I stared longingly into the glass bottle, I felt quite drowsy but not drowsy enough. I wanted to black out, forget what I had done.
Suddenly, I heard a knock on the door. I had run away for a reason. I never had visitors, except the landlord when my rent was due. But it was ten pm, it couldn't be him.
When the knocks became even more persistent, I staggered towards the door in annoyance. I wanted to be left alone. I deserved to be alone.
When I opened the door, I lost my balance and fell into the visitor's arms. I looked into the worried eyes of Lisa, my sister.
"Tunde! I've been looking for you for weeks, what happened? Where have you been? I..."
I burst into tears silencing her and replacing her slight anger with pity. She helped me to the couch and placed my head on her lap.
I loved Lisa, I was in her debt. But I could never tell her what had made me run away.
***
I knocked on Amaka's door, hoping to surprise her. It was her birthday and though she had insisted on staying alone at home I still wanted to spend the day with her. Being a police officer in Lagos meant that I didn't get a lot of days off.
She didn't answer so I used a spare key. I stepped into the living room and everywhere seemed silent at first. But then I heard something.
Climbing up the stairs that led to her room, the sounds got louder. I already knew what was happening, but I needed to confirm that Amaka had really tossed away my trust.
I got to the door to her room and leaned on it. I could hear guttural moans from the other side.
"Faster William, faster!"
I kicked down the door, breathing heavily. Amaka was naked and of course she wasn't alone. My best friend Tayo was right beside her.
"I-I can explain" Amaka stuttered covering herself with the sheets.
I didn't know what to say, but I knew how I felt. I had trusted her with my heart, and she was throwing it away. The bastard, Tayo who had taken everything from me, my promotion, opportunities even my ex was lying right there beside her.
"How many things do you want to take from me?!" I yelled.
"Please bro" he said sitting up "I'm so.."
"Who are you calling bro!" I yelled. Before I knew what was happening, my hand was in my pocket, and I was pulling out my gun.
"Sleeping with Binta wasn't enough for you abi?"
I continued.
"No guy" He begged. I could see the beads of sweat begin to appear on his face as he realized the gravity of what he had done. "please, abeg, no I'm sorry..."
"We both know you don't mean that." I said before pulling the trigger.
I shot him, twice in the chest. I didn't even realize I had done it till I heard Amaka's screams and saw her clutching his bloody body.
I was a monster. I had killed a man. So, I did the only thing that came to my mind.
I ran.