What In the world
"yongsooo no"
"Oh come on don't be a spoil sport I did one of your dares now you do mine "
Yongsoo, my cousin 23 , YouTuber with a decent fan following ,and in college for a sport science degree , said from my couch his glasses askew , cheeks pressings against the shoulders of his boyfriend , Wookjin
Also 23 , with brilliant flair for direction , owns a vlog channel and also works with a team to produce short movies on YouTube, current working as a pd in a entertainment company
"Yeah hyung, come on do it," Wookjin supplied too, giving his signature maniac giggles
"Yongsoo jumped from a bungee jumping spot backwards for your dare now it's your turn"
*Sigh*
"I am not sacrificing my self respect and doing an abb reveal wearing a boar mask no Yongsoo"
"Look who's talking about self respect….the same guy who did dog roleplay on live~ "
Came jisungs singsong voice , a easily recognized actor and model , as he walked out of the shower in nothing but boxers his body dripping wet
As Yongsoo and Wookjin eat him up just from their eyes , much to the oblivion of Jisung
God knows what goes on between them
"The Audience knew it was a joke……Also wear something please…arnt you an actor with an ongoing drama? Why are you here ?"
Jisung flipped a "f u" and plopped himself on the couch next to Yongsoo , there was distance between them , but it was ignorable .
"*Sigh*really guys…can't you think of anything else yongsoo..?"
Yongsoo brought a tiny Finger to his lips forming a 'O' with his mouth, before giving too much of an innocent smile for it to lead to anything good
"Why not~ let me design anyone of your gyms "
"Naked boar mask it is! "
The three devils ( on my couch fyi) started crackling like maniacs …..though Yongsoo's one sounded offended
"Yah!!! As your cousin, should you not be nice to me like? Like ?like? Like no listen to me !"
No one was , too busy in laughing
"You have 5 gyms?????? Let me redecorate 1?"
"Naked boar mask display!" I said spreading my arms
As Wookjin and Jisung hooted
"I hate you all"
—-
Junji's pov
I stared at Sungho hyung , a gamer and podcast artist on youtube and Spotify, in utter confusion
"What hyung?"
"Omegle video"
"Why"
That resulted into hyung rolling his eyes ,
"Cause it's super popular among the general YouTube audience "
Taeyeob , an beauty influencer and GG cover artist , supplied from behind as he sat on his bed painting his nails in clear color nail polish
"But hyung….. am a Art YouTuber…..why would I do a prank video?"
"Cause kitKat " Taeyeob began Turning his attention to me
"Cause ! " He said by holding up a single painted finger " it's a popular trend and it's gonna give you the exposure to widen your audience" ans Sungho hyung nodded his head
"But….I already have a following" I tilted my head to express my confusion as words were never my strong front
"just do it! It's never bad to gain more!"
"But hyung !!!!! I can barely talk to people I know in real life??? I know zero languages??? Why make me do this???"
"You knowing zero languages is the reason we want to see you do it"
"It's just for the amusement of you two right…."
"Yes" they say in unison
".......fine……"
—-----
It goes smoothly for Kyubin
as smoothly as matching with random people and appearing bare body , with a katana in his back and a boar mask
By now kyubin has demasked myself 5 times
And he won't lie
It's a bit enjoyable especially
When the girls on other side of the screen blush furious or hoot in excitement
And the guys either laugh or quite….("they sure are insecure" Yongsoo quips )
And it goes smoothly till ok script
Till the next person comes on the other side
With a black mask on his face
Kyubin can't really The dudes face , ans starts trying to take the heavy mask off
JunJi is quite surprised by what greeted him on the other side
A half naked dude……with a boar?¿ Mask
But as an painter JunJi will say , the dude has awesome psychic
Honestly JunJi would love to get a chance to sketch that body.
JunJi soon notices the dude opposite him trying to take off his mask
And as they both demaks themselves
Kyubin turns to run his hands down his hair , combing his hair
JunJi uses his fingers to tidy up his hair and bangs
And as they both with their own hair and stare at other I full on attitude
They take in the others appearance , sitting in admiration of each other
And soon JunJi eyes flicker down and up and he presses his lips in a thin line press
And seeing that
The laugh that was bubbling inside Kyubin burst out , as he wheezed violently and vanished from the frame
JunJi soon follows., Laughing in a melodies way (to kyubins ears atleast)
His face crunching up and his eyes vanishing into crescents and he laughs like a windshield wiper
And they continue laughing , and as the laughter dies down
kyubin feels a airy excitement and Junjis cheeks are sweetly flushed
"You? You are JunJi right? " Kyubin finally asks , taking the initiative to start a conversation
"Oh!" Junji's- as kyubin now recognizes , widens his eyes , huge like saucers
"You know me??????"
"Yep, you made that huge painting of a cat on the subway wall right ? For one video?"
"Waaaah you do know me!" JunJi says , his smile almost breaking his face , as he giggles in disbelieve , his hand clapping in tiny
"I know you too! Your name is kb right! You did the puppy roleplay! Right hyung!"
"Why the puppy roleplay????? " Kyubin cries in mock offence'' "I did it once!"
"Am sorry, am sorry! But hyung …..oh hyung your body is so good "
"Isn't it ". Kyubin proceeds to flex his biceps
As JunJi genuinely starts hyping him up
"Hyung looks like an anime character ! Waaaah am jealous " he tried to hide his body with his hands as he laughs and snorts
And honestly kyubin has never seen someone so cute
"Hyung's so awsome"
"I know, but you sure fill your hoodie quite well"
And as JunJi disappears from the frame out of total shyness
Kyubin loosely Wonders , as a self proclaimed Het, why us he suddenly flirting with a guy
But as soon as JunJi comes back to screen
Pulling his hoodie up to hide his lips as his eyes stay as the cutest crescent
Kyubin throws those thoughts out the window
—----------------------------
Glitterbae: the two main characters finally meet each other so the story can finally move on
lylins corner: can i have such a cute meet cute too ? god? Gid? GOD? gdgwuqudqbobeqfn
Dum’dppdle : them : damn we both hot
Us avg folks : cries
Gowdavada: i wanna see them together again they look so cute
—-----------------------------------------------------
The video had gone viral . it wasn't a surprise to Kb that the most replayed part of the video was his and junjis scene
Two unlikely youtubers just stumbling into each other , in Omegle of all things would garner the most attention
But what he didnt expect was the huge public demand of his fans , to see and Junji together
At first he had laugh at the reaction
But then at night he had been called multiple times by yongsoo with a “Yooooooooooooo just collab with him!! Everyone wants it and i want to see your straight ass to act gay agin”
And things around that line
He had mostly ignored it
Till Junji had emailed him
______________
Jun-ji: Hyung can we do a collab .
It will be fun
:D
And now you tell me how was kyubin supposed to Deny such a polite request
___
Junji really couldn't let go …………. He couldn't let go of what he saw
Sometime not always , junji would sit and think
And junji had gotten his fans asking for a actual painting on kyubin
They were not forceful , but still
The idea lit a spark
If he made a painting on kyubin
Maybe he will finally be at ease
—--------------------------------------------------
When he decided to do meet Junji
It seemed wrong to just not to do something fun for their first meeting to be bland hi
So he decided to wear the same boar mask too
Don't ask why he wanted to make their meeting special
He just had to okay
And Kyubin thinks
He did good
As the moment Junhyung entered the park they had agreed upon
Junji took one look at him while walking from the distance and started laughing
And something warm swealed in kbs chest as he saw junji
A laughing an endearing laugh as he tripped over his own foot while he tried to approach kyubin
“Yah yah yah ! look who came who is it? who are you sir ,? Sir? don't sit on the grass sir “ Kyubin bursted out his Saatori
And junji laid helpless in the grass giggling
No right now it was not the time to think about that
It was not
—-----------------------------------------------------------------------
“And thats why the strokes looked like that , he had cut off his thumb , can you believe it “
For his part of the collab
He decided to take Junji to a modern art exhibition , and started to use junjis knowledge in art to his benefit
Honestly kyubin loved art galleries , and he liked to linger in front of a single painting or peace for a while
Which thoroughly annoyed his usual partners
(aka being wookjin or jisung, yongsoo gets a fever on the name of a art gallery visit )
Not much to his surprise , but much to his pleasure , junji also liked to linger
And he would go on and on about the little details and history behind each piece
With much more enthusiasm than he had expected for the quite boy to display
Talking in hushed whisper, stopping once in a while to giggle
And Kyubin recorded his vlive with an ever present smile of adoration
It's hard for kyubin to understand why he had started to take to the boy so instantly ,why his heart stopped
The moment JunJis hand found his way to kyubins to pull him towards a sculpture
And it felt like something bloomed
—--------------------------------
The time he takes to Edit the video and upload it
He keeps in touch with Junhyung , waiting for the day junhyung can make up his mind for what he wants to do with his part of the Collab
Scratch that
They have been vigorously exchanging texts messages
Even if he vanishes in the middle of the conversation with no qualms
And coming back with a hehe ….
He can't get enough of him
_____________________
"Sup Junhyung say"
"Oh hyung " JunJi voice creakes through "where are you now can we meet? I think I have made up my mind "
I stop the treadmill and pick the phone up
"Oh you finally did"
"Uh huh"
"Uh…right , now am in my gym so come over"
"Okay hyung meet you there "
"Wait wait wait! JunJi…,do you know 'Which' one of my gyms am in?"
There is a beat of silence
"......no"
"Then JunJi how do you plan to find me "
"............"
"JunJi~"
"Your mean….why would tease me this way …hyung! You are mean "
And the genuine sweet distress in his voice makes me laugh again ….
How are u this JunJi how
—----
"Hyuung nooooooo please nooo" JunJi wheezes as I try to take off his baggy t shit from the back as we both wrestle in the empty gym
"Oh come on , I know what you are hiding might as well show".
"Fine fine. Let me do it!! "
With that JunJi separated himself from me
He put a bit of distance between himself
And with a dramatic pose. He dragged the shirt over his head
Throwing it in a distance in a dramatic flare as he stood there striking a superhero pose.
.
His abs that looked pretty much sculpted my Michaelangelo's own hands
And I hooted encouragements
Soon though his bravado faded
As junhyung soon crumbled in a got of giggles dramatic failing backwards towards the gym mirror
Banging on it , sounding like he was a dying seal.
Adorable
"Waah junhyung , you go ahead and praise my guns , have you seen yourself?"
"Hyung stop!"
—
Running a couple of bench presses and weights later
Both of us sit down on the floor
Panting
As droplets of sweat drip down junjis body
Not bad at lol
"So . junhyung"
"Yeah"
"What have you planned for me "
"Oh right hyung be my model"
_
"So am I the Mona Lisa to your Leonardo
Or am I the french girls to your Jack?"
The quip made JunJi look up from the canvas towards me
And then giving a small mischievous smile
Beckoned me inside
"Hyung could also be the dOra maar to my picassO "
"Oh really" a chuckle leaves me without my concern
"What will you do to me then"
“What….what would you want …. I will do exactly that”
And the light and airy mood changes , as heavy stone settles deep in my core
And as i meet his eyes
There is something completely different from the boy i know
His soft stare has hardened into sharp knives as if , am nothing more than a specimen to poke around
And like an idiot, i gave myself away
I did …… didnt i ?
As my shirt fell from my shoulder ,and bare chested , a walk towards the platform in the middle of the room of his studio
And stand striking a pose
Meeting his eyes , as he smiles as me
I feel
I feel bare
“Hyung ……do you trust me ?”
Do i ?
Can I?
And words have long failed me
And i give a short nod
And junhyung gets up from his position in front of the canvas and walks up to me
His palms flatten against my shoulders, fitting well , as he shifts my body around
Modelling it to position he wants me to be in
“Like this , hyung”
A single hand slides down to my waist , curling around the hips end
“Hips to right a bit hyung”
And i observe his face from close
His lashes that tickle close to his cheeks
The two identical mole on both of his cheeks
The mole on his nose
The dip of cupid bow
His fingers linger around my jaws
And then he moves behind me
Out of my views
But i still feel him
His chest behind my back as he pushes my things forward
His breath tingles my shoulders and ear
And then his hands wrap around my neck
Raising my head
And yes , even if can't feel him
I can sense him
“Junji” my voice is nothing more than a whisper , finally something tangible , from the tangles in my mind
“Do you have to do that hyung…….do you have to call me that”
The gushing of breath
The featherlight weight of his whispers
His …..his……
“Right now is it not just us?”
I turn to see his eyes , his words
And he stares at me
Looking into his eyes
I can see a ocean from a distant forgotten dream
Memories of standing in the sand untethered
A thunder rights out , the rain it bangs on the window
It has been raining
“What should i call you then here , and now”
“Junhyung should be fine”
He smiles
His face scrunching up
Like a single blue candle lit up in the darkness
And i lean in capturing him inside
Like catching a beatle in summer
The shape of his lips against mine
And with the next thunder
Junhyung steps back
His eyes still lit up the room
As he walked up to his seat
And sat down picking up a brush as he went straight in
And his eyes kept on taking small peaks from behind the canvas
The more it feels like i come apart
As if his tender honesty hadn't already teetered me
And i let him pick me apart like a fool
I let him
His warmth , his whispers throbbing in the back of my head , like something subliminal
But as junhyung finally once again looks up from his canvas
A streak of red oh his cheek bones
Blending into the sweet poison purple down the dip of his throat
He meets my eyes
And he smiled
Like a butterfly on a spring blossom
He shone
As i pointed out the streak of paint
He touched his cheeks
And laughed
Like a breezes that shakes your hair when u stand in storm
And so did I
I laughed
And he shone
And the world melted away into blotches of paint
Maybe now i know
Maybe i know
What this blank space in my mind is
Maybe i know
—------------------------------------------
That night junhyung didn't want me to see the painting
He had shoved me out , with a “i need to record your genuine reaction hyung”
The next day , i visited him in his apartment , and Junhyung with his blushed smile had lead me to a wall , where he had hung the painting with a white cloth over it
All the while his eyes were hidden behind the camera lenses
“Come on hyung , unveil it”
He had chuckled
I gave him a smirk in response and with that i took hold of the soft draping over the canvas
And took it off in a dramatic flair playing it up for the camera
And there i stood in front of the canvas , trying to comprehend the strokes of me
Where junhyung had painted me , burning
As Junhyung's lips caressed my ears . “ cause , hyung , you burn me”
—-----------------------------------------------------------------------
And with that days flows
Meetings with Junhyung becoming a constant
Occupying most of my day
And
And
Its terrifying how empty nights get
Is it just kyubin
Or are the city lights extra bright today ?
They shine out of love that somehow doesn't reach kyubin
And he feels lonely again
And like this kyubin knows
He won't be able to sleep
The rain hits the window softly dancing and teasing him ,
And out of pure spite at the world for rendering so cold
He picks up his phone and calls the one number that has been on his mind for awhile
Ring
Ring
Ring
“Hyung ?”
“Is everything okay ?”
“Hmmm were u awake”
“Yeah………..cant sleep…………hyung you too?”
“Hmm tell me junhyung has the night always been this bright”
“I suppose ………it has always been this way”
“Its too bright like this if it shines all night , like this i dont think i can fall asleep”
“Honestly hyung , it best to wait till morning”
“Hmm is it?”
“Uh huh, somehow the night…….it shines brighter as it grows deeper and slower……….it just drags on”
“So then what am supposed to do”
“Are you alone hyung ?”
“Yes”
“Then play with me , even if there is nothing fun to do, just stay with me”
“And play what?”
“21 questions ?”
An if it was a teenagers game , did kyubin mind
No
He did not
Cause really it didnt matter
Cause they had to connect
They need to connected
Talk about all their complicated story
Who cared about who threw the first question
For they both know
They are bound to fall asleep together anyway
“Hyung do you think the whole city is asleep everyone except us”
“I hope not but…….probably………..tomorrow is gonna be the same against” kyubin sighed
“Well then hyung we need to talk everyday”
“Why”
“Because the night makes us colder , we loose more strength
However we do it , we must hug each other , even if i cant see you next to me
I will allow hyung to tease me even more of he likes”
“I get full reign then”
“No”
“Worth a try”
—----------------------------
Kyubin won't lie that he was surprised to see junhyung , standing on the other side of the door, in his pajams , with a side pillow on his arms and a soft smile on his face
Like a cat that claws on your window till you let it in
And the moment kyubin stepped aside
Junhyung made a B-line to kyubins bedroom , curling into a ball on his bed
And kyubin could not help but laugh at the human sized feline , that laid on kyubins bed , making himself comfy
“You are like a cat , has anyone ever told you that ?” , kyubin teased the other as he liad down next to him
“Not you too hyung”
“See am not the only one “
And junhyung groaned out loud
“Hyung is a puppy” Junji threw back
“If am a dog and you are a cat i should bite you now right”
Junhung didnt answer , just hit kyubin in his arm
Too hard for kyubins liking
“I like puppies too , but i like cats more”
“Of course you like you own kind more”
“What does hyung like”
“Dogs”
“Toche hyung”
“Do you have a cat ? i saw it in your lives ……..but i didnt see one in your apartment that day”
“I do , GF, she just likes going around the neighbourhood on her own “
“Wait…… you named your cat….Gf???? Why”
Junhyung looked at kyubin , wide eyes of surprise before he frowned his eyebrows
“She just…..before i adopted her ,, she would always come running to me in the streets and for for me at my door step so…………………”
And kyubin laughed out loud
One his genuine laugh , not the one of performance , thats deep hand literally goes ’hahahaha”
But a high pitched one that shocked even junji , torn from the bottom of his throat as he arched up
“ you seriously are quite a mystery……….. So if that cat sneaked into your apartment was named GF , can I call this huge cat that sneaked into my apartment BF”
Kyubin jokingly flirts back , pretty much expecting a paw to be launched at his face
What he didnt expect was, Junji smiling , wrapping his arms around kyubins torso amd snuggling his face into kyubins chest , whispering a drowsy “sure” into the black tshirt of kyubin
Falling asleep
And kyubin promptly accepted his fate
—------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Both of their video was posted
They both got a lot of new subscribers and it was on trending for a week both getting over 5M views
They decided to celebrate this
thats what they had planned
That was idea
And he had popped a bottle of champagne with junhyung , but
He had gotten a call
From Wookjin
He had expected to hear the boy laughing and teasing kyubin on the other side
But what he didnt expect was
To hear the boy crying frantically , on the other side
“Hyung mill he “
—--
Kyubin had barged into the hospital with junji on his toes
And tore down the place
To finally reach a single bed
Surrounded by a police officer
A nurse
A fuming Jisung and a nine who resembled a statue
And sitting on that bed
Was
His cousin
His practically baby cousin
Who stared at him with his eyes full of tears
And right next to his teary eyes , was a ugly bruise
A ugly purple bruise that bloomed , dipping into his cheeks down to his neck
Bruises all over his face
Bruises that looked ….. So misplaced on his brothers face
“Hyung” Yongsoos voice fumbled
The lips through which those words were uttered
Were busted and bloody
What had they done to his Yongsoo ?
“He was assaulted by two men …while he was in itaewon”
“Why… “. kyubinds throat had dried up
“Why “
“Isn't it obvious hyung” . Nine spoke up , finally turning to acknowledge Kyubin
And only did he notice , that a huge bandage covered the left side of nines head and a blue-green bruise was printed on his left cheeks .
“Cause we are gay , we are publically gay ……we are filthy and we deserve it…”
And with that nine turned back to stare blankly at the wall
And yongsoo hid his face , behind his hair in shame
“And where are the assaulters?? Where are they? Are You not gonna do anything about them “
Junnji spoke up , accusing the police officer
He had never heard , Junhyung voice be so harsh
“We have identified the assailant and they are gonna get their due punishment”
“Due punishment ……….what bullshit” jisung darkly chuckled , his hands squeezing a glass so hard , it had started to form cracks
“You are gonna bring them in , question them a bit for formality make them pay a measly fine and let them go ? is that due punishment “
The glass had finally broken , the sharp pieces embedding themselves on jisungs palms , as he walked out of the room with a bloodied had
And kyubin could distinctly hear Yongsoo whimper.
—---------------------------------------------------------------------
Leaving the hospital after boarding Jisung , yongsoo and Wookjin in a cab
Walking home kyubin felt lightheaded , like he was drowning
The supposedly Shin of korean youtube platform
Look at him , he could not even protect his own brother
His own freaking brother and his boyfriend
Those two same idiots , who spend evenings after evenings on his couch
Two people so close to him
He could do nothing
Nothing
“I cant believe ….this happened to begin with”.junji mumbled next to him , “of all the place Itaewon”
Kyubin looked to his side to the boy walking next to him
Junhyung walking side by side him
His eyes heavy with thought
Eyebrows frowned , lips pressed into a thin smile
And kyubin realised
When times comes
When both of them give into each others curious little imulpes
A time would come , that , that Junhyung
Would also be hurt
And he
Exactly how pathetic he was
Would not be able to do anything
And kyubin stops walking
And stares at junhyungs back , who is yet to notice him halting
He wont be able to do anything for junhyung , even when he would be the reason for junhyung's pain
“Kyubin hyung??”. Junhyung turned back in alarm and worry
Would a bruise like that also taint Junhyung's features?
“Whats wrong hyung ?”
“Junhyung………lets stop being in contact”
“what?”.Junhyung's eye widened . “what do you mean ?”
“Am sorry junhyung ….”
Kyubin takes a step back
“No , you cant do that possibly can you”
“I cant ……i am sorry, its pointless,”
“Its not hyung listen to yourself”
“Listen to me Junhyung”, junhyung was panting in pure fear
“You saw , what happened to Yongsoo , Yongsoo!! I could not do anything , thats how this world is junhyung , the moment everyone figures out ….. The same thing will happen to you Junhyung , how much , how much can a person be alert , the moment you let your guard down, this is whats bound to happen , cause once we became the public figure we are ……..they have more right on us .”
Junhyungs eyes were teary as he fisted his own hair in frustration , he cries
Holding onto my hand with all his might
"Please, don’t leave hyung" tears falling from his eyes makes him even more
"Too much is crumbling
Please don’t break us , please don't
You’ll break with it too hyung
Please don’t, don’t leave
Don’t throw our everything away, please don’t do this hyung "
“Junhyung no ..please don't make it harder than it has to be ……cause I know I will burn Junhyung…and…if i am to burn, i would rather do it on my own that drag you down with me”
Kyubin himself was closer to tear he has ever been , face crunched in pure agony
Junhyung just looked at kyubin , eyes begging ' don’t be like this '
Kyubin heart tore into little pieces yet started walking away
Determined to spare Junhyung from this pain
Throwing his parting words at junhyung over his shoulder
Not being able to face him again
“Just remember , that the time I have spent with you, to me, seemed too good, almost my fiction. Thank you for that”
—-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Junhyung was right
Breaking them would break kyubin too
Kyubin honestly had no idea what being 'broken' meant
How can someone be broken
Now though he knows
He knows
Being broken mean being hollow
Like there is a hole in chest
That wants to suck in everything , kyubin now , always feels nauseous
Like he wants to vomit everytime he moves
Even though he hasn't been eating at all
He knows that broken means , that every thought about Junhyung Pierce his skin like walking on a path of shattered glass..
And maybe the pain would stop
Maybe it would stop if he forgot about him
But how could kyubin forget about Junhyung
There's no reason, kyubin just misses junhyung
Countless times a day, the only thing kyubin can think about is about holding Junhyung
All day long, kyubin just want to be with him
Like a fool, he can't just can't stop thinking of him
How can he ever
Go back to before he knew him
How was he supposed forget Junhyung
Forget The shape of Junhyung next to him
forget The way junhyung fell asleep
The echo you leave behind
Kyubin wanted to know all the weird made up words Junhyung uses
He wants to see junhyung's smile everyday
He wants to live in Junhyung's heart
He wants to see junhyungs worst
He want to have you junhyung by his side eternally
How can he
Go back to before he knew him
He can't
He knows that he can't
So he does the only thing he can think of
He turns to alcohol
Normally tho
Kb is not the type to get drunk
Drinking alcohol only to blend in parties and not stand out
Though that doesn't mean he doesn't enjoy a drink or two by himself
Though getting drunk is really out of character for KB
But he really can't think of anything else other than the burning liquid that could numb the his ache
So that's how kb ends up , a week later
Staggering the darken dirty alleyway somewhere in Seoul
Hands on the walls to support his weight
People pass him bye
In Empty street with the lamppost fire
Kb burns under them ,
Wasn't he supposed to be numb
But no
Instead he chokes
He can't breathe
And he cries
Alone in the streets , his back against the dirt Stained wall
Is this his stage
Is this story
Kb slides down
drooping his head
Blending in with the Staggering shadow of Seoul
So
This is his stage
And now he has becoming nothing more than an uninvited guest that Nobody knows
And tears rack out of his body shaking him up in rough stabs
And as kb pathetically sits there
Kb knows what broken means
And he feels something poking his leg
A kitten
Rubbing his head on his leg
Meowing
As if trying to console him
Under the lamppost fire
Under the full moon
Kbs shaking weak hands picks it up
And brings the kittens little face to his forehead
"You kittens" his voice cracks
"You don't know the meaning behind no do you, you need to get what you want don't you"
The kitten meows back at him, laughing he sits the kitty down on his lap
Patting her head
"You know…..am doing this for him …….but then why does this feel so wrong "
An other little mew rings out
"Is what am doing even right "
The kitty nudges his head harder against kbs rough hands
"If am ……destined to burn…..is it my destiny to burn alone….."
________________
A bucket of water lands right on KB face successfully jerking him awake
"Oh shit what the fuck??"
He sits up faster than light on his own couch , and soon comes in the huge hammer of hangover
And above him he sees
A laughing Yongsoo
A bright laughing Yongsoo
"Yongsoo?"
"Sup hot guy, last night you were so drunk u fell asleep on the road side, thank God u had me on emergency contact or otherwise you would wake up in the police station you dumbass "
"What?" He asks , swiping away the hair from his face , as Yongsoo hands him some meds and a tall glass of water that he chugs
"Uh huh, You even had a kitten on you ,now eat this soup, Jisung made it , and dropped it on his way"
Angels , they are angels
And finally after he inhales half of the soup does his vision stop being blurry
And he can finally see that
Yongsoo's hair has been chopper short , almost a buzz cut , with short stubby bangs gracing his forehead
And kyubin almost jumps in alarm "Susu your hair?? Did they!"
"No no no no !!!! No no one did anything!"
And Kyubin sits back down in relief
"I did this cause …..I thought I was due a change haha " he says playing with his ear lobe
"How…..how are you ….both "
"We are fine ….. Jisung is still a grumbling old man but he is coming around , Wookjin is going to work and he is still a bit out of it but as days pass he is coming back to himself more and more ….and am going to college today and after that to a cafe to shoot a behind of how they make those dalgona muffins or something"
"Yongsoo……do you have to-"
"Yes" Yongsoo says with complete comvinction
"If I don't , if I hide , then they will, they will show that they have control over us …over me , and they don't, they don't have any control or right on me , I will do what I want , kiss who ever I want and they can't do shit about it , I will not bow my head "
And Kyubin looked at Yongsoo
Yongsoo who's short hair makes his cheeks bone and eyes sharper
Yongsoo wo wears his fading brusies like some sort of tattoo
Yongsoo who sits there with crossed legs and head held high with a self assured smile
…Yongsoo has grown up now
Kb keeps his bowl aside and jumps on him
Hugging him tightly
" I am so proud of you"
Ans Yongsoo giggles "yep yep sure big guy …"
He separates from Yongsoo and sees his beaming smile at him
No his baby can't definitely be cooler than him
And Kyubin finally picks up his phone opening a chat room he has ignored with great effort
And finally hits that up
'Hey where are you?'
_______
The moment he steps back into the fimilar studio
He sees junhyung sitting in front of a huge canvas that's laid on the ground
Cans of black paint around him as he measures something
Taking in the figure of the boy who is lost in his own world
And Kyubin realises what he feels
As junhyung turns around , for his deep sea like eyes to widen and tear up with little shining stars in them , as his smile stretches into a lovely little smile of delight and longing
kyubin realizes …. He loves him
He is in love with a human sized cat
And before junhyung could say something
Kyubin closes the distance between them
Kneels right in front of Junhyung
Not caring that he spilled the cans of black paint
Not caring that the black paint is his hand , dripping like vice
As his hands cage junhyung face
Not caring that he is tainting junhyung in this black paint
As he kisses him , in a slow hungry rhythm ,
Like he is a thirsty traveller who has finally found a cool drinking spot in the scorching desert
And he doesn't care that when junhyung kisses him back with the same amount of desperation that Junhyung's hand are tainted with the same black paint
That when junhyung's hand travel to his face , neck back he is also being tainted
And they meet and part
Meet and part
Tainting each other more and more
He parts to take his junhyung's face
Darken with desire
Darked by the back paint all over his face in smudges
Ruined cause of kbs own hands
Like a freshly painted oil painting that he decided to touch and feel
"I am burning junhyung….I am burning
I don't want to burn alone "
"Then don't " junhyung whispers
And Kyubin groans kissing him again before junhyung pushes him back panting
The don't …. just leave everything behind burn with me ,Let's turn to ash right now "
And Kyubin gives in to the fire
And Kyubin burns