ashtray
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the rest of the drive was silent. for the most part at least.
valerie sat there in silence but rue seemed like she was having the time of her life, pretty much ignoring everything that happened.
fezco didn't say much, he was the same however, i, on the other hand, i was overcome with so many different emotions at the same time.
i sat there thinking about valerie mostly.
i saw the way bj looked at valerie, and the way she acted in the moment.
she let it happen, she allowed it happen.
did she like him?
no. she doesn't like him. she just had to do what she had to do.
i could be wrong though, valerie didn't fight back or anything and from the time i've spent around her, she would stand up for herself.
as fezco started to slow down, i snapped back from my train of thought and looked towards a brightly lit up house, pretty much vibrating from the loud music.
'ight, get out. i'll worry about the car.' fez sighed as rue jumped out the car, valerie following with her head down.
i got out and walked a respectable distance from the two girls.
as i walked in, a mix of alcohol and sweat hit my nostrils, causing me to flinch and walk quicker to the back.
i walked though the crowd, keeping my eyes on valerie who walked slowly and carefully, her head still down.
i felt bad for her but the thought of her and bruce was stuck in my head. and it wasn't going to leave anytime soon.
valerie
i walked through the cluster of people and reached the back door, pushing slightly to pass.
i walked to a couch with a couple other people on and sat down.
'yo,' one of the guys said, nodding his head to me with a smirk plastered on his face.
'hey.' i said serenely, looking around the small circle. 'i don't think we've talked before. i've seen you around school though.' he babbled, 'oh, im uziah.' he quickly added with a chuckle as the two random girls sniggered and rolled their eyes at him.
'cmon, do better uziah.' one of the girls scoffed, slapping his knee flirtatiously.
'uhm, im valerie.' i said uncomfortably as the music from inside the house faded which was followed by a bunch of groans.
'nice name.' he said as a felt a heavy hand drop onto my shoulder.
i turned around and saw ash looking down at me, his eye brows furrowed and his lips pressed together.
i looked back towards the two girls who sat there whispering at each other, glancing at ash. 'oh... you didn't tell me you have a boyfriend. is he even your boyfriend anyways?' one of the girls laughed.
i swear i was going to slap a bitch in a second. 'yeah, im her boyfriend.' ash said, tugging at my shoulder, indicating to get up.
i laughed awkwardly and got up, hearing unintelligible mutter between the group whom i was just sitting with.
'what was that for?' i questioned, peaking at ashs face. he was scarily serious. 'you know why, stop acting like that.' ash ululated, pulling me by my arm towards a different couch on the other side of the swimming pool.
i shrugged, sitting down in front of him, unconsciously moving my head to the beat of the song that was playing.
'you gon ignore me?' ash sighed, obviously tired of my bullshit. and so was i.
'look, im not bothered to argue, let's just enjoy the night. it's been shit and im just tryna change that.' i breathed, getting up and sitting next to him, moving myself closer to his chest.
i felt his chest rise and then lower slowly, 'im sorry.' i whispered. 'it's cool, ma.' he replied, kissing the top of my head. i felt myself relax under him, forgetting about earlier, which, was honestly all i needed right now.
'10... 9... 8...' loud chants echoed around the area, counting down.
oh shit its new years.
i looked up to ash who sat there motionless, looking ahead. 'wanna go inside?' i asked, pulling my dress down because it kept riding up.
'nah it's cool, i like it here. just us two.' he smiled slightly. but it wasn't fake or anything. i think.
it looked and felt genuine.
'5... 4... 3...'
i smiled back at ash and straightened myself up, sitting along side him but with my knees facing ash.
'2... 1... happy new years!'
ashtray leaned in and kissed me, cupping my face in the process while loud shouts and cheers came from inside the house. my head was spinning but for all the right reasons.
as bad as shit might've been this year, and how fucking dangerous too, i would not change anything about it.
not the people.
not how i feel.
not my school. surprisingly.
and definitely not my boyfriend.
we pulled apart and looked at each other. 'happy new years valerie.' he said softly.
'happy new years ashtray.' i repeated.
au
sorry for not posting, i've been having shit writers block for a while now.
here's a short chapter just to get myself used to writing again
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