CHAPTER TWELVE
ʟᴀɴᴅsʟɪᴅᴇ
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By thursday evening, Rosalie wasn't ready. She didn't ever think she would be ready to meet the human who had stolen her brother's heart. Wouldn't be able to accept the fact that their dynamic was changing, becoming riskier. Only briefly had the thought sprung upon her that maybe it was about time they became more ingrained within the human world. They were already enrolled in high school, collecting diplomas as easily as dust, with Carlisle performing medical procedures as if the scent of blood was simply unpleasing rather than something his being was supposed to crave so desperately. But those thoughts had been shaken off too swiftly and with too much ease because Rosalie wasn't ready.
She wasn't prepared for the change, wasn't prepared to risk all they'd built for one human girl, no matter how pretty and how charming Edward might find her. Forks was their home so long as they kept control. It was written into the treaty that let them remain there and return again, and the shapeshifters were getting close to their trails, no doubt growing wary of their actions. It almost made her feel claustrophobic, those thoughts of everything going wrong too rapidly.
Bella's scent had already become familiar, enveloping her brother and all of his possessions like a perfume. The scent now was overpowering as the girl made her way through the house on the floor below. Rosalie closed her eyes and tucked further into herself, arms wrapping smoothly around her knees. Emmett sat beside her, his baseball being tossed from hand to hand. Something about the dull, rhythmic sound was comforting, grounding. Just like Emmett.
"It's alright, Rosie. Edward told you to take all the time you need," he said, eyes flitting to watch as she fussed with the opal ring on her middle finger. He knew she hated that nickname. It was likely that he wanted her to snap at him, remind him of the fact that it was too ugly sounding, but she didn't and he frowned.
"I know, it's just... it's all too fast," she muttered, trying hard not to zone in on the conversations that happened below.
Emmett let out a hum and grabbed her hand in his, stopping her fidgeting. It didn't stop her thoughts though.
Rosalie didn't understand Edward. She listened to him, sure, to all his arguments and the desires he spoke about so plainly, but she didn't understand him, couldn't comprehend how he could be so reckless. Rosalie would never do as he was, would never bring a human to the house, would never introduce Violet to her family as if it was an initiation.
But that was different, wasn't it? Violet was not like Bella. Her blood and Violet herself did not call to Rosalie, making her desperate in need, like Bella was to Edward. Rosalie did not want Violet in the way Edward wanted Bella.
But didn't she?
No.
Rosalie's mind whirled at miles to the second. Too fast for her to keep up. She couldn't think like that. Couldn't think of Violet and her gingery brown hair and her infectious laugh at a time like this. Not even when it was the only thing that could calm her down.
"What is it that upsets her?" Bella's voice drifted up the stairs, filling the room, even though the girl was trying to be quiet. She probably didn't even know Rose hid upstairs.
She heard Edward exhale slowly as if it was difficult to explain.
"Rosalie struggles the most with... with what we are. It's hard for her to have someone on the outside know the truth. And she's a little jealous."
Rosalie squeezed her eyes shut again, ignoring the dip to her stomach. For once she couldn't even feel angry.
"Rosalie is jealous of me?"
She almost laughed at that. It might've been flattering, had Rose not known what Edward would say next.
"You're human. She wishes that she were too."
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Violet let out a scream as the door to her Jeep swung open, almost making her topple from the vehicle to the workshop floor. The face that stared down at her, eyes looking backwards from the awkward angle she rested at, did not look apologetic. A hand found her shoulder and tugged her upward.
"Why are we up this early?" Jacob explained, hair hanging limply around his tired face. Even with his eyes rounded like an owl's, he looked weary. She wondered briefly if the expression on his face was curated to make her feel guilty, but Violet only laughed.
"I have an hour spare before school. I want to see what's so wrong with this car you're fixing," she said, using his hand to pull herself up. "I promised your dad."
It was still dark, being early morning, and the trees that surrounded the garage were tall enough to block the watery rays of dawn, but Violet found her way easily around her little section of the workshop, letting her hands find the strap of her school bag. Her dad sat in the front office, flicking through his pile of paperwork. The radio sounded brand new from where it was playing by the back door.
"You're serious about helping with that?" Jacob asked as they waved to Mr Green and slid below the old metal shutters, readying to brace the rain.
"It's either that or your dad doesn't get the car."
"Hey, I could fix it fine on my own!"
She could barely hear his shout from beneath the sound of clattering rain, the water dripping through her clothes in only a few short seconds. Even the clang of the door to Jacob's truck was muffled by the sound of the weather as a sharp howl of wind shook the vehicle.
"Then why haven't you?"
He blinked at her for a moment, before remembering what they'd been talking about, and scowled. "You're lucky my dad likes you."
Violet waited to speak until he'd pulled away from the garage and was driving steadily down the blurry road.
"Or what?"
"Or I'd stop the car and make you get out," he said, the glare eventually softening to indifference.
With white knuckles, Violet clutched the bottom of her seat as the car stuttered lightly as Jacob went up a gear. It was her turn to whip around to him, glowering as he wiggled around with the gear stick.
"Are you even old enough to have your license?"
"I can drive perfectly fine, thank you," Jacob scoffed, speeding up slightly as proof.
"That didn't answer the question!"
Yet despite the lack of legality in Jacob's driving, they made it to Billy Black's small house in one piece. The man was waiting on the edge of the porch, a tartan blanket resting over his legs in the wheelchair. He was smiling as they walked up.
"Nice to see there might actually be some progress with the old heap, now," he said, earning a groan from his son.
"Really, dad?"
"Go on, you haven't got much time before school."
After giving it a swift once over, Violet had come to the conclusion that Jacob had probably done the car more harm than good. The wheels were off, ready to be replaced, and each joint was rusted near-red. The engine lay in bits on a table across the barn.
"How the bell have you managed this?"
Jake let out an offended scoff and pushed himself from the wall, crossing his arms. "It's not that bad."
"Not that bad," Violet grumbled, mocking him lightly before she grabbed the younger boy's arm, pulling him forward. "Come on, we start from the inside out."
Jacob's truck skidded to a stop in front of the school, the worn tires screeching loudly. Violet cringed, eyeing his easy grip on the wheel, only to receive a glare in return. It was a surprise his dad had even let him out in the car, with the way he drove around the streets as if he had nine lives.
"If you're going to complain, get out now," Jacob said, voice annoyed, but there was a smile on his face.
"I didn't say anything," Violet said, digging her heels into the floor and lying her head flat against the seat.
"You didn't need to. Your face said enough."
"Fine, I'm leaving," Violet said, holding her hands up in defeat. "Just know you've forced me to be alone for this next fifteen minutes. Celia had morning class."
"Cry me a river!" Jake shouted after her and Violet scowled again, reaching to throw the door to the truck open so she could hop out. The boy let out a loud goodbye and then drove away as quickly as he arrived, not giving her a single moment to say anything more. She wondered if this was what it would have been like to have a brother.
Unsure of what to do, she watched the truck leave until it swung around the corner, disappearing behind the thick bushes. The car park was almost full, despite the fact that the bell would not ring for another ten minutes. But amongst the duplicate silver cars, all appearing like Celia's, it was the sleek black sports car that caught her eye- just as it always did.
The Cullens emerged from the car gracefully, Alice's arm tugging Jasper along, Emmett tossing a football around, never dropping it. Rosalie was last to climb out, blonde hair falling easily over her shoulder as she cast one look to lock the BMW. Her eyes glazed the car park lazily, following her family at a short distance. Her scan stopped only momentarily to rest of Violet, who smiled as she always would. There was no change to Rose's expression- no twitch to her lips nor crease of her eyes. The girl turned as if it was a ghost she'd glanced upon, and walked on.
During first period, Violet waited. Rosalie didn't show up as she had the last five lessons. During the half an hour they had as a break, her eyes wouldn't lift from their bored gaze on her fingernails as they might've another day, meeting in the middle with a ghost of a smile. There was a shift in the air, something cool laying in between. Violet had no clue what that meant.
At lunch, Rosalie glanced her way, the table bare of food to take her attention. Violet smiled again, Celia's focus following to the Cullens' table as she usually would, but the blonde only turned her head and looked away, acting as if the typical rain that trickled down the windowpane was the most interesting thing she'd ever seen.
Celia noticed this.
"What's with this ice I'm feeling from Rosalie? Since when was that a thing?" Celia asked, eyeing in between the two.
Violet only shrugged and turned so she would no mistake of looking at the girl again.
"It's not. I don't know. I just thought..." Violet let out a frustrated huff of air. Celia only waited patiently for her to continue. "I don't know what I thought. I don't know what I was thinking. That maybe Rosalie would like me? Want to be friends?"
Celia frowned but didn't say anything.
"Whatever. I know not to bother anymore. What about you? How's your sister?"
"You're not switching this to me! I've talked plenty about my sister and her stupid boyfriend. Go talk to her!" Celia said, almost shoving her friend from the table.
"What? No! Not when the rest of the Cullens are sitting round her like bodyguards."
"So you'll accept that you will confront her? Just not now?"
"I'll talk to her when the bell goes, is that good enough?" Violet sighed as she stood up, grabbing her lunch tray, only to glance up again to see Celia beaming as wide as if it was Christmas.
Violet kept her promise.
"You're ignoring me," Violet swiped, blocking her pathway down the hall. The girl regretted the sharp words the moment they left her lips. A voice so harsh would only push her away further.
"I'm not ignoring you."
Rosalie had in fact being ignoring the girl. It started in the morning, before the first bell had even rang. It was Jacob Black's rusty old truck that swung Violet into school that morning, rather than her friend Celia's, and Rose had been reminded for a second time of the girl's closeness to the pack. She hadn't shown up to help with her mechanics project as she had done before, either, and in the cafeteria she hadn't spared her a single glance.
Alice noticed of course. That had only annoyed her sister even more than she already was. The black dress she'd made specifically for Rosalie was still held under lock and key, and the lack of 'decency' in not showing her face to Bella the other evening at the house had made it easy for Alice to give her sister the silent treatment.
"You clearly are!" Violet said loudly, frustrated with cheeks flushed pink. A fresh wave of blood scented air rushed Rosalie's way.
"For me to ignore you I would have had to be talking to you in the first place," Rosalie said.
From down the corridor she could hear Jasper's short and the sharp slap Alice gave to his arm. The glare her sister was sending her was hot enough to be felt even at such a distance. Rosalie only straightened her shoulders, standing taller, acting the unbothered bitch as she usually would, and watched as Violet went still, her anger festering and then dying into mere annoyance and perhaps disappointment.
"Really. Well, that's a slap in the face," Violet said, words slow and somewhat quiet. "Here's me thinking I could have called you at the very least a friend after, you know, fixing your car and you helping with my project. Whatever."
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Rosalie's favourite BMW pulled easily out of the driveway, the engine revving loud enough to warn the rest of the house of her departure. The car had a steady sort of hum that could be called comforting only to Rose. Too often, Alice had complained about the noise, no matter the fact that her pink beetle moaned and groaned and had the scuttle of a forty year old smoker. Emmett's Jeep had to be the loudest too, but it seemed that Rosalie was the only one hearing the small girl's complaints at that moment of time.
For a moment she wondered if it was just Emmett and his Jeep that had such a loud scream whenever he went through the thinnest part of the forest with it. Vaguely, she recalled the old thing that'd sat in the garage, perhaps now painted green as a passion project of Violet Green. It was a cheap looking thing, the doors only just hanging on by the hinges, but unlike most of the cars that slept in the Cullens' vast garage, it was made and looked after with love. Something Rosalie could appreciate, even if she was ignoring the girl who'd cared for her own car as if it was her Jeep.
Rose was trying not to think about her. About the confused look that's crossed Violet's face every time she'd turned from her without a flash of the smallest of smiles. Tried not to think of the anger the other girl would feel, about the disappointment she would soon lose and forget, just as she would forget Rosalie. It pained her not to think of turning left instead of right at the end of the long, winding driveway- speeding her way to the garage to find Violet and her Jeep- wondering what she would say when she arrived. Wondering if she would be surprised.
The rumble of another engine met her ears, and by the pathetically quiet sound of it, the car must've been Edward's. Rosalie pressed her foot down on the accelerator, swinging around the corner of the driveway, hoping to leave before he had time to pass her, but as she did so, Edward came speeding the other way, blocking her entirely, and Rosalie was forced to slam down the breaks. The car came to an abrupt stop in front of Edward's, the two facing each other directly. When Rose finally worked up the nerve to glance up at him, Edward's hand was raised- he was waving.
Rose bit back a growl, shifted her gears, and pressed down on the accelerator, letting the car rev.
You know I'd hit you if it wouldn't mess my car up.
Edward smiled at her thoughts. "You heard about the game I guess," he said and Rosalie let out a deep sigh.
Just let me go, Edward. Emmett will stay. That's enough, isn't it?
"Please?"
She felt a shift in the air then. It was minute, almost indiscernible, but Rosalie could feel it easily. She knew her brother well, by now, and knew when he was genuine in his asking of things, and this time was one of them. Rosalie let her eyes fall closed. He was asking so much of her so quickly.
I don't understand why this is so important to you.
"You're important to me, Rose."
Everyone will have more fun without me.
Edward shrugged in response and Rosalie's eyebrows twitched. That confirmation hurt, just a little.
I won't be nice.
She'd thought the same around Violet, when she'd dragged her to take part in the mechanics project, only to end up arriving willingly. Rose wondered if perhaps that was the trajectory her relationship with Bella was on.
"I don't require nice. I only asked for toleration," Edward said, his voice now filled with less hesitation. "It won't be that bad. Maybe you'll win the game soundly and make me look bad."
Fighting back a smile, Rose nodded. She did love those games- especially when she won.
I get Emmett and Jasper.
"Deal," Edward said, now grinning albeit in a smaller manner. "Nothing is going to happen tonight, Rose. She's not making any decisions. She's just going to watch us play a game, that's all. Think of it as an experiment."
In that.. it might blow up?
"If it doesn't work, we'll regroup and come up with another solution," he said, but didn't move to start his car again to let her leave. Rose revved her engine a second time.
I have something to do first.
"Invite Violet," Edward said casually as he finally pulled his car to the side, letting his sister snake past. "Might make this all easier."
Rose felt her guards unwillingly build back up as his words reached her ears. In those conversations, when conversations were spoken half in her head, it was difficult to keep him out of the rest of her thoughts, even if Rosalie was the most practiced out of all of them of doing so. She remembered the first months of her second life, when she'd still had the strength of a newborn, and how her mind had been so impenetrable that Edward had thought it a gift. But then her thoughts had been too raw, too fresh, too revealing. Back then her thoughts had never left that night. Not even Edward had been so pressing as to see that through her eyes.
Now she was slipping, the immediate images in her head being brought easily to the surface. He would no doubt see Violet's face, sweet and rounded and warm, and hear her breathy voice, a ghost of a recent conversation, her words abrupt and hurt.
"I'm tolerating you right now Edward," she said, a glare sitting pointedly on her face as she swerved by his small, silver car. "Don't make this harder than it need be."
But a smile threatened her lips as she finally pulled away, watching carefully as Edward did the same. If she could promise to tolerate Bella and the girl's recklessness, then she could refrain from ignoring the only human she felt some resemblance of comfort around. Perhaps it did not matter that she was close with the wolves, would call them friend. The Cullen family would not be in town forever, would not be at risk of the rest of their eternal lives, and so perhaps Rose could find... a friend in Violet Green.
The car pulled up easily onto the side of the road, past the string of broken cars that littered the small clearing that was nestled amongst the trees. The slam of her door was loud amongst the silence and Rosalie walked slowly up to the garage, avoiding the front door and the sound of a man's singing in favour of slipping around the back to where she knew the smaller workshop was situated.
Rosalie thought of what Edward said, there as she found her way to Violet Green. Imagined herself as Edward and Violet as Bella and wondered if she could put her family in such danger as her brother was doing. If she could risk Violet like that too. Wondered if it was in the same way she felt about Violet as Edward did about Bella.
She imagined her out on the field like Edward suggested and almost snorted. Her gingery-blonde hair would be pulled into the usual ponytail, one of Rose's caps pulled over it to protect from the drizzle of rain that would otherwise catch on her long eyelashes. She would wear the old, black vans that were permanently thrown in the back of her Jeep, the shoes not sturdy enough for the competitive feet they covered as her toes would dig into the mud, readying her stance for batting, even in the knowledge she would never be able to win. Because of course Violet would play the game if she had to. There was nothing half-arsed about the girl at all.
Emmett would love her for that reason. Rose could imagine the whole scene, Edward long-range fielding, Violet on bat, Emmett readying to carry her around the pitch faster than his brother could retrieve the ball. They would reach the wicket in time, eyes bright and the cold air sweet with laughter, and Violet would turn to look at her with such a loud expression, and expression...
...not like the one she was looking at her with now.
There was a red-hazed glare painting her face when Violet opened the back door of the garage to see Rosalie. A hand was all that stopped the human from shutting it with a slam in her face.
"What do you want, Rosalie?" Violet barked, arms folded over her chest when she finally resolved that she was not leaving. "I thought we agreed on the fact that you were ignoring me?"
"I'm not ignoring you," Rosalie said, eyes not moving from the other girl's face, watching for any twitch that said no forgiveness was coming her way. "I wouldn't be here if I was."
"This is a pretty poor apology if that's what you're doing."
"Apology-" Rosalie couldn't help the graceless snort that left her nose. "If you want me to apologise for being distracted for a day then fine, I apologise. I'm sorry for ignoring you for a day."
It was Violet's turn to watch her, dark eyes fluttering across her face, only for a moment daring to go lower to swipe across her folded arms. The air was damp around her but Rosalie didn't budge.
"I'm sorry too," she finally said, surprising her slightly.
"What do you have to be sorry for?"
"With you standing here I think I might've blown it all a little out of proportion," Violet said, voice soft and laced with something else- something that Rose didn't understand. "It felt like that was it. That you were going to give me the cold shoulder forever."
She could hear the girl's heart louder than she usually could. It was faster, as if she was too scared to breathe.
"Why do you care so much?"
"I don't know," Violet breathed, laughing lightly in disbelief, almost as confused with herself as Rosalie was. But then she stopped still, shrugging her shoulders with a assigned shake of her head. "Maybe because I like your company, Rosalie Hale."
Rosalie was silent, unmoving. It was not an intimate thing to say, to like one's company. It was nothing like the words she would hear mumbled by Edward or Alice or Carlisle. But it was enough for Rosalie. It was enough to the girl who was so used to being used and shrugged off.
"Are you coming in or are you going to wait out there for the rain."
"I like the rain," Rosalie said. She wanted to close her eyes and rip her head back into the cool air and melt into it. How simple her words became when she was around the human. How stupid she sounded.
But Violet didn't care. She smiled. "So do I. Doesn't mean I live in it."
Her hand slowly found Rosalie's wrist and fingers clasped around it, tugging her forward lightly. If she noticed the cold, the hardness of her skin, she didn't mention it.
"Come in."
And Rosalie did. She felt the warmth of flesh against her arm, the pulse of veins in fingers that pressed against her hand, and put one foot in front of the other until she was following Violet inside, wondering since when she'd had to put so much thought into walking, and thought perhaps she understood Edward a little more then. She would do anything to feel like this a second time. To feel so alive again.
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I've revamped the contents and made some mood boards (are they called that?) thag I really like as well as linked the Spotify there as well as below: