That didn't happen! I told you something just happened yesterday!" Kainis!
"Then why did you say that he fucked you?!" Solace beamed.
Ngumuso ako, "It's not even about what I feel or what happened! I just thought getting myself in trouble will make that anonymous investor show themselves up. But they didn't. Instead, they called Alessa which I have no contact in for almost a decade. That's why everything is confusing me right now. How did that anonymous investor know about Alessa?"
"We can ask Maeve or Callista to track down the number." Suhestiyon ni Solace.
"El negativo." Negative. Sagot ni Alessa, "The number is out of service now."
"It's Maeve we're talking about. She can track even the last whereabout of the number so just give it."
Walang nagawa si Alessa kung hindi ibigay ang numero kay Solace. Agad naman itong pinadala ni Solace sa isa at wala pang sampung minuto ay agad na tumawag si Maeve pabalik.
Ngumisi si Solace, "Told 'ya," bago sinagot ang tawag at in-on ang loudspeaker. Agad na bumungad sa'min ang malakas na tunog ng paghampas sa kung anong bagay.
"This is fucking crazy. Really fucking crazy. Aster, whoever you're dealing with is not just fucking someone." Natatawa pero kinakabahang sabi ni Maeve sa kabilang linya. Rinig din ang pagtipa niya sa keyboard bago namin marinig ang pagbukas ng isang inumin.
"Why?" Sabat ni Paris.
"I know this may sound impossible, but the last whereabouts of the number before it went out of service were in Callista's cafe. Callista's fucking cafe. It shut down several minutes right after a video of you went viral. Whoever has this fucking number is with you all those times, Aster! Unbelievable!"
Nanlaki ang mata ko. Natahimik kaming lahat habang sinusulyapan ang isa't-isa. Binalot ako ng takot at gimbal sa narinig pero hindi ako nagpatianod. Sinubukan kong mag-isip habang sunod-sunod na inaalala lahat ng mukha sa cafe ni Callista na maaaring maging anonymous investor pero wala. Walang may kahina-hinalang tao ro'n kaya imposible... imposibleng nando'n siya.
"Teka, sigurado ka ba, Maeve?" Tanong ni Vienna. Kalmado lang siyang tignan pero alam kong kahit siya ay nagulat.
"S-sigurado ako! I even went through Alessa's inbox and log calls, and then saw that the unknown number already called her way before the time na tumawag si Callista sa'kin para ipaalam na nasa kulungan si Aster!" Nagp-panic niyang dagdag.
"You know I can sue you for going through my phone, Maeve, right?" Alessa warned Maeve pero suminghal lang ang isa sa kabilang linya.
"Sue me for all I care! It's Aster we're helping here! She has a fucking creep under her nose! I'm more than worried for her than being behind iron fucking bars!"
Kinilabutan ako lalo. Nablangko nang tuluyan ang isip ko sa sinabi niya at ang tanging binabalik-balikan lang ng utak ko ay ang nangyari sa cafe.
That person just predicted my every move. They know what I was gonna do and immediately took action to lessen the damage that it'll cause under my name. They know how I think, they know me damn well, and they even took care of it earlier than I predicted without showing their faces to me. They fucking care... at ganu'n din halos lahat ng tao sa paligid ko ngayon kaya hindi ko maisip na sila 'yung anonymous investor na 'yun o 'di kaya'y tinutulungan na nila ako nang maaga. All without showing their face. I hate to say this but they outsmarted me... they're a genius for all I've known.
"Aster!"
Napasinghap ako.
"Do you have any idea who this might be? Someone obsessing over you or what?" Tanong ni Vienna na sinagot ko ng maghinang iling.
Wala akong maisip, wala akong may konklusyong mahinuha, wala akong may masabi. Wala akong may mahanap na kahit ano. Blangko lang.
"They know my office's number, my firm's fucking number, girls. They could've been near our building. I might look out there again to see who's lurking. Let's find that stalker." Presenta ni Alessa bago may tinawagan, "And you, Maeve, get off my phone."
"Aye aye. I'll help, too!" Sabi rin ni Maeve.
At naging sunod-sunod na ang pagp-plano nilang tumulong. Pinalitan din nila ang pangalan ng 'anonymous investor' to 'stalker'. Umiling lang ako nang umiling sa mga plano nila.
"No..." I whispered na agad nilang ikinatingin sa'kin, lalo na si Vienna.
"You're refusing our help again? Really?" Sarkastiko niyang tanong.
"No... Vienna... I..."
"What?!" She shrieked kaya hinampas siya ni Solace hanggang sa nagbangayan silang dalawa pero parang sarado na ang pandinig ko ro'n.
Aksidente kong narinig ang tila static noise ng intercom kaya napatingin ako sa tinted window at sa lalaking nakatayo na lang sa gilid ni Quince. Kalmado lang siya, tila naghihintay kung anong sunod na gagawin. Sa sobrang tikas ng tindig at pagkawalang-emosyon ng mukha niya ay iisipin mong wala siyang problema, na tila ayos lang kahit masira ang reputasyon ng babaeng kanina niya pa inaalo, at parang wala lang kahit halos magpatayan kami basta ba wala siyang masyadong kinalaman kung hindi ang kasinungalingang sinabi ko kay Quince.
"Aster!" Tawag ni Vienna na katulad ng iba ay parang naghihintay sa sagot ko pero bumalik lang ulit ang tingin ko kay Gazer.
Pinanood ko sila at pansin kong may sinabi ang inspektor na siyang nagpatayo kay Quince't nagpasigaw. Pero hindi sakanya natuon ang buong atensyon ko kung hindi sa unti-unting pagngiti ni Gazer na animo'y nasisiyahan sa nakikita.
"Come to think of it, are you sure you've never seen your stalker or their face, ate? There are stalkers who show themselves up sometimes, not just hide until the one they're admiring notices," Rinig kong sabi ni Avi, "I had one before. I knew his face and it turned out that he's stalking me. Creepy!"
Right... right.
How could've I ignored all possible evidences when he's right beside my wing? How could've I turned a blind eye on the possibility? How could've I ever believed him when he already fooled me before?
To take down the roots? To take down his Father? Bullshit.
He had always been there. He's present. He was everywhere I didn't expect him to be. It's connected to him, everything is just correlating to him and now? Everything is just pointing to him.
"Gazer..." I whispered.
"Aster!" Niyugyog nila ako, "Kinakausap ka namin!"
"It's Gazer..." Tumingin ako sakanila, nanlalaki ang mata.
Taka silang tumingin sa'kin, "Ano 'yun?"
"The stalker..." Nanginginig ang labi ko, "T-the stalker... it's Gazer..."
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Any hunch who might be the stalker or anonymous investor? Is it really even Gazer?