[Rapunzel by Drapht plays on Vinyl]
"This isn't Punk."
"I know."
"I thought we were going to listen to Punk Rock? You know, since you had a point to prove as to why most of it doesn't suck..."
"Stop moving. This is the last time I tell you, Cabello."
"Sorry. Why aren't we listening to Punk?"
"Because I'm switching it up. I do listen to different types of music, y'know, and they're all good. What's the matter, you don't dig it?"
"Oh I love it! It's so cool, I could play it over and over. I was just—"
"Oye—"
"Sorry! I have a hard time staying still for long, I'm so sorry. But yeah, I'm just surprised. I was thinking maybe you've given up on your mission to sway me."
Lauren stepped away from her canvas with her tongue poking out her lips, her eyes darting between her graphite drawing of Karla and the girl herself posing and holding up two of Lauren's most prized Punk/Grunge records. She hummed and squinted, the corners of her lips raising in a faux smile. "I don't know. I don't think I'm satisfied with it."
"Oh no, not this again. This is your third and final draft, you're not scrapping another drawing and I'm not standing around as unmoving as a tree for a minute longer," Karla carefully dropped the records and skipped across the creaky floorboards to join Lauren seven feet away, at the center of the barn.
"I kinda don't wanna show you though. It sucks. And I don't want you to look at yourself and think it sucks, too. It'd be disrespectful to you," Lauren shied away, hugging the canvas to her chest.
"Show me or else I'm changing my mind and I'm not giving you my last fruit roll up like I promised. I won't judge it if it's bad."
"No."
"Are you serious?"
"Let's just forget it. Your drawing of me is so much better, maybe it's best you look in the mirror and draw yourself."
"No, we both agreed to draw each other and stick to whatever we come up with. It's not supposed to look perfect or spot on, it's supposed to look exactly like what you see me as. I'll take any other version of myself, especially if you're the one who came up with it, thank you very much. Now give it," Karla held out her palm and smacked the tips of her fingers against it. She convinced Lauren when she bowed her head and raised her eyebrows as a warning.
"Fine. Take the stupid drawing, do whatever you want with it," Lauren grumbled and got away from her like she had just set off a three second bomb. She threw herself onto the blanket Karla set up and dug into the brown bag of whatever snacks was left, discarding the many wrappers of eaten cosmic brownies, butter crunch cookies and sour patch kids.
Karla's smile grew impossibly large, shrinking her eyes as she admired the drawing of herself that happened to be entirely different from what she expected. Instead of copying and pasting what Lauren saw in the barn, she had a cartoon version of Karla standing triumphant over a tall hill of music records, holding the albums 'Smash' by The Offspring and "Nevermind" by Nirvana, a halo overhead, and her face complete with a sultry stare rather than the real life cheesy smile she wore.
"What's the meaning of this? Why this?"
Lauren shrugged, her back turned to Karla. "Whatever meaning you wanna attach to it. Explanation kills the art."
"In this case, an explanation is the point of the whole thing."
"I stand by what I said. It's pretty lame though, right?"
A huff of air left Karla's nose as her eyes shut and she shook her head. She set aside the canvas before moving over to drop to her knees and throw herself onto Lauren, nearly knocking her over with her weight as she hugged her. "No. Why do you downplay everything you do and discredit yourself before anybody has the chance to? Won't you just let me love the things you do before you decide I hate it?"
"I can't stand somebody being disappointed in me after I had hopes for them not to be. People love to shit all over things anyone spends time on and puts a lot of effort into or is proud of. Why give them the satisfaction of making you feel bad if you can say you hate it too and it's not a big deal?" Lauren shoved a piece of a brownie into her mouth then broke off a larger chunk, slightly shifting her head in Karla's direction. "Here. You want some?"
"Feed it to me," she opened her mouth and leaned in to meet Lauren's hand halfway, taking the brownie into her mouth with a single bite. As a reward for Lauren's never ending generosity, Karla gave her a kiss on the cheek before repositioning herself to sit across from the girl. "I really wish you'd stop seeing me as everybody else. Hard to feel lonely in this friendship when I have the whole world right beside me I can't ever be separate from."
"Sorry. I know you're not like everybody else."
"Do you? Because we keep coming back to this."
"Well. I said I know you're not like everybody else, I never said I trust that you're not like everybody else."
"Knowing and trusting are the same things, Jauregui."
"Do you know for a fact that there is a God or do you just trust that there is one?"
A moment of contemplative silence. "Okay. That makes sense."
"It's like me knowing I'm gonna see you at school tomorrow because you have perfect attendance or you say you're going to be there, but me not trusting it anyway. I don't know."
Karla ripped open the fruit roll-up wrapper and began peeling away at the paper, separating it from the candy. "We're gonna split this, okay? And we're gonna give our tongues a tattoo."
"Sweet," Lauren scooted closer and crossed her legs in a pretzel, leaning forward. She accepted the long piece into her palm and waited for Karla's cue so they could stick the fruit flavoured candy to their tongues—specifically the parts with a printed drawing on it.
Both girls giggled helplessly and gave up on speaking after misunderstanding each other and finding it futile, as they'd only speed up the process of saliva finding its way to drip out their mouths and risk the drawing on the candy not transferring onto their tongues correctly. Karla dipped over and under Lauren's chin to swoop up and bite off a piece of her candy, then got away like a bandit as Lauren protested and chased after her.
"You are so fucking sneaky! You're insufferable, Cabello, I can't ever trust you—come here! Don't you run away from me," Lauren clawed at the air, missing Karla's shirt as the younger girl dodged her like a football player on a mission to make it in the end zone. The brunette's hysterical laughter was contagious, Lauren couldn't hold off any longer. She indulged in her games some more, battled again and again to catch her, and eventually she succeeded but only because Karla gave in. "I said come here," she husked, yanking her close by the arm, their bodies an inch away from colliding.
"You saw me coming and did nothing."
"Fuck you. I didn't think you'd steal from me, I thought you were just being weird. Was it worth it? Let me see your tongue."
"No," Karla backed away from Lauren, smirking.
"Open your mouth," Lauren persisted in her demands as well as her footsteps, backing Karla into a corner.
"Make me."
"Fine. Because you're fair for the most part, I'll show you mine first and you'll have no choice but to go after me. Look," Lauren stuck out her tongue, showcasing the faded print of a random doodle.
"Wooow, very nice."
"Yeah? It isn't messed up?"
"Nope!" Karla stopped when her back hit the part of the wall she and Lauren painted weeks ago.
"Your turn. Open your mouth, show me that what you did was worth i—"
The force of Karla's lips against hers winded her and threw her off every kind of balance that existed. Lauren responded by matching her eagerness, although Karla's lips pushed against hers a lot more harder. No time to catch her breath longer than a millisecond in between kisses, no time to fully process that this was what they were doing now or to even speak out against it. Karla kept Lauren locked in with her hands grabbing at her face, controlling its movement as she kissed her any way she wanted to, for as long as she wanted to, and at a fast pace, venting every frustration over pent up desire without holding back. Lauren lost every ounce of awareness in her body apart from her lips and remained there, frozen and forgetful on how to move her hands or why it was important to do so. But that didn't seem to matter much, as Karla took care of grabbing them and placing them on her hips before she clutched the neck of Lauren's plain faded purple t-shirt for dear life, silently begging for Lauren to find a way that'd bring them impossibly closer.
Lauren dropped Karla's lips and jerked her head back when Karla tried going in for more. She chuckled and fought to catch her breath. "Relax," she whispered, waiting for Karla to open her eyes.
"Lauren...I feel it again," Karla refused to look her in the eyes or leave the dreamy state she was currently in. She bit her lip and tightened her grip on Lauren's shirt. "What do I do now?"
"Y-you mean you're..." Lauren instinctively side eyed the door to leave the barn, panicking. A rivet formed between her brows. "You're wet?"
"Mhm," she nodded frantically. "Are you?"
"Um...I don't know what you want me to do...exactly..." she dragged out. "I am but...I don't know. What are you expecting?"
"We don't have to touch each other, like I said in the library," Karla finally opened her eyes, searching for clarity and for anything in Lauren's gaze that she wasn't vocally communicating. "We can keep our clothes on and do stuff—whatever feels right or feels good to you. It's just practicing for...you know...your boyfriend and my boyfriend. Figure out what makes us turned on enough to wanna do it."
"Are you sure this is a good idea? I mean, I don't know what to do. We'd probably be better off watching porn or something."
"I don't know about you but it's impossible for me to get my hands on porn. Besides, I probably wouldn't like it. We'll just do what we usually do with our boyfriends then decide on whether or not the experiment was successful."
"How would we know?"
//
With a gentle hand against her chest, Karla surrendered to the force and lied down on her back over the white floral duvet, her lips slowly engaging with Lauren's. Her fingertips ran up and down Lauren's arms in feathery touches before they reached the sides of her body, soon falling and settling on her hips that met her own. Karla gasped as Lauren shifted without her lips breaking contact with her skin as she descended and kissed on her neck. Her back arched and the warm, wet sensation—the baited breaths and the pressure against certain spots on her neck opened the gates to her stomach for more butterflies to enter and swarm around it like bees to honeycombs. She was careful not to moan like the last time and scare Lauren off, but man was she dying to let it all out. Her hips bucked to their own volition and she discovered that the friction between their centers was something she needed to keep doing, since it only got better with repetition. And Lord only knows the life changing things that could happen next if she continued.
"Does any of this feel good? You have to tell me," worry evident on Lauren's face as she looked down at Karla.
The cheerleader gifted her with tranquility when a delicate smile graced her lips and she nodded blissfully while caressing Lauren's flushed cheek. "Do whatever you want to me, I'm sure it'll feel better than we'd expect."
"It's just...you're supposed to moan when it feels good and I haven't heard shit from you," she sat upright, threading her fingers through her hair, brushing it back with a huff.
"Oh? That means you won't react like I've pushed some kind of red button this time?" giggled Karla.
"No. So either you start letting me know if I'm doing something right or I'll assume—"
Karla tackled Lauren onto the floor and swiftly straddled her hips, attacking her lips with a mixture of tenderness and a level of eroticism Lauren has never been acquainted with outside her daydreams before. And when she started rocking, grinding down with a roughness Lauren was far from minding, a moan wasn't far from following right after. Karla moaned into her mouth first then broke the kiss to emit her shallow breaths, her moans increasing in frequency along with their synchronized rhythmic thrusts. She began to focus more and attempted to picture Eli making her feel this way.
Lauren stared at Karla, so unsure of herself and puzzled as to how Karla could be so confident and ok with all of this meanwhile she couldn't even let go all the way. She wanted so badly to grab her breasts, kiss all over her body, moan with her, thrust her hips, be as enthusiastic as she was but there was this fucking barrier keeping her from doing so. This was so wrong. All of it. And she felt awful for indulging but it felt way too good to even stop. Her overthinking must've translated because Karla opened her eyes and looked down with concern, gladly leaving her state of euphoria just to check in with Lauren.
"What's wrong? Is it me? Are you ok?"
"No, it's not you. It's me. It isn't easy for me to get comfortable," she turned her head the other way.
"You mean you feel ashamed?"
"Kinda..."
"Why? It's not like we're doing this for real or like either of us is gay. I'd actually consider it as an after school program that contributes to better performance for the real deal," she smiled and gently nudged Lauren's chin back in her direction. "Hey...we can stop anytime. We've covered enough grounds, right?"
Lauren winced then covered her face, groaning. "I'm sorry. It's always me putting an end to these things, only this time I really don't want to. I just don't fucking know what to do, I'm sorry."
"Don't be sorry. Did you at least enjoy it?" Karla got off of Lauren and fixed her hair. She glanced at the area between her legs and swallowed dryly, disconcerted with its rapid heartbeat and how sitting down felt like she was swimming in a puddle.
"Part of the reason why I'm drowning in guilt. And confusion. We did the same things Danny and I do, only it feels a million times better. I don't fucking get it," Lauren maneuvered herself into a crouching position before springing to her feet. She stomped over to turn off the music playing on the barn's designated record player.
"Don't you worry, you'll feel it with him. Maybe you just need to let yourself enjoy it and be in the moment for a change. That'd probably help," Karla remained seated, palms stretched behind her, legs extended with her feet swinging back and forth as she surveyed her surroundings and recalled all the fun she and Lauren had inside the barn today.
"Are you uhhh...planning on doing it anytime soon with Eli?" asked Lauren, crouched down and rummaging through her backpack for the joint she rolled this morning. She found it though she continued to pretend to look for it.
"Probably this weekend or the next. I'm not sure yet."
"Oh no? Why not?"
"Good question. I think I want us to keep experimenting with each other juuust a little bit more before I take it there with him."
"Oh. Okay," Lauren said with disdain. She put her joint to her lips and lit up, taking the biggest hit with her fist balled between her legs as she pictured Karla and Eli together.
***
Carlie delayed her exit from the girl's locker room after she had finished showering off the sweat from the vigorous activities done in gym class today. The chatty girls disappeared one by one, two by two, and even group by group, all of them headed for the double doors blocked off by the teacher refusing to let anybody out until the bell ringed. She pretended to nurse her bruised, scraped knee she already took care of cleaning and healing several minutes ago, and took her sweet time putting on her platform shoes after her pastel pink knee socks. Her movements resembled a sloth or at least an absent-minded grandma in need of extra assistance. And when her friends passed her by, exchanging some words, she drew extra attention to herself with the high volume of her unnecessary laughs and indiscretions over her weekly plans and thoughts.
The only girls left in the locker room were two losers named Tara and Fatima, who rarely showed up to any class and did nothing but talk anytime they did show up, and the super slut Marilyn Jauregui who surprised everyone by participating in running the mile and a game of kickball today. Marilyn played longer and harder than any girl there, took longer to shower, and took even longer to get dressed. She sat on that bench diagonal to Carlie in her red towel for ages, engaging in never ending conversation Carlie previously wasn't privileged enough to overhear thanks to her peers and their obnoxious the noise level. But now...now Carlie could hear everything.
"He's taking me to finally meet his parents this Thursday. We're all having dinner at this Italian joint over in Biscayne boulevard, it's supposed to be, like, wicked expensive, you know, 'cause it's fine dining. And August is such a gentleman, he always pays for everything. Won't even let me pick up my wallet. If I do, he gets sad," Marilyn raved, habitually pausing the action of rubbing lotion onto her legs just to talk with her hands. "It's my first time being treated like this by a boy, I didn't think they existed."
"I still don't think they exist. And if they do, they're totally pretending. My daddy says they don't make 'em like they used to. Times are changing and the men won't even be men anymore. And it's true, I mean they all complain about their responsibilities when it comes to dating and are helpless when it comes to knowing how to treat a lady," said Fatima, kicking her legs back and forth, seated across from Marilyn.
"That's why it's so much better to snag yourself an older guy. Ugh, I'd KILL to meet one right now and have him take me away from all this. The true man of my dreams," Tara tossed her head back with her hands over her heart. "Mare, you've dated older men before. Overrated or highly underrated? Prove my point here."
"Tara, they're all creeps. And the only reason they'd go out with girls twice their junior is because they can't let go of their teenage years or they just want to be in a position of power so that we'd look up to them and be dependent on them. You only see the appeal if they're rich and not looking for anything serious," Marilyn lifted her falling towel, wrapping it tighter around her large breasts dangerously close to spilling out and flashing everyone. "Could you pass me my underwear and my jeans? Thanks."
Carlie hissed and grunted as her hand flew to her mouth when she tasted blood and realised the agonizing pain from biting the inside of her cheek too hard. She disregarded the girls' heads whipping in her direction and acted as though she were oblivious to their presence. A mere innocent fly on the wall capable of doing no harm. Disgruntled, she stood up and yanked open her locker door, snatching her books one by one, tucking them into her arm. When she turned back around, her breath hitched at the sight of Marilyn dressing herself while staring directly at her, a smug look on her face. Carlie's heart beat harder than Marilyn kicked that ball today—and Marilyn kicked it harder than every athletic boy in that class—and her legs weakened like wet spaghetti. She scowled at the Jauregui twin and lost the staring contest, as she couldn't take it anymore.
"What's the matter, Carlie? No insult for me today? Never seen you last this long in my presence without one before. I have to say I'm impressed."
"Aw. Missing my attention?" Carlie countered, mocking her.
"Come on! One for the road, hit me with your best shot, get me buzzed," she encouraged, squeezing into her tight black jeans.
Carlie clutched the lapel of her pink tartan blazer and teetered along the lockers, maintaining a safe distance between her and Marilyn on her way out. "I won't give you the satisfaction today. Try not to obsess over me because of it though."
"Won't be easy but I'll do my best," Marilyn smiled at her pushing and bolting through the door. She sneered and rolled her eyes. "Nosy bitch."
On the other side, Carlie was red in the face and ears. She grunted over the school bell and stomped across the gymnasium floors, complaining through gritted teeth, "Urgh! Why does she have to be such a slut!? I fucking hate her."
"Hate who?" Normani sidled up from behind her, offering Carlie a side hug and a friendly cheek kiss. "You cool?"
"I'm just annoyed, that's all. No big," Carlie composed herself, sweeping her hair away from her face. She did herself a good service by smiling and reciprocating Normani's warmth. "What's new with you, girlie?"
"Sooo Travis and I started talking again. I know, I know, before you give me that look I remember what I said but I swear he's changed this time. He apologised, he even bought me flowers attached to this cute little teddy bear and left me the sweetest note," Normani mooned over the recollection, a spring in her step as they navigated the crowded halls. "He wants to come to cheer practice this afternoon and watch me. We might go hang out at the mall after if you wanna come join. Ooh, but if you do come with us, don't mention any boy I've been messing with recently, I don't want him to think I was never serious about him."
Carlie sighed. "Everything is always about boys, isn't it?"
-
"So what's up with you and that Camila girl? You tutoring her now, supposedly?" imposed Danny, all cozied up to his girlfriend just trying to enjoy her lunch in the cafeteria. "I thought that was just a joke you were tellin'."
"Yes, I'm going to be tutoring her. She's paying me, I could use some cash, so I thought 'fuck it'. Can't hurt, can it?" Lauren picked up her pizza boat and inhaled it like it'd be her last meal. She could barely keep her eyes open all the way and it wasn't because of her loopy smile or tiredness. "Why?"
"I thought you two hated each other. Besides, she doesn't even hang out with you like you swore she would, and she's dating that little bitch on the football team."
"Relax, babe, I'm not doing it for free. Like I said, there is cash involved."
"You gonna blow it all on more weed?" Julian wiggled his eyebrows. Now there was a person who did a lot more than she did before the lunch bell. You'd think he had pink eye or someone poured bleach into his sockets.
"No. 'The Suicide Machines' are comin' to town and they're playing at the Nasty Cherry Pit and I want every part of it," Lauren scarfed down the other half of her pizza then washed it down with the Dr. Pepper bought from the vending machine. She punched her chest and belched.
"Ugh, gross," Miles scooted away from her, a grimace frozen on his face.
Julian and Danny clapped and amused Lauren by turning it into a contest. Per usual, Danny won that battle and Lauren lost whatever was left of her soda.
"We're all going, right?" asked Miles.
"Of course. I'll never miss a show with you guys."
"Famous. We'll make a whole night of it. I petition for none of us to go home that day and to stick together. Oh, and for my little brother to tag along. Poor Chucky's been getting the worst of my dad's wrath lately, this'll be the best thing for him," said Julian. The casual way he always brought up the abuse happening in his home made it feel so normal and trivial that none of them knew how to address it, and none of them could tell just how bad it really was. It was no different than him mentioning he got black out drunk and fell asleep someplace unfamiliar and dirty.
"Not a problem. I miss the lil guy, it's gonna be so cool for him to see a show and go nuts. Probably will do him some good to let it out and rage with the rest of us," said Danny.
"Yeah, mate," Julian sniffed, vigorously wiping his nose. His eyes went wide and he leaned back with open arms. "Marilyn! So nice of you to finally join us. And where have you been?"
"Yeah, what's up with you disappearing?" Miles pat the spot next to him for her to sit down at. The charge in his interrogation significantly reduced when she hugged him and gave him a big kiss on the cheek, leaving her lipstick mark on his dark caramel skin.
"Sorry, sorry. I won't explain myself but I will make it up to you guys. I've been planning something totally out of this world insane, you're not gonna believe it," Marilyn drummed her hands on the grey round table, looking as mischievous as ever.
"What is it this time? Are you planning on forming a cult?" Lauren jested, barely holding herself up, her cheek supported by her palm. Karla escaping the rain in the quad and rushing into the cafeteria alongside Eli, Dinah and Andy fixed her laziness and sobered her up real quick.
"I thought I already formed one with you idiots? I'm the leader here, you all do what I say and follow me around all the time."
"True," said Miles.
"And guess who's next in line?" Julian pointed at himself. "Keep making yourself scarce, I have fucked up plans of my own for world domination beginning with this table."
"What's up, Mare?" Danny redirected the conversation.
"Hear me out. We all love drugs, right? The good kind? Not the fry your brain kind, I don't mean that."
"Yes, of course. Go on..." Lauren insisted, her eyes following Karla around the cafeteria. The two briefly locked eyes except Karla didn't smile back. In fact, she seemed very disappointed and disinterested in Lauren.
"I've been asking around for something new to try for the holidays, just for fun and ONLY ONCE 'cause I don't want us to go crazy. I found a connect that can hook us hook up," Marilyn looked around before inclining forward, bringing the group closer. "You ever hear of a drug called microdot?"
"Nah."
"No."
"What is it?"
Lauren tuned out and sulked over Karla's indifference toward her. It was different today; she wasn't pretending because she had to put on a front to avoid being questioned by her friends. It genuinely looked like she couldn't stand the sight of Lauren...like one glance would give her the biggest stomachache. Another thing that was different about her was that she was all over Eli, constantly demanding his attention, pushing him to be more affectionate with her. She initiated everything from their kisses to their hand holding, cuddling, putting her leg over his lap and planting his hand on her inner thigh—everything. She didn't force it either, the signs of her pretending were absent. And when Lauren took the liberty of throwing out her lunch tray in the trash bin all the way on the other side of the cafeteria instead of in the one right next to her table, she lingered in hopes the preppy cheerleader would meet her pleading gaze and communicate back that there was nothing to be concerned about.
Karla did meet her gaze. And when she did, Lauren was remorseful that she wasn't careful with what she wished for. The look Molly gave Lauren that day the scandal of them being gay broke out in the entire school was nothing compared to the one Karla was giving her now. And the final nail in the coffin was her whispering something to Eli, stirring in her seat as the boy found Lauren and immediately shared the same sentiments, and the couple leaving the table together in a hurry with Eli looking back over his shoulder with a protective arm locked around Karla's waist.
What the fuck.
*
10/24/1995
Since that day last week when Camila and I experimented some more, things between us have changed. At first we became closer and the kissing became frequent. We never did it on school grounds though, neither of us would allow it, nor were we that stupid. On Saturday, we tried it again. We did the same thing only this time I let go a little bit and allowed myself to accept that I was enjoying myself...that it felt so good and it was okay for me to experience it. I think that was the first time I moaned and meant it. And she liked it, she wanted me to do it more. But of course, I stopped it before it could escalate—and it was about to escalate, which she didn't seem to mind although I DID. I looked at her and wondered why she was so invested in doing this and still hasn't hooked up with her boyfriend yet...why there was always an excuse not to...and why she kept pushing me to do more...
After that, I guess things really did begin to change and I wasn't overthinking after all. At first, she'd say hello after I did but she wouldn't stick around to chat. She didn't show up to the library when I sent her a note saying that we should meet. She agreed to let me tutor her for math and even set up a date she could show up for...but I think that was just some sort of trick. I don't know if that makes sense. Like when you tell a friend you're going to hang out with them and it'll be next week even though you're lying, it's just that you don't want them to feel bad or face them when you know that they know you are avoiding them on purpose. And today...today was very different overall. It was as though I offended her...like I was some sort of creep watching her, some predator she knew the truth about and needed to get away from. And with Eli...God, what did she tell Eli? Do they talk about me? Does he know what we do or did she tell him but twisted the truth around like Molly did?
I'm so worried. What the hell did I do? Why won't she come by my house anymore or to the barn? Why doesn't she speak to me or look at me the same? I think I made a mistake. I don't think I should tell myself I'm overthinking anymore...I never am.
"Yo! Knock knock, it's me again. You already know what I'm hear fo—" Marilyn froze and turned into a protective mama bear when she saw her sister jump to hide her composition notebook and wipe her cheeks. Marilyn shut and locked the door before leaping across the messy room, diving onto Lauren's bed to cradle her in her arms. "What's wrong? Why are you crying? Who did it? Is it Daniel?"
"No. It's nothing, I'm just being stupid," Lauren sniffled and continued wiping her damp face. "Nothing new under the sun except for me getting burned."
"What do you mean by that? What the hell happened?"
"Noth—"
"Look, if you're going to keep up with your stubbornness and hide all your secrets from me, at least tell me who our enemy is and how serious it is on a scale of one to ten. I need to know who to look out for and when some ass needs to be kicked, and I'm not playing, Lo," Marilyn replaced Lauren's hands with her own and dried her face completely. She let Lauren go and moved to sit beside her, leaving her hand on her knee as she waited patiently for a response that wouldn't come. "If not Danny, is it that girl I warned you about getting close with?"
"No, no it isn't her. I promise it's just me being an idiot. I burned myself by being stupid and I feel so dirty because of it. I promise I'm my own enemy, there's no one else to blame," Lauren spoke fast.
Marilyn's eye twitched. A red flag Lauren was very familiar with; her sister didn't believe her. The longer Marilyn went without speaking or blinking or even averting her eyes to focus on something other than Lauren, the weaker Lauren's resistance. She hated whenever Marilyn did that. She despised her sister abusing that superpower like Wonder Woman with her lasso. But this time...this time she really couldn't say anything to her. And Marilyn grasped that reality after a full ten seconds had gone by.
"Don't let me find out. No, shh, zip it, I don't want you to say anything more, you're just gonna argue with me and I'm not in the mood tonight. Just listen to me. Don't let me find out and get confirmation on what I think is going on. Because if something terrible can be avoided, I'm going to be the first one there taking whatever action necessary, whether you agree with it or not. We are NOT having a bad senior year, okay, I REFUSE to let anything similar to what happened last year happen to you again. Count on it."
Lauren nodded and hugged her knees to her chest. Quietly, "Thanks, Mare."
"You're welcome. Now. I know it's awkward to ask, especially after all this, but I need you to cover for me again and to also lend me at least twenty bucks from your piggy bank. I know you have at least fifty bucks saved up, I went through your things when you weren't home in case you had the indecency to lie to me. I promise I'll pay you back."
Lauren couldn't help but laugh at how ridiculous—how shamelessly honest, and how consistent her sister was with her shenanigans. "No you won't."
"Okayyy maybe not but consider this as payment for all the free weed you get because of me. AND as a fee for never telling me what's going on with you and worrying me to death as a result of your secrecy."
"You're not entitled to any financial compensation from me, Marilyn. Get out my room. I'll cover for you but you're not getting any money."
"But—"
"Out!"
Marilyn swung her arms around and stomped her feet, whining. "Fine. Next time I won't ask."
Lauren shook her head, ever so grateful for her sister's existence and how she always managed to cheer her up in any possible way. She reached for her notebook lying upside down beside her bed and sighed deeply. There was nothing more to say. And perhaps it was for the best. This was her chance to ditch a sinking boat for one that would reach the shore. Surely, Karla Cabello would only bring her down and this was her first warning sign to leave.