Ages
Dick-14
Jason-13
Tim-11
Damian-8
⚠️T/W⚠️
Mentions of sh,sh scars,blade
Third person POV:
Dick was walking around his room with a short sleeve top on,his cuts and scars visible,red,angry ones and small white ones littered his forearm and bicep.He sat on his bed and put his arm in front of him,using his right hand to gently hover over,looking at certain ones in particular and rubbing them,remembering vividly why he had gone so deep with the blade.
Looking at the time and date he realised that today was his last half term at Gotham School and then he'd get a good amount of time off until college.In his excitement he ran downstairs,to the kitchen without his blazer or jumper on.
"Bruce,Alfred!I've got 2 weeks off!"Dick exclaimed,excitement coursing through his veins.
However instead of a happy response,he was greeted with a concerned and wide-eyed Alfred and a cold glare from Bruce albeit it softened.He was confused but snapped out of it when Tim walked in with a coffee mug in hand but he dropped it when he looked at Dick.
"Richard.What have you done to your arm?"Bruce's voice asked.
Dick felt himself pale,he looked down and realised that he'd gone down without putting any long sleeves on.His heart thudded in his chest and he felt his chest tighten.He looked at Bruce and Alfred,saying nothing but he could feel the tension in the room,he turned to look at Tim who's face was scrunched up in concentration and thinking.
He turned to look at Alfred and Bruce once more,Bruce had stood up from his chair and had walked over to Dick.He held Dick's wrist and gently pulled his arm out,moving it to get a better look at it.Dicks mouth felt like a dessert and his heart pounded faster,trying to think of a reasonable excuse.
"What have you done to your arm?"Bruce repeated firmly.
Dick's mind went blank, "I don't know."Is all he said but Bruce wasn't having it.He repeated his question again and Dick answered the same.Bruce got the gist and Tim asked the question.
"What did you do it with?"Tim asked,eyes cold.
"Tim,please-I..." Dick tried to cover for himself but failed miserably.
"He asked you a question Dick.What did you do it with?"Jason asked as he entered the room.He'd been stood outside the door,listening in.
"Jay-Please."Dick pleaded.
"What was it Dick?"Bruce asked once again but sounding disappointed.
"It was blade!Okay?!You happy now?!"Dick relented and snapped,surprised he hadn't started crying.
"Where?"Bruce asked.
"What do you mean where?"Dick asked genuinely confused,panic rising in his chest even more as he scolded himself for being so stupid.
"I mean where did you do it and is your arm the only place."Bruce answered back,Tim had gotten closer to Dick but didn't want to push any boundaries.
"I-I did it in my room and,"Dick replied slowly,feeling bad for having to lie about the next part, "and it's only my arm."He finished,head down and bangs covering his eyes.
"Why did you do it?"Jason asked,joining in once again,putting his hand on his elder brothers shoulder.
"I-I don't know."He muttered,knowing exactly why he did it but thinking that saying it aloud would sound stupid.
Dick folded his arms as guilt and sorrow built up in his chest,building up until he just wanted to get away from everybody in the household.Jason's hand fell from his shoulder and everyone sat in silence for a good minute before an outraged cry was heard.
"What do you mean you don't know?You must have a reason!"Jason practically roared in Dicks ear.
"Fine!It sounds stupid but it helps me calm down,Jason.When I'm upset,angry,frustrated or whatever,cutting helps me because I can focus on the cut,it helps me focus on one thing at a time and when I'm finished the thing I was feeling beforehand is gone!DOES THAT HELP?!"Dick replied,getting it out in a rush,hoping that they wouldn't yell at him for his reasoning.
However,everyone sat or stood there stunned,Alfred was looking at Dick sorrowfully,Bruce had his head in his hands,Tim looked worried and Jason looked flabbergasted.Dick took this as his time to speak up and sort himself out.
"W-well,I'm going to be late for school,so I need to go,bye."He said loud enough for them all to hear.
Tim and Alfred wished him a good day and bid him farewell.As Dick trudged upstairs to get his school stuff,he silently berated himself for not realising he didn't have long sleeves on.Walking into his room he grabbed his bag,placing it on his bed.
He walked quickly over to his sock draw,opening it and rummaging through it,finding his box of plasters and bandages.He walked back to his bag and stuffed them in,walking over to his desk,he opened the second draw and pulled out a pencil case.Opening it,he looked through it making sure everything was there:
Vaseline
Even more plasters
Hand cream
Tissues
They were all there so he then pulled out the small white tub,one that you can get toys in from a toy machine,and opened it.Making sure everything was in the tub too:
A small roll of bandages
A blade
A sharpener
Everything was in there too.He shoved that in his bag as well and zipped it shut,he got to the front door and told everyone he was walking to school and left.He cried the entire way to school but once there he went straight to his locker,put the combination in and practically threw the pencil case and plaster box in.Afterwards he closed his locker and locked it,walking to Tutor and fearing Bruce had phoned the school.If he had then he might've told them,a teacher would come and take him,talk to him and whatnot.
All throughout the day,every time he saw a teacher pass by through the windows,his heart would skip multiple beats and thud faster.Barbara having already left but knowing about his self harm,didn't help because now he had no one to talk to and he hadn't any other friends.
His last day of school did not go as planned but he didn't want to go home either.
A few days went by and the incident wasn't talked about but when Sunday night came round and Dick had finished his shower,put a towel on ,he walked into his bedroom and pulled on some underwear and re-wrapped the towel.Just as he was about to pull his pyjamas out of his draw,Bruce walked in and Dick froze,the pair had only shared few tense conversations acting as if everything was normal.
"Dick,show me your legs."Bruce commanded,his face set like stone.
Dick felt his face burn like a child caught in an extremely bad lie,and he felt his voice catch in his throat,immediately giving himself away with what he said next and how he said it.
"W-what?"he choked out and Bruce repeated himself but the duo already knew that Bruce knew.
Dick knowing there was no way out of it,unwrapped his towel from his waist and showed Bruce his thighs.Bruce dropped his Batman façade and tears pooled in his eyes.
The pair stood in Dicks room,as Bruce listed hypotheticals off with what could've happened if Dick accidentally slit the wrong vein or artery and bled out before calling for help,how he would cut too much or too deep and lose too much blood.Dick stood there and intervened very rarely and whenever he felt fresh tears,he'd looked to the ground or away from Bruce and squeeze his eyes shut,taking a deep breath and calmed down.When Bruce was finished,he told Dick to get dressed and go downstairs and stay there until Bruce told him to go back up.
Dick waited for Bruce to leave and got changed,sat on his bed,hands resting on his knees and looking at the floor as he cried and let it all out.He quickly grabbed all the things he could remember that had a blade in,took the blades out and opened his window,throwing them out into the tall grass,where Bruce wouldn't find it,where the others wouldn't find it,where the wind and rain would take it away and where Dick,himself,wouldn't find it.He wiped his face and walked downstairs,finding Bruce,Alfred and Jason sat in the kitchen.Jason looked genuinely concerned and Bruce was staring at the wall,Alfred was the only one who paid attention to him walking in.
Alfred greeted him solemnly and Jason and Bruce got up and while Bruce left the room without a reply,Jason hung back,looked Dick in the eye,placed his hand on Dick shoulder giving it a squeeze and left the room,following Bruce's footsteps.
Dick cried again and watched them walk into the direction of his room through his tears,he looked at Alfred who shook his head in a way of saying not to ask or follow them.After 20 minutes went by he heard banging and he cried even more.His face stung from crying for so long and the fresh load of tears in his hysterical state didn't help.
Bruce and Jason came down,holding loads of Dicks stuff.Stuff they thought he would hurt himself with.Bruce phoned the school,so as to alert them for his last half term at school.Dick got all of his stuff back just over a month later and they'd all completely ignored it aside from when they gave him his stuff back.
~The end~
I hope you enjoyed and if you are going through anything like this please find help.
You can go on Google/safari or what ever you use and type in
Kooth
Or
Shout
And these are both anonymous helplines for if you're struggling with anything.
Stay safe!