𝙤𝙪𝙩𝙚𝙧 𝙗𝙖𝙣𝙠𝙨 - 𝙢𝙞𝙨𝙨𝙞𝙣𝙜

𝕥𝕙𝕚𝕣𝕥𝕖𝕖𝕟

I woke up around 8:15 to a text of my dad "me and you mothers picked up your car from back home cause it was shipped in last night looks in good shape" that excited me but as I scrolled through all my messages I noticed my nana an pa hadn't answered my message from a couple of days ago which left me curious.

I quickly made my bed and went and ate breakfast with my grandpa as my grandmother was at work already I give him a hug and said I'll be down again soon.

I left the door and walked the quickest way to figure eight from the cut as I could.

Outside my drive was my black matte car "looks better then before" I said quietly to no one. I had a plan for later so I went in and said hi to my mam and dad. My dad gave me the keys and then went to my room.

I picked out a royal blue tube top and white soft shorts I put on my shoes white converses and a white cap with my hair down.

I slipped my phone into my pocket and ran down the stairs in excitement of going for a drive in my car which I haven't seen since I've been in outer banks.

Once I got in my car I decided where to go so I took a trip to see my other grandparents who lived in chapel hill so I did I drove my car down to the pier and parked it I made sure it was locked.

I walked over and checked the signs looking for chapel hill I found it and went up to the man "ticket for one please" I said he just grunted and give me my change. I got on and found a seat next to the window.

I got flashbacks of what I was doing as if it was like before when I would go with my mother and brother, but this time I was by myself without my mother knowing.

When I arrived I got out of the boat i began to walk but as I was about to turn the corner of a street i heard someone call my name which made me turn it was Sarah and John b she ran up to me and give me a hug they was both sweating which confused me "what are you pair doing here?" I asked "u-h I don't really know honestly" she said and looked at John b "what are you doing here" John b asked "just a lil trip to see people" I said smiling "anyone special?" John b said raising an eyebrow.

I knew John b was thinking that I was here to meet a boy "shut up" I laughed as I walked past them I nudged his arm I turned walking back "you guys have a good time"  I said smiling Sarah waved goodbye  while John b smiled looking proud of me.

After a few minutes of skipping through chapel hill after my conversations with John b and Sarah I headed my way to my grandparents.Once I got there I walked up the steps and knocked on the door.

My pa answered the door I gave him a hug before he could say anything "Paige" He said in a excited tone "hey pa it's good to see you again" I said we let go "oh come on in kiddo" he said i walked in the house hadn't changed from what it used to look like years ago.

We sat down in the living room opposite each other "want anything like a drink, food?" My grandpa asked "no I'm okay pa" I replied we had a conversation then for around 30 minutes.

I looked around the house it was still and quiet I knew my nana hadn't come in I thought she would've come downstairs by know "where is she?" I asked "where's who kiddo" he replied "nana is she home?"

He looked down at the rug "they haven't told you have they" he said sadly "t-told me what, is she okay?is she safe what haven't they told me pa" I asked him panicky "she's.. passed away Paige" he said his eyes watery "your lyiny.. when.. how" I said eyes now watering "December, illness w-we couldn't save her" he said voice breaking.

"This can't be real... i don't believe you" I said as I placed my elbows on my knees and hands on my head "wh-y wouldn't they tell me" I said my pa couldn't think of why my parents didn't tell me so he just stayed quiet.

Minutes went passed "she left you something, come with me" I followed him after wiping my tears I followed him upstairs he got a white box out filled to the brim with stuff "do you want a bag to carry it in" he asked "yes please" I replied.

He got one for me and I slid in the box and held it I checked the time "oh god" I mumbled "what's wrong" he said sounding generous "my boat I'm going to miss it, I-I got to go" I give him a hug "is it okay if I come back again soon" I asked "of course" he said.

After saying my goodbye I put the tote bag on my shoulder and rushed to the boat.

I showed him my ticket so that I could get on all the seats was filled which made me end up sitting on the front of the boat which was open.I put my tote bag on the chair next to me and put my knees to my chest and hugged my knees tightly.

I couldn't believe my nana had passed away I felt empty and isolated I felt as if people thought I was fragile, weak nearly.This was because nobody told me not my parents not even my brother and the fact they had lied to me since I've been back home made my stomach turn.

But...

how can the dead be truly dead,
when they still live in the souls that have been left behind?

Death doesn't happen to a person,
It happens to the people around them,
the people supposed to be standing around their funeral.

But I guess that never happened for me.

Memories of my nana began to form in mind.Tears started to fall down my cheek I just but my head into knees I really couldn't believe it.

Was my parents really that spiteful?

I lifted my head off my knees and saw John b and Sarah on the outside seats which was opposite the front seats indoor they was dressed up John b looking smarter then ever before. Me and John b made eye contact he smiled which i did faintly back.

It was obvious the pair was talking about me as John b began talking to Sarah after smiling at me which then Sarah looked at me in concern.

I didn't know what I was going to do as I couldn't go home to my parents as I couldn't bare to look at them nor my brother I thought we told each other everything obviously it was one sided.

Once the boat came to a stop I quickly grabbed my bag and got off but as I was outside ready to get in my car but a hand tapped my shoulder.

As I turned around it was John b "oh hi... John b" I acted as if nothing was wrong he smiled "you okay you looked really-y upset back there" he said talking about my emotions made me confused "I-I don't know what to do" my voice cracked a little "I don't know if I should be angry, sad" I said I felt tears in my eyes bottle up which John b noticed he quickly wrapped his arm around me I had my hand on his chest which he didn't mind "it's okay" he said he then asked "want to talk about it?" sounding generous I shook my head "not here" I said shaking my head.

John b let go of our brace "let's go somewhere then" I smiled lightly "follow me" I walked over to my car John b ended up getting in my car in the passenger seat.

Obviously you would think I would be in tears but I pushed my thoughts away this just brought a feeling of emptiness and confusion.

I didn't even know a date. Time. How.
It was a lot to take in at ones.

"nice car" he said "thanks John b" silence came to the car "i didn't know you could drive" he said "well know you know that means I can drive-" I responded to him "no" he cut me of and began to laugh making me smile."what do you want to do?" I asked John b "hmm what about food we can sit down and talk" he said "where do you want to go" I questioned, John b then told me directions of where to drive.

I pulled up outside "The Wreck" restaurant which I felt as if I had been before. Me and John b got out the car making sure I locked the car.

We got in and we picked two stools that was by a window. John b went and ordered what we wanted and then we began to talk.

I told John b about how I messaged them and they didn't respond and once my car came it felt like the right time to see them. I then told him how I saw him and Sarah and then went to my grandparents house.

I told him about how it was only my pa and how I thought my Nan was sleeping so I brought it up and how she wasn't there, I then told him how my pa said "they haven't told you" obviously John b knew what I was on about once I said it.

I told him about the box she left "you haven't looked what's in it?" He questioned "I haven't had time" I said.

After opening up to John b about my lying parents and how I've told him about my past with Steve who was my ex boyfriend back in the Bahamas.

I'd always felt comfortable around him and sort of safe.

I act careless and people can think what they want of me I overthink... I overthink everything actually I never have the chance to talk about my past or the madness that happens in my current life because most people would think I'm crazy, but with John b he doesn't look at me differently he sees me as brave.

As I opened up to John b he opened up to me he said he related to me he told me about the parcel that I had got for him and how it had a tape in it from his dad.He told me that the tape confirmed his dad was dead a gave him a hug as I guessed it was a touchy subject.

He also told me the real reason why him and Sarah went to chapel hill and about the royal merchant that his dad was looking for.

I know me losing my nana was touchy but John b had nobody his mother left him and now his dead was confirmed dead I couldn't relate to the loneliness he must feel I still had family John b didn't.

After food I paid as it felt like I should've we then got back in the car realising that is could go home "shit" I mumbled "what's wrong" John b asked "I cant go home and I'd be cheaky if I go to my grandparents again" I drove my way to John bs "you can stay mine if you want" I looked at him slowing the car down "really? you won't be freaked out by that" I said "no it'll be fine like old times" he said I smiled "thanks John b" I said generously.

I drove down to John bs house on the bumpy road, once we arrived we went inside Jj was home "hi John b and... Paige" he said sounding confused I took my shoes and left them at the front by the door.

I slumped into the chair while John b went to his room.

"hi Jj" I said quietly I felt his eyes on me "hey what's up with you" he said taking a seat next to slithering his arm over my shoulders.

He rubbed his thumb softly on my arm meanwhile I leant my head onto his body "I don't know how to say it" I hummed "hey it's okay take us much time as you want, you don't have to tel me we can just sit here for as long as you want" he said softly.

"Thankyou Jj" I said

"Anytime" he replied.

I got comfy by lifting my legs up onto Jj legs, he slipped my shoes of and looked me in my eyes I smiled at him which he did back he placed his hand on my thigh and rubbed his thumb in circles.

I closed my eyes as they got heavy.

{JJ}
I looked at the girl who was know asleep either her plumbed lips slightly opened and her long eyelashes that was tight shut hiding her green eyes.

Jj didn't like to admit but he could look at the girls features forever, he could count how many freckles was placed on her rosey bronzed cheeks and he forehead.

When he looked into her eyes he felt as if the girls had moved on, but he couldn't know.

But he cared for the girl more then anyone.

Every after that time spent away from her even though it was painful and long he couldn't help but fall for the girl all over again.

He clenched his jaw slightly trying not to smile as John b walked in.

The boys talked about Paige, John b was explaining to Jj what had happened so that he had a better understanding when Paige was going to tell him in the morning and once they got tired.

Jj lifted the girl up with his arms and placed her into his bed he slid in next to her but kept his distance and me he didn't know if that is what Paige wanted.
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𝗠𝗲 𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗲:𝗽𝗹𝗼𝘁 𝘁𝘄𝗶𝘀𝘁? 𝗛𝗼𝗻𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗹𝘆 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝘄𝗮𝘀 𝗵𝗮𝗿𝗱 𝘁𝗼 𝘄𝗿𝗶𝘁𝗲 𝗮𝘀 𝗶𝘁'𝘀 𝗻𝗲𝘄 𝘁𝗼 𝗺𝗲, 𝗵𝗼𝗽𝗲 𝘂 𝗰𝗿𝗶𝗲𝗱 𝘅𝗼𝘅𝗼

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗱𝗶𝘀𝗰𝗹𝗮𝗶𝗺𝗲𝗿!

𝗜 𝘄𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱 𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗰𝗹𝗲𝗮𝗿 𝘂𝗽:

𝟭) 𝘀𝗮𝗿𝗮𝗵 𝗰𝗮𝗺𝗲𝗿𝗼𝗻 𝘄𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗯𝗲 𝗮𝗽𝗮𝗿𝘁 𝗼𝗳 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗣𝗼𝗴𝘂𝗲𝘀 𝗯𝘂𝘁 𝘄𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗮 𝗺𝗮𝗷𝗼𝗿 𝗽𝗮𝗿𝘁 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗯𝗼𝗼𝗸.

𝟮) 𝗽𝗮𝗶𝗴𝗲 𝘄𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝘀𝗹𝗼𝘄𝗹𝘆 𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗿𝘁 𝗴𝗼𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗼 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗻𝘁𝘀 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗣𝗼𝗴𝘂𝗲𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗹𝗲𝗮𝗱 𝘁𝗼 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗴𝗼𝗹𝗱 𝗯𝘂𝘁 𝗜 𝘄𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱 𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝘁𝗮𝗹𝗸 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝗹𝗼𝗼𝗸 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗳𝗮𝗺𝗶𝗹𝘆 𝗹𝗶𝗳𝗲 𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗹𝗹.

𝟯) 𝗹𝗮𝗰𝗲𝘆 𝗶𝘀 𝗮𝗽𝗮𝗿𝘁 𝗼𝗳 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗣𝗼𝗴𝘂𝗲𝘀 𝗮𝘀 𝘀𝗵𝗲 𝘄𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗮 𝗯𝗶𝗴 𝗽𝗮𝗿𝘁 𝗹𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘂𝗽.

𝟰) 𝗷𝗼𝗵𝗻 𝗯 𝗶𝘀 𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲 𝗮 𝗯𝗿𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝗳𝗶𝗴𝘂𝗿𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗽𝗮𝗶𝗴𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁'𝘀 𝘄𝗵𝘆 𝘀𝗵𝗲 𝗶𝘀 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗻𝘁𝗹𝘆 𝗼𝗽𝗲𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘂𝗽 𝘁𝗼 𝗵𝗶𝗺, 𝗯𝘂𝘁 𝘄𝗲 𝗮𝗿𝗲𝗻'𝘁 𝗿𝗲𝗽𝗹𝗮𝗰𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗵𝗲r 𝗯𝗿𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿 (𝘇𝗮𝗸) 𝗯𝗲𝗰𝗮𝘂𝘀𝗲 𝘀𝗵𝗲 𝗱𝗼𝗲𝘀 𝗰𝗮𝗿 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗵𝗶𝗺 𝗯𝘂𝘁 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗷𝗼𝗵𝗻 𝗯 𝗮𝘀 𝗮 𝗯𝗿𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝗳𝗶𝗴𝘂𝗿𝗲 𝘄𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗵𝗲𝗹𝗽 𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝗶𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗳𝘂𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗲.

𝗧𝗛𝗔𝗡𝗞𝗬𝗢𝘂 𝗙𝗢𝗥 𝗥𝗘𝗔𝗗𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗧𝗛𝗜𝗦!!