irl !
"Fuck you, Ranboo Live," said Y/n.
A loud gasp was to be heard from Ranboo.
"How dare you?" He put his hand over his chest in a somewhat dramatic manner and looked shocked.
Another loud gasp, but this time it came from Tubbo.
"Yeah, how dare you insult him? Poor thing can't even defend himself!" He berated.
"Yes I can," Ranboo's eyebrows drew together as he frowned down at Tubbo before returning his gaze to Y/n. "You're just a miniature human who speaks some gremlin language that nobody understands."
Now it was Y/n's turn to gasp.
"How dare you?" He demanded.
"That- that's what you get for disrespecting me!" Ranboo said loudly and crossed his arms triumphantly.
"And... scene!" Billzo's grin dripped with sarcasm as he waved his camera. "That was amazing."
"Hey! When did you start recording?" Tubbo demanded which Ranboo and Y/n fall into a fit of laughter.
"You didn't know?" Ranboo asked and readjusted his mask.
"No! Did you?" asked Tubbo.
"Yeah man, he started recording before Y/n insulted me," Ranboo answered.
"It's true, the real question is, how didn't you know? He's been standing there this entire time," Y/n chuckled and wiped imaginary tears from his face.
"Stop being so mean to me guys," Tubbo said. "How was I supposed to know?"
"Uhh... I'm right here mate. I haven't exactly been hiding," said Billzo.
"Oh, shove off," Tubbo groaned in annoyance and the others laughed. He went to the couch and sat down with his phone, eyes glued to the screen. A lost cause, really.
"So what do you guys wanna do?" asked Ranboo. The question was directed toward Y/n and Billzo.
"Die."
"Eat children."
Y/n and Billzo stared at each other. Then they fell into a fit of laughter.
"Eat children? Really?" Ranboo asked with a laugh and his voice went really high when he said 'really'.
"Yes, they are full of nutrients and vitamins and stuff," Billzo grinned.
"You're scary man," said Ranboo.
"I think it's a great idea, let's start with Tommy," Y/n suggested.
"Ew, no. I bet he tastes gross. Like mud," Billzo stuck his tongue out in disgust and grimaced.
"Mud? Where?" Tommy asked as he entered the common room through the kitchen. It was nothing but coincidental but it was funny how he appeared just as they started talking about his supposed favourite food. It was such a weird bit he had going on.
The three of them laughed as Tommy stood there with a confused expression.
"What?" He asked and tried on an unsure smile. "What are you laughing at? Is there something on me?" Tommy proceeded to look down at himself to look for the stain or wherever he thought was on him while the others just laughed.
twitter !
Eryn @ErynStreams • 7m
eros is so dumb
↳ Eros @Eros_ • 6m
am not.
↳ Eryn @ErynStreams • 5m
you are
↳ Eros @Eros_ • 5m
i thought you loved me
↳ user @userone • 4m
does this count as love drama?
↳ Eros @Eros_ • 3m
yes
↳ Eryn @ErynStreams • 3m
maybe
↳ Eros @Eros_ • 2m
wdym maybe?? we're literally
married you buffoon
↳ Eryn @ErynStreams • 1m
HEY! mind your manners, i'm no
buffoon, you idiot
↳ user @usertwo • 36s
they even bicker with one another
like an old married couple
↳ user @userthree • 12s
ikr???
↳ user @userfour • 7m
i... don't even know what to say to
this. context???
↳ Eryn @ErynStreams • 5m
the context is his entire existence.
it annoys me. it's like an insult
towards my very being. i hate him
↳ user @userfour • 5m
what? :D
↳ user @userfive • 4m
i am positively crying rn
↳ user @usersix • 4m
i am not positively anything. i'm
confused
↳ TommyInnit @tommyinnit • 3m
Agreed. He's an idiot
↳ Eryn @ErynStreams • 2m
hey! don't speak of my husband
that way!
↳ TommyInnit @tommyinnit • 1m
what the fuck man
irl !
"Hey, you don't actually have to do this," Ranboo reminded Y/n for what must have been the one-thousandth time. Ranboo was protectively leaning over Y/n's left shoulder, his hand comfortably rested on the other one, watching everything that happened on the screen before them. He did a bad job at hiding all the glances he stole of Y/n's increasingly anxious-looking face.
"Yeah, don't feel pressured to do this just because you planned to do it, you don't always have to go through with the initial plan," Eryn offered.
Y/n sighed and said, "Thanks guys, but I want to, I really do. And I appreciate you being here with me," He offered them a warm and genuine smile, which they couldn't help but return, although much less sure versions, but not without sincerity. They were, after all, happy for their friend and the fact that he was brave enough to do this.
"Of course," Ranboo smiled. He had, and this was a rare moment to behold, his mask off for the stream. He had risen to the occasion and decided to show his support through action.
A beat of silence followed this, as Y/n recollected his thoughts, stared at the screen before him and tried to ignore the thoughts swimming in his head. They were all saying the same thing but in different ways. That he should not be doing this. That it was a dumb idea. That he would lose followers if he did. That he could never show his face ever again. Yet it was what he most wanted to do, but he was scared. More scared than he had ever been before. But conquering his fear would show that he was greater than the fear itself and that he could, and would, act out of his own will. Y/n drew a deep breath.
"Are we ready then?" He asked and took his time to look both of his friends in the eyes. The others had been mindful enough to not be there. He felt bad for telling them no, but he would have been a lot more on edge with everyone there watching him, making a big spectacle out of things. After all, it was only his face, a button on the screen and then the growing number indicating the number of people watching him, his face, and his face only. Except Ranboo was there too, creating some sort of distraction since it was not often he showed his face. Correction, never showed his face.
It would take the attention off of Y/n, but only some of it. Just marginally. He knew that most of his viewers would still be watching him, freaking out over the fact that he had given no warning as to what he was doing. He'd considered actually announcing what he was going to do, but figured it would only increase the number of people watching it live, which he did not, under any circumstance, want.
Y/n took a deep breath and banished all bad thoughts from his mind, intending on keeping them out until the stream was over at the very least. He pressed the 'go live' button and waited as his starting soon screen played and his viewers rolled in. As the number rose, so did his nausea. He actually had thought he might throw up for a minute.
His breathing got unsteady and shallow, but Y/n forced himself to take deep breaths, which was backed up by Ranboo rubbing his hand over Y/n's shoulder and shoulder blades. That somewhat eased the pressure and made it easier to breathe.
"You don't have to do it, they don't know yet. You can still put the mask on," Eryn offered, giving Y/n one last way out, but he didn't want a way out, he wanted to conquer his fear.
He shook his head. "No, I have to do this," Y/n said and was referring to the fact that he did not have to do it for his fans, but for himself. Maybe this could be the first step towards being able to look in the mirror without knowing who is looking back at him. His features seemed to constantly change and his appearance was never the same. Or maybe it was, but he had no idea what it looked like. Y/n's self-image was distorted and as far from reality as can get.
Eryn nodded. "All right then," He said.
"You can do this, we'll do it together," Ranboo offered words of comfort, continuously moving his hand, squeezing Y/n's shoulder. And although Y/n was too caught up in his own fear to notice the small tremor in Ranboo's voice, Eryn was not. He threw Ranboo a concerned glance but decided to take it up later rather than stressing Y/n out even more.
Y/n didn't answer, he only nodded and took a deep breath. He could do this. He slowly lowered the volume of the music and turned on the microphone.
"Hey guys, what's up? How are we doing? How are we chat?" Y/n began his usual non-sense talking, pretending everything was as usual. "I'm great, we have Ranboo and Eryn here with us!" He continued. "Say hello to chat."
"Hi chat," said Ranboo.
"Hello Eros's chat," Eryn waved, a force of habit maybe, but it looked a bit silly since the camera wasn't on yet and he was waving to a screen.
"What we're doing? Oh, we were just gonna talk," Y/n chipped and tried to seem as up-beat as possible. "Here, the camera is off..." He added after a seconds thought and turned it on, switching out his starting soon screen for the camera view. Y/n was wearing his mask but just realised he forgot the glasses before he turned it on so he left in a hurry.
"Well, there he goes," Ranboo joked and laughed.
"Where did he- oh," said Eryn before he caught on. "Okay chat, who's more handsome; me or... me?" He grinned. "I would say I'm pretty handsome myself."
"Hm, I think you're very handsome," Ranboo said just as Y/n came back with his sunglasses on.
"Me too," He nodded in agreement.
"Aww, you guys," Eryn said and waved his hand dismissively. "You didn't have to- well, you did."
"Jerk," Y/n muttered, he was joking but he realised it was one of those times his jokes were so dry that nobody actually understood he was joking. Also because the jokes weren't even funny enough to actually laugh at. He sat back down in the chair.
"So, chat, how are we today?" Y/n asked from under his mask. He was nervously making small talk as the dim lighting in the room made his vision even worse behind his sunglasses. It seemed to be nighttime even though they were inside.
"They seem fine," Ranboo said as he read chat.
"Great, great," Y/n nodded.
A beat of silence.
"So... what do you guys think of Tubbo's house?" Ranboo asked awkwardly.
"I think it's pretty good. Cozy, kinda," Y/n shrugged and was surprised by how easily distracted he was. And perhaps a bit concerned. He'd have to look into that.
"I don't like it." Eryn said. Then he laughed when Y/n and Ranboo both turned their heads to laugh at him. "I'm kidding, guys. Geez," he rolled his eyes with a grin.
"Well guys, that's the stream. I guess we'll say bye now," Y/n said as it was time to wrap up. His pulse felt like his heart had just multiplied and the like the little copies had spread throughout his veins and were pulsating just below his skin.
"Oh. Yeah, we've been live for a while now," Ranboo nodded along, knowing what was about to come.
"Yep, see you chat. It was lovely hanging out with you," Eryn gave the camera a big, warm smile.
The blue-light from the computer was the sole object of Y/n's focus, he was staring intensely at it from behind his glasses. Then he sighed.
"Chat, I think it's well overdue..." he said and slowly took of the sunglasses, handing them over to Ranboo who was pretending to be shocked.
"Holy shit," he breathed. Y/n held up a hand.
"Hold on Ranboo," he said and stared into the camera for a heartbeat. "I'm not done." Y/n proceeded to quickly take of his mask and grin at the camera.
He felt the need to seem confident although his insides were on a rollercoaster at the moment and he felt as if he might throw up all of his organs. He took the liberty to glance at chat and saw the general shock and chaos that had been caused by his, oh so sudden, face reveal. Y/n had to admit though, there had been no warning, no buildup, just his face.
Eryn and Ranboo remained silent behind him. He was thankful that they did, them saying anything could just make this moment so much worse.
"Well, I think that's it chat, see you for the next stream, I'm going to raid... Foolish and leave now, enjoy," Y/n said after a moment of consideration, still feeling as if he might throw up. The urge to put the mask back on was so overwhelming that he had trouble keeping his hands still. "Bye guys," he added with a smile and a small wave. "Be nice to Foolish and don't go bombard his chat talking about me, that's very rude."
"Yeah, and bye," Ranboo waved with a confirmative nod. His hair moved in a way that Y/n had only thought was possible in animated movies, series, games, whatever. Not in real life.
"Bye chat," Eryn's lips curled into a small smile. He, in defiance, did not wave like Ranboo and Y/n had.
Then they were gone. The stream had ended and the only ones left was the offline chatters. Y/n closed the window before he could see what they were saying. He let out a shaky breath, laughing a bit afterwards.
"That was easy," he joked and hugged himself, as if he was hiding or protecting himself from something.
Ranboo placed a comforting hand on his left shoulder. "You did great."
"Yeah, you killed it. We're proud of you," Eryn agreed with a warm smile. His smiles always seemed so warm and genuine. Y/n was almost jealous of that smile of his, just almost. He sighed.
"Thank you guys," Y/n said and put a his right hand over Ranboo's. He looked at them both. "I mean it, I don't think I could've done it without you."
"It's nothing man. It's what friends do," Ranboo reassured him with a light squeeze on his shoulder. Eryn nodded.
"It was all you," he added.
"Thanks anyway," said Y/n. "Should we call the others and tell them they're allowed back in the house before they freeze to death?"
Ranboo drew a sharp breath.
"Yeah, we probably should do that," he said and hurried to open his phone. Y/n laughed and noticed the sinking feeling in his gut was already fading away.
- 𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞
hello, yes i'm alive
still and this chapter
is super delayed :)