I don't bother to raise my arms, "it took you long enough to grow a set of balls." Chuckling, I place my sword in its holder across my back. I turn around, leaning against the counter, crossing my arms. "I thought you were dead, Tori."
My blue eyes find the figure in front of me. My big sister is beautiful, even in her current disheveled shape. I've always yearned to look like her. Like me, she has fair skin and long, straight dark brown hair. Her skin pure, sans the freckles we share, not marred by tattoos, scars and piercings like mine. We stand at the same height, but she's certainly curvier. Her hazel eyes zero in on me in disbelief.
"Vanessa?!" She seems to be rooted in her spot at the front door; but for only a second. She runs over, dragging me into an embrace. "Oh my god! Where have you been?" Her words breathe against my ear.
I pull away but leaving my arms against hers. "I got stuck in Atlanta. My flight came in the day they sent bombs down all over the city. They evacuated the airport."
Her pretty face frowns, "that was years ago."
I hang my head, "yeah I know. It's a story for another time, Tor. Anyway," I dance out of her arms, searching my apartment, "where's the boys? I kind of put Aaron down, I'm sorry." I offer nonchalantly.
"Dead."
I sputter under that one word. "What happened?"
"Jamie! It's okay, come on out. It's just my baby sister." A little boy no older than twelve stalks out of my room, staring at me in fear. Oh right, Rick did mention I look like the human version of death in this outfit. It doesn't help that I kicked in the door with ease, but it was left unlocked. "This little boy was getting attacked... by this point, only Jason and Jared were with me. I lost all younger boys early on... They went to rescue him and didn't make it." She pulls out a chair, lowering herself down. I return to my position against the kitchen counter.
I wince, "they were just babies." Memories of Sophia surface. I quickly swallow it before my sister can register the change in my deposition. "I'm sorry." I gesture to the boy, "so you took him in."
"Yeah. I saw the truck out front. I thought someone had come in and I got worried for Jamie." She admits. "I was only a few blocks down. I take it that was you. Where did you get it?"
I remember seeing my white Volkswagen collecting dust and blood across the parking lot. There's no way it would be in any condition to drive with the state of affairs. It was already falling apart on me. Charlee had driven me to the airport while Wren talked about picking me up. Though, from my understanding, Kelly planned to show up to surprise me.
Our last fight mirrors mine and Daryl's so much; my heart sinks as the realization dawns on me.
I find Jamie, surveying him. His skin is tan, with green eyes and dark brown hair. Something I detect inside of him reminds me a bit of Daryl. Or maybe, I'm reaching, hoping to find even a crumb of something of him here. It's impossible, he's never left Georgia before everything crashed around us.
Jamie has the worn out glint of a survivor. He's watching me wearily, even though Victoria told him it was okay. That's good; being wary and untrusting of anyone he doesn't know might keep him alive a bit longer.
Daryl has that same, untrusting, guarded look ninety percent of the time, I muse. I sigh inwardly, I really fucking miss my other half.
I smirk, "the bike in the bed is mine, but I kind of stole the truck from some Charles Manson wannabe motherfucker." I shrug. "I see Owen was here." I motion to the paper behind me.
"I left that there in case you ever came back. Hopefully he's long dead." She peer down, fidgeting with her fingers. "I've been staying here because it's the safest place I could find."
"You didn't bother to clean?" I tease, but my face grows serious, "Yeah; he's not. I ran into him two days ago." I run my hand through my hair, frustrated at that thought of what had taken place that night.
Her eyes widen, and neck snaps in my direction. "What?!"
I shrug, "you got anything to eat here?" I turn, beginning to rummage through my cabinets coming up empty.
"No, that's why I left awhile ago before you showed up. You know I'm not going to let you skip over that, right? You're not changing the subject. What happened?!" She demands, hints of our mothers tone dances into her voice.
"I will, Tori. It's just a lot. I'd have to start at the beginning." I purse my lips, feeling tired and upset. "I was on the road for just about twelve hours. I want to rest." It was only a five hour trip, but stops had to made to refill the gas tank, and that alone took up to several hours.
"Go lie down. We will talk when you wake." I nod, heading off to my old room, crawling into my bed. Home sweet home, I muse bitterly. It feels so alien without Daryl next to me. Or knowing Rick was only across the road if something were to happen. Instead, my sister is only a few feet away, in my kitchen.
For the first time since I met Rick, I'm truly, and genuinely alone. I love my sister, but I don't know what this world brought out in her. I know if things go to shit, I can handle it, but her? I don't know. But I only have myself to blame for making such a ridiculous call. My hands find my stomach, but I did this for my sweet unborn.
I stir at the sound of low voices talking amongst themselves. I shoot up, slightly disoriented; for a moment, I forgot I was home, or why I ran home. For just a second, I expected to wake up to Daryl at my side, snoring softly away and Abraham pissing around in the bathroom.
My hand moves to what would be Daryl's side, finding it empty. I rub my face, remembering it's only my sister, and that boy - Jamie. I crawl out of bed, heading towards the kitchen. "I can go on a run soon, to get us food." My stomach growls in anticipation at the idea.
Victoria head snaps towards me, not hearing me shuffle out of the bed. "It's okay, I don't want you to get hurt."
I shrug, "it's no problem. I did a lot of running with Dary-" I trail off, hanging my head. "I can do it. I have enough experience."
"Vanessa..."
"I know." I wave my hand dismissively, "but it's been a long couple days and I've barely eaten. The last thing I ate kind of came up... it's just been a shitshow couple of days. And I'm pregnant. I need to find us something to eat." I chew on my lip.
"Then you're definitely not going." Victoria leaves no room for arguments, using moms tone to try and get her way. Again.
"Stop using moms' tone on me. The fuck I am. I'm pregnant, not disabled." I roll my eyes. "I know where to look." I stalk back into my room, pulling my boots on. "I'm going. You stay here, watch the boy. When I come back, I'll explain everything." I call out. I rifle around my room, searching for a bag to store whatever I'm able to scavenge.
I file back out of my room, pulling on the sword sheath, then putting my babies away in their home. Her eyes travel my body, scrutinizing curiously. "You really had this experience?"
I nod. "In the group I found, I was one of four that got sent on runs, a lot." I swallow hard, feeling out of place talking about my makeshift family to my own sister. I approach Victoria, grabbing her hand. "I promise, I'll tell you everything when I get back. I just need a moment, Tor."
"Okay. But before you go, I need to ask; is the father alive?" She quietly questions. I watch her face knowing she's thinking of Aaron. Memories of Daryl fly forward, both good and bad, but it still causes the warmth he made me feel to explode through my soul.
"I don't know." I admit. I pull my hand back, stalking to the door. I hear her footsteps follow behind while I head to the back, pulling my bike out. "There's a bag under the passenger seat. Take it into the apartment please."
I kick my legs over, turning on the ignition. I kick up dust and rocks as I fly out of the parking lot, on the hunt to find something to feed us.
Bag full and feeling accomplished, I park my bike on the sidewalk leading into my apartment. I open the door, smirking, "who is hungry?" I announce, tossing the bag down, before stopping dead in my tracks. The pictures I had taken are sprawled across the table. Victoria is standing over the pictures, face curious. I choke the anger out before it could burn through my veins.
Her eyes glance up, mouth falling open. "How?! I've been looking for days."
I shrug, "you need to trust me. I told you, I know what I'm doing." Sighing, "I get that you're the older sister but I'm not a baby anymore and I'd appreciate it if you would stop." I stalk over, eyes searching each picture. "I guess it's story time."
"Is the father here?" She gestures to the photos. I shake my head, reaching into my pocket. I hand it over, watching her survey the picture. "You look happy. He's good to you?"
"In his own way, yeah." I grin. "His name is Daryl."
"What do you mean?" She cocks her head at me, setting it next to Abraham's picture. I chew on my lip, trying to swallow the sob that's building in my throat.
I lower myself into the chair, "get comfortable, it's a long one." I motion to the chair across from me. My eyes find Jamie, "you can stay, but the story isn't for children. That's the only warning I'm giving you." I sit back, observing as they get situated. "Okay, I was on my own for two months before -" I point to Carol, "she lost her daughter when a herd was passing on the streets. I had ducked into the woods for safety." I grab Rick, Glenn, and Daryl's photo, "there was a fourth, but he isn't in this. They found me when they were searching. Rick asked me to join, noticing I was alone. Safety in numbers and all." Smiling, "Daryl held his crossbow to my head. I swore he was going to put an arrow through my skull; he looked pissed. Talk about first impressions, huh?"
Victoria's eyes widen, "he did what?"
"He's not exactly friendly and trusting, but it's okay." I continue to speak about our adventures, starting at the farm before the herd took us over into the several months on the road before finding the prison. I stumble when discussing my time with The Governor without scarring and traumatizing Jamie. I shine light on how Daryl discovered me, that I was barely alive, then turning around to leave with his brother. Charlee and Kelly were waiting for me on the other end when I finally came to, back at the prison. I lightly cover Kelly's training in the midst of the attacks from Phillip, into our several months of peace before I got sick and the eventual fall of the prison. I share a few jokes of the time Daryl and Kelly had the bright idea of me fighting hand to hand with mostly everyone in our family, and how the redneck was the only one to best me.
I use the pictures to reference family members, feeling sad and nostalgic- seeing the ones who have fallen staring back at me.
"So, you killed people." She chews on her lip, eyes travelling my face. "I had an idea something inside of you changed. But that was heavy..." she breaths out.
I laugh, "I'm not even halfway through." I tell her about the two-month separation, discovering Alexandria, finding myself on almost on the brink of death for a third time. I inform her about how Wren and Jordan were both there when I had arrived. The adventure I took that eventually reunited me with my family. I discuss Daryl's sudden mission about getting me to admit my feelings, and how I caved. I smile, remembering that night. I chuckle, reminiscing about how we met Jesus and finding out about other communities. Ending the story with the bullshit of the night we met Negan. I don't forget to mention our already few run ins with the saviors before that fateful nightfall. I admit my cowardice about why I had returned, bringing the story to a close.
I grin fondly, speaking in great detail about each person I met along the way, and how they had shaped me and the family.
She crosses her arms, "holy shit." I stand up, heading to the bag. I rifle about, searching for something the three of us can eat. I sigh, grabbing three cans of beans, passing them out before returning to my seat. "You need to go back."
I shake my head, "no."
She spreads her arms, "from what I gather, this group needs you. They seem to lean on you. This Negan guy has Daryl, and from the sounds of it, you make one hell of a team. Go back and get him." Her eyes travel to my stomach.
I hang my head, "Owen's back there..."
"Do you love this man?" She points to Daryl's picture.
"Yes."
She gathers the photos of everyone still breathing, throwing in Daryl's image, "You love them?" I nod, "and them?" She points to Glenn and Abraham.
"Yes..." I whisper.
"Fight for them, Vanessa." She stands up, approaching me, pulling me up so we are at eye level, "you will not be alone. I know I haven't been the best sister to you, but I'm going with you." Her hand finds my heart, "find this warrior you've become. She's there. I saw her today, before you left to get food, and just now, when you spoke." She finds my face, wiping the tears away, "I'm so proud of you. Mom and Dad would be, too." At my silence, she continues, "now, I'll return your things to your bag. I'll load up the truck, and I promise, I won't forget your bike. Go grab what you want or need. We are leaving in an hour."
"Okay, but I need to make some pit stops. Kelly has lots of weapons." I stalk off into my room without another word.
Daryl POV
Negan turns to Rick, grinning. "Whatever happened to that sick girl? That seemed like a hell of a stressful night for her. The way she was carrying on, she was married to number two, right? Careful. Careful how you're lookin' at me, Rick." Negan warns Rick through clenched teeth. "Widows, especially ones that look like that, they are special. I love 'em. Right after their husbands go, they are just empty inside. But usually not for long. Ahh. Where is she? I would love to see her. And Elvira, I haven't seen her lurking around any dark corners."
I perk up, knowing he's talking about Vanessa. The last thing I saw was Negan shoving her down. I was hoping I would get a glimpse of her; I need to know how she's doing. I need to know she's okay. We got into a fight, barely mended our relationship before everything went to shit.
I've been holding onto those words we shared before we were forced out of the truck.
Father Gabriel quietly speaks up, smiling, "do you care to pay your respects?"
Negan grabs for his cold heart, "Holy crap! You are creepy as shit, sneaking up on me, wearin' that collar with that freaky-ass smile."
"My apologies. I'm Father Gabriel."
Maggie is dead?!
"She didn't make it? Damn tragedy. That's what this is. Well, this must really suck for you guys. Number one? That was on me. No choice there. Lessons had to be learned. But number two? That didn't need to happen. Daryl, there, and Vanessa, forced my hand. Probably put her right on her back, huh? You didn't answer me about Morticia."
"She's gone. We haven't seen her since she got into a fight with this asshole here." Kelly slams his body against mine. "Get out of my way, redneck trash."
I smirk inwardly feeling a piece of paper between my skin and Negan's makeshift prison jumpsuit. Kelly is brilliant. I can see why Vanessa fell in love with him; for some awful reason, she choose me, but I'm not going to argue. God, or whatever is out there, seems pretty upset with me. I'm not going to take my chances and tempt fate.
"Hey! Get away from him. Who the fuck are you?" Negan shouts, glowering at Kelly for crashing the party.
He shrugs, "he was in my way. My bad. I'm Kelly. He stole Vanessa from me." Kelly sneers. My eyes find his hands; growing thankful for all the runs we took together. He found a away to to deliver a message under Negan's watchful eye. She's okay, she went home. I glance down at my feet, not wanting to give away the relief pouring through me.
But, it's quickly choked out. She went home? She ran, and I have a feeling I know why. She's trying to protect herself and our baby; she doesn't feel safe.
"He stole her from you?" Negan smirks. "It makes sense why she would be with you, not him." He points his finger at me. "That's hilarious. Do you know what she sees in Daryl?!" He laughs. Anger begins to burn through me. "'Cause I'm still trying to figure out that puzzle myself."
Shouting by mine and Vanessa's house drags us over in that direction. "What the hell is going on?" Negan bellows. My eyes widen, seeing Owen and Jordan arguing. Jordan lands a punch on Owen's face. Pride swells in me. Vanessa has a lot of people in her corner. She didn't have to run. Jordan jumps on top of him, hitting Owen a couple dozen more. Blood begins to ooze out of Owen's mouth and nose. "Nope, we ain't doing this!" I watch in horror, seeing Negan give Owen some sort of signal.
"No!" Wren shouts as Owen takes out his pistol, putting a bullet in Jordan's head. His body crumples on top of Owen. Owen tosses him off, sneering. But I spot an excited gleam behind his green eyes. Wren lowers herself down, taking Jordan's lifeless body into her arms, sobbing. "I hate you, Owen." She whimpers. "For this. For almost killing my best friend. You're lucky she isn't here. She'd kill you from you stand." Wren's face twists in anger and contempt.
Charlee seemingly appears out of thin air, putting her hand on the redhead's shoulder, "if she ever comes back, I hope she kills you. If not, I will." Her promise is dripping in venom.
Charlee is someone that I've learned that has a lot of pent up, quiet rage. She mirrors her brother in having a knack for violence, but doesn't flaunt it as her twin does. She's just scary as Vanessa. I've learned to not underestimate people because Vanessa and Charlee are two innocent appearing people who love chaos and have the blood of warriors pumping through their veins.
My eyes find Jordan. I didn't get a chance to really know him, but I know Blue would've cut Owen from where he stands for killing her ex-husband. From my understanding, there is no bad blood between them. They were able to maintain a friendship outside of the divorce.
This isn't going to end well, if she ever finds out what happened. If she comes back.
"Awe, did I chase her away?" Owen grins, long brown hair blowing in the wind, giving him the image of the real villain standing before us.
Kelly runs over, seething, "What the fuck? Owen, I should've fucking killed you for what you did to Vanessa!" He snarls. His brown eyes find Negan, "you really are a piece of shit for having someone like him in your company." He points to Owen, "this man almost kills Vanessa, gets out of prison, and you take him in?" He scoffs, "one of these days, one of us is going to kill you, Owen. You're a big pussy ass bitch." I observe as he storms off, rage radiating off of him in waves. "Need a big scary man to protect him because he ain't nothing but a bitch." He growls. "Pussy."
Negan's face unreadable as he takes in the words around him. His own eyes find Owen; it almost seems like he's seeing him in a new light. Negan glances at me, face angry and curious.
I close my eyes, feeling helpless. Her friends are hurting, and there's nothing I can do. Now, she's gone, because I can't protect her. I feel myself fall down into the spiral of pain and anger as it swirls around me, silently.
Daryl,
I hope you can forgive me, but I had to run. With Owen being back, I'm scared he'll try to do something to our baby. I had to leave to protect our unborn; I hope you can understand that if you're alive.
I don't know if I'll be back. If not, I told Rick he needs to fight, even if he's scared. He needs to push through that to avenge you, Glenn, and Abraham. If you get out and I don't return, don't come looking for me. I don't plan on leaving a trail.
You changed my life. I've never loved anyone so much and so deeply. Thinking back, I'm pretty sure I started falling for you shortly after meeting you. Dumb, right? But you were different, and I could feel it. Broken people find broken people, and our broken pieces just fit together, creating a whole badass, unstoppable team. Even after you put that crossbow in my face, I was still so curious about you. My first thought was, 'my would be killer is beautiful.' I wanted to know you. I was more curious, then terrified. Denise mentioned that she doesn't think I was ever afraid of you, and she's right. I was only afraid of the things I felt around you.
At the prison, after you returned with Merle, it was easier to be mad and push you away, then deal with the raw uncut feelings I had coursing through my veins. Because I don't do feelings; but with you, I'm trying.
You're my soulmate, Daryl.
I'm sorry about keeping the pregnancy from you. I'm sorry for not telling you right then and there about Owen. I'm sorry about our fight and what I said. I wish we didn't leave things like that.
I love you,
Blue.